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Game Show Host: Welcome back! Inside The Biggest Genius’s sound-proof Diary Closet, Professor Calamltous will reveal to us all how he intends to use tonight’s 3 theme ingredients.
Professor Finbarr Calamitous: Two. Two. Is this thing on? Seem what happens when Fairies eat too many Krabby Patties? They create Magical gas. Who would have guessed? Just perfect for the creation of my VAST ARMY OF EVIL TOYS! Mwahaha! Powered by Ghost Energy, my evil army will be lead by evil toy duplicates of goody two-shoes heroes. My robot minions grab the best hero from every dimension than scan them to create an evil "master model". Then we send them back home none wiser. Mwahahaha!
Game Show Host: Krabby Patties, Faries and Ghost Energy. How will our contestant’s hero duplicates turn out?
Professor Calamitous: I prefer the term "perfect evil sidekicks".
Game Show Host: Will these sidekicks be better than the originals?
Professor Finbarr Calamitous: Yes, of course they will.
Game Show Host: Will the Professor shave off his ridiculous mustache?
Professor Finbarr Calamitous: Never! No! Not even in a million years! You mean… you don’t like it?
Game Show Host: Will the most miniscule contestant become tonight’s Biggest Genius?
Professor Calamitous: I’m not here to lose, so why not just give me the title now! Ha! There’s two of them out of the contest already. Mwahahaha!
Game Show Host: It appears that we’re experiencing some technical difficulties. We’ll be right back after the break!
Spongebob: Here’s your Krabby Patty take out order guys. All three million, two hundred and seventy seven of them. Each one of these scrump-dillyicious Krabby Patties has been lovingly cooked by me.
Patrick: OOH! And I did the washing up.
Spongeob: Are you guys having a party? A few hundred friends coming over to stay for a year or two? Hey! What are you doing?
Patrick: My best friend Spongebob cooked each and every one of them with his own hands, wearing his own square pants. If you don’t want to eat them at least you can… Whooooaaaahhhhh!
Spongebob: Patrick! Noooo! I’ve got to get back in there and rescue my best friend. But how, how?
Computer: Defective Work Unit 825. Reject. Reject. Reject. Have a nice day and don’t forget to call again when you are feeling better.
Sponegbob: I wonder If…?
Computer: Ah! Work Unit 825… Feeling better are we? Good! Then come on in!
Patrick: Spongebob! Help! Wheee! [laugh]
Spongebob: Hold on Patrick, I’ll save you! Patriick! Don’t worry, Patrick, you’re invertebrate! No bones to break! I’m on my way, pal! Stay calm! There’s got to be some way to get you out of there! Marco!
Patrick: Polo! Marco!
Patrick: Spongebob! I’m over here! Oof! Oop! Umph!
Sponebob: Hold on, Patrick, I’ll save you! Hey, this is just like surfing at Goo Lagoon… OOF! Only there’s not soft sand to land on. Patrick? Patrick? Where are you?
Patrick: Mmmmph… mmph! Mmmmph!
Spongebob: Patrick! Thank Neptune I found you!
Patrick: Was that you?
Spongebob: No, that wasn’t me! You’ve been vacuum packed. I’m trying to get you out of here.
Spongebob: Sorry. Hey little fellow; who are you?
Tak: I’m Tak of the Pupununu People. You are the good guys aren’t you?
Spongebob: Sure, it’s the beady red eyes that are dead give away for the evil fellows. I’m Spongebob Squarepants, nice to meet you.
Patrick: I’m vacuum packed… I mean, I’m Patrick Star. What are you doing here?
Tak: I’ve been hiding and trying to figure out a way to escaping these evil toys.
Spongebob: But… these toys, they look like you.
Tak: Yeah, me and some kid named "Timmy Turner". But check out the eyes.
Both: Red! Jinx!
Tak: These things come from something called the "EvilToyCo". After the robots captured and scanned me I escaped, and hide here.
Spongebob: So, where’s the real Timmy Turner?
Tak: I don’t know, but now you two are here, I think I can use my Juju powers to find him.
Spongebob: "Who-who" powers? You have a plan?
Tak: Yep. Follow me. I call upon the Power of Juju to open the door!
Patrick: Look! A vast and complex toy factory!
Tak: This must be where they make the evil toys.
Spongebob: Nice work! You’ve earned yourself a big tick, Tak.
Spongebob: Look! It’s Timmy Turner!
Tak: They got you too?
Timmy Turner: Yeah, the last thing I remember was the really strange dream with UFOs picking me up… …but looking around here, that was no dream. More like a reality nightmare.
Spongebob: What about your helpful little flying friends? Maybe they could help.
Timmy Turner: Maybe… Cosmo! Wanda! Are you alright?
Wanda: We ate too many processed Krabby Patties!
Cosmo: And now we feel all… sleepy.
Timmy Turner: But… but I need some emergency wishes!
