The Real Thomas: An Intern Special: Part 2

(The shocking music continues)

Mordecai: Dude, for real?

Nikolai: (Coughing his throat) Yeah, I am Russian spy.

(The shocking music starts again)

Rigby: Oh snap! Now we're all boned! And guess who didn't believe me. You and you and you and-

(Natalia punches Rigby)

Natalia: Silence rat!

Mordecai: But Thomas, how could this be?

Nikolai: I was born on the cold winter's night in Kiev (Flashback starts with a hooded person carrying Nikolai as a baby and place him outside of the door) But I was abandoned as a baby and declared property of the state. (One of the Russian military found him. Cut to Nikolai training) The K.G.B. raised me to be the perfect weapon, no family or loyalties except for mother Russia. (Cut to M.O.M.M. HQ) Some years ago I was embraced by a new mom. The Ministry of Meadow Management. A.K.G.B. Agency dedicated to park research and espionage. (Then we many children and people are not having fun at the not looking park) Russian park technology is decades behind the rest of the world. In the world theater, we are a laughingstock. What made american parks so good? We couldn't crack it. The order came from Commander Romanoff, Operation P.A.R.K.L.I.F.T. We would uptain bougus conditials and sneak into the states. I would become "Thomas", an average college student. We entered the US, with surprising little assistants. Phase 1: Travel through target site, inquire about entership opportunities, said I'll work for free, at the first chance possible, I would risk my life for the park, I would gain my co-workers trust. I would fade into the background. I would say to almost nothing. Phase 2: Make perorations for Phase 3. Execute Phase 4 orders, transmit phase 5 intelligence, relating to phase 6: silencing potential threats to Phase 7.

Benson: Huh? Well on some level that kindda flattering. We must be doing something right if Russia is swapping from our park.

Natalia: Darling. On the contrary.

(She pushes Benson away)

Nikolai: This park is astonishingly average. We plan on infiltrating other, like, way better parks if this trial succeeds.

Skips: It just doesn't add up. How did we never see you doing any of this?

Nikolai: I had my ways.

(Another flashback starts)

Flashback Skips: Okay, everybody got all their stuff. Let's save Christmas.

(They leave the house, as Thomas/Nikolai gets out)

Nikolai: Being an intern was the perfect cover.

(As they loading the machine, Thomas's watch beeps and he went back inside and get back stuck between the stairs, and put a Christmas declaration around his neck, as the others got back)

Flashback Benson: Thomas!

Nikolai: No one suspects the intern. We are the lowest rung on the ladder.

Flashback Thomas/Nikolai: Oh, you're in luck I know a guy in the rock climbing department.

Nikolai: Your low expectations kept you blind to what was right in front of you.

Flashback Benson: Hey are my favorite mother and son doing?

Thomas' Mom: (In a robotic voice) Fantasic Benson.

Flashback Thomas/Nikolai: Hey, Benson, could you tell me how the park electrical grid works again?

Flashback Benson: Sure. The first thing you got to know about is the breakers.

Flashback Thomas/Nikolai: Uh, could you talk into the pepperoni?

Flashback Benson: The first thing you got to know about-

(Flashback ends)

Rigby: So you're mom was Natalia in disguise.

Nikolai: No, no. She was a robot.

Natalia: (talks to someone on the earphone) Yes. Romanoff, we have them now. Yes. He's here.

Mordecia: Thomas, how could you do this to us?

Rigby: Yeah man.

Nikolai: It's my job guys.

Natalia: Goodbye.

Nikolai: Natalia, what did the commander want?

Natalia: That's on a need to know basis, Nikolai. Let's move.

(Cut back to spies at the house)

Russian Spy #1: We just want validate units. We have certificate.

Muscle Man: Uh, we don't need any bro.

(The spies gets the column and tries to break the door down twice, as they tried to knock it down the third time, Muscle Man opens the door, and they they went in and got hurt, and Muscle Man knocks him out)

Muscle Man: Let's find Mordo and Rigs.

(They run to find Mordecai and Rigby, but they see something)

Muscle Man: Get down!

(They see the heroes tied up and then a van shows up)

Anatoly: Anatoly. Pleased to make acquaintance. Special delivery.

Natalia: Get in van!

(Thomas reveals a control box from his duffel bag)

Rigby: (gasps) I knew it!

(Thomas puts his thumb on the control box)

Computer: Identy verified. Welcome Nikolai.

Thomas: Arming system. (he presses a button and the whole park is scanned) Perimeter armed and secure. Anatoly, did you pick out an album?

