Son of the Mask

00:00:14	( dramatic orchestrated music plays ) ( thunder rumbling ) Man: The mifulu represent a fascinating example of failed culture. 00:00:58	The people of the mifulu communicated entirely in rhyme, although that's actually less impressive than it sounds, because their language only contained one vowel. 00:01:10	Also, if you've noticed, the only artifacts we've been able to unearth are primitive musical instruments. 00:01:17	The mifulus had plenty of drums, guitars, harmonicas and the like, but no weapons or tools. 00:01:24	So, in essence, they had rhythm, they had music, but they had no hammers and spears, so they died. 00:01:32	In any case, this brings us to the final room of the tour and my personal favorite-- - the hall of norse mythology. 00:01:39	-( thunder crashing ) This is odin, chief divinity of the entire norse pantheon-- "the allfather" as he's called-- and these paintings depict some of odin's many sons. 00:01:53	That is thor, god of thunder, with his mighty hammer. 00:01:57	And this is balder, god of beauty. 00:02:00	Who's that ugly guy? 00:02:01	Oh, I was just about to get to him. 00:02:04	That's loki, norse god of mischief. 00:02:06	He was also known " -( ghostly scream ) - As the youngest son of odin, loki was the black sheep of the norse mythological family. 00:02:14	His constant mischievous pranks were an endless source of embarrassment to his father and his siblings. 00:02:20	He was, in other words, a bratty little brother. 00:02:23	( all chuckle ) And loki's ultimate tool of mischief was this, the mask which he created and tossed down to earth thousands of years ago to create mayhem among the mortals. 00:02:32	For, according to legend, the wearer of the mask is imbued with the powers of loki himself. 00:02:39	- Is that true? 00:02:39	- No, of course not. 00:02:41	- If it were, I'd be wearing it myself. 00:02:42	- ( all chuckle ) No, no, it's textbook mythical allegory. 00:02:47	Loki represents the "id," the suppressed parts of ourselves, and the mask is the tool which unleashes the id. 00:02:52	I go into this very topic in my critically acclaimed book. 00:02:56	Now, of all the aesir gods-- excuse me, sir. 00:02:59	Please don't touch the mask display. 00:03:02	Of all the aesir gods, loki was the only one who could shape shift-- change his form, even turn himself into a woman. 00:03:09	! man alive, lock up your sons and daughters -around that twisted piece of fruitcake, hey, doc? 00:03:13	- ( all laugh ) Well, I guess that's one way of putting it. 00:03:18	Anyway, loki brought nothing but shame to odin and his ilk. 00:03:22	In fact, loki was such an unruly child that odin ultimately locked him up in chains far beneath the earth. 00:03:29	( yells ) He didnot! 00:03:38	( roaring ) - Good god! 00:03:55	- And don't you forget it! 00:03:59	( screaming ) Apparently, you do not agree with my theories. 00:04:11	Finally! 00:04:15	- This is a fake! 00:04:16	- Yes, but it's a good fake. 00:04:20	sir, that is museum property. 00:04:23	Oh, I'm sorry. 00:04:24	Let me replace it. 00:04:28	What-- what are-- what are you doing? 00:04:30	Perhaps I should inform you I suffer from vertigo and I have a lawyer. 00:04:37	Hello? 00:04:40	Where's my body? 00:04:41	Come get me. 00:04:42	- ( chuckles ) Yeah. oh yeah. 00:04:43	- Hold it right there! 00:04:47	( growls ) I don't like it here. 00:05:00	Thanks for dropping by. 00:05:02	- Dropping? 00:05:02	- Bye. 00:05:05	( officers scream, thud ) ( toots ) .. my... 00:05:14	! 00:05:19	( birds twittering ) Woman: Who's a happy baby? 00:06:10	Who's a happy baby? 00:06:10	( talks baby talk ) Aw, clare, he's amazing. 00:06:14	Honey, look at him. 00:06:16	They said he's very alert for his age. 00:06:19	He's going to be a genius just like his brothers and sisters. 00:06:22	- Little tommy's starting .. 00:06:23	-( thuds ) And clancy just took his first potty poop. 00:06:28	honey, he just took his first poop. 00:06:31	Good poop, clancy! 00:06:33	( yelling ) - ( groans ) - Whoa, captain underpants, watch your aim. 00:06:39	He's gonna need those. 00:06:42	- You okay? 00:06:42	- Yup. 00:06:44	- ( chuckles ) - Here. mm-hmm. 00:06:47	So, when are you two gonna have one for yourselves? 00:06:52	.. 00:06:56	-( bell dinging ) - It's a boy. 00:06:58	- ( baby crying ) - And a girl! 00:07:02	- Twins? 00:07:02	- And another boy! 00:07:06	- Girl. 00:07:06	- Boy. 00:07:08	- Girl. 00:07:08	- Boy. 00:07:09	Nurses: .. 00:07:17	- Tim! 00:07:17	- ( gasps ) ( electronic game beeps ) Whew. 00:07:22	Okay, I'm just gonna say it. 00:07:25	That was flat out embarrassing. 00:07:26	The mere mention of the word "baby" and your throat seizes up like you swallowed drano. 00:07:31	After seeing those kids, drano sounds like agoodoption. 00:07:34	- ( giggles ) -( game vehicle crashes ) .. 00:07:37	- Yeah? 00:07:38	If we have a baby, you'll have someone you can play video games with. 00:07:42	Mm-hmm. 00:07:45	- Hey! 00:07:45	- You'll have someone you canrelateto. 00:07:48	- Okay, honey, look. 00:07:49	I know you're upset, okay? 00:07:49	-Mmm. 00:07:51	- But can I ask you one question? 00:07:52	- What? 00:07:56	Who's a fish? 00:07:56	Who's afish? 00:07:58	Tim, stop it. 00:07:59	I mean it. 00:08:00	Look, babe, who's a turkey? 00:08:03	Bawk bawk bawk bawkbawk! 00:08:04	- I'm serious! 00:08:05	- Who's a rabid dog? 00:08:08	( growls ) Ow! 00:08:15	-Who's hannibal the cannibal? 00:08:16	-Stop it. 00:08:17	-Jeez, babe. 00:08:17	-Okay, I'm driving-- driving-- driving here! 00:08:28	- Ugh. 00:08:29	- Honey, slow down. 00:08:30	You know I can't run and apologize at the same time. 00:08:32	Come on, tonya. 00:08:32	I'm not saying I don't want to have a baby. 00:08:35	I'm just saying I don't want to have a baby right now. 00:08:39	So why not? 00:08:39	Why not now? 00:08:43	- Because. 00:08:43	- Ugh. 00:08:45	Wha-- babe! 00:08:47	Tonya! 00:08:47	Ton-ton-- ( sighs ) - Hey, otis. 00:08:54	- ( whimpers ) - You got room in your doghouse? 00:08:56	- ( barks ) Here you go. 00:09:04	Here you go. yeah! 00:09:05	Come on. come on. 00:09:06	Come on. come on. 00:09:09	- Up. 00:09:09	- ( barking ) ( laughs ) You're good, aren't you? 00:09:13	Now, get in the hole. 00:09:18	Tretiak's in the net for the soviets. 00:09:20	Paul henderson's out of the penalty box. 00:09:22	He's on the break! 00:09:22	He shoots! 00:09:25	Oh, what a save! 00:09:27	What a comeback! 00:09:27	free beef jerky for everybody! 00:09:31	And the ice is being pelted with kibbles 'n bits. 00:09:37	What's this? 00:09:38	- Now, otis, how many times have I told you? 00:09:39	-( querying growl ) If you're gonna steal something, steal something with a little value. 00:09:46	That's what we're looking for. 00:09:47	Get up here, come on. 00:09:49	Come here. 00:09:50	( moans ) Thanks, pal. 00:09:52	Your kissing is getting a lot better. 00:09:57	- You don't want a baby right now, do you? 00:09:58	- ( whimpers ) ( clears throat ) Hesaid it. 00:10:06	Mmm. 00:10:13	( shouting ) Loki! 00:10:22	( shout continues ) Dad? 00:10:29	I-i mean, oh, masterful odin, is that you? 00:10:33	Have you found your mask, loki? 00:10:36	I foundamask, but as it turns out, - it was a fake. 00:10:39	- Why are you relaxing on this beach? 