Wanda: I’m sorry, Timmy; between us, we’ve only got enough magic to make sure no harm comes to you and your friends.
Cosmo: Well, permanent harm anyway.
Timmy Turner: That’s better than nothing, I guess.
Spongebob: There he goes again…
Tak: The Power of Juju tells me there are other heroes here…
Tak: I dunno. Trapped somewhere. Come on.
- Spongebob: Let’s go sliding! Look! It’s Jimmy Neutron!
- Tak: Jimmy who-tron?
- Patrick: Oh, he’s a friend of ours. We go way, way back. He’s got a big head.
- Spongebob: How do we get him out?
- Computer: I can help you there. Press the big red button.
- Jimmy Neutron: Leapin’ Leptons! What’s goin’ on here?
- Patrick: Uh, why… nothing! Nothing at all…
- Computer: Find a way to the Basement, I will meet you there. I have a proposal for you.
- Tak: I call upon the power of Juju!
- Professor Finbarr Calamitous: So you see, it’s the energy from the Ghost Zone that will power my evil toys. And that is why I will be named he Biggest Genius!
- Chadbot: Not before I name you the worst boss in history! Ah! Hello Intruders, I am Chadbot, Professor Calamitous hard working and under-apprecdated Helpbot. He makes me work too hard here and as for that mustache…
- Jimmy Neutron: Chadbot, I’m not big on the lip caterpillar either! Do you think you could help us contact our friend Danny Phantom?
- Spongebob: Jimmy Neutron, you’re a boy genius! Danny knows everything about Ghost Energy with his help, we can stop the professor and save the toys from becoming evil. What do you think Mr. Chadbot? Can you help us?
- Chadbot: Help you? Would my Dimensional Communicator that allows you to talk to your friend Danny Phantom help you?
- Jimmy Neutron: You bet. What are we waiting for, big guy?
- Chadbot: What are we waiting for, big hair, are more action figures to add to my collection. These are some of the Master Models that Professor "Bad Mustache" created. Each one of perfectly crafted replica of the heroes he "borrowed". You bring me more of my collection and I’ll let you use the Dimensional Communicator to talk to your friend. Deal?
- Jimmy Neutron: Deal! Err… maybe will stick with a handshake. Say what?
- Danny Phantom: I said, I wasn’t at home when Professor Calamitous’ invading toy army took over my house, to use the energy coming from the Ghost Portal. And now it’s surrounded by big tin robots that look like Sam and me.
- Jimmy Neutron: That’s what I thought you said. We have to stop Calamitous stealing any more Ghost Energy! You and Sam need to meet me at the Amity Park EvilToyCo outlet pronto!
- Danny Phantom: What are you going to do?
- Jimmy Neutron: Don’t worry, I have a plan. See you there. Let’s see how giant toy robots deal with a little competition!
- Timmy Turner: It’s Evil Toy butt-kicking time! Now, who wants to go first?
- Danny Phantom: Giant Evil Toy Jimmy, you are down and out. Cleanup in aisle seven!
- Timmy Turner: Hey, check out the other evil toys.
- Patrick: They’re shutting down!
- Spongebob: I’d call it giving up.
- Tak: We can use the toy store portal to get back to the factory.
- Sam: And shut it all down. Come on, it’s time for a little payback.
- Jimmy Neutron: A little payback? I’m aiming for a lotta payback! Let’s go.
- Professor Finbarr Calamitous: I don’t know why I ever called you Elite Toys because you’re not! You’re loser toys! Because of you, I lost my supply of Ghost Energy. Sponge Booby and those other do-gooder heroes are inside my factory. Mister Huggles!
- Mister Huggles: Front and center!
- Professor Finbarr Calamitous: No. This position is reserved for me! Mr. Huggles, I want your teddy shock-troops in action in my factory. Now!
- Chadbot: I would define your current situation as "not good".
- Patrick: Um, could you be more specific about the "not good" part.
- Chadbot: The Saucer Men originate from a zone in this factory.
- Patrick: Yep.
- Chadbot: You must stop Calamitous from using aforesaid Saucer Men to capture any more heroes.
- Patrick: I’m with you there.
- Chadbot: Stopping the Saucer Men will be even more difficult now.
- Timmy Turner: It’s going to be worse than… being baby-sit by Vicky.
- Patrick: Maybe I shouldn’t have asked for specifics.
- Chadbot: One moment young man. You haven’t forgotten our deal, have you?
- Jimmy Neutron: Of course not. What was it again?
- Chadbot: You were helping me add to my collection of action figures.
- Jimmy Neutron: Me and my friends, we are so onto it, Chad-boy.
- Danny Phantom: I’m going Ghost!
- Professor Finbarr Calamitous: Doesn’t anybody listen to Evil Professors anymore?! I said I have increase evil toy production, but to do that I NEED MORE FAIRIES!
- Minion: More fairies!
- Professor Finbarr Calamitous: Send the Savage Spongebots to Fairy World to protect the Harvester!