Anatoly: Covered, boss. (he walks off to put a mixtape in the van)

Thomas: Phase 8 in 10, 9, 8...

Rigby: What's Phase 8?

Thomas: 7, 6, (the 1991 Russian National Anthem plays through some speakers), 5, 4, 3, 2, 1! (he presses two buttons, there are multiple explosions on the ground, church domes, Russian icons and CCCP rockets grow through the ground, some police cars are seen driving towards the park, but stop as it flies into the air, it begins to fly towards Russia)

(everybody but Thomas, Natalie and Anatoly scream)

Thomas: We are headed to mother Russia, there, you will be put into a hard labor camp. Forced to do unskilled, demeaning labor for the rest of your lives! (the music ends) Which, come to think of it, isn't too different from your lives now.

Natalie: Nikolai! New orders from Romanoff!

Thomas: I'll be up top, controlling the park!

Natalie: We must get in the chopper!

Thomas: Anatoly will ensure your safety on the ground! (Thomas jumps into the chopper)

Rigby: We gotta stop this!

Mordecai: Set us free!

Anatoly: Set you free? I'll set you free, at bottom of sea! (he laughs)

(everybody screams)

(cut to a summit between the Americans and Russians)

Guy: Mr. President, sir! Something you need to see, sir! It's a matter of national security! (he shows him a tablet showing the park moving towards Russia) Our radars have detected a hgiant land formation, flying towards the Russian border!

President Davis: What? What does this mean?

McMurphy: I'll tell you what this means! The Russians are stealing a piece of America!

Premier Koshkov: What? You insult us with these accusations!

Guy: I'm afraid we're going to have to take action, sir! If our land reaches their border, the Russian military will intercept it and we'll never get it back!

(the two country leaders stare at eachother)

(cut to the van)

Anatoly: Ahahaha!

(Rigby uses the sprinkler he found and cuts off his rope)

Rigby: Shh!

(Anatoly looks in the mirror)

Anatoly: HEY!

(Skips breaks the ropes)

Anatoly: Stop trying to escape! Tie yourselves back up!

(Then they hear a horn and look back to see Muscle Man and High Five Ghost driving the cart)

Rigby: Muscle Man & Fives!

Anatoly: What? No! Stop trying to rescue them!

(Rigby opens the door)

Rigby: Muscle Man!

Muscle Man: You gotta jump for it bros!

Anatoly: No! Don't jump for it, bros!

(Benson jumps to the cart)

Anatoly: AAAARG!! Stop jumping for it! I'm gonna get fired!

(Mordecai jumps to the cart as Muscle Man steps on the breaks as the Russian driver in the van falls down)

Anatoly: I've should have step on brake break before going off this clii...(goes underwater and kills him)

Muscle Man: He's got a point.

Skips: So what's the plan now? How do we stop this thing?!

(They look up the chopper. Inside Nikolai was stilling holding the control box controlling the park)

Rigby: I bet if we can take that control box away from Thomas, we can turn the park around.

Mordecai: But how do we catch that chopper?

Pops: I know how.

(Mordecai, Rigby, Benson and Pops are all in Carmenita driving up to the chopper, the screen cuts to two American commanders)

Commander: Status report, private!

Private: At this rate, the landmass with reach Russian airspace within the hour, sir!

Commander: Great Scott!

(cut to Thomas and Natalie in the chopper)

Thomas: As an intern, I was pranked mercilessly, those Americans could be jerks!

Natalie: Well you don't have to worry about that now, because they're dead!

Thomas: What? That wasn't part of the plan! Nobody was supposed to get hurt!

Natalie: Well, it became part of the plan!

(Thomas hears Carmenita's horn, looks behind him and sees that Mordecai, Rigby, Benson and Pops are in the car)

Thomas: They're behind us!

Benson: Come on, Pops! Bring us in, close!

(Pops drives closer to the chopper, Mordecai, Rigby and Benson jump out while Pops drives off, Natalie starts to clap slowly again)

Natalie: Two slow claps in one day! Must be doing good, Americans! But not good enough!

Benson: You're not stealing our park!

Natalie: You don't know how right you are!

Thomas: Yah-uhh-what?

Natalie: We are not stealing it! I wonder if you remember US/Russian Nuclear Arms treaty! Treaty says we cannot fire Russian weapons on American soil. This is rule. But, what if we don't fire Russian weapon at all? What rule do we break then, huh?

Rigby: What are you saying?

