The Fishy Doubloon Caper

Theme music plays.

''The elevator dings. Chase and Julia step into the parking garage.''

Chase: No witness to question. No thieving scoundrel in custody, and not one single red thread to pull. I pursued Carmen Sandiego all the way to Paris and back with nothing to show for my efforts. ...Eh, almost nothing.

Julia: I recommend re-examining the penthouse Ms. Sandiego purportedly attempted to rob here in Poitiers.

Chase: Did rob, Ms. Argent! I watched our super thief spirit into the night with a stolen object stuffed in her black sack.

He dumps a bunch of mints into his mouth and starts to chew them.

Julia: That many mints can't be good for an empty stomach.

Chase: Good night, Ms. Argent.

Julia: Before I go, you may want to check your fuel--

Chase: Now.

''She squares her shoulders and walks away. He tries to start the car, but indeed, there is no fuel. He gets out of the car.''

Chase: Ugh. It seems you were right. I'm all out of--

''When he looks to his side, the person beside him is not Julia but rather one of the mysterious agents that have been following Carmen. She holds up a gun-like device, and a puff of smoke blasts into his face.''

Chase: Gas?

''He passes out, the man coming up from behind to catch him. Meanwhile, Julia sighs, stops walking, and turns back to check on him... but finds no one.''

Julia: Inspector? Where in the world did you go?

''Seagulls cry. We dive into the ocean. Carmen is swimming in a scuba suit.''

Player: Hola, Red. How's sunny Ecuador?

Carmen: Oh... wet.

Player: I'm sure you'll get to see more of South America after your swim. Maybe even paddle further down to Buenos Aires, Argentina.

Carmen: Not sure I'm ready to visit my birthplace. Not without any real clues to my past. What can you tell me about the shipwreck we're looking for?

Player: The satellite images I intercepted show you're warm. Just keep an eye out for the equator. It's a giant red line.

Carmen: Very funny, Player. The equator's a giant imaginary red line that divides our world into northern and southern hemispheres.

Player: Well, Ecuador sits right on the equator, and it looks like the South American country is known for two big exports: bananas and tuna.

Carmen: Huh. I wonder how a banana-fish sandwich would taste. Bet you didn't know the catch of the day is always transported up the Andes Mountains to Quito, the second-highest capital city in the world.

Player: My nose is bleeding just thinking about it. But back down at sea level, the 19th century trading vessel you're looking for might have been transporting Spanish doubloons when it sunk. A big enough haul of these gold coins could be worth millions today. Which means there's a decent chance the wreck is on V.I.L.E.'s radar.

Carmen: With luck, I'll secure any valuable artifacts before V.I.L.E. can scavenge them. Are all hands on deck?

Player: Surface crew is on high alert.

''On a boat, Ivy looks out with binoculars. Zack gags.''

Zack: Fish... Oh, why'd it have to be fish?

''One jumps into the air past him. He throws up over the side of the ship.''

Ivy: Motor off... no one on board...

Zack: Creepy enough for you, Ivy?

Ivy: Creepy enough to want a closer look.

Carmen sees the ship.

Carmen: Player, I found it.

She slips inside.

Carmen: Ha! I'm swimming through the past.

Player: Any sign of treasure?

Carmen: Tons. But not the kind that would interest V.I.L.E. ...Scratch that.

She breaks open a treasure chest, tossing aside things not monetarily valuable to uncover a doubloon.

Carmen: Player, see what you can learn.

''She presses a device and a camera shutter sounds, taking pictures of the doubloon. Rumbling can be heard in the background.''

Player: Whoa. What am I hearing?

El Topo bursts through the floor of the ship.

Carmen: You.

Topo: You?

He sees the doubloon in her hand and charges at her, taking the doubloon and blasting away.

Player: Who was that?

Carmen: El Topo.

She activates a jetpack on her scuba suit and tries to pursue.

Carmen: And if the human mole is down below... his pal, the human goat, is sure to be above.

''Zack and Ivy get closer to the ship. Eventually, Ivy spots Le Chevre on an edge... just in time for him to jump off onto their boat.''

Ivy: Whoa!

''Carmen is in pursuit. She makes him drop the doubloon, and they both race to get it... only for it to be eaten by a fish.''

Carmen: Wow. That really just happened.