00:10:41	- I'm just taking afew moments reprieve from my-- - nonsense! 00:10:45	That mask has caused enough mischief and malfeasance among the mortals. 00:10:49	I curse the day you created that thing. 00:10:52	Why don't you just use that all-seeing eye of yours - andtellme where it is? 00:10:55	- This is your mess and youwillclean it up! 00:10:59	You're a god! 00:10:59	Now start acting like one! 00:11:02	Now, find that mask before I open up a can of lightning on you! 00:11:14	( knocks ) Do you need anything while I'm out? 00:11:16	I'm just gonna go make a baby with the neighbor. 00:11:19	- Honey, come here. 00:11:19	- What? 00:11:21	look at all this stuff. 00:11:26	I've been trying to do this for 10 years of my life, creating these shows and-- ( sighs ) I just need more time. 00:11:36	Okay, I get it, okay? 00:11:40	You want your own show, and I want you to have your own show. 00:11:45	You're so good! 00:11:49	.. 00:11:51	Really, really wanna have a baby. 00:11:58	So, what do we do? 00:11:59	I want our child to be proud of us, both of us. 00:12:04	And if somebody asks that child, "hey, what does " he's gonna say, "oh, she's the managing " " when they say, "what " they'll say, "he's a-- he's a--" hey, boys and girls. 00:12:18	I'm torpedo tortoise! 00:12:21	♪ Here at animagine, your dreams come true ♪ 00:12:24	♪ there's so much fun here for me and you ♪ 00:12:27	♪ animagine in the morning, animagine at night ♪ 00:12:31	♪ if watching cartoons is wrong ♪ 00:12:33	♪ I don't want ♪ 00:12:38	and here's one for you. 00:12:38	Woman: They want to see us there at 4:00 tomorrow. 00:12:41	Halloween party's tomorrow night, homes. 00:12:43	- Got a costume? 00:12:44	- No. 00:12:46	Hey, maybe you could go as a turtle. 00:12:50	Thanks, chad. 00:12:52	I can't believe chad got promoted again. 00:12:55	When the executives look at me, all they see is a tortoise. 00:12:58	Hey man, you want things to change, you gotta make 'em change. 00:13:01	-You ever pitch to the top man himself? 00:13:02	- Daniel moss? hell no. 00:13:06	Oh my god. 00:13:06	He never eats lunch down here. 00:13:09	He's too busy being an animation god! 00:13:11	Then it's fate, man. 00:13:11	You got to go over there and say, "yo, I am tim avery and I've been slugging away in this costume for six months now and I got an idea for a show and you " be aggressive, man. 00:13:20	If a bug bites you, bite him back! 00:13:23	- Oh, you mean like you have with sylvia? 00:13:23	- Shut up. 00:13:27	You know, maybe I should. 00:13:29	- Should what? 00:13:29	- Just walk up to daniel. 00:13:31	- I mean, he's just a guy, right? 00:13:32	- Right. 00:13:33	- What do I have to lose? 00:13:34	- You got nothing to lose, man! 00:13:38	- I'm gonna do it. 00:13:39	- Are you crazy? 00:13:49	- Man:YOU'RE KIDDING. 00:13:50	- Hey, torpedo tortoise. 00:13:53	Hi. 00:13:57	Something I can do for you? 00:13:59	.. 00:14:02	Actually, yes. 00:14:02	Yes, you can. 00:14:04	Um, see I've been in the turtle suit for a while now, but, uh, I'm a trained animator. 00:14:11	I went to school and everything, and, uhm, I got an idea for a show that, uh, you gotta hear. 00:14:17	Cool. 00:14:17	Lay it on me. 00:14:20	Now? 00:14:22	So what did he say? 00:14:23	That my ideas lacked spark, but the door was always open. 00:14:27	Well, that's a good thing. 00:14:28	it's always open so he can push guys like me out of it. 00:14:35	-( Otis panting ) -( dog collar jingling ) Tim: Come on, otis. 00:14:40	Otis. come on. 00:14:42	Come on, boy. 00:14:42	Come on, otis. 00:14:44	Thank you, otis. 00:15:03	( giggles ) ( sighs ) You're so sweet and thoughtful. 00:15:13	Which is why you'd make such a great dad. 00:15:17	- What are you wearing? 00:15:17	- Oh. 00:15:19	Well, I was gonna go as a werewolf victim, but otis ruined my mask. 00:15:23	Well, honey, you know, we've got so much stuff around here. 00:15:26	I don't know, just-- wear that thing. 00:15:29	This? 00:15:32	I can't go as this. 00:15:33	Everyone at animagine always goes all out with their costumes. 00:15:36	.. 00:15:39	Have fun, and when you get home, you can tell me all about it. 00:15:46	( hip-hop music ayin Ready? and action! 00:17:23	Strawberry explosion! 00:17:25	Now that's a blast of flavor! 00:17:27	Enter the danimals video promotion. 00:17:29	Action! 00:17:30	Danimals crush cups! 00:17:32	♪ 00:17:33	you can get the code fromspecially marked danimals. 00:17:35	Or go to danimals.comfor free means of entry. 00:17:37	With your parents'permission post your fun danimals video to be judgedby dylan and cole! 00:17:41	The grand prize isa trip to hollywood. 00:17:43	To hang with us! 00:17:44	Plus 10,000 bucks! 00:17:46	Nice! 00:17:46	Many will enter.few will win. 00:17:48	Danimals. get your blast on! 00:19:44	So lame. 00:19:50	Whoa! 00:19:50	..? 00:19:52	( ominous music playing ) ( grunting ) ( jazz music playing ) ( stretching ) Don't you just lovehalloween? 00:20:41	All: Whoa! 00:20:45	Trick or treat. 00:20:46	Hardy-har. 00:20:47	Let me see your work id, please. 00:20:52	- Id? 00:20:53	- No id, no party. 00:20:55	Where did the wife put that invitation? 00:20:58	-( rattles ) -( fanfare ) Id, not iv. 00:21:04	Excuse me. 00:21:05	My bad. 00:21:06	-( glass shatters ) - Maybe I left it in my other pants. 00:21:12	- Woman:CRAZY! 00:21:12	- Okay. 00:21:15	( soft jazz music playing ) Here's your drink. 00:21:23	- ( grunts ) -( woman laughs ) This party is embarrassing. 00:21:27	Can't we stir things up a little? 00:21:29	- I'm on it. 00:21:30	- Go get 'em. 00:21:42	Who's that green guy? 00:21:43	You'd better cover up, young lady. 00:21:45	You might catch a chest cold. 00:21:47	Ah. 00:21:52	What am I thinking? 00:21:54	Whoa! oh! 00:21:56	Hey! 00:21:56	Oh! 00:21:59	- Men:WHOO! WHOO! 00:21:59	- Ah. 00:22:02	- Jorge. 00:22:02	- Sylvia. 00:22:04	Thank you, god. 00:22:05	- ♪ You're just too ♪ 00:22:06	- let's go. 00:22:10	♪ I can't take my ♪ 00:22:13	- ( crowd booing ) - Boo! boo! 00:22:15	Now hold on. 00:22:15	Where is everybody going? 00:22:17	Whoo! all right. 00:22:18	All right! 00:22:21	- Boo! lame! 00:22:21	- Whoo-hoo! 00:22:23	-♪ Yeah, fringe city ♪ 00:22:24	♪ 00:22:26	-♪ what, what, what ♪ 00:22:26	-♪ this is the part where you dance ♪ 00:22:29	-♪ this is the part where you boogie ♪ 00:22:30	-♪ ooh, ooh, ooh ♪ 00:22:32	-♪ this is the part where you dance ♪ 00:22:33	-♪ uh, uh, uh, uh ♪ 00:22:35	♪ shake your booty, shake your cans like this ♪ 00:22:38	♪ shake your pants, shake-a shake-a ♪ 00:22:39	♪ shake your pants like this, shake your pants ♪ 00:22:42	♪ uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh ♪ 00:22:44	♪ ladies, let me hear you ♪ 00:22:45	♪ you're just too good to be true, yeah, good to be true ♪ 00:22:48	♪ can't take my eyes off of you, I love you, baby ♪ 00:22:50	♪ you feel like heaven to touch, mm-hmm ♪ 00:22:52	♪ I wanna hold you so much, yeah, yeah ♪ 00:22:54	♪ at long last, love has arrived, I thank god I'm alive ♪ 00:22:58	♪ you're too good to be true, can't take my eyes ♪ 00:23:01	- ♪ can't take my eyes off of you, yo ♪ 00:23:02	-♪ what ♪ 00:23:07	( big band music playing ) ♪ Pardon the way that I stare ♪ 00:23:11	♪ no one else who can compare ♪ 00:23:13	♪ the sight of you leaves me weak ♪ 00:23:15	♪ there are no words left to speak ♪ 00:23:18	♪ so if you feel like I feel ♪ 00:23:20	♪ please let me know that it's real ♪ 00:23:22	♪ you're just too good to be true ♪ 00:23:25	♪ can't take my eyes ♪ 00:23:27	( horse whinnies ) ( country music playing ) ♪ 00:23:33	- yee-haw! 00:23:33	-♪ Don't bring me down, ♪ 00:23:38	- Man: All right! 