Elemental, My Dear Jasmine

 First scene 

The scene opens with a shot of the beach, waves crashing on the rocks and shore. We begin to hear Iago speaking, as the shot turns toward the beach, where Abu and Iago are laying on a towel, Abu is eating fruit out of a basket. There is a canopy with several pillows, towels, and beach items lying about.

Iago: I don’t get this beach stuff; we live in the desert, OK? So what do we do for fun? Frolic in the sand! (He kicks sand on Abu, who looks angry)  I think someone needs to get a life –

He is cut off as Abu shoves a banana in his beak, silencing him. Genie is playing volleyball with Carpet

Genie: Do over! Do over! Now I’m warmed up! (Hits the ball to Carpet)  Return this!

Carpet returns the hit, and Genie dives for it, falling face first in the sand.

Genie: I wasn’t ready! (He gets up, spitting out sand, and hits the ball again to Carpet) Do over! And none of that spiking stuff!

The scene shifts to Aladdin and Jasmine, who are walking along the beach and holding hands.

Jasmine: Aladdin, did you date other girls before me?

Aladdin: Tons!

Jasmine:  (tearing her hand away from Aladdin)  Oh really?

Aladdin: I mean, that uh, I had to sift through tons of sand to find a jewel! (He holds her hands)  You’re the only one for me Jasmine; no one will ever come between us!

Genie comes barreling between the two of them, knocking Jasmine into the water.

Genie: Heads up! (He sees Jasmine getting out of the water and looks sheepish)  Sorry.

Jasmine, sputtering, gets up and looks at herself, as a very large wave comes, completely covering her and knocking her down.

Iago: Ahhhh, ha ha ha ha!

Jasmine gets up, drenched, and her hair in disarray, covered in seaweed.

Aladdin: Jasmine! Ha, are you  (he breaks off, snickering)

Carpet comes and offers her a tassel to help her stand, and she looks highly annoyed, picking seaweed of her arm and hair. Iago comes and flaps next to her head.

Jasmine: It’s not funny!

Iago: Ok, we are not laughing at you – well actually, yes, we are! Ah, ha ha ha!

Abu and Genie begin to laugh hysterically. Aladdin wants to laugh, but tries to stop the others.

Aladdin: Genie…

Aladdin then looks at Jasmine again, whose pants have now ballooned out with water. She grabs the material and pulls, spilling water and fish out of the pant legs and onto the beach.

Aladdin begins to laugh.

Jasmine:  (furious)  Ohhhhhhh…

She storms off the beach as Aladdin, Genie, Abu, and Iago begin to laugh uproariously. Aladdin notices her marching off and they all stop laughing.

 Next scene 

Jasmine has wandered into a grotto. She sits on a rock overlooking the water, and looks at herself.

Jasmine: Ewwww! (She grabs seaweed out of her hair and throws it into the water) Well, they didn’t have to laugh!

Just then, another humongous wave comes up toward her.

Jasmine: Uhhhh! (The wave slams her into the water, and then she resurfaces)  Aladd-

Coughing, she is pulled under the water and is next seen in a swirling vortex being pulled far below. When she arrives at the bottom, in an overhang, the vortex disappears, and she grabs her throat, unable to breath. Just then, a mermaid swims up. She has red hair, ending in a lobster tail, spiral shell earrings, and is wearing a reddish-orange bustier top and tail with tiger shark markings. The mermaid looks delighted.

Selene the Mermaid: Hello sailor. (She looks at Jasmine and speaks, almost accusingly) You’re not a sailor – you’re a girl!

Jasmine is choking, and gestures to Selene. Selene looks annoyed, but throws some of her magic, looking like stars at her. Jasmine begins to breathe again.

Jasmine:  (amazed)  I can breathe? Underwater?

Selene: Yes, but don’t try it at home. This is enchanted water! (She begins to swim around Jasmine, examining her)  Works wonders for the complexion, too.

Jasmine: Who, uh, wh-, Who are you?

Selene: I am Selene, daughter of the water, siren of the sea, belle of the swell! (She examines herself in a shell mirror, and swims back to Jasmine.)

Jasmine: I, uh, I am Jasmine, Princess of Agrabah.

Selene: Well, you look like a shipwreck. (She begins to pick starfish and weeds out of Jasmine’s hair)  I should know, I’ve caused a few.

Jasmine lifts her hair up and pulls out a crab.

Jasmine: I uh, I’m not normally a mess, it’s, well, it’s just that my boyfriend and I-

Selene:  (sounding disgusted)  Boy trouble? How typical!

She swims up to an opening in the cave, and looks toward the surface.

