Tobey's Masterpiece

Narrator:  It’s a normal day downtown, where Becky “WordGirl” Botsford gets ready for another difficult art class.

Becky:  Hey Bob, does this look like a bunny? (Her drawing looks more like a two-headed chicken. Bob looks at it from different angles, and scratches his head.) You could have just said no.

Ms. Champlain:  All right, class. I’d like you to close your mouths and open your hearts to our newest student-- Theodore McCallister the Third!

(Becky gasps)

Tobey:  Oh, Ms. Champlain, that’s so formal! We’ll all friends here. Please, call me Tobey!

Ms. Champlain:  Tobey? Ooh, that’s a fun name! Ha-ha-ha!

Tobey:  Yes, it is.

Becky: (whispering to Bob) What’s Tobey doing here?

Narrator: (whispering back) I don’t know.

Becky:  Uh, I’m talking to Bob.

Narrator:  (still whispering)  Oh, sorry!

Tobey:  Greeting, fellow artists! It is my pleasure to join your ranks, and be a part of the glorious future of art! (stops to look at Violet’s canvas) My, what a charming painting. I should have no problem being the best artist here! (picks up an easel) Oh, why Becky, hello. My word, it’s been such a long time. When was the last time we saw one another?

Becky:  When you tried to destroy my house with robots!

Tobey:  O-o-oh yes, my that was ages ago! (Sets up his easel where Bob’s is, knocking him over.)

Becky:  Wouldn’t you be more comfortable over there?

Tobey:  Well, although I’m not particular fond of you either, I don’t know anyone else here in class… pretty awkward!

Ms. Champlain:  Today, we are going to use our souls and our paintbrushes to bring to life the inner struggle and desires of this bowl of fruit.

Tobey:  Ha! A bowl of fruit? This should take me about five seconds. (to Becky) Prepare to witness the painting of… a  masterpiece !

Becky:  Uh-huh, great.

Tobey:  Peculiar… that doesn’t look at all like a banana.

Becky:  Yikes!

Tobey:  i don’t understand.

Becky:  I do. You’re just not that great at art. It’s okay, I’m the same way.

Tobey:  What? That’s preposterous! I, Theodore McCallister the Third, am good at everything!

Becky:  Except art.

Tobey:  There must be something wrong with this BRUSH! (Jams it through the canvas)

Ms. Champlain:  Ten more minutes..

Tobey:  Only ten minutes more?? But I’m nowhere close to painting my  masterpiece ! (Looks at Becky’s painting) Oh, thank goodness! Yours is actually more hideous than mine!

Becky:  Nope. Yours is worse!

Violet:  You guys, this isn’t a competition. But if it were, Becky’s is better!

Tobey:  Running out of time! (He gets an idea, and casually walks over to the window. Then he signals one of his robots, and hands it a paintbrush and an artist’s palette.) Here, paint a bowl of fruit immediately! (Tobey holds the canvas out while the robot paints.) Well done! Well, I know you’re all anxious to see my  masterpiece --well here it is! (He holds up a masterful portrait of the bowl of fruit.)

Ms. Champlain:  Tobey-- did you just have that robot paint that for you?

Tobey:  W-what? No, no!

Ms. Champlain:  Tobey, this is unacceptable!

Becky:  Looks like you painted yourself into a corner, Tobey!

Tobey:  I find these accusations insulting! I painted this  masterpiece !

Ms. Champlain:  No, you didn’t!

Tobey:  All right, but I created the robot that painted this  masterpiece , thus I myself am a great artist!

Ms. Champlain:  No, Tobey, it means that I will have to tell your mother you didn’t complete your assignment!

Tobey:  But-- Mother? Oh, I bet you’d like to, but you will never get the chance! You’ve seen how well my robot paints? Now let’s see how well it sculpts! (He presses a button on the remote.)

Becky: (whispering to Bob) We’ve got to stop that robot! Let’s get out of here!

Tobey: (grabbing Becky) You get a front row seat, art buddy!

Becky:  How thoughtful.

Tobey:  Now, my faithful robot! Turn that bus into a sculpture!