00:23:38	- ♪ Now that I found you ♪ 00:23:41	♪ stay and let me love you ♪ 00:23:43	♪ baby, let me love you ♪ 00:23:46	♪ you're just too good to be true ♪ 00:23:48	♪ can't take my eyes off you ♪ 00:23:49	uc mh ♪ 00:23:55	♪ now at last long, love has arrived ♪ 00:23:56	♪ I thank the lord I'm alive, you're too good to be true ♪ 00:23:59	♪ I can't stop watching you, can't take my eyes off you ♪ 00:24:02	.. good... 00:24:02	.. be... ♪ 00:24:05	( big band music playing ) ♪ I love you, baby, hands in the air ♪ 00:24:14	♪ and if it's quite all right, I need you, baby ♪ 00:24:17	♪ even though you don't care ♪ 00:24:18	♪ to warm those lonely nights I love you, baby♪ 00:24:20	- ♪ all the ladies on the left ♪ 00:24:21	- ( cars honking ) ♪ Trust in me when I say ♪ 00:24:25	♪ shake it, shake it, shake it, shake it, shake it ♪ 00:24:27	- ♪ oh pretty baby ♪ 00:24:28	- ♪ all the fellas on the right ♪ 00:24:30	♪ don't bring me down, I pray ♪ 00:24:32	- ♪ oh, pretty baby ♪ 00:24:32	- ♪ getting freaky on the side ♪ 00:24:34	♪ now that I found you, stay ♪ 00:24:36	♪ and let me ♪ 00:24:39	- jump, jump, jump, jump. 00:24:40	- ♪ Let me love you ♪ 00:24:44	♪ this is the part where you boogie ♪ 00:24:46	♪ this is the part ♪ 00:24:56	( door creaks ) Honey, I'm home. 00:25:01	- ( gasps ) BABE, What's gotten into you? 00:25:02	- Let's find out. 00:25:18	( alarm buzzing ) That was off the chain last night, guru. 00:25:49	You were a whirling dervish of craziness, homes. 00:25:51	Hey, um, did you-- did you use holograms for-- for all that-- that stuff? 00:25:56	Whoa, avery, I didn't know you had it in you, man! 00:25:59	Yeah, well, me neither. 00:26:03	- Tim avery? 00:26:03	- Yeah. 00:26:04	Daniel moss would like to see you in his office. 00:26:07	Do you have a minute? 00:26:12	H dddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddddd ddddddddddddddddNDDO-M-ME-NDWNS. 00:28:52	.. 00:28:54	Or a drill instructorfor a gym teacher. 00:28:56	But at subway restaurants, you get exactly whatyou ask for. 00:29:00	Subway.eat fresh. 00:29:02	E- this has potential. 00:30:08	Come here. 00:30:09	Come here. 00:30:14	This has that spark I was looking for. 00:30:16	I mean, not to be crass about it, but this guy-- this could be a franchise character. 00:30:25	How'd you come up with this? 00:30:29	M-my dog brought it to me. 00:30:31	if we knew where the great ones came from, we'd go there every day, right? 00:30:37	( chuckles ) Yeah. 00:30:41	Listen, I think we could do something with this. 00:30:45	How would you like to move up to the second floor? 00:30:51	( breathless ) Where is it? 00:30:52	Where is it? 00:30:58	( growls ) you know that mask you were chewing on, the wooden one? 00:31:02	Where is it, boy? 00:31:03	- ( whimpers ) - Find it and I'll take you to see venus-- you know, that cute little jack russell you're always trying to jump? 00:31:09	Yes, I think you guys would make a good couple. 00:31:13	I don't know. 00:31:13	I don't speak doberman. 00:31:15	Babe! 00:31:15	I got incredible news! 00:31:17	Really? 00:31:17	I think I do too! 00:31:19	- Really? what? 00:31:20	- Um, you go. 00:31:21	- No, you go. 00:31:22	- Okay, I'm gonna go. 00:31:23	- Babe, let me go. 00:31:23	- Okay, go. 00:31:24	- Guess who got moved up to the second floor? 00:31:25	- ( gasps ) ( both vocalizing hip-hop music ) Oh god, that is so great! 00:31:30	I am so proud of you. 00:31:32	- Oh, then it was meant to be. 00:31:33	- What's meant to be? 00:31:34	What's your news? 00:31:36	I've been feeling really funky all day - and you're not gonna believe this. 00:31:39	- I'm not gonna believe what? 00:31:42	- Tell me! what? what? 00:31:42	.. 00:31:46	- Pregnant. 00:31:46	- Yes! 00:31:48	- ( chuckles nervously ) - ( giggles ) Oh, but how can that be, 'cause we-- that can't be-- we just-- - ( gibbers ) - Who's a fish? 00:31:54	Who's a fish? 00:31:57	Where's there a trashcan? 00:31:57	Where's there a trashcan? 00:32:02	( retches ) - Is that normal? 00:32:10	- No. 00:32:12	And what's worse, it's not covered by insurance. 00:32:18	♪ Baby face ♪ 00:32:21	♪ you've got the cutest little ♪ 00:32:23	♪ 00:32:23	- mm-hmm! 00:32:24	- He goes here, .. 00:32:25	-♪ There's not another one ♪ 00:32:27	-♪ could take your place ♪ 00:32:27	..andbam,in his face. 00:32:28	( chuckles ) -♪ Baby face ♪ 00:32:32	- ( Tim sighs ) ♪ 00:32:33	- honey, that's our baby! 00:32:35	♪ You sure have ♪ 00:32:37	- ( disco music playing ) ♪ 00:32:40	- ( Latin music plays ) -♪ When I play the maracas I go chic-chicky-boom ♪ 00:32:44	♪ chic-chicky-boom ♪ 00:32:46	♪ baby face ♪ 00:32:49	♪ I'm up in heaven ♪ 00:32:50	-♪ when I'm in ♪ 00:32:51	- hello, in there. 00:32:54	- Wow. 00:32:54	- What? 00:32:55	- I-i think my water just broke. 00:32:55	-♪ I didn't need a shove ♪ 00:32:58	-♪ 'cause I just .. ♪ 00:32:59	- really? 00:33:00	- It's a boy. 00:33:00	-♪ With your pretty baby ♪ 00:33:04	♪ pretty baby ♪ 00:33:06	♪ 00:33:10	oh, alvey. 00:33:14	Say hello to your son. 00:33:18	Uh, hello there, son. 00:33:20	I've been waiting to meet you for nine months now. 00:33:27	he's got a killer grip. 00:33:30	But dad counteracts with his pinky of doom. 00:33:33	( vocalizes fight ) Hey, do you know who I am? 00:33:39	I'm your dad. 00:33:45	( shouting ) Loki! 00:33:52	There was a baby born of the mask! 00:34:06	Damn! 00:34:07	! 00:34:09	Sir, y-you're gonna have to pay for that. 00:34:17	The advertisement said they were authentic! 00:34:20	They are authentic. 00:34:21	They're authentic pakistani norse mythology masks. 00:34:28	Okay. 00:34:28	Now let me think. 00:34:30	- What should I turn him into? 00:34:31	- ( grunts ) ( Odin's voice ) Loki! 00:34:41	Dad? 00:34:43	Fool! 00:34:44	What in helveti were you about to do to this shopkeep? 00:34:47	- Nothing, I was just-- - fool! 00:34:49	Don't youdare lie to me. 00:34:51	You know, thor never gave me this kind of trouble. 00:34:54	Okay, here we go again with the thor crap. 00:34:56	Thor, thor, thor. 00:34:56	You know, father, I'm not like thor. 00:34:59	- I'm never gonna be like thor. 00:35:00	- ( grumbles ) I just wish that-- can't you just love me for who I am and not for who I'm not? 00:35:08	I want you to be more like thor! 00:35:11	Now, I've wasted enough time here. 00:35:13	I felt a tremor. 00:35:15	A child has been born of the mask! 00:35:17	a baby's born of the mask, so that sort of makes me kind of like a dad, huh? 00:35:23	- Find it! 00:35:23	- The baby or the mask? 00:35:25	Find the baby and you will find the mask. 00:35:30	Right. 