Pilot (We Bare Bears)

[Opening Intro]

[The episode begins with Grizzly watching a live-action video of a bear scratching his back against a tree.]

Grizzly: (Laughs.)

''[Grizzly takes a drink from a Diet Soda bottle. As some soda accidentally spills on his desk, he attempts to wipe it off with his arm.]''

Grizzly: (He laughs.) Hey Panda! (He burps.) Excuse me. Check out this guy! Hey, you gotta see this! Panda?

[Grizzly scoots his chair around the house, in an attempt to find Panda.]

Grizzly: Panda? Panda?

[Cut to Ice Bear inside of the fridge.]

Grizzly: Hey, have you seen Panda?

[Ice Bear lifts his shoulders, signaling an "I don't know."]

Grizzly: Hm.

''[Panda is heard in the distance, singing. Cut to Panda in the closet, playing with a guitar game controller.]''

Panda: *singing* Why did you sit on my heart, and hurt me so bad? Lady!

[Grizzly knocks on the door.]

Grizzly: Hey Panda, are you in the closet?

Panda: Um, no! No, nobody's here!

Grizzly: Why'd you lock the door, little brother?

Panda: I just need some alone time.

Grizzly: Is this- are you still bummed your internet girlfriend broke up with you?

Panda: No.

Grizzly: Panda!

Panda: Maybe.

Grizzly: (He groans.) You gotta let that go, man!

[Ice Bear is swinging his axe at the closet door.]

Grizzly: Cheer up! There are plenty of other girls out there! You're a Panda! You're cute. You're cuddly. You know kung-fu.

Panda: I don't know kung-fu!

Grizzly: Yeah, you know what I mean.

''[Panda scrolls through some texts on his phone while Grizzly tries to console him. Panda has texted "Hello?" several times to Susan, his ex-girlfriend, until Susan had texted back "It's over."]''

Grizzly: *muffled* Come on, Panda, let's go do something fun. You can just forget about that online lady friend, that are bad buds all around her, she's just broken inside, okay? Don't be a sucker, Pan-Pan.

Panda: You don't know my life!

Grizzly: I got it! We could take pictures of ourselves with record albums as our faces!

Panda: No!

Grizzly: We could shave our names on our backs again!

Panda: No!

Grizzly: Ice cream?

Panda: Chocolate?

Grizzly: Yup.

Panda: Triple scoop?

Grizzly: Sure.

Panda: Okay.

[Ice Bear throws his axe on the ground.]

Ice Bear: Ice Bear will drive.

''[The three bears walk out of the house and into a subway. An old woman looks up at Grizz, and Grizzly looks at her.]''

Grizzly: 'Sup.

''[Cut to the bears crossing the street, then on a sidewalk. A spider comes down from a nearby tree.]''

Grizzly: Spider!

[All three bears scream and jump back.]

Grizzly: I got this.

''[Grizzly blows on the spider, then Panda blows on it. Ice Bear accidentally gets the spider in his mouth. Grizzly and Panda scream, and they all walk backwards into a fence, breaking it. Ice Bear then spits out the spider.]''

Ice Bear: Ice Bear does not like.

Grizzly: Whoa, you guys, check it out! Some kid's having a birthday party!

Panda: Um, this place looks private. We should probably leave before someone calls the po-po.

Grizzly: Oh man, look! They that new dance video game! And a bouncy house! Oh! And a real fun slide! Guys, guys! We gotta crash this party! (Grizzly and Ice Bear begin dancing.)

Panda: Oh, what? No! I just wanted ice cream! Why is everything so terrible for me?

Grizzly: Panda, please! It's me, your big brother! Haven't I always taken care of us?

''[Cut to the Bears as cubs. Grizzly is playing the harmonica. Panda and Ice Bear are sitting in a box labeled "Hungry." A man passes by and gives them a hot dog.]''

Grizzly: Thank you! (He continues playing the harmonica.)

Panda: I'm vegetarian.

''[Cut to the present. Grizzly is pretending to play the harmonica.]''

Grizzly: Still got it!

