The Next Iron Spider

Lately, whenever I'm hangin' with my Aunt May, some villain always shows up. Then I have to come up with some excuse to get away and become Spider-Man. [Growls] Just remembered, I left my sunglasses. Be right back. Just remembered, I left my sunglasses. Be right back. Just remembered, I really need to come up with a better excuse. But, thankfully, today has been villain free. Everything on the menu looks so good. I think I'm gonna try the [People screaming] That's the unstoppable Juggernaut. And somebody's gonna have to stop him. [Grunting] Drop the money, scuzz-bucket! Or face the wrath of Squirrel Girl. You gotta be kidding me. You gotta be kidding me. I know, right? Let's get out of here, Aunt May. [Grunting] You gonna stop me, little girl? You and what army? Um, this one. Tippy toes! Monkey Joe! Mr. Lieberman! Go get that Jugger-nut! [Grunting] All I see are squirrels! Horrible, horrible squirrels! Hold it right there, fuzzy. Shut up. Spider-Man? You're the best at this "hero who saves the day" stuff. Oh, oh, oh. You like how I totally handled the Juggernaut? Handled? You call this "handled?" You took down Juggy, but you also took down a few million bucks of the city with him. You might think you're a hero, but that doesn't make you one. Course it does. I'm your friendly neighborhood Squirrel Girl. Did you not hear a word I Wait, "friendly neighborhood?" Hey, that's my catchphrase! Oh, and look at this. Hero 101, chapter one: You tie up the bad guy after you knock him out. Oh, no. [Grunting] And of course, the bad guy was only pretending to be knocked out. Hero 101, chapter 2, I think. [Grunting] Alley-oop! Uh, hold that pose. And smile. [Screams] Not gonna front. Some of these new heroes are startin' to wear on me. Running around with their shiny new costumes and fancy nicknames. As if that's what it takes to be a hero. [Fury] Says the teenager in a red and blue costume. So you're saying squirrel girl shouldn't be on the list? I mean, she has squirrel powers, but seriously, "squirrel powers?" I don't see her makin' it. Not unless we need nuts for the winter. While we're on the subject of heroes, there's a new addition to our list as of today. You May know him. Amadeus Cho. [Monkey shrieks] Amadeus Cho? The little know-it-all who goes to our school? The same. We arranged for him to attend midtown, so we can keep an eye on him. Now's the time for Spider-Man to recruit him. But Cho is only thirteen years old. I he's even worse than Squirrel Girl. He doesn't have any powers. Technically, he does. His intellect is off the charts. He's the seventh-smartest person on the planet. That doesn't make Amadeus Cho a superhero. He's a kid. He's not that smart. [Bell rings] Gimme some tickets, man. Hey, I was next! Yo, make a path! I want some too! People need to chill. They take this raffle way too seriously. I know, right? By the way, I need to borrow ten bucks. What? The grand prize is a dirt bike. And I needs me a dirt bike. "Hey, Stan. "While Coulson's away, how'd you like to be acting principle?" "Oh, would I," I say. "Congratulations. Now start fundraising. " Why, I ought to Attention, fellow students. Right this way. Here to save the fundraiser. Behold! The Iron Spider! I dunno, Parker. I'm no high-tech honcho, but it seems like a bad idea to have Stark tech out in the open. Relax, principal Stan. Iron man made it. Everyone loves Iron man, right? Charge one dollar per photo, we'll have the money raised before you know it. [Woman screams] Security, to the bake sale table. Repeat: Security, to the bake sale table. Step right up! Come one, come all! Who will be the first to get a photo with the eighth wonder of the modern world? The Iron Spider! No way Is that the real thing? Ugh, Amadeus Cho. Ugh, Peter Parker. Here's the deal. Me, Peter Parker. Huge I. Q. Number one in math. Number one in science. Top student. Then, transfer student, Amadeus Cho. Uncharted I. Q. Skipped a few grades. Holds several patents. Is banned from all TV game shows. Aah! Now Peter Parker is number two. [Laughs] Agh! In everything. And now Fury wants me to recruit him to join S. H. I. E. L. D? Ugh, great. Never seen actual Stark tech in person before. You know, I'm Tony's biggest fan. I've even built tech compatible with his ARC reactor. Next-gen theoretical stuff. Heh, theoretical is cute. But I've got the real thing. I know. With its top-secret self-charging energy matrix, and revolutionary