How Resident Evil Should Have Ended


 * Zombies: (Growls)
 * Chris: Wesker...
 * 'Jill: You were behind all of this. You're just like the other things here. A slave to Umbrella.
 * Wesker: Smart girl. I've always been with Umbrella.
 * Chris: You son-of-a...
 * Wesker: The things you mentioned are nothing. Behold! The ultimate life form! What the?
 * Philips: Sir, I-I don't know how to put this but... we couldn't finalize the t-virus project.
 * Wesker: Dang it, Philips! Why the heck not? I'm in the middle of monologue here.
 * Philips: We're simply over budget, sir. These are tough times and quite frankly we've had to tighten the lab coat. I mean between the plant monster and the giant snake... and the sharks... I mean did we really need the zombie sharks? Great whites aren't cheap!
 * Chris: Okay, Wesker, enough.
 * Wesker: Guys, please just give me a second. (Sighs) Okay, what about independent financing?
 * Philips: Hollywood loves zombies!
 * Wesker: Right, they do.
 * Philips: And some hot-shot director named Anderson is interested in acquiring the rights to your life story.
 * Wesker: Paul Thomas Anderson? I love his work!
 * Philips: No, a Paul W.S. Anderson. Mortal Kombat??
 * Chris: NOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! Jill, use it!! Use it!!! Use iiitttttttttt!!!!!
 * Guy 2: Red and Alpha Team, I'm running out of fuel. If there's anyone alive. Just give me your sign. I repeat. This is your last chance.
 * Chris: I think we saved the world enough one day.
 * Jill: Chris. I've always felt...
 * Chris: Shhhhhh... I know...