Race with the Demon

So why am I always stuck in the back with the groceries? Somebody has to make sure the eggs don't break, dude. We don't even buy eggs! We have chickens! I know what you're up to, Jones! You always get to drive! I wonder why. Well, maybe because a giant turtle driving a hippie bus - seems a little suspicious! - [sighs.] All right, guys. I'd just like to have one peaceful trip to the store where the two of you aren't at each other's throats. [mellow rock plays on radio.] Now that's better. Peace and quiet. [engine revs.] [all yell.] A little chip 'n chase, huh?! Just pull over, Casey. Get out of the way! Nobody forces Casey Jones off the road! [snorting, snarling.] [all screaming.] Aah! [all groaning.] Ugh Everyone okay? Nobody forces Casey Jones off the road, huh? Ugh! Ugh! [honk honk.] [honk.] [title music.] Muurg has the jewel of Koweewah! Heh-heh. You'll never catch me, Crognard! [chortling.] What's this? Aah! [horse neighs.] Give me back my mystic jewel! Rah! Dude! That centaur doesn't stand a chance against Crognard the Barbarian! Announcer: WHYY breaking news! A word of warning for those planning on driving tonight Stay home! Reports are coming in of a mysterious driver running people off the road. That qualifies as breaking news out here? Back in the city, every driver's a reckless driver. Bring back Crognard! It was him! That's the maniac who nearly trashed us! - You ran into that nut?! - More like he ran into us! Over and over. We gotta get back out there and teach that guy a lesson! Casey, it's not worth it. Just be glad we're all okay Yeah, we're ugh mostly okay I got shell-lash trying to save all the food. A noble sacrifice, D! - Your neck okay, Donnie? - Ooh. Ooh, yeah, a little lower Aww, yeah, that's hittin' the spot! [Casey grumbling.] Casey: Hey, armpit, hand me the 1/4-inch socket. Sure thing, barf-a-roni! This baby is almost ready to roll, eh, Craang-breath? Kraang is with a "K," not a "C. " - Says who?! - The Kraang! That one doesn't count, come up with another C-word! Okay. Camel-face let's take her out for a test drive! [engine starts, backfires.] [engine purring.] You guys ready for Casey Jones to break some speed records? [engine revs.] - We're ready! On my mark - Pffft! Go! [wheels screeching.] Whoo-hoo! Amazing! - Casey's car is light-speed, yo! - Great time! You two knuckleheads actually pulled it off. I'm almost impressed. Umm He's not stopping, is he? - Doesn't look that way. - Grrr. Don't need a stopwatch to know this baby's fast! Best way to test her out is to find that road-creep! What a drag! The minute you're actually looking for a maniac, they're nowhere to be found. Aah! He's a mutant?! You! You're that kid that tried to stop me last night! [muzak playing.] [tires screeching.] Speed Demon's king of the road, baby! Whoo! Yeah! Oh, no. No! [muzak playing.] No! You rat! I'm gonna smash you all! Every stinkin' human on this road's goin' for a wild ride! Yeah! [evil cackling.] Whoa! Whoa! Not cool! Aah! [mutant cackling.] [breathing heavily.] [grunting.] [honk, honk, hoooonk.] Casey, you okay? Dude! What happened to your sweet ride? You trashed it! You went after that road maniac alone, didn't you? I thought I could take him! And besides, he's no road-maniac - he's a road-mutant! - Whoa! A mutant?! You totally ditched me I could have helped! That guy challenged me! It's the code of the road, man! Mano-a-mano! Come on. Let's get this scrap-heap back to the house. Huh? Hey, guys, check this out Don't touch that! Hmm Looks like some kind of mutagenic fuel. Fascinating! Must be mutagen still out there - Casey, are you okay? - What happened? Speed Demon 2, Casey Jones zip. You went after that guy? The cops can't catch him. Someone's gotta bring that mutant down! And that's gotta be Casey Jones, right? That's right, red. 'Cause I'm the only one that can. So, you find the problem with that clutch? I found part of the problem! [clucking.] Hey, Mikey! Keep your chickens outta the barn, man! Listen, Donnie. I'm sorry I went after Speed Demon without you. It's fine. Me and the guys have been making our own plan - to bring that freak down. - Donnie, you and I know the hot rod is the best chance we got. We need to team up on this. [sighs.] I don't know. I need your sweet scientific genius, Don. [singsong.] Please? All right, I have an idea. A crazy, awesome idea! [upbeat music plays.] This. Is. Amazing! Yeah, I know. And it's almost ready. I just have to figure out the problem with the artificial intelligence for the onboard computer system. [chicken clucking.] [keyboard keys clacking.] Here chick chick chick Where are you, little chicky chick chick chick? Oh, snap! - What?! - Holy toledo! [clucks.] Oh, not again! Mikey! Just what I need, another mutant! [clucking.] Whoa! What's she doing?! It's It's communicating