tertiary cooling system, that armor is priceless. The teenage prodigy Cho will be a valuable asset to my operation. But unguarded Stark tech is too valuable to pass up. Maybe you know about the armor, but I got to bring it to school because I'm personal friends with Wait for it, Spider-Man. And you're willing to admit that in public? Don't you keep up with the news? Spider-Man is a menace. Hold on a second, you little Spidey-sense. Hey, where are you going with that? Nick Fury just showed up. Says it's too dangerous. You got an issue? Better take it up with our stalwart superior. Oh, I'll take something up all right. What is Nick Fury doing here anyway? It's not like him to [Man] Help me! Get me outta here! Get me outta here! Help! Help! Get me outta here! I I can't get out. Help! Oh, the ignominious injustice of it all. But if you're in here? I don't think that's yours. Outta my way! I've got a job to do. Not foolin' me. Pretty fast for an old guy. You think you can take me? You have no idea who you're dealing with. [People gasp] This is not your beloved janitor turned principal. It's Ew. [Evil laugh] Taskmaster! Come back to finally get your G. E. D., Tasky? What? I can't get a hello from my favorite hooded, armor-stealing assassin-slash-mercenary? Ow. Nice to see you again. [Grunts] Can't say the feeling's mutual. Got some new moves to show ya. Power man! Nova! Did you really think you could get the drop on me? Well, kinda. Yeah. You can't beat me. I've studied all your moves. I know what you're going to do before you do it. Spidey sense? Something other than Taskmaster? Oh, no. What in blazes? Okay, the armor didn't just come to life. I mean, unless it did. Did it? It's not Spidey. But whoever it is in there, they're good. [Groans] Now's our chance! He's gone. And not that we aren't grateful, but who's wearing the armor? Amadeus Cho?!? So you've heard of me, Spider-Menace? Aw, how'd you fit in there, little guy? The armor have a booster seat? Okay, fun time's over, Cho. Give back the armor before you hurt yourself. Back to who? You? I could be a superhero. A real hero. Better than you. Better than New York's number one criminal. I said, give it back! Get away from me, you menace. Uh, can we talk about this? Aah! [Groans] Ow. All this power. And now it's in the hands of a real hero. Not so fast, you tin-plated toddler. This is not "finders keepers. " What are you, a little kid? - Oh, yeah, you are. - Two Spider-Men? Two Novas I can get, but two Spideys? You are not a hero. And you're definitely not smarter than me. Don't have to be. Hey, guys, don't rush in or anything. Aah! Whoa! The intuitive nature of this tech is beyond brilliant. Gotcha! No, I've got you. Aah! Whoa. How'd you do that? I May be a kid, but I'm smart enough to do things with this armor that you never dreamed of. The armor is safer in my heroic hands. Enough, Amadeus. Get your butt outta there! Whoa! Aah! Ugh! I told you he was annoying. Ugh, come on, Spidey. How could you let a kid like Cho get away? And how could Fury expect me to recruit him? Web-head? Are you talking to yourself? Uh, no. I would never do that. I'm just majorly ticked off about the armor. This is not just about the armor, is it? It has nothing to do with the fact that everyone thinks Cho is smarter than me. Or that he just showed up one day and pushed me to number two. Easier there, webs. We gotta find that runt before he gets himself seriously hurt. Not likely. Did you see how good Cho was with that armor? Took him like two seconds to figure out all the So he can work the suit. That he stole. That doesn't make him a hero. Let's fan out and find him. Check me out. I'm the Iron Cho. In footage captured today, We see dangerous Iron Man tech escape this fool's control. I know Tony Stark, and Spider-Man is no Tony Stark. [Taskmaster] Jameson is right. The power of the armor shouldn't be in the hands of some wild menace. It should belong to someone skilled and brilliant. Someone like you. Stay back! You and I got off on the wrong foot earlier. We shouldn't have fought. We both want the same thing. You want the armor. No All I wanted was to get away from Spider-Man. And you did it for me. We're on the same side here. I want you in that armor. Trust me. Yoo hoo! Call me old-fashioned, but I never trust a guy with a Skull for a face. Don't let him steal your armor. Steal? That's my armor. Why is this so hard to understand? No! [People screaming] [Grunting] Hold