Midday Run

Kids, before you go to school, you want to see some art? I've already looked in the mirror once today, so I am good. (clicks tongue) Is this a trick? We say "sure" and then you moon us? No. You know that customer who always doodles on his napkins? Look what he drew yesterday. Bob: Oh. It's a fisherman. And he used the grease stain as a lake. That's a good use of grease. You know what, maybe we should put it up over here. Start a wall of customer drawings, right? Huh. A wall of napkin art. That's a good idea, Lin. It is a good idea, Mom. But you know what isn't? Putting your coffee mug so close to the edge of the counter. That's a piping hot cup of ouch. Thank you, Tina. Ugh, we get it. You're a hall monitor. Leave your work at school. Sorry. But all my hall monitoring is gonna pay off. I think Mr. Frond is about to promote me to the highest hall monitor rank there is. (majestic music playing) It's called Hall Manatee. Hall Manatee? Why is it called that? There are two schools of thought about that. No, never mind. I don't want to hear. Okay. Hi, Ms. Selbo. Signing in for hall monitor duty? You know, there's a rumor going around that you're up for a big promotion. Oh, don't listen to rumors, Ms. Selbo. (laughing): Then what would I do? Just answer the phone when it rings? Tina, come on. Here's your vest. Good luck, Mana-Tina. What? You didn't hear it from me. Hi, Tina. I-I went ahead and signed you in. That was thoughtful, Rudy, but it's against the rules to forge a signature on the sign-in sheet. Oh, yeah. The rules. I guess I played it pretty fast and loose. Yeah, let's save fast and loose for when you shake your caboose. Rules were made to be followed. Right, sorry. See, that's why you're gonna be a Hall Manatee and I'm stuck at Hall Minnow. Well, I'm also a Hall Minnow 'cause I'm bad at networking. Third period. Lunch is 40 minutes away. Kids are hungry and cranky, which means out in the hallway anything can happen. Got it. (panting) Oh, slow you didn't. Huh? I'm saying you weren't going slow in the hall. Slow you didn't? I should have been more clear. Sorry. Full name and grade? Danny Duszynski, fifth. Duszynski. Thank you, Danny. (quietly): You stupid... Whoa. What's that? Bye. Thank you. You're welcome. Whoa, he used language. No, I think he just said "thank you." Tina, can I just say it? You inspire me. (squeaking) I know. Hold on. I recognize that sound. It's butts on brass. Huh? Follow me. Louise: I love gravity! I'm glad I wore my fast pants! Hey, guys. You just slid into detention. Nice. I'm gonna need a full name and grade from both of you. (chuckles) I get it. Good psych-out, Tina. You scared us straight. Uh, full name and grade. I can't tell you my full name! You know Mom won't tell me my middle name! Geez, Tina, what are you, Narcy Narc and the Narcy Bunch? Fine. Louise and Gene Belcher. All right, off to class. And I'll see you at home. What's Mom making tonight? Anyone know? Good talk. Wow, that was cold-blooded. I guess when you're a hall monitor you have to leave your feelings in your locker. And lose the combination. Yeah... MR. FROND (over speaker): Hall monitors on duty, report immediately to Coach Blevins' office. Uh-oh. Let's move. Let me go. Dang. Ugh, Zeke. You called us, Mr. Frond? Ah, Tina. My star hall monitor. And Regular Sized Rudy. My fixer-upper hall monitor. I'll get there. Anyway, I stepped away from class to retrieve my shatterproof sports goggles... Rudy: Suh-weet. Thanks. When I got to my office, I found Zeke in here digging around. Trespassing in a teacher's office. This is strike three for you, Zeke. I'm afraid that means an automatic suspension. Uh, but I got a good reason. Save it. Tina, I want you to escort Zeke to the principal's office. I'd do it myself, but I dropped my cell phone in the toilet, and I need to put it in rice immediately. Has anyone tried that? Does it work? Ha! Mr. Frond's got a smell phone. (chuckles sarcastically) You're suspended. (groans) Tina, do you think you can handle this? I don't think you can handle how much I can handle this, Mr. Frond. Let's go, Zeke. (groans) I'll take it from here, Rudy. You finish your rounds. Are you sure? Zeke's trouble. It's a midday run. I could do it in my sleep. Yeah, but I want to help. I've never transported a perp. Yeah, we're good, Rudy. Oh. Oh, wow. Tina's giving Rudy some 'tude-y. (chuckles) Shut up, Zeke. I'm sorry I said "shut up." You shut up. Look what Teddy did! Funky pattern. I'm putting it up! Teddy: Spirals, right? Welcome to my brain. Look at mine, Linda. Aw, it's a sun wearing sunglasses. Someone's feeling silly. Guilty! Uh, here you go. Here's mine. Ah. Ooh. Yeah. What is it? It's a face. I don't recognize it. Well, it's no one in particular. It's just a face. Hmm. Could it be a foot? Oh, I see it now! It's a beautiful face. So are you going to put it on the wall? What? Yeah. S-Sure. Yeah, of cour... I'm gonna put it up. Wall. Well, it doesn't seem like you want to. Oh, here's a spot for it. Right there. Uh. Wait. Y... Lin, you're putting it behind the coffee machine. (laughing): Am I? Forget it. If... I-I don't want you to put it up if you don't like it. Okay. That was close. We were going to look at that thing every time they moved the coffee pot. Sorry, Teddy. Sorry it's not a spiral or a sun with sunglasses. Speaking of spirals... Whoa! Right? Oh, I'm dizzy! Another one's going up! Oh, my God. Put it... put it right there. Come on! The time doesn't fit the crime. You got to let me go! Enough, Zeke. You're the one who broke into the gym teacher's office.