Mecha-Mouse

Narrator: It’s the eve of the city’s Two-For-One Festival. Jammed-packed with events, bargains and fun! All two for the price of one! As the city prepares for the celebration, a different preparation is underway in the secret laboratory of Dr. Two-Brains.

(Scene: Inside Dr. Two-Brains’ lair. The henchmen are playing cards. Two-Brains pushes a large object covered with a cloth behind the henchmen.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Behold! The Mecha-Mouse Mechanical Muscle Machine!

(He pulls off the cover, revealing a large metal mouse.)

Unnamed henchman: Ohh! Shiny! (Charlie drops his cards.)

Dr. Two-Brains: (sighs) Yes, shiny. It’s a mechanized suit, fully loaded with every goodie imaginable!

Unnamed henchman: That sounds great! What’s that mean?

Dr. Two-Brains: What’s it mean? It means WordGirl is finished, that’s what it means! She always gets the best of me, because she’s both smart AND strong. I’ve always been smart, very smart, but too weak. But now… (gets inside the mouse suit and it closes up) … with this suit, I’ll finally have my own muscle! There’s no way she can stop me! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

(The suit powers up, then suddenly shuts down.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Huh? (opens the mouse and sighs in frustration) Hang on. I’ll get the manual.

(He stomps away, then comes back holding a manual.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Oh! O-o-o, yes. And now, where was I? (He gets inside and the mouse closes up again.) It’s working! Ha-ha-ha-ha!

(The mechanical mouse begins moving around. Two-Brains steers it over to a stack of boxes, and smashes them with one movement of the mouse’s claw. Then its curled-up tail extends, smashing another stack of boxes behind it. The henchmen clap in excitement, while Two-Brains cackles from inside the mouse.)

Dr. Two-Brains: But seriously, this will help me finally accomplish one of my ultimate goals-- to buy or lease or time-share my very own personal private island! (evil laugh) Every evil scientist has one, it’s high time I had one too. Of course, if it’s two-for-one week, I’ll get another  identical  island for free, we’ll use that for cheese storage.

Unnamed henchman:  Identical ?

Dr. Two-Brains: Yes,  identical . As in, alike? Exactly the same? And now, with my Mecha-Mouse suit, I’m both smart AND strong! It’s the ultimate two-for-one! And once I get my private islands, I shall be unstoppable! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

(The henchman laugh along with him.)

Unnamed henchman: Yeah! You can do it all now. It’s almost like you don’t need us anymore.

Dr. Two-Brains: Henchman, that’s the smartest thing you’ve said all day.

Unnamed henchman: Thanks!

Dr. Two-Brains: You’re fired.

Unnamed henchman: What?

Dr. Two-Brains: Oh, don’t look so  astonished ! You said it yourself! (mimicking him) This suit can do everything you can do, only better! Remember you said that?

Unnamed henchman: Oh. Hey, Doc! Can we still come to the island?

(Scene: the Art Museum. There are balloons and streamers set up outside. Becky and Bob are looking around inside.)

Narrator: The next day, the Two-For-One Festival begins. And at the Art Museum, our heroes enjoy the two-for-one special exhibit…

Narrator’s Brother: ...totally unaware of the danger about to descend on the city, and on the world!

Becky: Whoa! Who was that?

Narrator: Oh, that’s my brother! He’s here for the Two-For-One Festival. You know, two narrators, one episode?

Narrator’s Brother: Enchanted to meet you!

Narrator: He’s a little theatrical.

Becky: I think the whole idea of the Two-For-One Festival is two of the SAME. You guys aren’t anything alike.

Narrator: Oh no, we’re  identical  twins.

Narrator’s Brother: I am twenty seconds older.

Becky: Right. Got it.

(There is a loud crash. Mecha-Mouse has come through the side of the building.)

Dr. Two-Brains: It is I, Dr. Two-Brains! I hope you enjoyed these priceless works of art, because I’m about to do a little two-for-one shopping! Super limberger double-smelly stink spray, times two!

(He unleashes a foul odor through the mouse’s paws, and it travels throughout the museum.)

Becky: C’mon, Bob! Word UP! (transforms)

(The mecha-mouse starts “eating” numerous priceless works of art. WordGirl and Huggy land in front of it.)

WordGirl: Hold it right there, Two-Br-- UGH! (breathing in the noxious odor) The stench! It’s disgusting!

Dr. Two-Brains: To me, it smells like victory! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! My new suit has lots of fun surprises. Take a big whiff, WordGirl.