Selene:  (crossing her arms)  You surface girls! The agony you put yourselves through!

Jasmine: But we have fun! It’s not agony!

Selene: Your hair is! (A tentacle grabs Jasmine and yanks her out of the shot)

Jasmine: Whoaaa!

Selene: Meet Armand!

Armand is a large purple octopus, who pulls Jasmine in his lap, and begins to do her hair.

Selene: He’s a miracle worker! (She pats her own perfect hair)  Knock yourself out big boy!

Armand teases Jasmine’s hair into a beehive, and hold a mirror for Jasmine to see. Selene critiques his work.

Selene: Hmmm… How 'bout going lighter?

Armand begins to spray Jasmine’s hair with a can. Jasmine’s hair poufs up, and then falls, long and red, a la Ariel from The Little Mermaid. Armand shakes his head know, and Selene scowls.

Selene: She looks like every other princess under the sea!

Armand is brushing Jasmine’s hair again, back to normal, though not in her customary ponytail. Suddenly they hear a voice from above, carrying far below to them.

Aladdin: Jasmine!

Jasmine: That’s Aladdin! He’s my—

Selene: Boyfriend? Hmpt! Take it from me, deep six him!

Jasmine: No. We may have our differences, but nothing can come between us.

Selene:  (sly)  Worships the dirt you walk on, does he?

Jasmine:  (suspicious)  You could say that – why?

Selene grins at her, takes the brush from Armand, and begins to brush her own hair.

Selene: Then, it will be a challenge for me to steal his heart.

Jasmine:  (Angry)  What?

Armand suddenly wraps one huge tentacle around Jasmine, pinning her to him.

Selene still has a nasty grin on her face, and picks up a seashell. She squeezes it, and pearls spit out, forming a necklace for her.

Jasmine:  (Struggling with Armand)  Oh, uh, let go of me!

Selene: Sinking ships gets so old, and I’ve never worked the dry side.

Aladdin’s voice comes down again, and they all look up, Jasmine still kicking and struggling against the octopus.

Selene looks in a mirror held by Armand.

Selene: But land or sea, I’m still me. I’ll win!

She swims up and away to the surface.

Aladdin: Jasmine! We were just kidding! Really!

Jasmine watches in horror as Selene swims toward the surface and Aladdin.

 Next scene 

Aladdin is still searching for Jasmine. He is hopping among the stones that form the cliffs along the beach, calling for her.

Aladdin: Jasmine! (whispers sadly to himself)  I’m sorry.

Next scene

Jasmine is still watching as Armand holds her down. She begins to struggle again.

Jasmine: Oh, OH, let go!

Armand glares at her, and begins to walk. As he passes a fallen tree, Jasmine puts both her feet on it and pushes hard. It propels them backward. Armand knocks his head on a rock and is dazed. A large conch shell falls from the top of the rock wall, and land right on his head. He lets go of Jasmine, and she beings to swim to the surface.

Selene has reached the surface, and pulling herself up on a rock, throws some magic dust trails from her hand that encircle her tail, making them become legs. She is now in a reddish-orange and yellow dress, with remarkably similar markings that she had before on her tail. She looks at her self and moves her feet.

Selene: Legs? What’s all the fuss about? (She looks down at Jasmine swimming quickly to her and gets a mocking tone to her voice)  Ohhh, the Princess is mad at me! (She puts her hands up like she is defending herself)  I’m scared! Hmpt!

She points her finger at the water, and her magic solidifies the waters surface, like a large plastic cover. Jasmine arrives at the surface, but cannot break through. She begins to pound on it.

Jasmine: Oh, Oh-no! Uh, Uh!

We can see the water moving where she is pounding her fists, but she cannot break through.

Selene: Oh yes, and the spell can’t be broken until I return…If I return.

 Next Scene 

Aladdin is on the beach, skipping stones into the water, looking dejected.

Aladdin: I didn’t mean to make her mad!

Iago: Then maybe you shouldn’t have laughed at her!

Aladdin:  (sighs)  Sometimes I just don’t understand her.

Suddenly, a large burst of red magic tosses Aladdin, Iago, and Abu, who had wandered over, into the air. They reappear and are now sitting at a table, Iago on the table, Abu and Aladdin in seats. A blue stage, covered in yellow smiley faces springs in front of them, and Carpet is playing drums. When he finished his set, a spotlight shins on the stage, and Genie appears. He is dressed in a jacket and shirt, and his tail is a microphone. He winces when he gets feedback on the mike, and taps it.