They chase the fish.

Chevre: Who are you? What are you doing out here?

Zack: We're, uh... fishermen.

Ivy: Fisherwoman, hello!

Chevre: You do not sound or look like you're from around here.

Zack: Well, uh, Boston Harbor was getting really crowded, you see-- Oops.

Ivy has elbowed him, but Le Chevre just shrugs.

Carmen almost manages to catch the fish when it gets grabbed into a fishing net.

Carmen: Come on, seriously?

''El Topo pushes her aside and tries to swim after it, when his mask fills with water. Carmen holds up a part from his scuba suit that she has stolen. With muffled shouting, he rushes to the surface, leaving her free to shoot a tracker onto the ship the net came from and swim after it.''

Player: Wrap it up, surface crew. Carmen needs assist.

Chevre: That would not be Carmen Sandiego, would it?

Zack: Carmen Sanfrancisco.

Ivy, at the same time: Carmen Sanjose.

Zack: Sanjose? Sanfrancisco!

Ivy, at the same time: Sanfrancisco! Sanjose!

Zack: Ivy!

Ivy: What?

Topo (distantly): Help!

Chevre: Huh?

Topo: Help!

''He's thrashing, trying to keep his head above water. Chevre dives off the side of Zack and Ivy's boat with a life preserver.''

Zack: Let's motor!

Player: I have a bead on your tracker.

Carmen: Keep a close watch, Player. We need to can a tuna.

On the docks.

Carmen: Gracias. ...He says his catch is already on its way to Quito for auction and our coin-swallowing fish with it.

Ivy: For a fish out of water, old yellow-fin sure gets around.

Player: Red, I've looked up the image of the coin. It's a doubloon alright, but it isn't Spanish. It's called the Ecuador eight escudos.

Carmen: So it's an Ecuadorian doubloon?

Player: It looks here like most coin hobbyists know it as the "Moby Dick doubloon."

Carmen: "Moby Dick," like the book? Why would a coin be named after the famous whale?

Player: Because it's the coin the Captain Ahab character nails to the mast of his ship as a reward to anyone who spots the white whale that keeps evading his capture.

Carmen: [sigh] This doubloon is starting to feel like a white whale of my own.

Marquez: I'm sorry, were you speaking of the Ecuador 8 escudos?

Carmen: You've... heard of it.

Marquez: Dr. Pilar Marquez. I am an archaeologist leading an excavation team to the shipwreck.

Carmen: Well, if you happen to be looking for one, you won't find it down there. Not anymore.

Marquez: What? How do you know? You're not... scavengers, are you?

Carmen: Coin hobbyists. Amateur.

Marquez: Then you may not realize that the escudos was the first doubloon minted here in Ecuador, in the 1830s, shortly after we became our own nation. Only a mere handful were ever made.

Zack: Whoa! Must be worth millions!

Marquez: Heh. Despite its rarity, the escudos does not have high monetary value, though it is of tremendous cultural value. As a symbol of Ecuador's independence, it remains one of the strongest links we have to our past.

Ivy: Oh well.

Zack: Aw, the fish can keep it.

Carmen: We'll find it for you.

Zack and Ivy: We will?

Carmen: V.I.L.E. has no idea how much that coin is or isn't worth, which means we need to secure it before they figure out where it's headed.

''A tracker on the side of a boat beeps. Electronic handcuffs beep. We see Chase regaining consciousness. The two agents stand by the door, watching.''

Chase: What is this? You think these can hold me, an agent of Interpol? Haha!

''The woman takes out a pen. Before he can see what it is she's taking out, he flinches away.''

Chase: No, no. No... autographs, please.

''She drops the pen. A hologram appears.''

Chief: Inspector Chase Devineaux, thank you for joining us. ...Holographic projection, the most secure method of communication. Plus the calls don't drop.

Chase: Who... who are you? Why am I here?

Chief: You can call me Chief.

The man clicks a remote and the handcuffs drop.

Chief: And you are here because I understand you have recently come into close contact with a certain elusive Carmen Sandiego.

Chase: And I would very much like to get back to finding her, if you do not mind.

Chief: Well, then you and I may be able to help each other.

Chase: You also seek the Crimson Shadow.

Chief: We're seeking an army of shadows, whom we have reason to believe call themselves V.I.L.E.