00:35:35	Tim: Tonya, have you seen otis? 00:35:37	He's in his new doghouse! 00:35:40	Who's a happy baby? 00:35:42	Who's a happy baby? 00:35:45	Let's blow up another one. 00:35:48	You like these, huh? 00:35:49	They're pretty! 00:35:51	Honey, honey, honey, just a second ago, he was counting the balloons. 00:35:53	He held up five fingers. 00:35:56	That's great, hon. 00:35:56	I gotta go. 00:35:57	Daniel brought in chad to backstab me-- oh, I mean help me-- and I gotta get to work before he helps me out of a job. 00:36:03	Hey. 00:36:05	What do you think, double a? 00:36:06	Would you watch this, huh? 00:36:07	Hey hon, I know I've asked like a million times, but you happen to see that mask I was looking for, you know the wooden one-- okay, a billion times, why do you need it so badly? 00:36:15	I don't need it. 00:36:16	Who said I need it? 00:36:16	Don't need it. 00:36:19	- Bye. 00:36:19	- Bye. 00:36:21	( whispers ) " bye bye. 00:36:23	Bye bye. here. 00:36:23	You want another one? 00:36:26	Okay, watch, watch, watch. 00:36:28	( coos ) ( growls ) ( buzzing ) Loki's voice: "I want you to be " oh, what a jerk. 00:37:07	Oh hey! 00:37:07	It's my ear, nose and throat guy. 00:37:10	Odin thinks he's so great. 00:37:11	no one even worships you anymore. 00:37:14	I could have been a doctor if the sat weren't so culturally biased. 00:37:17	Now, let's see. 00:37:17	Oh, "infectious diseases," that always cracks me up. 00:37:21	( gasps ) Maternity ward. 00:37:23	Okay, first I find the magic baby, then downstairs to the cafeteria for some jell-o brick. 00:37:27	Who do you have to sting to get some answers in this place? 00:37:32	Bingo! 00:37:33	All right, here we go. 00:37:35	Buckle up. 00:37:36	( chuckles ) Oh, hold on tight. 00:37:37	It's gonna be a bumpy ride. 00:37:39	Okay, baby, this is gonna hurtyou more than it's gonna hurt me. 00:37:42	( laughs ) Ah! 00:37:47	( groans ) ( screams ) .. 00:38:01	UH, JULY 27th. 00:38:04	Babies born on that day. 00:38:06	why are there so many babies born? 00:38:10	( beeps ) - Who are you? 00:38:18	- ( in Loki's voice ) YOU. 00:38:20	- Me? 00:38:21	- Who? 00:38:24	( Alvey crying ) -♪ I thank the lord for the nighttime ♪ 00:38:27	-♪ lord for the nighttime ♪ 00:38:30	-♪ to forget the day ♪ 00:38:30	-♪ forget the day ♪ 00:38:32	-♪ a day of up-- uptight time ♪ 00:38:33	-♪ up-- uptight time ♪ 00:38:35	-♪ baby, chase it away ♪ 00:38:36	-♪ chase it away ♪ 00:38:37	-♪ I get relaxation ♪ 00:38:38	-♪ lord for the nighttime ♪ 00:38:39	-♪ and it's a time to groove ♪ 00:38:40	-♪ a time to groove ♪ 00:38:42	-♪ I thank the lord for the nighttime ♪ 00:38:43	-♪ lord for the nighttime ♪ 00:38:46	♪ I thank the lord for you ♪ 00:38:51	♪ talk about plans, ♪ 00:38:56	- it's okay. 00:38:56	-♪ Nothing ever seems to turn out ♪ 00:38:59	♪ 00:39:00	-it's okay. 00:39:01	- Bottle. 00:39:01	-♪ Seems like just one time ♪ 00:39:06	♪ I'm feeling good ♪ 00:39:08	-♪ I thank the lord for the nighttime ♪ 00:39:09	-♪ lord for the nighttime ♪ 00:39:12	-♪ to forget the day ♪ 00:39:13	.. ♪ 00:39:15	- ( yelps ) - Huh? 00:39:17	- Hmm? 00:39:18	- ( teeth chattering ) -♪ I get relaxation ♪ 00:39:20	-♪ lord for the nighttime ♪ 00:39:21	-♪ and it's a time to groove ♪ 00:39:22	-♪ a time to groove ♪ 00:39:24	-♪ I thank the lord for the nighttime ♪ 00:39:25	-♪ lord for the nighttime ♪ 00:39:27	-♪ baby ♪ 00:39:28	-♪ I thank ♪ 00:39:31	-( baby wailing ) ♪ 00:39:40	- it's okay, baby. 00:39:40	I got him. 00:39:41	- Okay. 00:39:49	( moaning ) ( buzzes ) Tim. 00:40:01	Tim. 00:40:02	- Okay, it's my turn. 00:40:02	it's okay, sweetie. it's okay. 00:40:05	- It's-- it's my turn? 00:40:05	- He's asleep. 00:40:06	He's asleep. 00:40:07	But, baby, can you go in late to work today? 00:40:08	My office just called. 00:40:09	Um, they're sending me to new york for a week. 00:40:13	( Tim screams ) - Hey, where you going? 00:40:19	- I'm-- I'm sorry, daniel. 00:40:21	My wife's gotta go out of town for work. 00:40:22	It's just a week, but I have to take care of the baby. 00:40:26	Hey, you gotta do the kid thing, I understand. 00:40:29	Just unfortunate timing. 00:40:29	The network called, they want to see our green guy thing by the end of the week, but I'll just put chad on it. 00:40:41	- I'm on it. 00:40:41	- What? 00:40:42	I said I need to be home, as in my house, but I didn't say I couldn't work. 00:40:47	Line up the pitch. 00:40:47	I'm on it, and I won't let you down. 00:40:52	try to give it that spark I saw at the halloween party. 00:40:56	- Okay. 00:40:56	-( car honks ) I left all the phone numbers on the refrigerator and you need to give him a bath before he goes to bed, but don't get any water in his ears, 'cause he freaks out a little bit. 00:41:06	Um, and if he gets cranky, you just put him in his car seat and play the baby mozart cd, but don't just pop him in front of the tv; - it's gonna make him stupid. 00:41:12	-( car honks ) Um, uh, if you feel like you're drowning, just go see betty down the street. she has like 10 kids. 00:41:18	do I have to mash his bananas? 00:41:19	- Yeah? 00:41:20	- I-- i-- - okay, you're gonna be fine. 00:41:21	Can I say goodbye? 00:41:24	( coos ) Mommy loves you so much. 00:41:30	Okay. 00:41:30	( laughs ) And mommy loves you too. 00:41:34	- Mommy, I can't do this. 00:41:35	- Huh? you can. 00:41:36	- I can't. 00:41:36	- You can. 00:41:37	- Mommy. honey, take him. 00:41:38	-( car horn honks ) - Bye. 00:41:40	- Honey, take him. 00:41:42	-I love you. 00:41:42	- Honey, take him. 00:41:44	Bye. 00:41:46	Bye. 00:41:49	( screaming ) Okay. 00:41:59	All right, alvey. 00:42:01	Okay. all right. 00:42:01	We're gonna have a good time. 00:42:04	Here we go. 00:42:04	Come on. yes. 00:42:07	Look at the pretty colors. 00:42:11	Oh, look! ah, ee. 00:42:15	Fun, right? 00:42:17	Look at me! 00:42:17	.. happy. 00:42:33	( rooster crows ) Okay. 00:42:38	Okay, buddy, it's just you and me this morning - and we're gonna have fun and gonna play. 00:42:42	-( phone ringing ) You excited? 00:42:45	Okay. 00:42:49	- Hello? 00:42:50	- Man:Hey, buddy. Can you get down here now? 00:42:52	-Daniel's asking for you. 00:42:53	- No, I can't come in right now. 00:42:55	- I'm stuck here with my kid. 00:42:55	-You'd better think of something. 00:42:57	He wants to see your drawings before the pitch on Friday. 00:43:00	I'll do the drawings now and I'll fax 'em over after lunch. 00:43:04	-All right. 00:43:04	-Okay, bye. 00:43:06	Hey, pal. 00:43:08	Daddy's got a teensy-weensy bit of work to do, so can you be a good boy and let him? 00:43:20	( loud flatulence ) ( phone rings ) Hello? 00:43:28	- Honey, hey! 00:43:28	- Hey, hon, how you doin'? 00:43:32	So, how are you and alvey doing? 00:43:35	Oh, we're doing fine. 00:43:35	Yeah, we're doing great. 00:43:37	Two little peas in a pod. 00:43:38	How's your thing going? 00:43:40	Good. Uh, he loved the comps, So now we just gotta rush it all into production. 00:43:44	So, how's Alvey? 00:43:45	Is he eating? 00:43:46	How's he sleeping? 00:43:47	Hold on, hon. 00:43:47	Somebody wants to talk to you. 00:43:49	Hi! How's my little womping wompet? 