The Neighbor


 * I don´t know dude, I don't think this camouflage is working, and it's getting really hot in this.
 * What? I thought it might snow.
 * It's June.
 * Why are we doing this anyway?
 * Because it's getting embarrasing. We keep bumping into our neighbor and we don't even know his name.
 * You mean Mr. Robinson?
 * No, the other one.
 * Mrs. Robinson?
 * No, the guy who lives on the other side, you know.
 * A really small person playing a normal-sized piano? A normal-sized person playing a really tall piano? Someone big... who...the sky tickler!
 * No, him!
 * Oh, yeah. No, I don´t know that guy's name.
 * Exactly, we don't know it and we're running out of ways to get away with it.
 * Hey Gumball, Darwin.
 * Hello...sir.
 * Come on now, I've known you for years, you don´t need to call me sir. You can call me by my name.
 * Yes we can, and we will definitely do that... next time.
 * Oh, gosh darn it.
 * Look out, Mister....uhh, mister...mister...uhhh...
 * Mister...
 * Mister mister? Mister...uhh, mister? Mister [???]
 * Oh man, I wish I knew his-
 * We'd better call him the paramedics.
 * Why? I´m pretty sure the paramedics is not his name.
 * No, I mean call a doctor.
 * I don't wanna be awkward when they ask us what he's called.
 * And here to talk about his job is the town's mailman, mister-
 * Maybe we should have waited. Principal Brown was about to tell us his name.
 * Yep, I panicked.
 * Yeah, remember this time? This was really awkward.
 * This isn't a flashback.
 * Wait up, I got a package for ya!
 * No, I mean call a doctor.
 * I don't wanna be awkward when they ask us what he's called.
 * And here to talk about his job is the town's mailman, mister-
 * Maybe we should have waited. Principal Brown was about to tell us his name.
 * Yep, I panicked.
 * Yeah, remember this time? This was really awkward.
 * This isn't a flashback.
 * Wait up, I got a package for ya!
 * Yeah, remember this time? This was really awkward.
 * This isn't a flashback.
 * Wait up, I got a package for ya!
 * Wait up, I got a package for ya!

Awkward Delivery

 * We can't avoid it any longer. We're going to have to ask him his name.
 * Are you insane? you're forgetting about the window.
 * Uh-uh. I am not jumping through anymore windows. I'm still finding bits of window frame in my gills from the last time.
 * No, I'm talking about the brief window of opportunity where it's socially acceptable to ask someone what their name is. After the third time you've met someone, that window closes. And every time you see them after that, the window gets another lock on it, another bolt, another shutter. At this point, our window with that guy would be harder to open than a ski store in the Sahara.
 * What about your package?
 * What's he trying to deliver, anyway?
 * It's probably for me. I don't know that guy's name, either. I've just been avoiding him by not leaving the house and getting everything delivered.
 * But isn't he the mailman?
 * I didn't think it through.
 * And what's with the jars? You don't need to leave the house to go to the bathroom.
 * Didn't think that through, either.
 * Right, we need to find out his name without him realizing.
 * Hey, Gumball.
 * Hello, misterrr...
 * Okay, Gumball, just keep going until you see a look of recognition on his face.
 * ...Smith...Brian...Peter...Sam...White...Steven...Son...Da-David...
 * I´m so sorry about my friend, Mister, uh...man...
 * I guess I'll just leave it with the others.
 * I´m so sorry about my friend, Mister, uh...man...
 * I guess I'll just leave it with the others.

The "Perfect" Crime

 * Isn't it illegal to go through someone's mail?
 * What's worse, being locked in a prison, or being locked in a prison of social awkwardness?  Jackpot!
 * Isn't it weird that a mailman leaves mail in his own mailbox?
 * I guess some people don't like to take their work home with them.   To the occupant, to whom it may concern, to the resident, to the homeowner, to the bill payer, for your attention, sir, madam, sir, to the birthday boy? Ah, come on!  What are you doing?
 * Destroying the evidence.
 * But we could've just put it back in the mailbox!
 * Good idea. The perfect crime.
 * Good idea. The perfect crime.

Sign Here, Please

 * Excuse me, would you like to sign our petition?
 * Uh, I'm sorry, I don't have time to-
 * Thank you for stopping, please sign here.
 * Um, I don't really-
 * Hey, if you can just write your name, please. Full name, nice and clear, black capitals, big as you can.
 * What's it for?
 * Uh, the mayor is gonna knock down the library to build a...
 * A hospital.
 * Oh. That doesn't sound so bad.
 * Yeah, but then he's gonna knock down the hospital to build a...
 * An orphanage!
 * Again, not so bad.
 * But then he's gonna knock down the orphanage and build a...luxury apartments! Luxury apartments.
 * That's terrible! Give me that! No, wait, we need direct action, and we need it now!
 * It's the mayor here. I've got an idea. We're gonna knock down the library and build a hospital. No, no, that's just step one.
 * It's the mayor here. I've got an idea. We're gonna knock down the library and build a hospital. No, no, that's just step one.
 * It's the mayor here. I've got an idea. We're gonna knock down the library and build a hospital. No, no, that's just step one.