Genie: Hey it’s great to be back! Anybody here from out of the city-state? Ya know, I love the royal family, but what’s the deal with princesses today? (Aladdin scowls, and Genie zaps over to the table)  They say they want a guy with a sense of humor, but if ya laugh at em –  (he slices his head off, rolls it down his arm, and tosses it onto the table. Carpet gives a drum roll. Everyone looks at his head, still talking)  Is it me, or what?

Aladdin: Yeah! Why do girls have to be so complicated?

Iago: They should adore you without question! Period! The end! (He puts his wings on his hips)

Abu:  (Pounding the table with a fist)  Yeah!

Aladdin:  (Dejected again)  Tell that to Jasmine.

Genie:  (He blows up his head, disappears and reappears back on stage)  Now take my fifth master, Sheik Boo-Baum, fifty wives and a thousand and one nights, now, ha ha, I’m no mathematician but –  (He suddenly stops when he sees something)

It’s Selene, sashaying up the beach. Genie looks surprised.

Genie: Uh-oh, we got company!

Genie turns into a blue crab, and scuttles behind a rock. All his props disappear. Carpet is on a rock, Iago is on Aladdin’s shoulder, and Abu is grabbing Aladdin’s leg. They all watch her walk toward Aladdin. Iago flies up off his shoulder as Selene reaches Aladdin. She puts one finger on his lips, then closes his mouth.

Selene: Careful! I know someone who drowned that way!

She walks off and Iago flaps back to Aladdin who looks stunned.

Iago: Babe-a! Woooo!

Selene sits and poses seductively on a rock.

Selene: Magnificent view, isn’t it?

As Aladdin is staring at her, Genie, still a crab comes to Aladdin and uses a claw to chomp on his toe.

Aladdin: Ouch! Genie—

Genie: We have to find Jasmine!

Abu and Carpet nod. Iago hits Aladdin’s shoulder with his wing.

Iago: But look at her! Total knockout! (He lands on Aladdin’s shoulder)  And did you see those pearls? She’s rich!

Aladdin:  (Annoyed)  So is Jasmine!

Genie: Yeah!

Iago: But this girl flaunts it!

Aladdin: Hey, maybe she’s seen Jasmine. (He walks toward her)

Selene:  (With her hand raised to shade her eyes in the classic looking far and wide gesture)  I seek a brave and manly escort to accompany me to town.

Iago:  (To Selene)  Seek no more!

Aladdin comes onto the rocks, takes her hand, and helps her stand.

Selene: But I don’t know my way around! I am so very far from my kingdom.

Iago: She’s royalty too! This is great!

Selene:  (Seeing Genie the crab crawling around, mutters to herself)  How cute, a genie! (She points at him with her hand behind her back. A large wave comes up onto the beach and grabs him, carrying him far off shore.)

Genie: Yow! Whoaaaaa! Dohhhh! (Gurgling)

Aladdin:  (Removing Selene’s hand from his arm)  Actually, I’m looking for someone too. Have you seen a girl?

Selene:  (As if she was thinking hard)  You know, I did pass a damp young thing with long dark hair.

Aladdin: That’s Jasmine!

Selene: She stormed off, complaining about her dreadful ex-boyfriend.

Aladdin: Ex?

Iago: Yeah, that would be you!

Aladdin:  (To Iago)  I have to find her and straighten this out. (He climbs down off the rock)  Guys, I’m going back to Agrabah!

Selene: Oh-a! Well it looks like I have my brave and manly escort after all! (She grabs onto this arm so he can escort her.)

Aladdin:  (surprised)  Uh, right, I guess so!

Selene: Let’s swim! I, I mean, walk!

They walk off. Abu, Iago, and Carpet are standing on the beach when they hear honking. They look out toward the ocean and see Genie racing toward them on a jet ski. He hits a large rock and flies off the jet ski, landing on the beach.

Genie: Where’s Al?

Carpet skirts around him, and points in the direction. Then he takes Genie’s head and actually turns it in the right direction.

Aladdin and Selene are walking and talking.

Selene: Your arm is so powerful, mmmmmm. Are you a swimmer?

Genie floats down with an umbrella, dressed as Jiminy Cricket from Pinocchio. He lands on Aladdin’s shoulder, and closes his umbrella.

Genie: Let your conscience be your guide. You have to find Jasmine!

Aladdin: That’s what I’m doing!

Genie:  (Pointing toward Selene)  Does she have to come?

Selene looks to see what is going on. She sees Genie, gets a nasty look on her face, and points at him, filling the air with bubbles. The all converge over Genie’s head and explode with water, knocking him off Aladdin’s shoulder with a yell. They continue to walk off as Genie pulls his head out of the sand. He spits out sand, and begins to box in place, fists flying.