00:43:52	Oh, I miss you. 00:43:52	I just want to kiss you and kiss you and kiss you! 00:43:56	Okay, hon. 00:43:56	Yeah, he loves you too. 00:43:58	- Hurry home. bye. 00:43:59	- Okay, bye. 00:44:01	Aww. 00:44:03	Well, isn't it great that her work is goingsowell? 00:44:06	- Ma? 00:44:06	ma and her career are just-- - did you say ma? 00:44:13	- Mama. 00:44:14	Oh my god. 00:44:14	You said mama! 00:44:16	Well, can you say "dad" " - mommy. 00:44:22	That's great! 00:44:23	You're doing great! 00:44:25	But come on, da-da ( deep voice ) Mother. 00:44:36	Timmy tyler, are you my mask baby? 00:44:44	( doorbell ringing ) - Yes? 00:44:52	- Good afternoon! 00:44:54	- May I come in? 00:44:54	- Ah-- what a lovely abode. 00:44:56	Oh my, and such a lush carpet. 00:44:58	You're exactly the kind of person the vacuummeister 3000 was invented for! 00:45:02	Well, if I don't clean up, no one will. 00:45:04	That is why youneed the vacuummeister 3000! 00:45:07	- ( gasps ) - It has dual sweeps, durable airpaths, jiggle control, multi-teflon coated filtering and it's built with a direct-drive design that issopowerful, it sucks the dirt off the dirt! 00:45:18	- Is that safe? 00:45:18	- Allow me to demonstrate. 00:45:21	- Oh, don't you need to plug it in? 00:45:22	- No. 00:45:24	( screams ) This is a terrible demonstration. 00:45:35	- ( talks baby talk ) - ( baby giggles ) .. 00:45:39	Ugly thing. 00:45:42	Let's see if you're the one, hmm? 00:45:45	( giggling ) Bend. morph! 00:45:51	Shape shift. 00:45:52	Well, do something for odin's sake. 00:46:51	allthe .. 00:46:54	( bowl chime ) That's us! 00:46:56	How are we ever gonnato get there-- got it! 00:46:58	See you at the bowl,buddy boy! 00:47:01	Oh, really ? 00:47:01	UH-OH! HERE I COME, I AM CinnaMon! 00:47:07	Apple? incoming! 00:47:08	OR CinnaMon?WHO WILL BE... 00:47:11	The winna, mon! 00:47:12	A whole new shape for yourfavorite cinnamon-y .. 00:47:14	That's part ofa nutritious breakfast. 00:47:16	YOU CAN JOIN THE RACE,ONLY AT applejacks.com. 00:47:18	ASK PARENTS PERMISSION. xBEAT YOU THERE! 00:48:40	Announcer: Good nutrition can lead to great things. 00:48:42	Find out how a healthy lifestylecan help your child succeed. 00:49:45	No! 00:49:45	( sighs ) I think it's time to introduceyou to man's best friend. 00:49:51	- And I don't mean you, otis. 00:49:51	- ( whimpers ) Okay. 00:49:56	Mommy doesn't want me to do this, but what mommy doesn't know won't hurt her. 00:50:00	- Man:...sour cream and onion... 00:50:01	- Oh, look. 00:50:07	( man laughs on TV ) Barney: Hey, wait a minute. 00:50:10	Cartoon men: We don't like your attitude! 00:50:12	- Keep an eye on him, will ya? 00:50:13	- ( whimpers ) ( Alvey cooing ) - Barney: Look at Bam Bam. 00:50:21	- ( talks baby talk ) Bam! Bam! 00:50:24	Bam! Bam! Bam! 00:50:26	Betty: Bam Bam looks miserable without Pebbles. 00:50:36	Bam. 00:50:55	( snoring softly ) ( maniacal laughing ) Bam, bam, bam. 00:51:20	( whimpers ) ( sniffing ) ( salsa music plays ) ( screams ) ( grunting ) ( screams ) ( raspy growl ) ( snarled ) Smoking! 00:52:01	( croaks ) ♪ Hello, my baby, hello, my honey ♪ 00:52:09	♪ Hello, my ragtime gal ♪ 00:52:11	♪ Send me a kiss by wire ♪ 00:52:14	♪ Baby, my heart's on fire ♪ 00:52:16	♪ If you refuse me, honey, you'll lose me ♪ 00:52:19	♪ Then you'll be left alone, oh, baby, telephone ♪ 00:52:22	♪ And tell me I'm your own. ♪ 00:52:28	♪ Everybody do the Michigan rag ♪ 00:52:30	♪ Every Mame and Jane and Ruth... ♪ 00:52:34	( silent ) ♪ Stomp, romp, pomp the Michigan ♪ 00:52:38	♪ Jump, clump, pump the Michigan rag ♪ 00:52:41	♪ That lovin' rag! ♪ 00:52:48	( croaks ) ♪ Please don't talk about me when I'm gone ♪ 00:53:01	♪ Oh, honey ♪ 00:53:02	♪ Though our friendship ceases from now on. ♪ 00:53:09	( screams ) ( snarls ) ( baby giggles ) ( giggles echo ) ( "Star-Spangled Banner" playing ) I don't know how. 00:53:49	I don't know which end is up. 00:53:52	I'm running on fumes. 00:53:54	Yeah. 00:53:55	Yeah. 00:54:00	I don't know. 00:54:02	Yeah, I've still got the kid. 00:54:05	Oh god, you have no idea. 00:54:07	Man, they justsuck the life out of you. 00:54:10	I don't know what I'm gonna do with him. 00:54:11	I think I may be on to something for my pitch, though. 00:54:15	I don't know, it's just-- ♪ hello, my baby, hello, my honey ♪ 00:54:21	♪ hello, my ragtime gal ♪ 00:54:23	♪ send me a kiss by wire ♪ 00:54:26	♪ baby, my heart's on fire ♪ 00:54:28	- ♪ if you refuse me, honey, you lose me ♪ 00:54:29	- ( shrieks ) ♪ Then you'll be left alone, oh, baby, telephone ♪ 00:54:34	♪ and tell me ♪ 00:54:37	- ( whoops ) - ( screaming ) ( laughs ) Yow! ooh! 00:55:04	Hi, 911? 00:55:04	I already told you. 00:55:06	My son is bouncing off the walls! 00:55:08	Yes, off the walls, the couch, andthe ceiling. 00:55:11	! 00:55:14	♪ Everybody do the michigan rag ♪ 00:55:16	♪ everybody likes the michigan rag ♪ 00:55:19	♪ stomp, romp, pomp the michigan ♪ 00:55:21	-♪ jump, clump, pump ♪ 00:55:22	- betty! 00:55:24	♪ Everybody do the michigan rag ♪ 00:55:27	♪ everybody likes the michigan rag ♪ 00:55:31	♪ 00:55:33	don't stop, little-- - yeah? 00:55:35	- Betty! 00:55:37	- ( giggles ) - I need your help. 00:55:39	Tim, what's wrong? 00:55:41	Uh, uh, well, tonya said if I ever needed-- you know-- oh, uh, well, if any-- if I saw anything weird. 00:55:45	It's alvey. it's alvey. 00:55:46	It was alvey. see? 00:55:48	He was-- he was bouncing and he-- he did the woody laugh, .. 00:55:52	( imitates Woody Woodpecker ) And he was singing. 00:55:56	Well, lots of babies his age sing. 00:55:59	Vaudeville? 00:56:01	Okay, I'll show you. 00:56:04	Okay, okay. 00:56:04	Here we go. 00:56:06	- ( coos ) - Go on. sing. 00:56:11	Go on, alvey. 00:56:16	Do it. 00:56:18	Do it. 00:56:18	Sing, damn it! 00:56:18	- Tim! 00:56:20	- He's a baby. 00:56:20	- Exactly my point. 00:59:40	t ( doorbell rings ) I'm here to unclog your throne. 01:00:19	- ( thuds ) - ( muffled groan ) Oh, jason kemperbee, be my baby. 01:00:27	- ( coos ) - Come on. 01:00:29	Hook me up. 01:00:30	Show me the magic. 01:00:33	( wailing ) -( Alvey cooing ) - Alvey. 01:00:43	Put that down. 01:00:44	That's mommy and daddy's. 01:00:47	Please put the fax machine down. 01:00:55	Want some juice? 01:00:55	Here, want some juice? 01:00:58	It's okay. 01:00:58	Here you go, alvey. 01:00:59	Have some juice. 01:01:01	Yeah, you like juice. 01:01:04	See, alvey? 01:01:04	Daddy's not gonna hurt you. 01:01:07	Whoa! hey! 01:01:07	Hey! hey! 01:01:09	No! hey! hey! ah! 01:01:12	Hey! hey! hey! 01:01:13	- ( grunting ) - Bam! bam! bam! 01:01:14	Bam! bam! 01:01:17	( Tim screams ) -( rattling ) - ( Tim whimpers ) Alvey: Rattle. 01:01:27	( grunts ) ( Alvey coos ) ( wheezy laughing ) ( mimics explosion ) ( snarled ) Aww, poor baby. 01:02:06	( laughing ) Huh? oh! 01:02:16	( hissing ) Uh-oh. 01:02:24	( groaning ) ( high-pitched bark ) ( whimpering ) ♪ If they could see me now ♪ 01:02:46	♪ that little gang of mine ♪ 01:02:49	♪ eatin' fancy chow ♪ 01:02:51	♪ and drinkin' fancy wine ♪ 01:02:54	♪ all I can say is, "wow" ♪ 01:02:56	-♪ look at where I am ♪ 01:02:57	- ( wheezy chuckle ) ♪ 01:03:01	♪ right in a pot of jam ♪ 01:03:03	♪ what a setup ♪ 01:03:06	♪ holy cow ♪ 01:03:08	♪ never believe it ♪ 01:03:10	♪ if my friends could see me now ♪ 01:03:11	- ( wheezy chuckling ) -♪ Lord, if they could ♪ 01:03:15	( growls ) ( honks ) ( doorbell rings ) - Yes? 01:03:27	would you like some thin chocolate? 