WordGirl: Well, it won’t prevent me from stopping you. Right, Captain Huggy Face?

Dr. Two-Brains: Bring it on, kiddo!

(WordGirl flies toward the Mecha-Mouse at breakneck speed. But when she collides with it, she simply bounces off and falls to the ground.)

WordGirl: Hey! What gives?

Dr. Two-Brains:  Astonishing , isn’t it?

(She flies at him again. This time, the mouse’s claws catch her.)

WordGirl: Ow!

Dr. Two-Brains: (evil cackle) I’m stronger than WordGirl, I’m stronger than WordGirl!

WordGirl: Can’t-- get free! (He throws her behind him.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Oh, hello Mr. statue! You’ll look good on Two-Brains’ island! And your  identical  twin too! I don’t want to break up the family! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

(He then runs into his former henchman, who are wearing security guard uniforms.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Oh, hey, you guys. So, you’re security guards now, huh? Working hard or hardly working? Ha-ha!

Unnamed henchman: Yup. Hey, your shiny new suit really works, huh boss?

Dr. Two-Brains: Uh, look, I’m not your boss. You don’t have to call me that anymore.

Unnamed henchman: Oh. Yeah. (both with a sad expression)

Dr. Two-Brains: (awkwardly) Right, well, gotta go. Mecha-Mouse machine, blast off!

(It powers down again, and Two-Brains once again picks up the manual. He identifies the problem, and tries again.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Right, right, right. Mecha-Mouse machine, blast off! (He manages to take off this time.)

Unnamed henchman: He got away.

Security Manager: Yes, I can see that. I don’t think we’ll be needing your services anymore.

(WordGirl and Huggy are still stumbling around in a daze. She finally gets her wits about her.)

WordGirl: Looks like Two-Brains has a new toy! Huggy? (he falls down)

(Scene: Outside a sports outfitters store. Two workers are advertising in front of it.)

Tobey’s fan: See the golden dance pants! Made from melted-down gold bars!

(Inside the store)

Dr. Two-Brains: Is this it? Where are the other golden dance pants? It’s two-for-one week!

Employee: (with a New York accent) There’s a pair of pants right there, I mean, a pair means two!

Dr. Two-Brains: Then there should be two  identical  pairs of golden dance pants, shouldn’t there?

Employee: I don’t know, man, that’s all I got.

Dr. Two-Brains: Oh, fine! (picks up the gold pants and heads for the exit, passing a pair of check-out ladies who look alike.) I won’t need a bag! (whispering) I’m trying to be more environmental. Ha-ha-ha-ha!

(WordGirl and Huggy arrive.)

WordGirl: Not so fast! (She hits the mouse on the head several times, but with no effect.) Still can’t-- make a dent!

Dr. Two-Brains: Let me know when you’re finished.

(Huggy jumps onto the head of the mouse, blocking Two-Brains’ view.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Whoa! Stop! Get off-- you’re messing up the head!

(WordGirl continues trying to pummel the mouse in the stomach. It then gives off some sort of sonic wave, kicking WordGirl and Huggy back.)

Dr. Two-Brains: My suit is unstoppable! (looking down at the manual) I guess I won’t need THIS anymore! (He opens a hatch and tosses it out.)

(As Two-Brains approaches the exit, he once again runs into his former henchmen, now working as security guards for this store. They are both wearing colorful pairs of pants that resemble pajamas.)

Unnamed henchman: Hey…

Dr. Two-Brains: Oh, you two again. Hi. Alright! Well, good luck. Mechanical Muscle Mouse Machine, blast off! (takes off again, and blasts through the room of the building.)

Narrator: Will WordGirl find a way to defeat Dr. Two-Brains?

Narrator’s Brother: Or, is his amazing new suit too powerful?

Narrator: Geez, I hope not!

WordGirl: Hey, come on! I’ll beat that suit. It’s got to have a weakness.

(Huggy notices the discarded manual on the ground next to him. He shows it to WordGirl.)

WordGirl: Good work, Captain Huggy Face! This is exactly the break we needed! (takes off)

(Meanwhile, the store employee is talking to the henchmen.)

Employee: My golden dance pants! My store! You two are fired! Turn in your pants!

Unnamed henchman: (disappointed) Oh.

(Scene: WordGirl’s secret spaceship hideout. Huggy is tearing out pages from the manual, and feeding them into the computer.)

WordGirl: Hm, wow! This suit has some  astonishing  powers.

(Huggy chatters.)