Genie: Ok, who did that? Come on, I know there was magic involved!

 Next scene 

Jasmine is sitting on a rock, fuming.

Jasmine: I will not let that two-faced fish steal Aladdin! There has to be some way out of this water-world.

She swims off, and Armand come to the rock she was just at, having just missed her. He lifts the rock, where there is a little squid. It spits into his face, and swims off. Armand throws the rock and shakes the ink off.

Jasmine has come to openings in the roof of the underwater world and looks out. She looks through one particular opening, and sees her city through it.

Jasmine: Wow - it’s Agrabah! This water really is enchanted.

She continues to swim, looking out different openings.

 Next scene 

Aladdin and Selene, still hanging onto his arm, are in the Agrabah marketplace, talking.

Selene: Sooo, you survived the elephant stampede and got the treasure?

Aladdin:  (Flattered)  Well, yeah, pretty much.

Jasmine turns away from the hole she had been watching through in tears. The scene of Aladdin and Selene is still visible behind her.

Jasmine: Aladdin, how could you?

In the Marketplace, a camel dips his head into the water to get a drink, and sees Jasmine’s image looking back at him. When he spies it, he runs off.

A man, carrying a yoke on his back with two buckets of water, is walking along the street, and puts them down in the street, in front of Aladdin and Selene, who have just come up. Jasmine sees them and tries to get their attention.

Jasmine: Aaaaaaaa!

Water man: Would you like to buy a cool drink for the lovely lady?

Selene:  (In a harsher voice)  I am parched here on land! (Aladdin looks surprised, and her voice changes back to the sweet one of before)  Ehem, in your land, that is.

Water man:  (handing Aladdin the ladle)  Drink! Drink! I have plenty more. (He bends down to get the other ladle, and spots Jasmine’s face.)  Gasp! There is a girl!

Aladdin: Uh, Where? (Selene puts her arm around him spins him around. They walk off, as she points to the bucket. The water man is still leaning over the bucket, looking at Jasmine’s image. Selene’s magic makes the water shoot into the man’s face, knocking him high into the air.)

Selene:  (Takes ladle from Aladdin and throws it out)  Ha ha, Aladdin, show me more of your beautiful city!

Aladdin:  (Looking annoyed)  I’ve got to get to the Palace.

Selene: Oooo, you take me to the finest places!

On top of a spire on a tall building, the water man sits and watches them walk off.

 Next scene 

Jasmine is swimming around, trying to decide what to do next.

Jasmine: She won’t get away with this!

As Jasmine swims, three purple tentacles shoot in front of her, blocking off forward swimming. As she turns around, three more purple tentacles block off her rear exit. She looks up and sees Armand. He was looming over her, but now begins to close in.

Jasmine: Aaaaaaaaa!

COMMERCIAL BREAK

Armand has Jasmine wrapped in a tentacle again. Jasmine struggles to get free. She finally frees an arm, and begins to punch him, as Armand grunts and roars at her. Jasmine gets an idea as Armand grabs her ponytail in another tentacle.

Jasmine: Armand! Armand stop! (She points to her head)  You’re messing up my hair!

Armand gets the horrified look on his face, as he slaps two of his tentacles on his face. He lets go of her and begins to try to fix her hair. Jasmine darts off and begins to swim away quickly. Armand finally realizes he’s been had, and takes off after her.

He gets close enough to her that one of the suctions on his tentacle grabs the bottom of Jasmine’s shoe. She begins to struggle again, and with a plop, is able to free her shoe from her foot. She swims off and presses herself up against a rock.

Armand, still with Jasmine’s shoe attached, reaches two of his tentacles around the rock, trying to grab her. Jasmine grabs both tentacles, and uses the suctions on the tentacles, presses them both together, pinning him to the rock.

Jasmine:  (swimming past him)  Knock yourself out, big boy.

The octopus glares at her, and tries to follow. He does not make it far, and the pinned tentacles pull him back, making him crash against the rock, and he sits there dazed, eyes spinning in his head.

Jasmine swims up to a large yellow fish, and jumps on the back of it, and rides off.

Jasmine: I have to get Aladdin to see me.

 Next scene 

Aladdin and Selene, still holding his arm, are walking through the marketplace. They walk past vendors calling out their merchandise.

Vendor: Pistachios!

Selene has her nose in the air and looks disgusted. Aladdin looks at her, and she suddenly gets a big smile on her face, and hugs herself close to him.

A vendor shoves a fish under her nose.