01:03:35	( dramatic music playing on TV ) -( zaps ) -( male cries out ) Yeah, you can run, but you can't hide! 01:03:44	( screams ) Electronic voice: Transformers. 01:03:48	( chuckles nervously ) Alvey? 01:03:52	You-- you wouldn't do that to da-da, would you? 01:03:55	I'm your dad. 01:03:57	C-can you say "dad"? 01:03:59	( chuckles ) "Da-da"? 01:04:04	( deep voice ) Madre. 01:04:08	This is too much too handle. 01:04:10	I mean, this is insanity. 01:04:12	- Dancing? 01:04:12	-( raspy laughing ) ( disbelief ) No. no. 01:04:25	Shh. 01:04:28	( chuckles ) ( thuds ) ( classical instrumental music playing ) Fire! 01:04:39	Bull's-eye! 01:04:41	- ( chuckling ) - ( squeaking ) Hmm? 01:04:52	Here we are by the baby. 01:05:06	( Otis humming ) ( chuckling ) Oh, yeah. 01:05:18	Who's the dog? 01:05:20	Who's the big dog-- ( yelps ) ( barking frantically ) ( groans ) - ( Otis screaming ) - Whoa! 01:06:19	( horn blares ) Mommy! 01:06:45	( yelps ) I surrender. 01:07:20	- ( brakes screech ) - ( toy squeaks ) Bye-bye. 01:07:33	( classical instrumental music playing ) - Oh, shoot. 01:07:39	- ( giggles ) Oh! 01:07:56	Stop it! 01:07:57	This is insane! 01:08:00	Point it down! 01:08:08	- All done? 01:08:08	- Hmm. 01:08:26	( doorbell rings ) - Hey, I'm rod. 01:08:30	- Get in here! 01:08:32	Okay. 01:08:34	Uh, take a look atthis. 01:08:37	Hey, what a cute little baby. 01:08:39	- Oh, of course! 01:08:39	- Mind if I take a look at him? 01:08:41	No, go ahead. 01:08:41	I don't care. 01:08:45	Come on. 01:08:45	Do something crazy. 01:08:47	Yeah, do something crazy! 01:08:48	Crap! huh-uh, huh-uh. 01:08:49	( mumbling ) this isn't the right one either. 01:08:56	Hey! 01:08:56	What are you doing? 01:08:58	Uh, I left your package in the foyer. 01:09:04	Do I have a package? okay. 01:09:04	( mumbling ) Oh well. 01:09:13	( sighs, laughs ) What happened? 01:09:23	Youdid this to me. 01:09:23	I know what you're doing. 01:09:28	You're trying to drive me crazy. 01:09:30	You're a cunning little mastermind who will stop at nothinguntil I go - completely insane. 01:09:35	- ( coos ) Well, come on. 01:09:40	- Startdancingagain. 01:09:40	- ( giggles ) Startscrewing with my mind! 01:09:50	Maybe I am just going crazy. 01:09:52	Tim's voice: Maybe I am just going crazy. 01:09:54	Maybe I am just going crazy. 01:09:57	Maybe I am just going crazy. 01:09:58	- Maybe I am just going-- - ( both scream ) That's it, buddy. 01:10:20	First I'm taking you to a pediatrician, then I'm taking you to an exorcist. 01:10:27	( clicking pops ) Tim: ! 01:10:39	Oh my g-- my son is the devil. 01:10:41	My son is the devil. 01:10:41	( whimpers ) Oh my odin, it is him. 01:10:49	Tim: We're just going to have a nice little drive, while daddy has a nervous breakdown. 01:10:55	Answering machine voice: Please leave a message. 01:10:57	Tonya, it's betty. 01:10:58	You said I should keep an eye out and call you if there are any problems? 01:11:02	I think there's a problem. 01:11:18	- ( clangs ) - No parking there. 01:11:21	That's a handicapped zone! 01:11:24	Hey! sir? 01:11:31	Hey, wait! 01:11:34	Stop! you! 01:11:36	HEY! ( grunts ) What is it? 01:11:43	- Ah! 01:11:43	- Okay, where is the mask? 01:11:45	- What? 01:11:45	- The mask. my mask. 01:11:46	Where is it? 01:11:47	- What are you talking about? who are you? 01:11:48	- I am loki, god of mischief. 01:11:51	Yeah, and I'm tim, god of crazy babyland. 01:11:52	Will you get out of the way? 01:11:54	That baby is born of the mask-- my mask. 01:11:55	! 01:11:56	- Born of the mask-- what? 01:11:59	Oh, so that explains why he could pee like that! 01:12:04	But wait a minute. 01:12:04	This is my baby. 01:12:06	I don't care about that. 01:12:07	Just give me my mask! 01:12:09	- I don't know where it is. 01:12:09	- Oh really? 01:12:11	Maybethiswill jog your memory! 01:12:15	( gasps ) - ( Odin's voice ) ! 01:12:17	! 01:12:19	you've left me no other choice. 01:12:21	I don't have time for this. 01:12:22	Look, dad, there's balder. 01:13:27	get the show ♪ all that glitters is gold ♪ 01:13:35	( music stops ) ( laughter ) .. 01:13:39	IN your McDonald ♪ ba da ba ba ba ♪ 01:14:42	ready? and action! 01:14:43	Strawberry explosion! 01:14:45	Now that's a blast of flavor! 01:14:47	Enter the danimals video promotion. 01:14:50	Action! 01:14:51	Danimals crush cups! 01:14:53	♪ 01:14:54	you can get the code fromspecially marked danimals. 01:14:55	Or go to danimals.comfor free means of entry. 01:14:58	With your parents'permission post your fun danimals video to be judgedby dylan and cole! 01:15:01	The grand prize isa trip to hollywood. 01:15:04	To hang with us! 01:15:05	Plus 10,000 bucks! 01:15:06	Nice! 01:15:07	Many will enter.few will win. 01:15:08	Danimals. get your blast on! 01:16:12	THE MOST IMPORTANT PARTOF a McDonald's happy .. 01:16:23	♪ ba da ba ba ba ♪ 01:16:36	I think my dog ate it. 01:16:38	That is the oldest excuse in the book, and I've read somereally, really old books. 01:16:44	But if you want .. 01:16:48	So be it. 01:16:55	( gasps ) Oh, you're good. 01:17:17	- Whoa. 01:17:17	- Yeah. 01:17:22	You really are a chip off the old block. 01:17:23	( clicks tongue ) But I don't have time prepare to feel my true power! 01:17:39	( Odin's voice ) Loki! 01:17:47	You have defied me for the last time. 01:17:52	I've had it up to here with you! 01:17:53	Dad, please listen to me. 01:17:54	You're holding the baby. 01:17:56	Silence! 01:17:56	You have left me no choice. 01:18:00	- Listen, listen-- - you are hereby stripped of your immortal powers and forever banished to the land of mortals. 01:18:08	No! please, hear me out. 01:18:09	That baby-- - ( growls ) - ( Loki screaming ) - ( groans ) - ( giggles ) - ( sizzles ) - Whoa. 01:18:38	( screaming ) - Pretty. 01:18:44	- Whoa. 01:18:46	WHOA. ( grunts ) ( cell phone rings ) - Hello? 01:18:51	- Jorge:Where the hell are you, homes? 01:18:53	Your pitch meeting is starting right now. 01:18:56	Um, I just met green. 01:18:58	- Loki. 01:18:59	-Snap out of it. 01:19:01	Where are you? 01:19:01	I'll pick you up. 01:19:08	What's the deal, tim? 01:19:09	I get you a network pitch, and you repay me by showing up 20 minutes late looking like an escaped mental patient? 01:19:15	And with a kid? 01:19:17	- Huh? 01:19:17	- ( clears throat ) This is tim avery. 01:19:21	He created the character, so why don't I just let him tell you more about it? 01:19:26	Tim? 01:19:35	Tim? 01:19:41	Guys, I could walk. 01:19:42	I-i guess he didn't like the pitch. 01:19:45	I just-- I wanna get all my stuff. 01:19:50	-( answering machine beeps ) - Tonya:Tim? 01:19:53	Pick up the phone! 01:19:55	Tim! 01:19:56	Betty just called. 01:19:57	She's completely freaked out! 01:19:58	Oh, God. 01:19:59	Call me thesecond you get this message. 01:20:07	Tim on phone: Hey, it's me. 01:20:09	Uh, got your message. 