A Foot Too Big

[Twig snapping.]I got a bad feeling, mama. "You be careful, boy. Don't get yourself hurt none. " Don't worry your pretty little head, mama. Ain't nothing gonna happen to "The Finger". "Don't get cocky. You know he's out there". "He's watching you. " Don't nag me, mama! I ain't no little kid no more! [Bushes rustling.] [Sighs.] [Roars.] There. [Music box plays melody.] Too much? Do you really want my opinion? Only if you think it's perfect. It's perfect! Wow, that is just super neat. Thanks so much, Donnie! [Music box closes.] Well, got to go! Got some, uh, training to do [Chuckles.] Thanks again, Donnie! [Door opens, closes.] I can't even imagine how you're feeling right now. - Devastated. - Aw, man! I was totally gonna say "devastated"! I should've just went for it. I got to learn to trust my instincts! I mean That's rough, bro. [Groans.] Smooth move, genius. It's never gonna happen, Donnie. We're mutants. She's a girl. You're a giant talking turtle. The sooner you get used to it, the better. You know what you need? Huh? Huh, buddy? You know what you need? You to leave? A little forest ninja training! Ha! Huh? Huh? Sounds like fun, right? Right? Ha! [Whimpers.] [Grunting.] Aw, you guys are rustier than the Titanic's butt! No, we're you're not in the city anymore. You need to get used to this new environment no buildings, no subways. Lots of trees. Ugh, tell me about it. Well, what do you think? Hmm Turtle hunt. - Turtle hunt. - Both: Turtle hunt? You gonna help out, Leo? Yeah, I. [Groans.] Sorry. I guess I'm still not up to it. Enjoy your little hunt, guys. Dude! What do you mean by "turtle hunt"? You guys are gonna head into the forest. I'll give you a fiveminute head start, then I hunt you down. If you can't stay hidden for at least an hour, you'll have to Clean out the chicken coop. - No way! - Not the chicken coop, man! It smells like cheese fossils! It's got spiders so big, they play the banjo! [Banjo music plays.] We can't clean that thing! Then get moving. [Both yell.] How do we hide in the woods, anyway? There's no doors! Hmm. Ah! We could climb a tree. That's the first place he's gonna look. Could we burrow? Do Turtles burrow in the wild? I don't know. I've never been in the wild before. Have you? Does Jersey count? [Distant roaring.] What the heck was that? It's got to be Raph messing with us! - Right? - We got to hide, now! Aw, we are so cleaning that coop. Raph's gonna find us up here in, like, five seconds. - I don't think so. - Why not? [Growling.] Um Hi? [Both screaming.] [Roaring.] What is it? Some kind of monkey man? It looks like the mythical Sasquatch Bigfoot! [Both grunt.] He's too big. Run! [Screaming.] Come on, you're not even trying to hide! Both: Bigfoot! Yeah, right. If you think you're gonna get out of cleaning that coop by [all screaming.] Looks like we're gonna get some real training. [Roaring.] Booyakasha! [Yelling.] Bigfoot got some skills. Wah! [Crying.] Hey, are you stop! Guys, he's hurt! I don't think he wants to fight us. I think he's just scared. Scared. He can talk? Look at that sagittal crest. It could be a Paranthropus Robustus, a hominid long thought extinct! [Muffled.] Can't breathe! Okay, okay, easy now Easy. I can fix your arm if you let me. It. . It's okay. I want to help. It's not bad, but I'd like to take you home where we can clean it up and bandage it. Is that okay? Hello? Anybody? No way! We can't bring a giant apeman home with us! Of course we can. Mikey? Injured woodland creature? Bring him home. Two to one, Raph. Sorry. Hi. I'm Donnie. This is Raph, and this is Mikey. - I. - I? Okay, your name is I? I No name. Of course you have a name. You're Bigfoot! Bigfoot! [Laughs.] Bigfoot. Will you come with us? [Whimpers.] It's okay. You're gonna be safe with us. Why would he be scared of us? Well, mama Been hunting this hairy freak for years now. "And now he goes and finds hisself some more freaks!" Settle down, mama. Ain't no little green aliens gonna save Bigfoot from The Finger. Hello? Anybody home? We got company! What? You can't let anyone in. Why is the doorway full of hair? And a giant butt? Come on, it's okay. [Gasps.] It's Bigfoot! You brought Bigfoot home? Why everyone know Bigfoot name? Bigfoot, this is Leo, Casey, and April. He's hurt! I'll get the firstaid kit. You can't just bring home Bigfoot! [Chuckles awkwardly.] He needs our help Just until his arm gets better. Come on, let's get that wound cleaned up. Sure, but when I wanted to have a dog, you guys were