Vendor 2: Fresh fish!

Selene:  (looking surprised)  Charlie? You reckless fool.

Aladdin: Uh, well, Selene? I should get going now.

Jasmine’s face appears in a barrel of water.

Jasmine: Aladdin!

Aladdin  (surprised and looking around)  Jasmine? Where are you?

Selene goes to stand next to the barrel.

Selene: Hmmm? I didn’t hear anything!

When she points to the barrel, holes appear on it, spilling all the water out. Aladdin tries to look around and past her, but when he sees the barrel, it has nothing but fish in it.

Aladdin: Uh, there’s somebody I have to talk to, right away!

Selene:  (Puts her arms around Aladdin’s neck)  Talk to me, Al!

Aladdin tries to duck out of Selene’s hug, but she then grabs his arm. He sighs.

Later

Selene is still dragging Aladdin around.

Aladdin: Uh, Selene, really, uh I—

Selene: Oh, clam up and show me around!

Meanwhile, on an archway overlooking them, Carpet, Abu, and Iago are watching them.

Iago: (looks pleased) Look at ‘em! Kid’s turning out to be quite a lady-killer!

Abu is not so happy looking. Genie suddenly appears floating in a meditation style sitting position above Iago.

Genie: Unless the lady kills him first. (He drops, still in the meditation position, on top of Iago)

Abu: Squeak!

Iago pulls himself out from under Genie’s rear as Abu and Carpet chuckle.

Iago: What?

Genie: Aha! (Genie turns into Sherlock Holmes, complete with pipe)  It’s elemental, my dear parrot. That is to say, Selene is an elemental, subclass water. (He blows a bubble from the pipe, filled with water, and floats it above Iago’s head)  Consider her uncanny ability to manipulate liquid.

He pops the bubble with the end of his pipe, and the water drops on Iago’s head.

I ago: Ewwwwww!

Genie:  (Now floating in a bubble past Iago)  Consider the coincidental timing between Jasmine’s disappearance and Selene’s big entrance. (He disappears, and reappears behind Abu and Carpet)  She’s the number one suspect in …  (He pulls a screen down, with two mug shots of Selene)  the case of the vanishing princess! (His head appears where Selene’s left mug shot was.)

Down in the marketplace, Selene is still dragging a reluctant Aladdin around with her.

Selene: Aha ha ha ha! (she moves in to kiss Aladdin, and he backs away)

Genie, Carpet, Abu, and Iago are watching from above on a balcony.

Genie:  (aside to Iago)  We don’t want to arouse her suspicions yet.

Iago: Ya’ve got her all wrong, I’m telling ya!

Selene:  (Walking her fingers up Aladdin’s bare chest)  I am your destiny!

Aladdin: But I already have destiny!

Selene:  (slightly harsher tone of voice)  That destiny is history!

Aladdin:  (confused)  Huh?

Iago:  (slightly worried)  Err, let’s say you’re right – is she dangerous?

Genie:  (back to normal)  Only if Al really makes her mad!

Aladdin: I’m sorry Selene, but you’re not the one for me! See, I have a girl, Jasmine!

Jasmine:  (image in a well)  Yes!

Aladdin: Jasmine?

Selene: She’s trapped in a watery netherworld! (Cups Aladdin’s face)  And those long-distance relationships never work!

Jasmine:  (points an accusing finger at Selene)  You’re the one who trapped me!

Aladdin:  (to Selene)  You’ve got to release Jasmine! (Turning to Jasmine)  I love her.

Jasmine: I love you too, Aladdin.

Selene watches the two of them gazing at each other.

Selene:  (turning sweet again)  Oh Aladdin, maybe for you this is true love, and maybe for me it’s all just a cruel game, but you must understand…  (She now yells as the sound of thunder cracks)  I NEVER LOSE!!!

Genie:  (appearing between the two of them)  Perhaps you don’t realize that you are up against semi-phenomenal, nearly cosmic powers! Now let’s see what your little elemental agua powers can do!

Selene casually examines her nails, then points. At the well, all the water shoots out at once, and turns into a big watery hand. It starts to lower toward Genie. Aladdin backs out of the way.

Genie: Maybe we don’t have to get our powers involved in this-omfff!

He’s cut off as the hand grabs his, lifts him up, and begins to whirl him around and around, finally turning into a swirling vortex.

Genie:  (gurgling)  Whoawhoawhoat!

Selene:  (pointing and laughing)  Aha ha ha ha ha!

The vortex is going faster and faster. Genie is inside. Jasmine, at the bottom of the vortex and still in clam waters, sees Genie and grabs his head. You can still see his neck going around like a corkscrew.