01:20:10	Well, things are really great here. 01:20:12	Uh, me and Alvey got chased by a guy named Loki. 01:20:17	Well, that's not important. 01:20:20	I pitched, uh, my show today, .. 01:20:25	I got fired. 01:20:30	Yeah. 01:20:32	.. 01:20:34	But alvey pooped, .. 01:20:40	And alvey saved me. 01:20:43	It was amazing. 01:20:46	But, uh, uh, the main thing is, uh, we're totally fine. 01:20:48	Everything's great. 01:20:50	Um, better than fine, actually. 01:20:53	Alvey's great. 01:20:55	I love you. 01:20:57	Okay, bye. 01:21:05	-( ukulele playing softly ) -( man vocalizing music ) ♪ I, well, I see trees of green ♪ 01:21:18	♪ and red roses too ♪ 01:21:20	♪ I'll watch them bloom for me and you ♪ 01:21:25	♪ and I think to myself ♪ 01:21:29	♪ what a wonderful world ♪ 01:21:36	♪ I hear babies cry and I watch them grow ♪ 01:21:42	♪ they'll learn much more than we'll know ♪ 01:21:48	♪ and I think to myself ♪ 01:21:51	♪ 01:22:00	( vocalizing music ) ( whines softly ) ( crashes ) .. 01:23:47	With my kid cuisine magicalcheese stuffed crust pizza! 01:23:50	Find the hidden cheesein every bite of crust. 01:23:52	Like this! you made it disappear! 01:23:55	What about mine? 01:23:56	Now you see it,now you don't. 01:23:57	Mealtime is funtime,with kid cuisine! 01:24:16	You didn't train the dogto wake you up extra or beg for a closetfull of hand-me-downs. 01:24:20	.. 01:24:22	Or a drill instructorfor a gym teacher. 01:24:25	But at subway restaurants, you get exactly whatyou ask for. 01:24:28	Subway.eat fresh. 01:25:32	(kids giggling) (announcer)RESPECT THE POUCH. 01:25:43	Respect it! 01:26:43	( grunts ) Whoa! 01:27:01	( marker squeaking ) By kylvie, king of svitjod, houthedy and yppor. 01:27:25	I summon thee, god of gunningap - nifleheim, kvelge-- - Betty:TIM? 01:27:35	Tim? is that you? 01:27:38	Tim! 01:27:44	Kvelgemir! 01:27:57	Who summons odin, - allfather of the gods? 01:28:00	- Shh! 01:28:02	! 01:28:02	- Shh! 01:28:03	- ( whispers ) You'll wake the baby. 01:28:04	- Oh, sorry. 01:28:06	Loki, is that you? 01:28:10	Betty:TIM. 01:28:11	What are you doing in there? 01:28:13	You did the conjuring ceremony - by yourself? 01:28:15	- I pay attention. 01:28:16	- Sometimes. 01:28:17	- But youdon't have the mask. 01:28:19	- Well, yeah, that's why i-- ! 01:28:23	And I specifically-- ow! 01:28:24	Could you just stop lecturing me for one ! 01:28:29	I found the baby. 01:28:29	He's right there. 01:28:32	- That child is strong. 01:28:33	- Mmm. 01:28:36	Very strong. 01:28:38	I had him before. 01:28:38	I was this close, but you took my powers and they got away. 01:28:43	So, please, father, give me my powers and I will give you the mask. 01:28:50	( grumbles ) Very well. 01:28:56	Your resourcefulness pleases me, and your mother says we should be trying "positive reinforcement," whatever the helveti that is. 01:29:05	So, as a reward, I shall grant you a reprieve. 01:29:11	You have until the sands have fallen. 01:29:14	Oh, hey, hey. 01:29:14	Wait, wait. 01:29:15	Hang on. 01:29:16	- Hmm? 01:29:16	-I want to sync up. 01:29:18	.. now! 01:29:23	Don't disappoint me, loki. 01:29:23	Use your powers wisely and complete your task. 01:29:26	This truly is your final chance! 01:29:38	( gasps ) ( sighs ) Tim. 01:29:56	What's going on up there? 01:29:59	Tim avery, what are you doing in there? 01:30:05	Hmm. 01:30:05	Nosy neighbors. 01:30:09	Ah-- ah-- choo! 01:30:12	( dog yelps ) - ( Loki's voice ) Guess who? 01:30:31	- No! ah! 01:30:33	( screams ) Tim, snap out of it! 01:30:37	Baby? 01:30:39	- Is that you? 01:30:39	- Of course it's me. 01:30:42	What are you doing up so late? 01:30:44	-And where's alvey? 01:30:44	- Seriously. 01:30:47	Is thatreallyyou? 01:30:49	No, you idiot. 01:30:51	Oh god. 01:30:51	Ah-- what-- i-- oh jeez. 01:30:59	Bro, listen. 01:31:01	I'm a god. 01:31:01	I can shape shift. 01:31:04	I can create stuff out of nothingness. 01:31:06	I can alter the fabric of reality, so, please, quit being a knucklehead. 01:31:11	- What do you want from us? 01:31:12	- Oh, don't worry. 01:31:14	- I'm not gonna .. 01:31:15	- ( sighs ) - Yet! 01:31:17	- ( gasps ) This baby was born out of the mask, and I want my mask back! 01:31:23	Meet me in exactly one hour. 01:31:30	So you find the mask and meet me at-- hmm. where shall we meet? 01:31:34	Um, how about red lobster? 01:31:35	It's always so difficult getting a table there, - especially on fridays when they do that special. 01:31:39	- There's a wick burning. 01:31:41	- Well, how about we meet in an alley in the city? 01:31:42	- There's a wick-- - met in one before. 01:31:45	.. 01:31:46	- Sir, your-- but it's not so cliché that I think to myself, " - but-- it-- it-- - meet me in that alley within the hour, withthe mask, if you ever want to see your little monster again. 01:32:01	No! 01:32:01	( whimpers ) Alvey! no! 01:32:06	( echoes ) What-- tim? 01:32:30	! 01:32:32	! 01:32:36	Oh god. tim! 01:32:37	( yelling ) WHAT ARE YOU-- WHAT ARE YOU-- Tim. what are you doing? 01:32:44	What are you doing? 01:32:48	( snarls ) Get off of me! get off of me! 01:32:52	where's my son, you mongrel? 01:33:01	( shouts ) TIM! AH! 01:33:03	TONYA?! ( gasps ) Tonya! oh, it's really you. 01:33:11	Oh my god. oh god, I'm so sorry. 01:33:14	Betty was right. you have gone crazy. 01:33:16	No, I haven't. I thought I did, but I didn't. 01:33:21	Where's alvey? 01:33:24	! 01:33:26	! 01:33:28	! 01:33:30	! 01:33:32	No, i-- oh my god. 01:33:35	( whimpers ) TONYA, LISTEN! 01:33:38	! 01:33:40	My son is missing-- no, tonya, listen! 01:33:42	he's the god of mischief. 01:33:45	All he wants is his mask, which otis is wearing. 01:33:48	And if I can just figure out where otis is, I can just-- of course! 01:33:53	Our child is missing and you're worried ! 01:33:57	( gasping ) See what I'm talking about? 01:34:00	Now, you're gonna have to trust me and get in the car, because I know where alvey is and I know how to get him back, because I know the one place otis the moose would go. 01:34:08	♪♪ And they called it ♪♪ 01:34:10	♪♪ 01:34:12	( growling ) ♪♪ OH, I GUESS THEY'LL NEVER Know ♪♪ 01:34:21	see there's this really cute pooch venus. 01:34:24	OTIS? ( record scratches ) OTIS! ( growls ) ( gasps ) THAT'S NOT OTIS! THAT'S A GREEN Critter. 01:34:31	I'm sorry, okay? 01:34:33	I've ignored you and I've been impatient, loki, that guy that made the mask? 01:34:39	He wants it back. he has alvey. 01:34:41	And he's a bad guy, otis. 01:34:43	HE HATES DOGS. ( growls ) He doesn't realize that dogs are truly man's best friend. 01:34:50	You're this man's best friend. 01:34:52	( querying growl ) BUT ALVEY'S MY SON Which sort of makes you like his big brother. 01:34:57	And when he grows up, he's gonna be your bestest friend. 01:35:02	But right now, he needs you AND HE NEEDS THAT MASK. ( grumbling ) All right. 01:35:17	( thunder crashes ) So, I guess you're KINDA CUTE, HUH? ( chuckles ) Um, can you, like, do anything you want, like me? 01:35:31	I mean, can you do this? 01:35:39	Wow. 01:35:41	Well, look at you! 01:35:42	You're just a little outlaw, ain't you? 01:35:44	( dramatic frontier music plays ) let's see how tough your rawhide can be. 01:36:15	Gotcha. 