[Ice Bear is kicking over trash cans in the background.]

Panda: Maybe if I just message her one more time, then she'll be my girlfriend again.

Grizzly: (snatching Panda's phone) Whoa, whoa, hey!

Panda: Whoa!

Grizzly: No more phone!

[Grizzly tosses Panda's phone to Ice Bear.]

Grizzly: Trust me, crashing this party is the exact thing you need to clear your mind. (While saying this, Grizzly is touching Panda repeatedly.)

Panda: Why must you always touch?

Grizzly: Now, all we need is to find a way to fit in. But what can we do to look more like them?

[Ice Bear creates an origami Frog using Newspaper he found in the trash.]

Grizzly: Aha! That's it!

Children: (They clap their hands together.) Goldilocks, goldilocks, let me-

Grizzly: Greetings birthday girl! We three bears are invited guests of the party, clearly because, our hats!

Panda: They're not fake!

Birthday Girl: Uh, welcome, I guess. Who are you?

Grizzly: Grizzly.

Panda: Panda.

Ice Bear: Ice. My name is Ice Bear. Brrrr.

Grizzly: A gift for you!

[Ice Bear gives the Brithday Girl a red balloon.]

Grizzly: Oh, it's nice to be here.

Panda: Hey, can I have my phone back?

Girl 1: I think they're eighth graders.

''[A montage of the bears at the party begins. The first scene involves the bears in a bouncy house, where their bouncing causes two kids to fly out of the bouncy house. The next scene shows the bears playing the dance video game. Ice Bear is waving his arms up and down, while Grizzly has grabbed Panda's arms in order to wave them up and down.]''

[Cut to the bears at a picnic table, where Grizzly is quickly eating several hot dogs and hamburgers, and Ice Bear is drinking from a punch bowl.]

''[Cut to the bears playing musical chairs with the children. The background music stops, and all of the children sit down before the bears. Ice Bear and Grizzly proceed to sit on the children.]''

''[In the next scene, Grizzly dives onto the fun slide, where he splashes water on the birthday girl and another guest. Ice Bear takes a photo of the incident using Panda's phone. Ice Bear scrolls through the photos on the phone, where it shows Grizzly playing "Pin the Tail on the Donkey", Ice Bear about to throw a water balloon on some kids, Grizzly about to hit a pinata, Grizzly gnawing on said pinata, Grizzly on the fun slide, and a photo of the kids, Grizzly, and Ice Bear. Throughout this whole sequence, Panda is not enjoying himself.]''

[Cut to the bouncy house.]

Grizzly: (He laughs.)

[The bouncy house deflates with the bears still inside.]

Grizzly: (He sniffs.) Smells like cake. (He sniffs.) Chocolate, (He sniffs once more.) triple scoop? What kind of cake is that?

[The bears lift the roof of the bouncy house off of them.]

Panda: [gasps] Ice cream cake!

[Pan down to reveal the kids, who are angry at the bears.]

Grizzly: Whoa! Hey there, friends! Uh, we would like some of your ice cream cake, please!

Birthday Girl: Who are you guys? Tell us now, or we're calling the po-po!

Grizzly: No po-po! No po-po! We're friends! We have cool hats, just like you!

Birthday Girl: We don't wear these hats 'cause they're cool. They're stupid. We're wearing them ironically.

Grizzly: We're wearing these ironically? I had no idea.

Ice Bear: Ice Bear knew.

Birthday Girl: Boo!

[A plastic fork is thrown at Grizzly, presumably from the Birthday Girl.]

Grizzly: Hey, what? Don't throw plastic forks, c'mon! Not cool, man!

''[The Birthday Girl shoves Panda, making him grunt. Panda is displeased.]''

Birthday Girl: You ruined the party!

[A boy shoves Panda.]

Boy 1: Yeah! Get lost!

Grizzly: Hey! Leave him alone!

''[Grizzly growls and claws at the boy. The boy begins to cry.]''

Grizzly: Oh, shoot! I'm sorry! It was an accident! Uh, sorry!