Jasmine: Genie, if it’s all a game to her, make her think she’s won!

Genie:  (dizzy with eyes rolling)  She hasn’t quite lost yet!

Aladdin grabs Selene’s arm, which she had raised and was spinning around.

Aladdin: Selene! Stop!

Selene:  (growling)  Yes, dear?

The storm stops and disappears. As Selene and Aladdin glare at each other, Genie, very tiny, appears on Aladdin’s shoulder and whispers in his ear.

Genie: Ok Al, Jazz says get her back to the water! (He disappears)

Aladdin: I’ve changed my mind! You’re beautiful. She’s cute. You’re powerful! (He puts his arm around her shoulder)  She’s a prisoner! You are my new destiny.

Genie:  (wringing out his tail at the well)  Al! How could you?

Aladdin:  (angry)  Hush up and start making some magic for me and my gal.

They begin to walk off. Up on the balcony, where Carpet, Abu, and Iago were watching, everyone looks stunned, and Abu and Iago’s jaws drop to the railing they are standing on.

Genie: Ohhhh, but what about the fair Princess Jasmine?

Aladdin:  (scornfully)  Ehhhhhh, yesterday’s news!

Genie:  (sobbing)  Oh,ohohohohoh! If that’s what you wish, Mister Master.

Genie disappears, and then reappears, dressed in a uniform. He makes Carpet appear, with Abu dressed as a chauffeur, sitting at the front.

Abu: Ohhhh!

Selene:  (stepping on Carpet)  A genie that tows the line! That’s what I like to see.

Genie:  (taking her hand to help her step)  I live to serve. (When Selene turns her head, he makes a horrible face, with tongue sticking out, one eyeball bulging, and when she turns again, is back to his normal face with a big grin.)

Aladdin: Driver, take us to that romantic little sea-side café.

Abu: Squeaks and chatters

Abu grimaces, and, like he was driving the car, takes the wheel, shifts, and steps on the gas. Then Carpet shoots off with the sound of squealing tires.

Genie:  (waving and crying)  Drive carefully!

Iago is still on the balcony, astonished.

Iago: What are you doing?

Genie:  (smiling at him)  The best actor nomination! (Grabs a tear.)  The tears cinch it!

COMMERCIAL BREAK

 Next scene 

The scene opens back at the beach. Genie appears, with Iago on his shoulder. Iago looks around, confused.

Iago: What are we doing back at the beach?

Genie: Al’s on his way here with Selene.

Another Genie appears, wearing a white hard-hat, red shirt, and white overalls.

Genie 2: Ready when you are boss.

Genie 2 points and a hard hat appears on Iago, totally covering his head. He pushes it off hard with his wings, and then throws it past the second Genie.

Iago: Ready for what?!

Genie 2: Better wear that hard hat son, this here’s a construction site.

Genie 2 grabs Iago, and squeezes him. Iago turns into a whistle, which roars out.

Iago: Ahhhhhh! (He flaps away fast)

Three more Genies’ appear behind the Genie 2, all wearing the same thing. One turns his hand into a buzz-saw, and begins to cut up a huge pile of lumber. Another one starts nailing, his hand a hammer. The last one keeps a lookout on his watch.

Genie 3: BREAK!

We next see the four Genies taking a break. One is lying on the ground, his hardhat over his eyes, snoring. The one with the watch is reading the paper. The other two are leaning on a sawhorse, drinking coffee and talking.

Genie 2: So I said to him, oh really? I didn’t see your name on it!

The huge pile of wood becomes a giant scaffolding, and the beginnings of a building. Genie, with Iago on his shoulder again, is talking.

Iago: What gives? I thought we were on a tight schedule!

Genie: Maybe Carpet will hit some traffic on the way here?

Iago flies off and up. He clears the scaffolding, and looks out. He sees Carpet fling over the sand dunes, on his way there with Aladdin, Selene, and Abu.

Iago: Ahhhh! (He dive-bombs back to Genie. He reaches Genie, and yanking his beard to stop himself, jumps onto Genie’s shoulder.)  They’re almost here!

Genie:  (sounding worried)  Anytime now, fellas…

Suddenly Genie 3’s watch begins to beep, singling the end of break. He looks at it as the other two continue to drink coffee.

Genie 2: Yeeeeeep, it’s time.

The jump right back to work, sawing, and hammering, nailing, flinging lumber around. A building is definitely forming on top of the scaffolding.

Iago:  (scornful)  I don’t care how fast they are, they’ll never do it in time!