01:36:20	( birds twitter ) I like it! 01:36:25	So, you like games, huh? 01:36:27	( chuckles ) WELL YOU'D BETTER WATCH OUT 'Cause I've got a game that no one can beat me at. 01:36:34	Super twister! 01:36:37	Tim: It's just around the corner, right here. 01:36:39	- ( car horns honk ) - Here we go. 01:36:42	♪ Come on, baby ♪ 01:36:44	♪ let's do the twist ♪ 01:36:48	♪ come on, baby ♪ 01:36:50	♪ let's do the twist ♪ 01:36:52	♪ take me .. ♪ 01:36:54	isn't this fun? 01:36:54	( both giggling ) ♪ And go like this ♪ 01:36:59	♪ 01:37:00	- hi. 01:37:03	♪ Baby, baby, twist ♪ 01:37:05	♪ 01:37:09	- Loki:AH! 01:37:09	-♪ Just like this ♪ 01:37:12	♪ come on, little miss ♪ 01:37:15	♪ 01:37:18	- no, that's cheating. 01:37:19	♪ 01:37:22	( tires screech ) Whoa! 01:37:26	Whoa! 01:37:31	that crash threw me. rematch! 01:38:11	get the show ♪ all that glitters is gold ♪ 01:38:19	( music stops ) ( laughter ) .. 01:38:23	IN your McDonald ♪a a bdaba ba ♪ 01:38:44	b explore the smithsonian at night with a super you could win an excitingovernight museum adventure, battle of the " only in theaters. 01:39:05	.. 01:39:08	Museum sleepoverinstant win game. 01:39:10	many will enter, few will win. 01:39:13	Find your access codein specially marked boxes. 01:39:16	THEN GO TOthecheesiest.com TO ENTER... 01:39:18	Or learn how to playfor free. 01:39:20	Ask your parents first. 01:39:23	Cheese me! 01:40:56	THE MOST IMPORTANT PARTOF a McDonald's happy .. 01:41:07	♪ ba da ba ba ba ♪ 01:41:55	okay, you give me alvey, and the mask is yours. 01:42:15	I can't let go. I've grown attached. 01:42:17	Alvey! hey, we had a deal! 01:42:25	( screams ) ( growls ) ( groaning ) Huh. hey, loki. 01:42:55	Honey, you lookhot. 01:42:58	Give me back my son! 01:42:59	( phone clicks ) UM... NO. 01:43:04	Honey, I think it's time we trade up. 01:43:24	( roars ) BUCKLE UP, BABY. 01:43:36	Listen to loki, kid. 01:43:37	Dads are overrated and I speak from experience. 01:43:42	( screaming ) AH, THERE'S NOTHING LIKE A Sunday drive. 01:43:47	You wanna have some fun, kid, you stick with me. 01:44:02	All right. it's time to lose them for good. 01:44:13	Oh, look out, look out, look out! 01:44:16	( Tonya screaming ) Tim: YAHOO! 01:44:22	( whines ) ( screaming ) Both:! 01:44:31	Hey, babe, look. no hands. I'm kidding. 01:44:34	Let's just finish this. 01:44:40	Now, where did he go? 01:44:44	Hmm. uh, honey? 01:44:45	I think, maybe, there? 01:44:50	( crowd cheering ) And here he is,folks, thefailureof fringe city, yes, it's tim "no-win" avery! 01:45:14	Tim, it's alvey. I'm gonna go get him. 01:45:18	Kick his can, honey. 01:45:31	( overlapping chatter ) Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee. 01:45:37	( crowd cheers ) Hi, baby. hi, baby. hi, baby. 01:45:41	well,jump like a grasshopper and stink like askunk! 01:45:49	Caught me with my mouth open! 01:45:51	You can't fight me if you're locked in a trunk. 01:45:54	HUH? ( grunts ) ( chuckles ) ( grunts ) ( grunts ) I'M COMING, I'M COMING. 01:46:10	( Loki screaming ) Let's get outof this dump. come on. 01:46:15	Loki: And loki said, "let there be a brick " AND THERE WAS! ( laughs ) Okay! 01:46:25	No more mr. nice guy! 01:46:29	( Latin accent ) SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND! 01:46:33	( sonar pings ) Tim! tim! 01:46:49	Here's loki! 01:46:54	Tim, tim, tim, tim, t-t-t-t-t-- wait. 01:47:11	This is a wasteof time. 01:47:13	We're evenly-matched opponents. 01:47:17	I think we should let the kid decide. 01:47:20	Why, that's a swell idea. 01:47:59	get the show ♪ all that glitters is gold ♪ 01:48:07	( music stops ) ( laughter ) .. 01:48:10	IN your McDonald ♪ ba da ba ba ba ♪ 01:48:14	THE MOST IMPORTANT PARTOF a McDonald's happy .. 01:50:55	♪ ba da ba ba ba ♪ 01:51:40	alvey, this is yourdecision. 01:51:45	Pick me, pick me! alvey? 01:51:46	I'm your real dad! come on, you little devil. 01:51:47	Let's play! 01:51:52	Come on, alvey. alvey. 01:51:55	( circus music playing ) Alvey? 01:52:02	Loki: Yeah, that's right. tim! 01:52:05	SON. ( Tonya gasps ) ( music stops ) Alvey, look at me. 01:52:27	It's your dad. 01:52:29	There's no more superpowers. 01:52:32	I know at first I was kind of a jerk. 01:52:35	I didn't know how to handle a son, but you helped me grow up. 01:52:41	And I want to repay you by helpingyou grow up. 01:52:47	I love you. 01:52:53	Come on. 01:52:59	Da-da. oh, alvey. 01:53:02	It's my son. 01:53:06	( laughs ) YES. 01:53:12	I just wanted a friend. 01:53:19	( roaring ) ( Tonya screams ) ( screams ) Push! push! 01:54:07	( screams ) ( beeping ) Huh? 01:54:20	( gasps ) that's not good. 01:54:56	Your time is up, son. 01:54:57	As expected, you failed in your promise. 01:55:01	You failed in your quest. 01:55:03	You are, in every sense of the word, a failure. and I thought your dad was mean. 01:55:09	Hey, we both knew it would end like this, right? 01:55:11	at least in that respect, I'm living up to your expectations. silence! 01:55:17	You've brought me much pain, loki. 01:55:22	Right back at you,dad. 01:55:26	Hey! tim, no! 01:55:27	Hang on just a minute, grizzly adams. 01:55:29	I don't know how things work in thegodworld, but you're his father, he's your son. 01:55:35	And even if you banish him, he's still gonna be your son. 01:55:40	There is nothing more important in this entire universe than your relationship with your family, especially if you're immortal. 01:55:49	You're like 1,000, he's like 800, so you might as well get things right now and enjoy the rest of your eternal life. 01:55:57	Here's the thing. just take it. 01:56:04	Okay? loosen up. 01:56:12	( grumbles ) ( chuckles ) Come on, son. let's go home. 01:56:25	Odin:OKAY? OKAY. 01:56:28	Godspeed. 01:56:34	Maybe now, I can help you patch things up with mom? 01:56:38	Don't push it. 01:56:55	Moss: A baby and a dog competing for dad's attention-- iloveit. 01:57:01	Simple, but it's-- it's got-- spark? yes. 01:57:08	Where did you get the idea? 01:57:10	Well, I just kind of quit trying so hard .. 01:57:17	( barks ) THE IDEA JUST CAME TO ME. 01:57:20	It's great. 01:57:31	( coos ) ( siren blares ) Yay! yay! 01:57:55	Honey, oh. 01:57:56	That was such a good show! 01:57:59	But I think you might need to add another character. 01:58:04	What? 01:58:09	Really? yeah. 01:58:11	( chuckles ) What do you think about that, double a? 01:58:18	A little brother or sister? 01:58:20	How does that sound? 01:58:30	( metallic clipping ) ( snarling laughter ) ( howls ) ( clunks ) Life, it sailson the ocean ♪♪ 01:58:47	♪♪ it can swallowthe hills alone ♪♪ 01:58:51	♪♪ but you don't haveto see to know ♪♪ 01:58:53	♪♪ time, it can flywith the wind ♪♪ 01:58:57	♪♪ I imaginethe world above ♪♪ 01:59:01	♪♪ and it's allinside your mind ♪♪ 01:59:07	♪♪ 01:59:12	♪♪ find what the worldhas for us inside ♪♪ 01:59:17	♪♪ but one other wayis clear ♪♪ 01:59:21	♪♪ now it's timefor you both to grow ♪♪ 01:59:26	♪♪ just close your eyesand dream ♪♪ 01:59:31	♪♪ of the endlesspossibilities ♪♪ 01:59:37	♪♪ life, it sailson the ocean ♪♪ 01:59:41	♪♪ it can swallowthe hills alone ♪♪ 01:59:45	♪♪ but you don'thave to see to know ♪♪