The Routine

The Quest is Offered!
[''The skeleton of an ancient hero sits on a stone throne in a stone room illuminated by only a few rays of sunlight. It has some golden armor and it wields a spear in one hand and a shield under the other, sitting as if still watching over the space before it. '']


 * In an age long forgotten, legend speaks of an unsung hero. Some call him "The Couch Crusher", to others he is known simply as "The Oncoming Wind", but to a special few he is known as-

, & : Dad!

[''The scene cuts to Richard sleeping on the couch at home, in the same pose, the spear replaced by a broom, the shield by a half-eaten pizza in its box. Anais, Darwin and Gumball surround him. They are all poking him impatiently, to no avail.'']


 * Wake up!

[Gumball pokes his arm all the way into Richard's face.]


 * Gah! My arms are too short to reach a nerve!


 * Why do we wanna wake him up anyway?


 * Because, it's completely unfair that he gets to fetch out all day while we have to go to school!

& : Hmm!

[Nicole passes behind them as they continue their futile poking.]


 * If you want to wake him up you have to use the magic word.


 * "Please"?


 * No, "bacon".


 * [Sitting up and yelling in determination] Yeah-s!

[A bus honks outside]


 * Come on guys, you're gonna be late for school.


 * Why does he get to sit there all day?


 * He doesn't! He has a very important list of chores to do while I'm at work.

[''She takes out a list and show it to Gumball. It reads: "To Do List: (1) Get mayo" and nothing else.'']


 * "Get mayo"? Where's the rest of the list?


 * Wellll I've never seen him make it down to "(2)", so [shrugs] eh...


 * Heeey, it's not as easy as it looks... !


 * You're right, I'm sorry. [Dramatically] Please be careful o father on this dangerous and mighty quest!


 * Thank you!


 * I was being sarcastic... ?


 * Thank you?


 * [Closing the front door as he leaves] Never mind...


 * [Examining the list] Hmm... [He raises his broom and sunlight dramatically shines on it.]


 * And so begins our hero's quest. He shall not rest until her has returned, with the sacred sauce... [The broom tilts as Richard falls asleep.] Or maybe he shall quickly rest for a little bit - then dawn his quest for the sacred sauce... [Richard is still snoring.] Uuu-uuurgh! Let the quest begin!

[''Richard jumps to is feet startled. The scene cuts to a sequence as he gets dressed. ...TODO'']