Rushed Romance

 * Morning.
 * Hey!
 * What the-
 * Okay, wedding vows! Go!
 * Uh, I hereby state that I, Alison Sandra Gator, do take you as my lawful wedded husband.
 * Okay, your turn! Go!
 * Uh... I hereby state that I...
 * Yes!
 * I...
 * Yes!
 * I...
 * I think this is all happening too fast!
 * Gosh darn it!
 * People say you're meant to mourn a relationship for half the amount of time you were together. I'm done.
 * I...
 * I think this is all happening too fast!
 * Gosh darn it!
 * People say you're meant to mourn a relationship for half the amount of time you were together. I'm done.
 * People say you're meant to mourn a relationship for half the amount of time you were together. I'm done.

Mail for the Mailman

 * Package delivery. Sign here.
 * What? But I'm the mailman for this neighborhood. Why didn't anybody tell me I'd been replaced? Decades of experience: worthless. Thrown in the scrap heap like garbage.
 * Yeah, if you could just, uh-
 * How am I gonna find another job at my age?
 * Sign here.
 * Did we get it?
 * Nope, nothing makes handwriting harder to read than an old man's tears.
 * And I already got one of these!
 * Nope, nothing makes handwriting harder to read than an old man's tears.
 * And I already got one of these!
 * And I already got one of these!
 * And I already got one of these!

The Discovery

 * There must be something we haven't tried.
 * I've been braining so hard my think hurts.
 * Wait, I know! If we had amnesia, we could tell him we forgot his name and it wouldn't be embarrassing.
 * Great! How do you get amnesia?
 * We hit each other on the head.
 * Wait, how are we gonna remember that we tried this?
 * Write it on your arm.
 * Hm, that explains the headache.
 * Hey, you two. That guy on your poster.
 * You know his name?
 * Let's just say he's an "old friend."
 * and : Hello. Harry Gedges.
 * Who told you that was my name?
 * Pfft, we've always known it. Obviously.
 * Who told you that name?
 * Uhh, those guys?
 * They found me. I don't know how, but they found me.
 * Pfft, we've always known it. Obviously.
 * Who told you that name?
 * Uhh, those guys?
 * They found me. I don't know how, but they found me.

Evading the Agents

 * Wait, what's wrong with calling you "Harry Gedges," Harry Gedges?
 * Because that's my real name!
 * Yeah, we know it is, Harry Gedges.
 * Ooh. I don't mind.
 * Like we're always saying, "good morning Harry Gedges," "how are you doing Harry Gedges," "happy birthday Harry Gedges."
 * Stop saying it!
 * Why, Harry Gedges?
 * That's not the name I've been using.
 * What do you mean, Harry Gedges?
 * I've been living under a pseudonym for the last twenty years!
 * Looks more like a fedora, Harry Gedges.
 * Not my hat! A pseudonym is a fake name! It was given to me by the witness protection people when they moved me to Elmore for my own safety.
 * Why, Harry Gedges?
 * I testified in court against some very bad people. And ever since then, I've had to live under the fake name that you know me by.
 * Which is mister...B-
 * No! We don't know your name, alright? tell us what it is.
 * Wait, you don't know my name? We've been neighbors since you were born. If my life wasn't in immediate danger I'd be really hurt right now. It's Gary Hedges.
 * I'm outta here.
 * So let me get this straight. Real name is Harry Gedges, and your fake name is Gary Hedges? That's not very imaginative.
 * I didn't choose it! Okay, there's no way those guys could have followed us.
 * Who, those guys?
 * "Do you know this man? He lives at ten twenty-four York Street. Here's a map. This is the house. If the front door is locked there is a key under the gnome."
 * How on earth did they find out where I live?
 * and : Uh, lucky guess?
 * Then I got no choice. I'm gonna have to skip town and leave behind my new life and beautiful home.
 * I think beautiful's overselling it.
 * Dude, not the time!
 * Yeah, sorry. Ah! I got it. You don't have to skip town if they think you're
 * I don't think pretending he's a duck is gonna help.
 * No, they'll leave if they think he's already kicked the bucket. I know exactly what to do.
 * I didn't choose it! Okay, there's no way those guys could have followed us.
 * Who, those guys?
 * "Do you know this man? He lives at ten twenty-four York Street. Here's a map. This is the house. If the front door is locked there is a key under the gnome."
 * How on earth did they find out where I live?
 * and : Uh, lucky guess?
 * Then I got no choice. I'm gonna have to skip town and leave behind my new life and beautiful home.
 * I think beautiful's overselling it.
 * Dude, not the time!
 * Yeah, sorry. Ah! I got it. You don't have to skip town if they think you're
 * I don't think pretending he's a duck is gonna help.
 * No, they'll leave if they think he's already kicked the bucket. I know exactly what to do.
 * No, they'll leave if they think he's already kicked the bucket. I know exactly what to do.

The "Death" of Gary

 * Genius!
 * Oh no, I was just cleaning the windows and now I have lost my balance! I hope there is no tragic consequence!
 * Ha! It worked! Throwing that dummy out of the window was a great idea! Now I get to keep my life and my beautiful home!
 * Yeah, it wasn't supposed to fall out of the window. It was meant to look like you were in the house when it-
 * This might not be the best time to ask, but, would you rather we call you Harry Gedges or Gary Hedges?
 * I'd rather you never talk to me again.
 * Yeah, it wasn't supposed to fall out of the window. It was meant to look like you were in the house when it-
 * This might not be the best time to ask, but, would you rather we call you Harry Gedges or Gary Hedges?
 * I'd rather you never talk to me again.
 * I'd rather you never talk to me again.