''[Ice Bear takes a picture of the incident using Panda's Phone. The boy runs away.]''

Boy 1: Someone call my mommy!

Birthday Girl: Get them!

[The children begin to throw forks at the bears.]

Grizzly: Hey! Watch it! Ah! Stop! Stop, friends, we just want to hang out and have fun! (Dodges a fork) Whoa!

[Ice Bear is deflecting all of the forks thrown at him.]

Ice Bear: Haha. Ha. Maybe. Nice try.

Panda: Why did you make us come here, Grizz? I should be at home in the closet crying over my girlfriend!

Grizzly: Internet girlfriend.

Panda: You don't know my life!

''[Grizzly backs into a tree. A spider is dangling from it.]''

Grizzly: Whoa! It's that spider!

Children: (They gasp.)

Grizzly: I got this.

''[Grizzly kicks the tree, only for more spiders to emerge from the tree. Everyone screams. The spiders head for the ice cream cake.]''

Birthday Girl: [screams] My birthday cake!

Panda: I'll save you, ice cream cake!

Grizzly: I got your back, Pan Pan!

''[All three of the bears run for the cake. They run onto the fun slide, where they form the bearstack. The slide allows them to reach the cake faster than the spiders. Panda grabs the cake once they reach it.]''

Panda: [laughs] It's all mine!

Spider 1: Uh, hey, excuse me. Why are we going for the cake?

Spider 2: Yeah, I don't even like cake!

Spider 3: I was just following you guys.

[Cut to the bears, who are sliding on the grass.]

Grizzly: Dudes, we gotta stop! Pump the brakes!

''[The bears come to a stop, but the cake flies out of Panda's hands. Everyone panics, except Ice Bear, who is eating grass.]''

Panda: No! *singing* Girl, why did you sit on my heart, and hurt me so bad, ice cream cake.

[The cake lands on the ground, and is ruined.]

Birthday Girl: Aw, man. It's all mush! We can't eat this!

Grizzly: We will always remember you, birthday cake.

''[Panda sheds a tear. Ice Bear takes the hat off of the Birthday Girl.]''

Birthday Girl: Hey!

[Ice Bear uses the hat as an Ice Cream cone, scooping some of the ice cream cake.]

Birthday Girl: (He gasps.) Whoa!

''[The Birthday Girl eats her ice cream. The other kids rush to get a scoop.]''

Boy 2: (Hugging panda) Thank you eighth grader. I love you. (Runs away)

[Panda smiles.]

Grizzly: And it all worked out! Thanks Grizzly! Oh, you're welcome!

Panda: Yeah, okay. I guess that was fun.

Grizzly: Aw, you're so cute when you're happy!

[Ice Bear feels Panda's phone buzz.]

Grizzly: Yeesh. It's your internet ex.

Panda: What does it say?

Grizzly: I think she wants to get back together, or something.

[Several smily faces and hearts have been sent by Susan, Panda's ex.]

Grizzly: What're you gonna do?

Panda: Meh. I need some alone time.

Grizzly: Yeah! (He hugs Panda.) Look at this guy, look at this guy!

[Ice Bear is clapping.]

Ice Bear: Congratulations.

Panda: (He sighs.) I just want to get my ice cream, and ditch this party!

[Panda notices all of the cake has been taken.]

Panda: What? Aw, come on! Man!

Grizzly: Hey! Little bros, it's cool! It's me, Grizzly. Haven't I always taken care of us?

''[Cut to a sidewalk, where Grizzly is pretending to play the harmonica. Ice Bear and Grizzly are sitting behind a sign that reads "Ice Cream?" A girl gives Panda a chocolate ice cream cone.]''

Grizzly: Still got it.

[Ice Bear prepares to take a group photo with his brothers.]

Grizzly: Wait for me! (Accidentally pushes Panda)

Panda: Whoa!

(As Grizzly enters the photo, he knocks over Panda's ice cream, which upsets him. The final photo shows Ice Bear with a neutral face, Panda frowning, and Grizzly making a funny pose.)