Birth of A Salesman


 * [Jimmy is outside school, along with Carl, Sheen, Libby & Cindy.]
 * Jimmy: Ladies and gentlemen... and Cindy, I want to show you the greatest thing your eyes have ever beheld!
 * Carl: A llama?
 * Jimmy: No.
 * Carl: A baby llama?
 * Jimmy: [scoffs] No!
 * Carl: A baby llama with a little hat on?
 * Jimmy: [angerier] NO!
 * Cindy: An invention of yours that actually works? [She and Libby laugh.]
 * Jimmy: NO!!.. I mean...yes! I present to you... my latest neutronic invention ... [Presents three pieces of miniature books] ... Book Gum. why read a book when you can just chew the book instead?
 * Sheen: Wow, Jimmy, chewing a book.
 * Jimmy: Sheen, you don't actually chew a book. See, I reduced the contents of different books to gum form. You chew it, and you know it.
 * [He gives some gum to Sheen, who chews it.]
 * Sheen: Tastes... fishy. [starts quoting from Moby-Dick] "Call me Ishmael. Starbuck, it's the great white whale. I'll get you, Moby Dick!"
 * Cindy: Give me a piece of that. [Takes a piece and chews] Hmm... It tastes like fried chicken. [starts quoting from Gone with the Wind] "Oh, Ashley, Oh, Rhett. I don't know nothin' about birthin' no babies."
 * [Carl is about to taste a handful of gum pieces.]
 * Jimmy: Careful, Carl. It would be very dangerous to eat more than one at a time.
 * [Carl selects a piece.]
 * Carl: Mmm... William Shakespeare.
 * Jimmy: That might just be a little strong for you, Carl.
 * Carl: [quotes Romeo's monologue from Romeo and Juliet, during which Cindy rolls her eyes in amazement] "But soft, what light through yonder window breaks? It is the east and Juliet is the sun. See how she leans her cheek upon her hand. Oh, that I were a glove upon that hand that I might touch that cheek."


 * Jimmy: It's the good life, gentlemen. While the W.L. 3000 does all the work we're here enjoying a tall cold one.
 * Sheen: And plan our VIP trip to Retroland.
 * Carl: HUZZAH!
 * Sheen: What?
 * Carl: "Huzzah" some goofy way to say "COOL!"!
 * Man: What?!?
 * Willy: Goo-ood afternoon, sir. May I say you look absolutely f-f-fabulous? Ha-ha-ha, yes, I agree it is beautiful out, heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh-heh...
 * Man: I don't want to buy nothin'.
 * Willy: "Buy"? Who said "buy"? I-I-I'd like to give you a piece of c-candy, absolutely free with no strings attached.
 * Man: Forget it.
 * Willy: You can never have enough ca-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-andy, sir.
 * Man: I can. And I DO! Good-bye.
 * [The man almost closes the door, but Willy blocks it.]
 * Willy: Y-yes, y-y-y-yes, this is a "g-good buy".
 * Man: [struggling to close the door] What part of "NO!" do you not understand?
 * Willy: [holds up Goddard] How about if I throw in this free-ee-ee-ee dog if you buy a box?
 * Man: Hmm... what kind of dog is he?
 * Willy: He's your kind of dog. C-congratulations.
 * [Willy gives Goddard to the man, takes his money and slams the door]
 * Man: [from inside the house] Hey, what does he ea-? Wha-? Wha-? Oh! OH! not on the carpet, yo-! Ooh... Are those lug nuts?