He crosses his wings and looks away. Another Genie’s hand reaches into the shot, grabs Iago, who looks terrified, and uses him as a whistle again.

Genie 2: Call it a day, boys!

The three other Genies’ are standing on the roof of the building. They grin and disappear one at a time. Genie 2 is by Genie and Iago, the Genies shaking hands.

Genie: Oh, thanks! Just in time for our grand opening!

 Next scene 

We see the building, and hear Iago’s voice begin before we actually see the group. Iago is dressed in a little pirate’s hat and eye patch, with a stripped shirt, standing on a stool reading out of a large book on a podium, like a host in a restaurant.

Iago: Ahoy and welcome to Cap’n Salty’s Swillery!

Aladdin:  (winking)  Table for two please!

Iago: Did you make a reservation? Cuz I’m telling ya, it’s been crazy tonight! (They look around; the restaurant is empty, with flies buzzing around)  Wellll, maybe I can fit you in, for, cough, ahem, a small gratuity! (He holds out his wing)

Genie dashes into the scene, wearing a white sailor outfit, and speaking in a high, whiny voice.

Genie: Hi kids! Let’s get you a table! My name is Gene and I’ll be your waiter.

Outside view of the restaurant, with Genie’s voice speaking.

Genie: Oh another day, another drachma!

Inside again, Aladdin and Selene are sitting at a table with a candle between them. Genie pulls out menus and shoves them in their faces.

Genie: I highly recommend the Grouper Newberg! It’s nummy, nummy, nummy!

Selene: Hmmm, I don’t know. (She shrugs)  Surprise me.

Suddenly the floor drops out beneath her. Her chair was on a trap door, and she falls to the water below.

Selene: Ahhhhhhhh!

Aladdin, Genie, Abu, Iago, and Carpet peer at her from the trap door.

All: Surprise!

Selene:  (surfacing below)  OHHHHHHH! (She slams the water with her fist)  That little worm-eaten barnacle!

She looks amazed for a second, and then disappears below the surface as she is pulled below.

Selene: AHHHH!

Jasmine surfaces.

Jasmine:  (Gasping)  Yes! (She jumps and punches her fist into the air.)

Aladdin is already racing toward her on Carpet.

Aladdin: It worked! Hang on!

Genie: Go for it, Al!

Aladdin swoops by and grabs Jasmine’s hands, lifting her onto Carpet.

Selene:  (furious ) Humans never play fair! (She begins to slam her fists on the water, and then dives below.)

Aladdin and Jasmine are on Carpet above.

Aladdin: Jasmine, she- uh-I-uh-

Jasmine: No one will ever come between us, Aladdin.

A gigantic wave is now following them. Aladdin hugs Jasmine close.

Aladdin: Hold your breath!

Genie, Abu, and Iago are running out of the restaurant, trying to escape from another wave that is racing toward them, but do not make it.

Genie: Whoaa-guh!

The three of them are covered.

Aladdin and Jasmine surface.

Jasmine:  (points)  Look!

Abu and Iago are coming toward them, floating on Carpet.

Iago: Ugh, egh, oh-

Aladdin: Where’s Genie?

Genie comes springing out of the water, along with Armand, who has a hold of Genie’s tail with one of his tentacles. Genie begins to yell and try to claw the water to get out of there.

Genie: SOS! SOS! (Armand’s tentacle hits him and splashes him underwater.)

Selene is balanced on top of a huge water spout.

Selene: Oh Aladdin! Wet kiss! (She blows a kiss, and he tries to swim away, but the magic encircles Aladdin, and begins to drag him down in a whirlpool.)

Aladdin: Whooooa!

Jasmine surfaces, and sees just Aladdin’s hand reaching out of the whirlpool. She begins to swim toward him.

Jasmine: Ugh! Ugh! Carpet! Help!

Carpet tries to spring into action, but before he can reach them, one of Armand’s tentacles grabs him. Armand also has Genie, Abu, and Iago now, and he begins to spin them like on a very large and fast merry-go-round.

Abu: Screeching

Genie: Ohhhh, Ohhhh, Ohhhh!

Aladdin is going under again, and Selene is surveying all of this.

Selene: Nobody dumps me! Nobody!

Aladdin: Ugh! (He goes under.)

Abu: Screeching

Armand squeezes Abu, who eyes bug out of his head. Genie turns into a woman, with a dress, blond beehive, earrings, and large red purse, which he begins to use to smack Armand upside the head.

Genie: You beast! You keep your hands to yourself, and I mean all eight of them!

