Coach Steven

[Open Ext. Gem Communication Hub]

(The Gems warp into the Gem Communication Hub.)

Steven: *looks up amazed* Woah! What magical place of mystery is this?

Amethyst: Well— *tries to explain but gets interrupted by Pearl*

Pearl: Oh, I'm so glad you asked! This was once a communication hub for Gem-kind. But lately, *walks over to pillars* it's begun transmitting bursts of electromagnetic interference!

Steven: *to Garnet* Whazzat mean?

Garnet: *puts hands on hips* It's hurting television.

Steven: Noooooooo! I'll save you television! Ha-yah! (Steven tries to damage one of the pillars.)

Amethyst: *lifts Steven* Sorry, but we need a Steven at least... (She shapeshifts into a stronger looking Steven with a deeper voice.) THIS strong for this job!

Steven: *gasps* It's all the me I could be!

(Amethyst puts Steven down, and attempts to destroy the pillar.)

(Pearl catches a small piece of the pillar punched off by Amethyst.)

Pearl: Amethyst, we could be here all day taking out these pillars individually.

Amethyst: Ugh, I hate it when you're right. You get this look on your face... *looks at Pearl's face* Yeah, that's the one.

Pearl: What we need is a well thought out plan— (Her gem starts to glow to project a hologram.)

(Garnet interrupts.)

[Camera zooms in on Garnet's face]

Garnet: No. What we need is Sugilite. Amethyst, fuse with me.

Amethyst & Pearl: WHAAAT?!

(Amethyst begins to scream in excitement and Pearl looks confused and angry.)

Amethyst: Yeah! Let's mash it up! Bigger, badder, better! Ohohohohoho! *twirls around*

Steven: *confused for a while, then asks excitedly* Hold your horses! Are... you guys going to become a Gem Fusion?

(Amethyst replies excitedly with a scream, both Amethyst and Steven scream in excitement.)

Pearl: *interrupts* WAIT! *pauses* Garnet, think about this. You and Amethyst can be a little... eheh... unstable when your personalities combine. We need to be careful! Fuse with me, instead.

Garnet: *holds Pearl's shoulder* We don't need to be careful. We just need to be huge.

Amethyst: Oh, yeah! Let's wreck this joint! *gets into position*

Garnet: *gemstones glow* Synchronize.

(Garnet and Amethyst's fusion dance begins.)

Steven: (Pearl blushes and covers Steven's eyes.) Wha-? Whu-? Pearrrl... Come on! I wanna see!

(Garnet and Amethyst fusion dance continues, fusing together and forming Sugilite.)

Sugilite: Hahahahaha! *laughs and cracks knuckles* I forgot how GREAT it feels to be me!

Steven: That's Sugilite?

Sugilite: You got it, baby. Hey, Steven. Wanna see something cool?

Steven: Yeah!

(Sugilite fuses Garnet's gauntlets and Amethyst's whip, forming her flail.)

Steven: *gasps loudly in amazement*

Sugilite: You like that, little man?

Steven: Are you gonna smash stuff with your wrecking-ball-thingy?

Sugilite: That's the plan! Where should I start?

Steven: Do that one! *points to a pillar*

(Sugilite proceeds to smash pillars.)

Pearl: Steven, I think we should go.

Steven: No way! This is awesome!

(Sugilite smashes more pillars, causing debris to fall everywhere. )

Pearl: Watch it! *kicks a rock, breaking it in half* 

(A small rock hits Steven in the face.)

Pearl: Steven! *to Sugilite* Ugh, you're just too much!

Sugilite: Maybe you're just too LITTLE!

Pearl: Steven, we're going! *picks Steven up*

Steven: What? I'm fine! What about Sugilite?

Pearl: She can find her own way home!

Steven: Awww...

(Pearl and Steven warp away just before a huge rock destroys the Warp Pad.)

[Trans. Int. Big Donut]

Steven: 'Sup? (Steven enters the Big Donut wearing sunglasses and a big roll of gauze wrapped around his head.)