with us! Those are complex equations! Maybe we don't need artificial intelligence. - Maybe we just need - Dr. Cluckingsworth, M. D. ! Uh, yes, maybe Dr. Cluckingsworth - M. D., bro. M. D. - Um, so, doctor? Can you interface with the hot rod's computer? [clucks.] [keypad beeping.] All right, Donnie, what are we doing here? I give you [engine starts.] [engine humming.] - The turtle racer! - Whoa. [clucks.] So your co-pilot is a chicken?! She's the onboard navigator! You guys really think this - car is gonna stop that maniac? - Without a doubt, Leo. With this baby, Casey Jones can't be beat! Well, that's it. You're gonna end up turning into street pizza. Street pizza? That's like one of my top ten favorite pizzas! Don't worry, April, with all the Kraang technology we put into the hot rod, it's one of the safest cars on the road. [clucking.] What was that? Oh, that's a highly volatile, radioactive mutagen egg. But don't worry. It's perfectly safe. Sorta. [whirring.] All right. We got the plan down, right? As long as you can keep up in that thing! [clucks.] [keys beeping.] What's wrong, doc? Guys, look out! Here he comes! Roger that, Casey! And remember, stick to the plan! [mutant chortling.] Ow-ow-owoooo! So ya wanna play chicken, eh?! [clucking.] Sorry, doc. [mutant laughing.] Whoo hoo! [chortling.] Aah! He's doing it again! He's ditching us! Nope, this time it's all part of the plan! [mutant laughing.] [chortling.] Huh? Bah! I'm gonna splatter you across the road! I'll grind ya in my grill like the bug you are! [cackling.] This'll slow ya down, freak! Aah! [mutant chuckles, restarts engine.] Okay! Uh. Whoa! Whoa! [yelling.] [muttering.] Aah! Oof! [squealing.] [deep, slow motion laughter.] Ugh. Casey We got him! That'll show ya not to mess with Casey Jones! Not so tough without your car, huh? - Huh?! - Where am I? What happened? What are you?! You're not a mutant? [whimpers.] Uhh Well, if he's not the mutant, that must mean the [engine revs.] [gasps.] [roars.] Aah! [car making chomping sounds.] Aah! [mutant groaning, shrieking.] [growling, snarling.] Aaaaahhhh! [cackling.] More mutant power! That's what I'm talking about! Ya like that? Yeah? Well, it's all me, baby! [shrieking laughter.] Donnie?! Yee hee hee hee hee! Whoo hoo-hoo-hoo! Yeah, baby! You stupid, ugly, pickle-headed [mumbling.] [chicken clucking.] if I could just start this thing up - What happened? - It's the car! The car is the mutant! It's alive somehow, and it's got Donnie! [engine starts.] Casey, wait! We need a plan! I got one! Get Donnie outta that mutant monstrosity pronto! How far is he, doc? [clucking.] [beeping.] Time to see what this baby can really do. [mutant laughing.] You again? [roars.] [tires screeching.] [mutant cackling.] [mutant cackling.] Let my friend go, freak! Or I'll take us both down! Never gonna happen, Casey Jones! Donatello belongs to Speed Demon now, baby! [mutant shrilly chortling.] [grunting.] Aah! You know, I'm a sporting guy. So how 'bout we race for it? You win, you get your friend back. I win, I get your super hot rod - and all that sa-weet technology! - Fair enough. And I get you, Casey Jones the only driver worthy of my competition. Well, I am super dope. [clucks.] It's a deal! First one to dead man's curve [ravens cawing.] wins. Starting now! [tires screeching.] Dudes, we need some faster wheels. - What are they doing? - Looks like a race to me. Is that hideous thing Donnie? [mutant cackling.] Yah! I can't pass him! Ow! Speed Demon's gonna win the race, the car, and a brand-new driver! Yeah, baby! Hang on back there, doc! [bah-buck.] Time to win this thing! [pop.] Bah-buuuck! [power up beeping.] Whoa! Goongalaa! All right, doc! Time for autopilot! [screen trilling.] Yaaaah! Hey, road freak! You're going down! [whipping sound.] Uh uhh uh! [sizzling.] Aah! [chicken clucks.] Where the heck did he go?! You're going down! Suck on this, sucka! [cackling.] See ya at the finish line, Casey Jones! I don't care about winning the race! I just want my friend back! [chicken clucks.] [keys clicking.] Ugh! Goongalaa! Aah! Ooh gah ehh - Ugh. - Donnie! You all right? I yeah, I-I think so. [engine revs.] I'm gonna chew you up and spit you out, Jones! [roars.] Oh, no. I got it this time, Casey! Yaah! Leave my friend alone! Aah! [mutant screams.] I'll Be Back! Whoo-hoo! Ow! The party wagon takes the win! Both: Yes! [whirring.] [chicken clucks.] You did good, too. I'm so glad you two are okay! And I'm so glad you're actually getting along! Thanks, red. Hey, Donnie, hw awesome was me grabbing your giant head, huh? So weird! Yeah, or when you used the mutagen-boost! - It actually worked! - Oh, that was the best! I thought you were gonna squash me on that one turn, bro! Hmph. I thought I was glad they're getting along. I know how you feel, April. [laughing, chattering.]