it right there, Taskmaster. We're on the same team. Spider-Man is our enemy. Spider-Man is saving those people, and you just tried to take him out. I don't have to be a genius to know whose team I should be on. I'm disappointed, Cho. I had high hopes for you and that armor. Guess I'll just take the armor. Aah! [Evil laugh] [Exhales] I don't know what you just did to him, Tasky, but how about we call it a day and you give yourself up. [Evil laugh] That can't be good. Cho? Heh, sneak attack in the back. What else you got for me? Well, okay. Besides that? Don't feel bad. You didn't stand a chance. Every move you have, - I can counter. - You know my moves, but you don't know my tech upgrades. Flash webs! I have tech upgrades of my own. Aah! Finish him! Skewering Spidey is not hero behavior. You don't stand a chance against both of us. You're outnumbered. Might want to check your math. Oh, see, now he's thinking about it. You can tell because he's not happy. Let's make sure. Come on, Cho. You can't possibly want to work with Taskmaster. Huh? What's happening? Spider-Man? What's going on? You're talking. That's a good sign. Now how about you stop trying to take my head off? I'm not doing it. I'm not in control of the armor. What? Taskmaster uploaded some automated trojan horse program. I'm hacking the program, but It keeps evolving itself. Look out! Calm down. We need a core interrupt. But you'd have to be able to write a multi-function Hibernate-suspend program call. That's exactly it. Get on it! You have talent. But you just can't stay out of each other's way. [Cho] Sorry, Spidey! I'm trying to stop it! Sorry! Sorry! Sorry! No, I'm sorry! Don't panic, Amadeus. You got this. Attempting reboot now. [System shutting down] Systems back online. It worked. Told ya. Who's next? Ooh! Ooh! Us! Us! No, I control the armor. Not anymore. Nice one. Now let's finish him off! Aren't prepared for the double-spider tag-team, are you? I think we can chalk up a win here for the friendly neighborhood Spider-Men. What do you say, Tasky? [Groaning] You actually think you won? I did. Until you just said that. If I can't have the armor, no one can. Aah! Do I want to know what that was? Taskmaster's bug is still inside the armor. It just set the armor to overload. The cooling system is failing! Power Man can bust him out. Let's just let the armor blow up. Except that if that ARC reactor blows, it'll take half of Manhattan with it. Right then let's not do that then. Whatever that bug is doing, I can't access it through the armor's interface. Then I'm gonna have to rewire it manually. I'll bring up the schematics. There's a holo-display? I didn't even know the armor could do that. Find the one red wire. Then cross that one red wire with any of the blue wires. The "one" red wire, you said? Ten seconds. Nine seconds. You did say it was the red wire, right? Just do it! Aah! Phew! Uh-oh. Why is it not shutting down? Wait, you need to bring the back-up firewall online. I see it. Ha ha! We did it! You're a genius! No, you're a genius. Ow! Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. You were right. This isn't finder's keepers. You can take it back. I wasn't meant to wear it. What? It was like you were born to wear that armor. I have to admit, I couldn't have done what you did. You're letting me keep it? Yeah. I realized two things today. One, being smart is a power. Two, being a hero isn't just about powers. It's about good choices and heart. You've got the armor, and a solid head-start on the other two. So consider it on loan. And I think I know the best place for you to use it. I can not believe we're on the Tricarrier. That's not all, pal. Iron Spider, meet agent Venom. Venom used to be a bad guy, and now he's good and we both get to join your team? Not quite. I'm putting together a new S. H. I. E. L. D. team of new warriors. And you two are the first members. New warriors? You mean like the ones on Taskmaster's list? What do you mean, Taskmaster's list? Your hard work with Cho paid off. It's lucky we got to him first. When Cho reverse-hacked Taskmaster's tech, he was able to snag this off his files. It's the same list. The latest version of our list. The one we put Cho on yesterday. This means we've been compromised. Either somebody at S. H. I. E. L. D. 's a double agent, or Taskmaster is in the system. It's a race now. Me versus Taskmaster. And I don't want to know what happens if I come in second.