Chevre: If Carmen Sandiego is after this doubloon, it must be worth a fortune.

Maelstrom, via tablet: How very delightful to hear, Le Chevre, because Papa needs a new pair of cuff links.

Chevre: Of course, Professor Maelstrom. A vault filled with cuff links of every shape and color.

Topo: And gold rings for every finger. A fancy limousine or a spectacular yacht. No, wait. Your very own private gold course. Uh, I can chase away the gophers for you.

Chevre: The point being, this golden trinket will enable you to buy anything your dark heart desires.

Maelstrom: Buy? I don't think you understand. I intend to melt that doubloon into a pair of solid gold cuff links.

Chevre: Melt? But it is worth a--

Maelstrom: I will be the first on the island. Countess Cleo will be so envious.

Zack drives a bus up the mountains with Carmen and Ivy.

Carmen: Pedal to the metal. If that yellowfin makes it to the auction floor, we could lose it for good.

Player: Word of caution, Red. The air's pretty thin above 9500 feet. If you don't take the time to acclimate, any one of you can get altitude sickness.

Chief: We believe that V.I.L.E. has masterminded most of the major crimes of the last few decades. Everything from the manipulation of financial markets to the contamination of cheese.

Chase: And you have not been able to stop them why?

Chief: Try stopping something that you can't actually prove exists. In nearly 20 years, only 6 suspected V.I.LE. operatives have ever been apprehended by any law enforcement agency. Each vanished before they could be questioned... without a trace.

Chase: No leads, no threats, nothing.

Chief: Exactly.

She points out her finger and accidentally casts the hologram through his forehead.

Chief: Okay, stay still, because if I don't pull out slowly, you could wind up speaking backwards or tasting color. ...I'm joking!

He stands, clearing his throat.

Chase: And what does this V.I.L.E. have to do with Carmen Sandiego? Ha! She is the ringleader!

Chief: A thief who publicly flaunts her crimes, the leader of a phantom criminal empire?

Chase: Eh... good point.

Chief: Despite the decade of amassing data via our highly advanced CrimeNet technology, V.I.L.E. has remained little more than rumor. No faces, no names. Yet an international thief springs from nowhere and, based on her activities, seems to know more about them than we do. We need to learn what she knows, and that means providing you with the tools to find Carmen Sandiego.

In an outdoor marketplace, Zack, Ivy, and Carmen arrive.

Ivy: Ah! Smell that fresh mountain air.

Zack: Oh, smells like... oh, P.U.! Fish!

Carmen: That's a good sign, Zack, since we happen to be looking for a fish mar-- ah...

She gets lightheaded and unstable on her feet.

Zack: Carm?

''With a groan, she collapses. She can faintly hear and see Zack and Ivy run to her.''

Ivy: Carmen!

An answering machine beeps.

Chase: Chase Devineaux. Leave a brief message. If this is about the love seat, it is already sold.

Julia: Inspector, it's me, Julia. I'm sorry to call again, but I would really like to know if you took the train home. Or, if like our witness, you vanished into thin air.

''Carmen wakes, still feverish and weak. Someone presses a cloth to her forehead.''

Carmen: You.

''She sees Coach Brunt. Brunt speaks, but not in her usual voice.''

Brunt: Yes, it is me. You are fortunate that I found you when I did.

Carmen: As a baby. By the side of the road in Argentina. Oh, I always knew it was you.

We see that it is actually Marquez, not Coach Brunt, caring for her.

Marquez: Please, the air is very thin up here. You need oxygen.

Chase: Okay, let us pretend that I believe your conspiracy stories. Why would I bother helping you find Carmen Sandiego? I am already with Interpol.

Chief: You don't have a choice, Inspector. Arrangements have been made with your former superiors. You're not a gumshoe anymore.

''He is handed an A.C.M.E. ID card. ''

Chief: Welcome to A.C.M.E.

When Carmen comes to again, she sits abruptly.

Carmen: Zack? Ivy?

Marquez: I encouraged your colleagues to explore the fish market since they knew little about treating altitude sickness. ...Yes, I followed you. Did you think I would trust a possible scavenger with my coin?

Carmen: Doctor, if I'm to have any hope of retrieving your doubloon, I really need to be...

