The Killer Robot Instability


 * Mrs Wolowitz: HOWARD, THE PHONE IS RINGING!
 * Howard: HERE'S A CRAZY IDEA, MA. ANSWER IT!
 * Mrs. Wolowitz: Hello. Alright, hold on one minute. IT'S YOUR FRIEND, LEONARD! HE WANTS TO KNOW WHY YOU'RE NOT AT SCHOOL, TODAY!
 * Howard: I DON'T GO TO SCHOOL, MA, I WORK AT A UNIVERSITY!
 * Mrs. Wolowitz: THAT'S A SCHOOL, NOW, PICK UP THE PHONE!
 * Howard: I DON'T WANNA TALK TO ANYBODY!
 * Mrs. Wolowitz: SHOULD I ASK LEONARD TO BRING OVER YOUR HOMEWORK?!
 * Howard: I DON'T HAVE HOMEWORK, I'M A GROWN MAN WITH A MASTER'S DEGREE IN ENGINEERING!
 * Mrs. Wolowitz: EXCUSE ME, MR. FANCY PANTS, WANT ME TO GET YOU A POPSICLE?!
 * Howard: CHERRY, PLEASE!
 * Mrs. Wolowitz: I ATE ALL THE CHERRY! ALL THAT'S LEFT IS GREEN!
 * Howard: YOU MAKE ME WANNA KILL MYSELF!


 * Mrs. Wolowitz: SHE RAN PAST ME! WAS I SUPPOSED TO TACKLE HER?!


 * Leonard: Forget the robot. What happened to you?
 * Penny: He slipped and fell.
 * Howard: Yes, I slipped and fell. In the bathroom. Bounced right off the tub.
 * Penny: Yes, now he knows what bathtubs are capable of doing when you don’t treat them with respect.


 * Howard: Once again, Penny and I have begun our little tango. The carnal repartee, the erotic to and 'fro. But as delicious as the appetizer might be, at some point we will HAVE to succumb and eat the entree while it's still (demonstrates a sizzle) hot!
 * Penny: Normally, I can just ignore you. I get it, you're a little peculiar. Like Sheldon...
 * Sheldon: EXCUSE ME, Penny. But in this room, you're the one who's a little peculiar.
 * Penny: You may be right. But back to you. I know you think you're just some smooth-talking ladies man, but the truth is you are just pathetic and creepy.
 * Howard: So...what are you saying?
 * Penny: I am saying it is not a compliment to call me do-able. It is not sexy to stare at my ass and say 'Oooh, it must be jelly 'cause jam don't shake like that.' And most of all, we are NOT dancing a tango, we're NOT to-ing and fro-ing, nothing's going to happen between us! EVER!
 * Howard: Wait a minute. This isn't flirting, you're serious.
 * Penny: Flirting? You think I'm flirting with you?!? I am not flirting with you. No woman is ever going to flirt with you! You're just going to grow old and die alone!