I'm Not Here

''[Open to Old Steven sobbing quietly in a dark room. He holds a gun to his head, eyes closed and taking deep breaths. He's ready to take his own life until he hears the giggles of a little boy in his distant memories.]''

WOMAN AND CHILD: [memory] [singing] Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear daddy. Happy birthday to you! Ya! [cheering]

MAN: [memory] Who wants cake?

CHILD: [memory] Me!

''[Old Steven is asleep, laying on his stomach and blankets thrown around. The sound of liquor and chatter murmured in his ear. It's like a spilt second he's back in the past, he sees a glass being filled. A little umbrella twirls in the sunlight. A little boy is handed something before he starts to play around, jumping and running towards a door. Tires screech to a holt. Steven's awake. He opens a candy and pops it in his mouth. Rolling on his back, he stares at the ceiling.]''

WOMAN AND CHILD: [memory] [singing] Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear daddy. Happy birthday to you! Ya! [cheering]

''[Old Steven is obviously not healthy. He's too skinny for his age and he can hardly get out of bed. He gets the same memory of the tiny umbrella twirling in the wind. With that, he gets up. He grips onto the walls as he makes his way to the bathroom, sitting down and leaning his head back. The telephone rings.]''

STEVE: [voicemail] I'm not here.

AUTOMATED VOICE MESSAGE: [on phone] This is the department of power. This is our final attempt to collect contact Steven James Harrison. And if we do not receive payment by midnight tonight, the power will be disconnected.

''[The voicemail ends. Old Steve uses one of his old mails as toilet paper. The bill flushing down the drain. He stands in front of the mirror to gaze at himself, checking his teeth and face. Suddenly, we cut to a young man (Steve) and woman (Karen), Karen stands behind Steve and kisses his shoulder and neck as she talks.]''

KAREN: This is Steven James Harrison.

''[Steve gives a grin and we cut back to Old Steven in the mirror. He's very sad, he looks down and spits into the sink. In the sink is blood, he glances at it before turning on the water. He turns around and takes out his flask, dumping out the contents of a small glass near the sink to put the liquor of the flask into it. Old Steven takes a big gulp and gurgles what he's put in his mouth.]''

MOM: You gotta take better care of yourself, Stevie.

''[Stevie is having his mother brush his teeth while he watches her through the mirror. This looks similar to the bathroom Old Steven was in, cups in the place but much cleaner and bright.]''

MOM: [sighs] You only get one life, don't waste it like I did.

[Stevie takes the cup full of water and takes some in his mouth, he holds it.]

MOM: Well? Spit!

''[Stevie spits it all into the sink and we're back to Old Steven. He can't get out of his mind. Memories haunt him every day. He waddles over and grabs his night gown. In the kitchen he sets down a container and a bottle of what seems to be Scotch sits there. A flash of a memory of his mother throwing down an envelope and her keys. He goes to take a bite of his noodles but pulls away with a grimace, sniffing he realizes its gone bad. He knocks down a salt shaker and a memory starts again.]''

''[It's Christmas, music is playing and little Stevie sits at the dinner table with noddles in front of him. HIs mother scrubs at the counters and walks to the table.]''

MOM: Don't you want any sauce?

''[Stevie shakes his head and she sighs. Stevie smiles when his father comes home but his mother frowns and sends her husband a glare. He's obviously not sober, shirt untucked, hair messy, tie loose. He'd been out drinking. Nothing new to the family.]''

DAD: Hey there, tiger. [kisses Stevie's head] What a party, huh?

STEVIE: Mhm.

DAD: It was a really big shoe, don't ya think, mom?

''[The parents walk into the kitchen. Although it's not far from Stevie, they take semi seriously.]''

MOM: He can't drive himself?

DAD: His car wouldn't start.

MOM: It took long enough.

DAD: There's traffic.

MOM: Mmm.

[Stevie stops his eating to watch his parents fight.]

MOM: You've certainly drank enough tonight.

DAD: [sighs] Oh for Christ sakes, it's Christmas Eve.

MOM: [raising her voice] Don't start!

DAD: So what we were having a little bit of fun?

MOM: You too?

DAD: So shoot me!