''Her head spins and she collapses to the bed, dropping her bag. Tools fall out and spill across the floor. Marquez picks one up.''

Marquez: Are these the tools of an amateur coin hobbyist?

Carmen: You helped me. Please, allow me to help you.

''Zack and Ivy are inspecting fish. Ivy is using an x-ray device.''

Zack: Aw, find that coin already, Sis! I can't breathe in here.

Ivy: If you don't put a sock in it, Zack Attack, I'm gonna put a fish in it for you. The eyes, the head, the whole enchilada.

The phone beeps.

Ivy: Wicked awesome! Lucky number 52.

Carmen walks in.

Ivy: Well look what just waltzed in. Red snapper.

Zack: Hey, don't be embarrassed, Carm. The smell of fish gets me woozy too.

Carmen: Tell me you found it.

Ivy: Yup. We've been scanning the tuna carts on deck for the auction floor first to make sure it didn't get past us. It's in that one over there.

Carmen: The one they just wheeled through those doors?

Zack and Ivy gasp.

Auctioneer: 300 once. 300 twice. Lot 51, sold to paddle number 7.

''Carmen peeks in. Le Chevre is up in the rafters.''

Carmen: Le Chevre.

Ivy: Again? That guy really gets my goat.

Carmen: He'd ID me in an instant, with or without the coat. You two need to reel it in.

Zack: How?

Carmen: Bid to win.

Auctioneer: Lot number 52: yellowfin tuna, 97 pounds.

Ivy: That's our guppy.

Auctioneer: Starting at 100 dollars. Do I hear 100 dollars? 100 dollars. Do I hear 150?

Zack: 150,000 dollars!

Carmen face-palms.

Auctioneer: Uh, ahem... Sold!

Zack: What? She said "bid to win." I just won.

Ivy: Not how it works, Bro.

Chevre: That is our tuna. Now, now, now!

''A light shines through the floor and cuts a hole below the tuna cart. It drops through.''

Ivy: We're, uh, not gonna pay for that.

El ''Topo tries to go up through a floor tile, but hits his head on a tuna cart, getting Carmen's attention. He tries another tile and starts to run, but Carmen is pursuing. She gets the fish away from him, only for Le Chevre to snatch it in a net.''

Chevre: Ha-ha!

Carmen: That doubloon isn't worth what you think it is. Stealing it would deprive Ecuador of a cultural treasure.

Chevre: Tell it to Professor Maelstrom.

''She grabs him down with her grappling hook. He screams, dropping the fish. El Topo grabs it, but is stopped by Zack and Ivy blocking his way.''

Ivy: Time to whack a mole, Bro.

Topo: We shall see who will be whacked.

''He swings the tuna at them, but accidentally hits Le Chevre instead. While they are distracted, the coin flies out of the fish's mouth right into Carmen's hand.''

Zack: Whoa.

Ivy: Catch of the day.

Chevre: Uh... I do not feel so well.

Topo: Uh, it is the altitude, Mi Amigo. But I have the coin in hand. Vamonos.

''In the parking garage, Julia sees Devineaux's mints on the ground. A trail leads to a door.''

Chief: A.C.M.E.: Agency to Classify and Monitor Evildoers. We gather data. We monitor criminals, covertly. No one knows we exist. Not law enforcement, not V.I.L.E., not our own families. We are the only entity more invisible than V.I.L.E. itself, and it's imperative that we keep it that way.

''The door opens. Julia pokes her head in.''

Julia: ...Inspector?

Chase: I... have, uh, never seen her before in my life.

Chief: Your partner's pretty sharp.

Marquez has the coin in hand.

Marquez: Thank you, Carmen Sandiego. Someday, the world will know your name.

Carmen: Just happy to do my part for Ecuador.

Marquez: Interesting to hear, coming from an Argentinean. ...During your fever, you mistook me for... someone close to you.

Carmen: A link to my past. We went our separate ways. But maybe a visit home would do me some good.

Player: I have breaking news, Red. That series of art thefts we've been tracking? It's way bigger than we thought. And I have reason to believe the next one on V.I.L.E.'s hit list is at the Rijksmuseum in Amsterdam.

Carmen: Buenos Aires will have to wait.

She goes to the boat, where Zack and Ivy are waiting.

Ending credits music plays.