• Rebecca: Oh, Lance! I didn't mean for you to fall madly in love with me, but since Joaquim left with my evil half-sister...
    Cyborg: Yo! I don't love you. My name's not Lance, and I just wanna know if you've seen a fat guy in an overcoat.
    Rebecca: Oh, Lance! [kisses him soundly]
  • Pelican: Oh, have you seen my hippo? He hides and I must seek.
    Starfire: I cannot play. Please do you know
    a strange man named Control Freak?
    He is big, not tall and nasty
    and known for causing strife.
    He escaped into the TV...
  • Advertiser: The makers of Azarath and Metrion are proud to introduce ... Zinthos. New and improved Zinthos gives you exactly what you need, exactly when you need it. And because it's blue, Zinthos goes with everything.
    [continuing rapidly] Zinthos isn't right for everyone and may cause bloating, cramping, hair loss, disturbing visions, fits of rage, and the growth of additional eyes. Children under three should not be exposed to Zinthos. Do not get Zinthos wet, and never feed it after midnight. If you experience trouble meditating, stop saying "Zinthos" and consult your ancient scrolls immediately. - New blue Zinthos!
  • Control Freak: [mimicking Arnold Schwarzenegger's accent] Hasta la vista, Titans!
  • Cyborg: Hey, I know where we are! We're in the first episode of Season Four.
  • Host: My guest tonight is Dr. Victor Payton, who has discovered the secret to world peace. Tell me, Doctor -
    Robin: Do not watch this program! It will liquify your brain! An escaped criminal has tampered with this transmission, and it is imperative that you turn off your television right now. - I'm serious! Stop watching the show!!
    Raven: I don't think they're listening.
  • Space Hero: Who ... who are you?
    Control Freak: I am Count Rol Freako, the 12th-level Space Samurai who trained Baron Ryang. And I am your father!
    Space Hero: NOOO!!
  • Robin: So, I guess all this proves it really is bad to watch too much TV.
    Starfire: But, truthfully, we only prevailed because Beast Boy watches too much the television.
    Raven: So... there really isn't a lesson here?
    Cyborg: Nope! It was all completely meaningless!
  • Beast Boy: You do not need to see our identification [Robots start shooting] Ahhhh! Worth a shot!
  • News Caster: This just in! Interference by the criminal Control Freak has caused televisions throughout the city to emit harmful Alpha Waves, which disrupt the nural pathways of anyone watching the broadcast.
    Beast Boy: Huh?  
    News Caster: TV literally rots your brains.
    Raven: Told ya.
  • Robin: 500 channels!
    Raven: And still nothing on.
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