Please Don't Touch the Dinosaur


 * Danny: [to Jesse] I don't need advice from a guy who spent half his school years in the principal's office.
 * Jesse: Oh, look who's talking. You wanted to be hall-monitor just so you could bust people for putting their lips on the drinking fountain.
 * Danny: If it weren't for people like you, we wouldn't have needed hall-monitors.


 * Jesse: Rules were meant to be broken.
 * Danny: Pinatas were meant to be broken.


 * Michelle: I broke the dinosaur!
 * Denise: Man! There's nothin' left but his butt!

After the dinosaur in the museum is destroyed.
 * Danny: Jesse... what did you do?!
 * Jesse: You have any glue?

After Michelle, Jesse and Danny come home from the museum.
 * Danny: Hey, Jess... tell me again. The foot bone's connected to what?
 * Jesse: C'mon, give it a rest, okay? They said they could fix the dinosaur, and I promised to do volunteer work at the museum. For the next 10 weekends in a row, I'm gonna be combing out the woolly mammoth.
 * Danny: You're lucky they didn't press charges. You know, I asked you to make sure that the kids follow the rules, but did you listen to me?! No, not you! Not "Mr. Fun Boy"!
 * Jesse: C'mon, Mr. Law and Order, I was just tryin' to let the kids have some fun, and so it got a little outta hand.
 * Danny: A little outta hand?! Jess, a little out of hand is cutting in line at the algae exhibit. You let the kids run totally wild! They knocked over a priceless dinosaur!
 * Jesse: Oh come on, it's not priceless, they said it was only worth about like, 4,000,000 bucks!
 * Danny: When are you gonna stop tryin' to be Mr. Cool, and start taking your responsibilities more seriously?
 * Jesse: When are you gonna get off my back?
 * Danny: I'll get off your back when you start acting like a grown man!
 * Michelle: Stop it! Stop fighting! I'm the one who knocked it over, you remember? It's my fault! [She runs upstairs, very upset and in tears.]
 * Danny: Let's go [Both he and Jesse head upstairs.]