The Finale Page Part 1


 * [Robin is administering Patrice's yearend performance appraisal - and she just fired her]
 * Patrice: Why would you fire me?
 * Robin: Because nobody should be as happy as you are! [goes to door and opens it] and also, your cookies? They're only... pretty good.
 * Patrice: [tries to step out but turns back at her] Robin, is this really about me?
 * Robin: [cracking] No its not. [Patrice embraces her]
 * Sandy Rivers: [enters] The old fire and bang. Respect, Scherbatsky.
 * Robin: I'm sorry. It's just that seeing you with Barney has run up some old feelings - and I really don't like feelings, but that's not your fault or Barney's fault. It's just really hard seeing you with him.


 * [Barney has shown Ted a diamond ring]
 * Ted: Oh my God, Barney -
 * Barney: You unjinxed me! I'm free!! If the bison on the nickel could heard you talk about them, they would diminish their population even further on purpose. If Lily wants a big wiener in her mouth, she's got my number. And I'm sorry you took all the rap for the farting on the car ride up here, that was me. [sighs]
 * Ted: The ring, what's the ring?
 * Barney: Right, the ring. I'm gonna ask Patrice to marry me.
 * Ted and Barney: Are you serious?
 * Barney: Jinx! Good, I need to say some things without you interrupting. Yes, I am serious. I know that if you could talk, you'd say I'm crazy, or that I'm overcorrecting, or that I'm moving too fast. But you would be wrong. Look, I've banged my way through every bimbo in the Tri-State Area and it left me feeling nothing but...but broken. But now with Patrice, for the first time in my life, I feel settled and happy. I want to feel this way forever. So tomorrow night, on the roof of the World Wide News building - that's Patrice's favorite spot - I'm gonna ask her to marry me. [cuts off Ted] You're jinxed. I'll unjinx you if you follow these two rules: one: you can't try to talk me out of it, and two: you can't tell anybody. Agreed? [sees Ted assent] It's a jinx swear, so if you break it, I get to hit you in the nuts three times with a Wiffle Ball bat. Thank you, Ted. [Marshall and Lily enter the car] Hi, guys!
 * Marshall: No, but you're jinxed!
 * Barney: I tricked Ted into saying my name.
 * Barney, Marshall and Lily: Aw, come on, Ted!
 * Barney: Jinx! Jinx! Ha-ha! The reign of terror is back! [Evil laugh] Hey, if you guys don't want me to smoke or fart in here, just speak up. Nothing? Great. Thanks for the spicy beef jerky, dude.