(The class watches at the window as the robot picks up the bus and lifts it into the air. But instead of demolishing the bus, it produces a paintbrush.)

Tobey:  Wait-- what are you doing?

(The robot paints elaborate designs on the outside of the bus, then sets it back on the ground.)

Tobey:  No, you fool-- destroy the bus! No, don’t paint, destroy! We talked about this! How dare you defy me! I’m your master!

Ms. Champlain:  Mister Robot, that is some mural!

Becky:  Eh, I guess I think it’s pretty!

Ms. Champlain:  I-I’ve never seen such artistic prowess from a student!

Violet:  What about me?

Ms. Champlain:  Um, from a student made of metal.

Violet:  Oh, metal.

Ms. Champlain:  You have truly created a glorious  masterpiece .

(The robot looks overjoyed, and acts humble.)

Tobey:  Well, I suppose it’s good, but it’s no  masterpiece !

Becky:  Sure it is! A  masterpiece  means a flawless example of skill or excellence, like that beautiful skyscraper. Or Bob’s haircut!

Ms. Champlain:  Here’s a shiny sticker. (Places it on the robot’s forehead. It blushes.)

Tobey:  That sticker should be MINE! Alright, that’s it, Mr. artist robot! Time to do what you’re supposed to, whether you like it or not! Berserker mode! (Presses a button on his remote, and the robot gets zapped with a charge of electricity. It starts pounding its chest rapidly, then starts moving around.) Oh, I love the sound of people  gasp ing in fear! It relaxes me.

Becky:  I think this is our cue! (Pulls Bob behind an easel.)  Word Up! (takes off)

Tobey:  Now, Ms. Champlain, I’ll ask you to please join me as I paint my real  masterpiece … ALL OVER THIS CITY! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

(The robot starts to reach through the window toward Ms. Champlain, but before it can reach her, WordGirl arrives and grabs its hand.)

WordGirl:  Your robot looks tired, Tobey! I think it needs a NAP! (She tosses it to the ground.)

Tobey:  Oh-ho-ho, WordGirl. How lovely to see you again. I admire your spirit, but can’t wait to see it run! (He presses a button and the robot is back on its feet.)

WordGirl:  Uh-oh! (It slams its hand against her and Huggy, propelling them backwards.) Whoa! (They land on a brick chimney.)

Tobey:  Ha ha!

WordGirl:  All right, robot! Prepare to be dismantled once and for all! Huggy?

(The robot jumps on top of a nearby building, and WordGirl flies around trying to distract it. Eventually it manages to grab onto both WordGirl and Huggy, then it falls off of the building.)

Violet:  Do you think WordGirl’s actually been--

Tobey:  Defeated? YES! You’re free to  gasp . (All of the class lets out a gasp.) (singing) I defeated WordGirl, I defeated WordGirl, la la, loo loo…

(They all go down to the street, and Tobey looks angry.)

Tobey:  Would you stop that? What’s going on here?

(The robot is sitting on the street painting WordGirl and Huggy.)

WordGirl:  We’re posing for his painting! We’re a spring flower. Apparently it’s abstract… I don’t get it.

Tobey:  This is unacceptable! You went against my commands AGAIN!

Ms. Champlain:  Now that is the power of art!

Tobey:  Oh, I’ve had enough of all of this! Robot, SMASH! (He presses a button on the remote, but the robot just looks over at him and continues painting.)  DESTROY! (It continues painting.)

Violet:  Maybe your remote’s broken.

Tobey:  It’s fine.

Violet:  Batteries dead?

Tobey:  I checked them this morning! (Walks over to WordGirl and the robot) Well, you three must think you’re so cute!

WordGirl:  Well, we’re kind of cute, yeah.

Tobey:  We’ll just see how cute you look after my SUPER robot gets through with you! (Holds up another remote)

WordGirl:  Uh, what’s that sound?

(The sound of a jet plane landing grows louder, and a huge robot lands in front of them.)

Narrator:  Now THAT’s a gas!

