Smurf-tastrophe!

[A massive rain storm is falling on the Smurf Village.]


 * Army Corps of Engineers Smurf: Papa Smurf, Papa Smurf! It is smurfing like a mothersmurfer! What if the dam breaks?!
 * Papa Smurf : This is exactly why I'm Papa Smurf and you're just...uhhh...uh...uh which smurf are you?


 * Army Corps of Engineers Smurf: Oh, I'm Army Corps of Engineers Smurf!


 * Papa Smurf: That dam was smurfed by the finest construction crew the forest has to offer.

''[Cuts to several beavers. One has it's head stuck in a bucket, one is hiting it's head against a tree and one is humping another beaver. Suddenly the crappy wooden dam, just a few logs piled haphazardly across the river, breaks.]''


 * Grandpa Smurf: I didn't evacuate when them chipmunks went rabid, and that was bad. Sure as hell ain't evacuating for a little rain. [flood water then crushes him]

[Smurf village is shown flooded, with Smurf bodies floating in the water.]


 * Anderson Cooper: Destruction. Devestation. A community in ruins. How did it come to this? Why did the dam fail?

[News footage shows bodies, two smurfs holding up a sign that says "Smurf Fema" before a hawk swoops in and grabs one of them and a smurf looting a T.V from an appliance store.]

[Cuts to Gargamel's home, who is watching Anderson Cooper on TV.]


 * Gargamel: I've spent my entire adult life searching for the smurf village. How did Anderson (fuck)ing Cooper find it in less than a day?"


 * Anderson Cooper: "And where is the king during the greatest crisis the forest has ever known?"


 * Brainy Smurf: Papa Smurf says that the king doesn't care about blue people, and Papa Smurf is always right, because Papa Smurf...

[Begins to look around surprised]


 * Brainy Smurf: Papa Smurf?


 * Anderson Cooper: What is it, Brainy?


 * Brainy Smurf: Usually the other smurfs kick me out of the village when I start talking too much, but... there are no smurfs left!

[Brainy starts crying]

[Gargamel is scooping up dead smurfs in a fishing net.]


 * Gargamel: Ha Ha Ha! This is the best day of my life! (laughs)

[Gargamel is cutting up smurf bodies, putting them in blenders and pulling out a bowl of smurfs from the oven.]

[Gargamel is at the dinner table]


 * Gargamel: Triumph at last! (laughs)

''[Takes a bite of the smurf meal and immediately has a disgusted look on his face. He then takes the plate of smurfs over to the garbage can throws them away.]''


 * Gargamel: [on the phone ordering take-out looking depressed] Hello it's Gargamel, yes the usual. Oh, with fried rice please! For one. [hangs up phone and sighs]