like like, "no way. " You guys don't get it. Bigfoot is the missing genetic link between humans and the ape. This discovery will change the face of science itself. So it's bigger than talking Turtles? [Growls.] There you go. Try not to use it too much for the next few days. Mmhmm. - Bigfoot thank Donnie. - No problem. Bad man after Bigfoot. Name "The Finger". The Finger? Very bad mans. But Donnie good mans. Aw, thanks, Bigfoot. Donnie very good mans So good. Bigfoot Whoa. - Ah! - Love Donnie! But, but, but Bigfoot am lady! That Is great? That Is great! [Laughter.] Bigfoot bring meat! Where did you. . good meat. [Laughs.] Tender, tender. [Screams, retches.] Bigfoot make waste. Uh, make waste? [Foghorn blares.] Aah! Bigfoot! Donnie and Mikey need to learn to blend in out here, forest stealth. If you're gonna stay with us, at least you can help out. So show them some stuff, okay? I have to go clean out the tub. [Breathing deeply through mask.] Please don't grab my head again. Blend in. I can still see him. Mama, looks like Bigfoot got him a couple of little green alien buddies. The Finger is okay with that. [Weapon clicks.] Huh? [Gasps.] [Both screaming.] What are you ugh, you're squishing me! Darn it! Lost 'em, but not for long. Come on, Leo, give me your best! You'll gain no ground. Oh, man, Bigfoot is amazeballs with the foreststealth stuff! Bigfoot scared. Aw. Finger bad! Right, fingers are bad. Hey, Donnie, want to play the winner? Evening, Bigfoot. - What are you making? - Food! - Aah! - Donnie! Um, you realize That meat has fur? Mmhmm. Hmm? [Cat screeching.] [Screaming.] [Screeching.] [Screaming.] [Screeching.] [Screaming.] [Screeching.] [Meows weakly.] Bigfoot Need Help. Sure, what Bigfoot wa. . I mean, what do you want? Makeover. Huh? Okay, and a little off the top here. [Humming.] Well? Uh [Laughs.] So what do you think? Eat! Gah! Did you Wowwhoa. Uh, yeah, um, uh Thank you. Got to go, bye! [Whimpers.] Ugh. This is so uncomfortable. Bigfoot follows me around everywhere like a lovestruck puppy. Now you know how April feels. [Whimpers.] [Distant laughter.] So she's wearing makeup now, and she keeps making soup for Donnie. Do you think she's his type? Maybe after a shave! [Both laughing.] [Whimpering.] Bigfoot, wait! [Crying.] What is wrong with you guys? We didn't mean to hurt her feelings. Bigfoot! Wait up! [Crying.] Mama, your boy's got 'em right where he wants 'em. "Iffen you play your cards right, maybe you'll get your own alienhunting reality show!" Ooh, just like cousin Fatback! Ohhhhh, doggie! [Crying.] [Whimpering.] How many years The Finger been chasing you? Well, guess what. Mama says the chasing's over. Bigfoot, you gonna make mama and The Finger rich! "I'm so proud of you, The Finger. " Aw, shucks, mama What the huh? [Thud.] Puppies Too many puppies Aah! - Donnie, I just had the worst dream about - I'm not sympathetic right now, Mikey. The Finger has been debating whether to pickle us or stuff us. Ooh, pickle! Pickles taste so good! [Sighs.] Ain't got no room for these two on the cart, mama. Looks like The Finger's gonna have to stuff 'em right here. I've got an idea. Follow my lead. Hey, Finger! Your mama looks like a raisin! "What'd he say about me, The Finger?" Uh Your mama's so wrinkly, she looks like one of those little dogs With all the wrinkles. A Sharpei? Your mama's uh, your mama's a shrunken head! Shut up! "Destroy them. " Bad move, The Finger. The Finger got skills! Wah! [Groans.] Ha! Forest stealth! [Growling.] Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah, brother! Oh, yeah! Ha! [Gasps.] [Classical music.] [Gasps.] You can't beat The Finger! He's too strong for you! Hey, Finger! How many more explosive bolts you got in that quiver? [Groaning.] If The Finger's going down, he's taking Bigfoot with him! Bigfoot Bigfoot's a lady? The Finger can't shoot no lady! The finger's sorry, mama! He didn't know! He would never hurt no lady! [Crying.] There, there It am be okay. Huh? [Heart beating rapidly.] [Crying.] Bigfoot take care sad mans. [Grunting.] - Hey, April. - What's up, Donnie? I, um Well, I just wanted to let you know I won't be bothering you with music boxes anymore. I get it now. Donnie is to April as Bigfoot was to Donnie. I'm just A mutant. You're not just a mutant, Donnie. You're my mutant. Mwah. I understand nothing
 * 1) # This is gonna hurt! [Groans.]

Read more: https://www.springfieldspringfield.co.uk/view_episode_scripts.php?tv-show=teenage-mutant-ninja-turtles-2012&episode=s03e02