Tobey:  Meet my  masterpiece ... the--

WordGirl:  Wait, I thought the artsy robot was your  masterpiece !

Tobey:  My-- no, he’s-- he’s no  masterpiece ! He’s-- mediocre! Pedestrian! Second rate! (The artsy robot looks put off by Tobey’s comments.)

WordGirl:  No, I’m pretty sure you called him your  masterpiece .

Narrator:  I’ll check the tape.

Tobey:  Quiet, you! Regardless, you’ll have quite a difficult time defeating my super robot!

(He presses a button on the remote, and the robot starts dancing.)

Tobey:  Dah, I hit the samba button. (Everyone starts laughing. Then he presses another button, and a claw comes out. Everyone gasps.)  Alright, seriously? You people are very distracting!

(The two robots face off. The super robot flings the artsy one into the park, and WordGirl flies over to fight it. She knocks it as hard as she can, but it uses jets to stop itself and stand upright once again.)

WordGirl:  Okay, this robot IS a  masterpiece .

Tobey:  I told you! (to Ms. Champlain) Where’s MY shiny sticker?

Ms. Champlain:  I ran out!

Tobey:  That’s not fair!

WordGirl:  Alright, super robot! Time for a monkey attack! (She tosses Huggy at it, but he just smashes into it and falls off.)

Tobey:  Double tummy plate! Just installed it! I’ve fixed that little flaw.

WordGirl:  Good for you. (She throws large boulders at the robot, and even flies into space and drops a meteor on it, but it does no damage.) Artsy, your turn! (Artsy tosses the palette and paintbrush at the super robot.)  Is that all you got? (Artsy holds up a portrait he made of the super robot.) Pretty, but it’s not gonna help us at all!

(The super robot continues to approach Artsy and WordGirl.)

WordGirl:  You know guys, I don’t think we have enough firepower to bring this super robot down!

Tobey:  Just one push of this button-- my super robot will defeat you ALL! Ha-ha-ha-ha!

Narrator:  Will WordGirl, Captain Huggy Face and this very artistic robot be defeated by this super robot?

(Artsy holds his hand out to protect himself from the claw of the super robot, and in doing so he holds out the picture he painted. The super robot stops, seemingly fascinated by the image of itself. A tear emerges from its “eye” and drips down.)

Narrator:  Is that robot crying?

WordGirl: I guess so!

(It walks over to Artsy, pats him on the shoulder, then takes the painting and flies off.)

Ms. Champlain:  Now THAT is the power of--

Tobey:  Don’t say it!

Ms. Champlain: -- ART!

WordGirl:  Wow, Artsy, great job!

Tobey:  That’s it! You’re all going to pay! I shall end this once and for-- Where’s my remote?

WordGirl:  You mean this? (She holds it up.)

(Tobey gasps)

WordGirl:  Go ahead! Zap away! (crushes it)

Tobey:  Doh! Uh, ha-ha, WordGirl! My old friend! You’re not-- upset about the whole trying-to-defeat-you-with-my-little-harmless-super-robot thing, are you?

(Back in the art studio, all the art students, including Artsy the robot, are seen painting away on canvases. We then see that Tobey is posing for the painting wearing a “Little Boy Blue” outfit, with one finger pressed against his cheek.)

Tobey:  This is absurd, I will not stand for this--

WordGirl:  Actually, you kind of already are!

Ms. Champlain: (looking at Artsy’s painting) Oh my, it just keeps getting better and better! A true  masterpiece ! (She puts another gold star on his head, which is already covered with stars.)

Tobey:  I thought you said you ran out of stickers!

Ms. Champlain:  I bought more!

Tobey:  Oh, this couldn’t be more embarrassing! I hate art!

WordGirl:  I have to admit, I’m really starting to like it!

Narrator:  Well, that’s that! All neat and tidy. (laughs) Like that darling Little Boy Blue outfit!

Tobey:  Oh, stop it!

Narrator:  Be sure to tune in next time for another  gasp -inducing  masterpiece  of an episode--

WordGirl:  Nicely done!

Narrator:  Thank you! -- of WordGirl!