WordGirl:  Astonish ? Oh, well, it means to fill with wonder or amazement. It also means really surprised. Remember everyone’s face in the museum when they first saw Two-Brains and his Mecha suit?

(Huggy make an astonished face.)

WordGirl: Right, those people were  astonished . Mm, back to the Mecha suit! Looks like… Yes! Yes! Okay, here’s the plan--

Narrator: Have WordGirl and Captain Huggy Face discovered the flaw in Dr. Two-Brains’ Mechanized Muscle Mouse Machine? Will they stop Dr. Two-Brains before he gets his very own private island?

Narrator’s Brother: Or… will Two-Brain Island become the center of crime and evil for all eternity?

WordGirl: (chuckles) Ask your brother who usually wins the battles on this show, buddy.

Narrator’s Brother: Ah. Kids grow up so fast these days.

(Scene: Outside of another store. Mecha-Mouse is moving down the sidewalk carrying a load of cash.)

Narrator: Later, at the Private Island store…

Dr. Two-Brains: My  identical  private islands will become the center of crime and evil for all eternity! At least that’s what a little narrator told me.

(Suddenly he hears the voice of his former henchman. He and Charlie are now working for the island store.)

Unnamed henchman: Get your private islands! Buy one island, get a second  identical  island free!

(They bump into the Mecha-Mouse.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Ah, you again! Would you stop following me?!

Unnamed henchman: But we work here!

Dr. Two-Brains: That’s what YOU think! (He knocks off their advertising boards.) Now, off you go! Shoo! Shoo! Go!

(WordGirl arrives.)

WordGirl: Not so fast, Two-Brains!

Dr. Two-Brains: Again? I’m  astonished , WordGirl. You insist on repeating the  identical  situation over and over and over!

WordGirl: You know, you’re right? You’re just too powerful now.

Dr. Two-Brains: I am? Huh! You’re actually complimenting me. I’m  astonished !

(From behind him, Huggy jumps onto the back of the Mecha-Mouse suit. He opens a panel, exposing a big red button.)

WordGirl: Well, that suit just proves what a brilliant scientist you are.

Dr. Two-Brains: I like to think I add something extra. Natural flair--

(Huggy pushes the red button.)

WordGirl: Yeah yeah, you’re great, we get it. So, uh, me being a superhero and all, I feel like I should at least try to stop you one last time.

Dr. Two-Brains: Oh, if you must. Prepare to smell defeat, WordGirl! Super limberger stink spray!

(He punches in the code, but the panel inside the suit starts flashing red.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Something’s wrong, something--

(The Mecha-Mouse starts shaking violently Smoke comes out of it, and the suit explodes. Two-Brains is sitting on the sidewalk next to what remains of the suit.)

Dr. Two-Brains: What just happened?

WordGirl: We discovered a weakness that could trigger a Mecha-suit meltdown! (points to a diagram) That big red self-destruct button just right on your back.

Dr. Two-Brains: You noticed that, did you?

WordGirl: I’m  astonished  it was so easy.

Dr. Two-Brains: I KNEW I shouldn’t have put that on there! Oh well, live and learn, I guess. See ya around!

WordGirl: Uh, you’re going to jail, actually.

Dr. Two-Brains: Jail? NO!

(Sees his former henchman getting on a bus across the street.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Hey, henchmen! Guys! (runs up to the windows of the bus where they are sitting) How’s it going?

Unnamed henchman: Not so great. You just got us fired again.

Dr. Two-Brains: Good, good, great, glad to hear it! So, hey, how about you help me take on WordGirl, and Captain Hoosywnks? For old time sake, doesn’t that sound like fun?

Unnamed henchman: Sorry, pal. We gotta get to a job interview.

Dr. Two-Brains: Guys? Guys, please! PLEASE!

Unnamed henchman: See ya when you get out of jail! (The bus starts moving.)

(WordGirl flies over to Two-Brains.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Well, I guess I deserved that.

WordGirl: Yep. Shall we go?

Narrator’s Brother: So ends the  astonishing  story of a man and his machine. Brought to justice by a girl and her monkey.

WordGirl: Wow. That was actually pretty good!

Narrator: It was beautiful. So, you back off to Hollywood?

Narrator’s Brother: Yeah.

Narrator: Well, thanks for visiting, I just gotta finish up here. Join us soon for another  astonishing  episode of-- (in a high raspy voice) WordGirl! Ugh… Hmph, I can do a lot better than that, I promise.

Narrator’s Brother: Please, allow me. Join us soon for another  astonishing  episode of WordGirl.