Natalie: Even now, we approach the Mother Land! On coast is secret missile base! They will give order and the most powerful destructive missile in Russia, will be placed right in the park's fight path! And thustly, we bring America to missile!

(cut to the summit, everybody is complaining)

President Davis: This is an act of aggression!

Clifton: Admit it! You're going to blow up America piece by piece!

Premier Koshkov: We cannot help it if Americans are throwing their country onto our warrants! Typical act of American Passive Aggression!

President Davis: This is a violation of the treaty!

Premier Koshkov: Oh, we aren't firing any missiles!

Romanoff: Why are you hitting yourself, America?

McMurphy: Well, he's got us there, Mr. Davis!

President Davis: Wait, aren't you blowing up part of your own country in the process?

Premier Koshkov: Meh, it's a big country!

(everybody complains)

(cut back to the chopper)

Thomas: I can't believe this! Natalia, I never wanted to hurt anyone! All I wanted was to build a park!

Natalie: Maybe they will use rubbell of old park to build new park! Ha-ha-ha!

Benson: Grr! Natalie, I'm sorry, but you're taking this too far! This ends now! (he throws his fist towards her, but she crunches it) Ow-ow-ow-ow! First my heart and now my hand!

Rigby: Thomas! Come on, man! I know you're a Russian spy but you're also our friend! You must have enjoyed yourself a few times!

Thomas: Maybe, yeah!

(Natalie slaps him.)

Natalie: Do not be a fool, Nikolai! They treated you like dirt! (she slaps him) Lower than dirt! (she slaps him again)

Thomas: You're right. I know interns have terrible lives but come on! I barely felt comfortable speaking around you guys! Why do you think I never said more than four or five words at the time!

Rigby: We thought you were just boring! Try to remember dude! We had some good times!

Thomas: Good times. (Thomas begins to remember) But all of my years training! I-I can't.

Rigby: Dude, you risked your life to save us! You saved our park!

Thomas: I did, but-

Benson: And not just that, Thomas. I never got a chance to tell you earlier, but we were going to ask you to join the park full-time today.

Rigby: Yeah, man! We didn't want to see you go! You're our buddy. Doesn't that mean anything to you?

Thomas: Yah, it does. Being buddies means something! And the park means something!

Natalie: Nikolai! What are you doing?

Thomas: I'm turning the park around, you used me, Natalia! These guys may not be perfect, but they're the only friends I've got.

Mordecai: Yeah! Way to go, Thomas!

Natalie: No! (she kicks Thomas in the face, the pushes the park closer to Russia, Thomas runs towards her, but she kicks him off, she kicks him in the face, but Thomas trips her over, Thomas goes to turn the park around)

Thomas: Come on!

Natalie: Imperialist Dog! (she runs towards him)

Mordecai: Thomas! Look out!

Natalie: No! (she kicks Thomas into the controls, tilting the chopper, she falls into the ocean, where a whale eats her)

Benson: Natalie!

Mordecai: Dude! She tried to kill us!

Benson: I think we could have worked it out!

(the control box falls out)

Thomas: The control box!

Rigby: I'm going for it!

(he jumps out)

Mordecai: Rigby!

Rigby: (slow-motion) No! (he goes to grab the control box, but at the same time Thomas grabs him) Thomas! You saved my life!

Thomas: No time! Hit the red button!

Rigby: Agh! (he hits it and the park stops just before it would have hit the missile)

(music plays as the summit is shown, the Russians are all looking angry, while the Americans are celebrating, the park turns around)

Navy Men: USA! USA! USA!

(the park crashes back down in its original location)

Everybody: (coughing) USA! USA! USA! OOOHHHH! (they all laugh)

Benson: Awesome work, Thomas!

Thomas: No problem! And thank you all for showing me that friend matter more than a silly KGB job!

Benson: You know, the offer still stands, we'd love to have you work at the park.

Thomas: I'd love to, but, once a spy, always a spy.

Rigby: Also, you're pretty much a traitor in both countries.

Thomas: Pretty much, yeah.

Pops: Is this the end of Thomas?

Thomas: The end? Heh-heh! No! I will forever be on the run. Living on the land, hiding in the shadows, forever watching, forever listening, like some, land-living, shadow-hiding, watching, listening guy. Oh look! The sun is rising. (he looks behind him at the park workers) Thank you all.(he runs off, knocks out a CIA Agent then jumps into the bushes)

Rigby: Dasividaniya, Nikolai. You'll always be Thomas to us.

(The End of 'The Real Thomas'