Sadie: Whoa! Steven, what happened to you?

Steven: Oh just a little battle damage from our last mission.

Sadie: Really?

Lars: Like what?

Steven: I got hit by a rock! (Steven takes off his gauze, showing Sadie and Lars a tiny cut.)

(Both Sadie and Lars laugh at Steven's "battle damage".)

Sadie: It must not have been a very big rock.

Steven: Well... there's... internal... bleeding. My hurt is on the inside!

Lars: Toughen UP, Steven!

Steven: You're right. I'm soft. *takes long strip of wrapped gauze off*

Lars: If I weren't so modest, I'd whip out my sweet six-pack. (Lars struggles to open a can of sardines.) And show you what a real man... looks like! *grunts* (Sadie offers to open the can and opens it with ease and hands it to Lars.) Nah... I'm not gonna say thanks. (Sadie punches Lars's leg.) Aha... aha....

Steven: That's it! We all need a workout! Let's do it! Let's workout together! *to Sadie* You can beat up Lars *to Lars* and you don't have to starve to death if Sadie divorces you!

Lars: *muffled* We're not MARRIED!

Steven: And I know just the guy to help us out.

[Trans. Ext. Beach House]

Steven: Wow! This looks great!

Greg: Huh? Wha... ? *wakes up from nap*

Steven: Hey, dad!

Greg: Hey, Steven. You like it? It's the best I can do on such short notice.

Lars: *picks up a dumbbell made of cans which falls apart* No kidding.

Greg: Well I might join you kids show you how it's done! I've been slacking off on my workout routine for few weeks... months... years... *coughs* decades.

Steven: Sure! The more the meatier! Oh! We'll need sweat bands! (Steven runs up to the Beach House.)

(Pearl walks over to the gym.)

Greg: Hey Pearl. Come to check out some buff studs?

Pearl: (Pearl looks Greg over.) No. *walks up to the Beach House* Steven, what on earth are you up to?

Steven: We're starting a gym! *flexes* Imma get supa strong! Like Sugilite!

Pearl: You know, maybe this isn't a good idea.

Steven: What? I wanna be strong so I can be useful to the team!

Pearl: There are different ways of being strong...

Steven: But I want to be strong in the real way. Come on, Pearl. *puts on sweatband* Let's get beefy! (Pearl blushes angrily.)

Pearl: I'd rather not. *enters the Beach House*

(Pearl sings Strong in the Real Way as she picks up Steven's clothes, as Steven is looking through the window at her. Pearl walks to the window and sees everyone working out, she then pulls down the blinds as she didn't want to say that she is jealous. After Pearl finishes singing, Steven turns up the volume of his stereo and talks into his megaphone. Steven: "who is ready to get buff ? I don't wanna see your gut, i wanna see your guts!"  and looks up at Pearl, as they make eye contact she goes back inside, Steven then continues singing the song his own way, finishing with everyone tired from working out.)

Sadie: Hey, Steven. Maybe um... you can work out a bit, too?

Steven: Uh-huh? I have been.

Lars: We've been working out. you've just been singing some dumb song.

Greg: But you're doing a great job pumping us up!

Steven: Thanks! But I need to get strong, too. I'm switching to four-wheel drive! *puts on four tires and runs around*

[Time Skip—early the next morning]

(Sadie, Lars, and Greg are all waiting outside the Beach House for Steven.)

Sadie: Steven, come on! We're ready to get started! We can't work out without your mad coaching skills!

[Trans. Int. Steven's Room]

Steven: *groans in pain* Be there in a sec! (Steven proceeds to go down the stairs.) So sore from getting ripped...

Pearl: I don't understand. Amethyst and Garnet still aren't back yet. I tried to warp back and check on them, but the Warp Pad's down!

(Suddenly, the ground starts to shake and outside voices can be heard.)

Greg and Lars: What?

Sadie: Are you seeing this too?!

(The house starts to crumble and debris falls.)