- Minion: Send the Savage Spongebots to Fairy World. Aha! That is the sound of Jorgen Von Strangle being neutralized. Nothing can stop us now!
- Professor Finbarr Calamitous: Who are you?
- Minion: I’m a minion. All evil professors have minions.
- Professor Finbarr Calamitous: You don’t do an evil laugh do you?
- Minion: (Biggest evil laugh in the world!) Like that you mean?
- Professor Finbarr Calamitous: I don’t want you doing that again. Is that perfectly clear? My Spongebots engage the Fairy Air Force so the Harvester can lure more. unsuspecting fairies into the mobile, all-you-can-eat storefront. Deviousness and evilness prevail! Mwahahaha! (Coughs) Sorry.
- Cosmo: Ooh…all you can eat for free!
- Patrick: (Giggles)
- Danny Phantom: Gaahhh!
- Wanda: Cosmo! No! You know what Krabby Patties do to you!
- Cosmo: Don’t worry: I’m prepared!
- Wanda: You’ve got to stop that Fairy Harvester before Cosmo gasses up again!
- Jimmy Neutron: Hmm… the machine’s control are right up at the front… and these pipes will lead us straight there! Let’s follow ‘em.
- Patrick: Geronimo!
- Jorgen Von Strangle: My thanks, puny heroes! So the evil professor think he can strangle the power of Jorgen Von Strangle with a cage. Ha! I ptooey on his mustache, rip it from his face and use it as a broom! No one calls Jorgen Von Strangle a mere fairy! I am a Magic Marine! Now I have biceps like small European nations.
- Danny Phantom: But that’s not covered by warranty…
- Jorgen Von Strangle: The evil Harvester is no more! I will take care of the mopping up with my huge mop. You must go and take care of that annoying little Professor man! Go, tiny hero people!
- Professor Finbarr Calamitous: I’d like to thank nobody but myself for this great honor is winning the Biggest Genius…
- Minion: Err… excuse me. Professor. You haven’t won yet.
- Professor Finbarr Calamitous: I know. I know. I’m practicing my acceptance speech.
- Minion: But everyone can hear you.
- Professor Finbarr Calamitous: What do you mean? This is a diary closet isn’t it?
- Minion: It’s being broadcast. They can hear you.
- Professor Finbarr Calamitous: Why didn’t you tell me? That’s your job isn’t it?
- Minion: Actually, my job description doesn’t clearly state that I am obliged to inform you of-
- Professor Finbarr Calamitous: I bet it doesn’t say anything about this either! Jimmy Neutron, Timmy Turner, Spongebob Squarepants, Danny Phantom, Tak, Samantha, Patrick… have I forgotten anyone? I will be declared the Biggest Genius in your hero do-gooder faces and there’s nothing you can do about it! Mwahahaha… …they’re heading towards my Lair! Why doesn’t anything ever work out for me? You didn’t see that apparent moment of weakness, did you?
- Spongebob: Look. It’s the Professor’s lair!
- Timmy Turner: A lair? How come he doesn’t live in a house?
- Jimmy Neutron: Rule twenty six b, subsection four of the Evildoers Handbook. The moment you become evil, you gotta move into a lair.
- Tak: Uh-oh. Here come the neighbors.
- Jimmy Neutron: Let’s give them some mech-suit mayhem!
- Timmy Turner: He’s got to be in there.
- Game Show Host: We are seconds away from calling time… And… TIME! And so, it comes to this, as it must, the moment where I have the honor, the privilege, the unmitigated pleasure to announce the winner of The Biggest Genius…
- Professor Finbarr Calamitous: Listen shoulder pads, just get on with it and tell me I’m the winner!
- Game Show Host: The judges have made their decision! The winner of the Biggest Genius is… The Chadbot!
- Professor Finbarr Calamitous: Chadbot?! My employee? But I didn’t even know you were a contestant!
- Chadbot: Your irrational desire to abduct the very best characters from every dimension has lead to my victory over you and your hairy lip.
- Game Show Host: Indeed, It is you, Mr. Chadbot that has magnificently combined all the theme ingredients. Krabby Patties… Fairies… …and Ghost Energy! In true genius fashion, you have gone even further to create the greatest collection of action figures in the world. Only the biggest Genius could have completed such a challenge!
- Chadbot: And I couldn’t have done it without my friends. Thank you.
- Professor Finbarr Calamitous: But, but…
- Chadbot: "Butt" is exactly what you got kicked.
- Game Show Host: Care to know what your prize is?
- Chadbot: Prize?
- Game Show Host: Not only do you get this fetching and fully synthetic, washable, drip-dry glow-in-the-dark sash that will make you the envy of all your friends and combust near an open flame, but you also receive your very own Professor Calamitous ImmobilizationBot. And an electric shaver.
- Professor Finbarr Calamitous: No, you can’t. Not the mustache. It took me years to grow it. (Cry of Dismay)
- [End of -Attack of the Toybots]