Abu and Iago are grunting and struggling to get free from Armand’s tight grip on them. Carpet, since he is all wet, twists himself up, and then snaps himself on Armand’s sore head. Armand lets go of Abu and Iago, who go flying.

Iago: Yaaaaaaa!

Before they both land in the water, Carpet flies over and catches them, and takes off.

Abu:  (screeches “all right!”)

Genie is finally free, returned to normal and talking to Armand.

Genie: OK, Mr. Touchy-Feely! Let’s arm wrestle! (HE grows four more arms and reaches into the water for Armand, who is suddenly looking very worried.)

Down below, Aladdin has been dragged down by the vortex. We hear Selene’s voice as he goes farther down.

Selene: Welcome to my world, sweetheart! (She swims up to Aladdin, who is struggling to free himself from the whirlpool.)  And your precious Jasmine is next!

Up above, Jasmine is looking very cunning, and has a net that she throws into the water.

Jasmine: No Selene! It’s your turn!

She nets Selene.

Selene: Uh! Ow! Ugh!

Selene begins to struggle and thrash around in the net, but Jasmine has a firm grip on it, and begins to try to haul it to shore over her shoulder. Selene has lost her grip on the whirlpool though, which disappears, and Aladdin, freed, swims to the surface.

Aladdin:  (gasping for air)  Jasmine! (He begins to swim toward her.)

Selene is trashing more wildly than before.

Selene: Let me go!

Jasmine:  (waist deep in water, growls)  I don’t think so!

Aladdin: Jas- (Selene’s tail knocks him in the face, throwing him off)  Whoaaaaa!

Jasmine: Aladdin!

On the beach, Genie is standing there, dressed in waders, a red shirt, and a stupid hat with fishing lures stuck in it. He holds Iago in one hand, Abu in the other, and tied upside down behind him on a big display rack, is Armand. They are posing for a picture being taken by Carpet.

Genie: Everybody smile, say calamari!

In the water, Selene’s struggles get violent, and after a bit more thrashing about, she starts to swim off, in the net, with Aladdin and Jasmine holding on for the ride out to sea. Carpet continues to try to find the best angle for his photograph.

Selene: Ugh! Eeeeeee! Yaaaaa!

Jasmine: Ugh!

Aladdin: Genie!

They duo now looks like they are water skiing-they are standing on their feet, but holding onto the net with Selene as she tries to escape them.

Aladdin:  (to Jasmine)  Hold on!

Jasmine: Ugh, I’m trying!

Carpet finally snaps the picture. Genie holds both animals for a second, and then tosses them to the ground when he hears Aladdin’s voice. He zooms to him, leaving his fishing clothes behind.

Aladdin:  (off screen)  Genie!

Genie: Al?!

Jasmine and Aladdin are halfway back into the water now, still clutching the net. Selene is leaping out of the water, trying to shake them. She finally jumps high enough so that when she splashes back down, Jasmine and Aladdin knock heads, letting go of the net.

Aladdin: UGH!

Selene:  (throwing off the net)  You will seriously regret this indignity! You-

She is cut off suddenly we hear a deep pinging noise, such as like the radar on a submarine. Sure enough, here comes Genie, transformed into a submarine. He has come up under Selene, so she is perched on his turret. This is where is face is grinning at her. The periscope comes up next to her, changes into a hand, and grasps her.

Selene: Ahhhhh!

The hand throws her into an open door on the floor of the sub. A cannon hole opens in the front of the sub.

Genie: Fire one!

Aladdin, Jasmine, and Genie cover there ears as Selene shoots out the hole, skipping across the surface of the ocean on out of sight, screaming into the sunset.

Selene: Ah! Ah! Ah!

 Next scene 

On the beach, Abu is wringing out his fez. Out of nowhere, a hair drier sound is heard, and Abu is almost knocked off his feet by the wind. Genie has transformed his hand into a hair dryer, and begins to comb out Abu.

Genie: With your features, you could really carry this look.

He combs Abu out, all big and puffy. Abu does not look happy. Iago flaps up to Genie, annoyed.

Abu: Ohhhhhhhhhhh.

Iago: Can’t you style the furball later so we can get out of here!

Genie turns to him, directing the drier straight at Iago, which blows him right out of sight on the other side of the rocks.

Genie: Hmmmmmmm?

Iago: Yaaaaaaaaaaaa!

Genie looks pleased with himself, and turns back from watching Iago go.

Genie: There goes my three o’clock. Hey Princess, I just had a cancellation!

Aladdin: Forget it Genie! Huh, she’s perfect just the way she is.

Aladdin closes in to kiss her, messy hair and all. Then they cuddle to watch the setting sun.

THE END