Pearl: *ducks* Wha!

Steven: Wha—

(Pearl and Steven quickly run out of the house and see Sugilite walking towards them from the ocean.)

Greg: What the hey is that?!

(Lars falls off from the "monkey bars".)

Lars: Oohoomph!

(Everyone runs away from Sugilite.)

Sugilite: *roars* I'M... BORED!!!

Steven: It's Sugilite!

Pearl: Y-you're back!

Sugilite: YOU LEFT ME BEHIND! *points at Pearl*

Pearl: We just thought you didn't need any help. Now why don't you separate, and we can all sit down and relax? *gestures over to the Beach House*

Sugilite: No! *kicks Pearl*

Steven: Pearl!

Pearl: Listen to me! You've been fused for too long! You're losing yourselves!

Sugilite: I AM MYSELF! AND I'M SICK OF BEING SPLIT UP! So you better get used to me, baby. AND GET THIS JUNK OFF MY BEACH! (Sugilite steps on the gym thus destroying it.)

Steven: *struggles over to Pearl* Why is she wrecking Dad's gym? Why is she attacking you?!

Pearl: *lifts Steven up and tosses him away* Steven, get out of here!

Steven: *stuck limp on the ground* I... can't... move... *moans in pain*

(Pearl summons her spear.)

Sugilite: WHAT? YOU WANNA FIGHT?!

Pearl: You'll thank me... LATER! *jumps toward Sugilite*

(Sugilite hits Pearl away.)

Greg: Come on, kid! *helps Steven to get up*

Steven: Dad, no! Pearl!

(Pearl knocks off Sugilite's visor.)

Steven and Greg: *gasps*

Sugilite: YOU THINK YOU'RE SOMETHING? YOU! *hits Pearl towards the sky* AIN'T! *smashes Pearl into the ground* NOTHING! *injures Pearl*

(Sugilite attempts to crush Pearl with her flail, but misses. This makes Steven and Greg fly away, landing on the ground hardly.)

Steven: My muscles!

Pearl: Steven! *kneels and cries* I'm sorry... Steven, Garnet, Amethyst... *sniffs* I wasn't strong enough, to protect you. I'm not strong enough to do anything...

Steven (speaking through megaphone): Come on, Pearl! Don't give up! I know you can take her down!

Pearl: I can't...

Steven: *through megaphone* Yes, you can! Come on! You always knew what to do! You gotta show her what you showed me! That you're strong, Pearl! Strong in the REAL WAY! *cries*

(Pearl gets up and looks at the Crystal Temple, and gains back her confidence.)

Sugilite: WHAT? YOU WANT SOME MORE?!

Pearl: ANY TIME! You're no match for me! Not even CLOSE!

(Sugilite punches the ground, and chases after Pearl up to the light house.)

Steven: GOO!

Sugilite: Get back here! (Pearl leaps off the cliff.) Ha! Nice try.

(Sugilite starts swinging her flail only to fall after Pearl throws her spear at her footing. Sugilite then crashes to the ground.)

Sugilite: Is that all you GOT? You think that's enough to beat—

(Sugilite's flail lands on her head, separating her into Garnet and Amethyst.)

Pearl: Amethyst! Garnet! Are you okay!?

Garnet: Yeah... Sugilite just overworked our bodies. It's... a little painful.

Amethyst: I've got a monster headache.

(Pearl hugs them, and the sound of bones being cracked is heard.)

Amethyst & Garnet: *both moan in pain*

Pearl: Whoops.

Steven: Pearl, you did it!

Pearl: Thanks. You make a good coach.

Garnet: Pearl, we should've listened... You were right.

Pearl: Yeah. I was right.

Steven: Go, Pearl!

Pearl: Come on! I feel GREAT! Who's up for a MISSION? Or... *continues in the background*

Amethyst: How long is she going to keep this up?

Garnet: We deserve it. Take it like a Gem.

Lars: Uh... What the heck just happened?!

Steven: DROP AND GIVE ME 20!

[END]