The Best Burger in the World

(The episode begins at the house and Mordecai, Rigby, Muscle Man, Hi Five Ghost, Pops and Skips are all sitting on the steps)

Mordecai: Hey, You guys going to the grill em up truck for lunch?

Muscle Man: Oh, you know it, baby!

Pops: What's the Grill 'em Up truck?

Mordecai: It's a food truck. They make the best burger in the world.

Skips: That's a bold claim.

Rigby: No it's not. We saw it on TV.

(cuts to some time earlier, when M&R are watching the commercial)

Announcer: Next up on Food Truck Armageddon, the Grill 'em Up food truck is being credited with creating the world's best burger! (on the TV, a graphic of earth zooms up before it is crushed by a giant burger. A caption appears on screen:) The Ulti-Meatum! (cuts to guy named Ajay Maldonaldo making the burger) Head Chef Ajay Maldonaldo's been making headlines with his no-hold-bars style of burger!

Ajay: (as the burger is being made) The Ulti-Meatum is a cheeseburger stuffed inside a cheeseburger with two deep-fried cheeseburgers as buns, and then we add our special ketchup that we get from the Himalayas.

Announcer: The Ulti-Meatum is so amazing, it's only being offered once every 100 years! (the caption "ULTI-MEATY" appears as two cows approach two giant Ulti-Meatums and moo. Cut back to kitchen)

Ajay: Anyone who doesn't eat one... (crosses arms across chest then holds them up making fists) ...is a chump!

(cuts back to the guys)

Skips: Well, that sounds pretty awesome.

Rigby: Yeah, it's awesome! That's what we're saying!

Muscle Man: I heard, that if you ask for it Idaho style, they put a whole bag of chips in it! (laughs)

Pops: Ooh, I want my Ulti-Meatum Idaho style! (everyone agrees as Benson drives up in the cart )

Benson: Alright, everybody, listen up! We got a lot of work to do today, so let's get started. (reads clipboard) Skips and Pops, I want you guys to section off the grass we just planted. Muscle Man and High-Fives, go with them and bring the woodchipper with you.

Muscle Man: You got it.

Benson: Mordecai and Rigby, I don't really have that much for you to do.

Mordecai and Rigby: (high five) Hmhmph! Hmhmph! Hmhmph!

Benson: Oh, except for every job you didn't finish last week!

Mordecai: Aw, what? But we finished everything!

Benson: You guys didn't finish one job last week. Not one!

Rigby: Ugh! Not this again, Benson!

Benson: You see that? That attitude right there. That'll get you nowhere in life, pal. (Rigby spits) Oh, and you know that food truck that's gonna be here?

Mordecai: Yeah. What about it?

Benson: You guys aren't going until you finish all your jobs!

Mordecai: What?! We don't even have that much to do!

Benson: Well, then I guess it won't take you that long to finish. (Benson reads the clipboard as the truck drives up in the background) All you have to do is mow the lawn in the frisbee field... (horn blares) ...clean the tool shed... (M&R notice the food truck coming up) ...you still need to finish picking up the trash in the north end of the park... (Ajay and another chef step out of the food truck) ...scrub both of the men's restrooms... (Ajay flips the sign to show the stand) ...and make sure there's soap in the dispensers. (Ajay and the other chef high-five) You still haven't cleaned out Skips' garage, either.

Mordecai: Benson, please! You can't do this to us!

Rigby: Yeah, Benson, this is messed up!

Benson: Well, too bad. If every last one of your jobs isn't finished, then neither one of you is going... (zoom into his head) ...near that burger truck!

''(an Ulti-Meatum wipes into a montage. First, M&R are mowing the lawn, when Mordecai notices the truck off in the distance. They drop the mowers and try to run over to the truck, but Benson drives up right then and stops them while shaking his head, then signals them to get in the cart. Next, M&R are scrubbing the bathroom floor. Rigby stops for a moment to open the door, and, once again, sees the truck. Rigby signals Mordecai to come with him, but, just as they exit, they are shoved back in by Benson. Then, M&R rake the leaves. Mordecai, once again, notices the truck, and tries to sneak his way to the truck with Rigby before Benson drives through the leaf pile and comes back with M&R. Next, M&R are cleaning the tool shed. Mordecai stops for a moment and wipes the dust off the window and sees the truck. Mordecai then signals Rigby so they can sneak out the window, but the window is blocked off by a red Benson, who then screams at them. Finally, M&R pick up the trash. Mordecai sweats as the montage ends)''

Mordecai: Dude, this is ridiculous. The truck's probably gonna leave soon. (looks over to see Muscle Man, Hi Five Ghost, Pops and Skips eating their Ulti-Meatums. We get close-up views of them eating the burgers) You guys gotta help us. Could one of you guys buy us burgers before the truck leaves?

Skips: Sorry guys, they only serve one burger per customer. (M&R moan) I gotta say, I feel bad for you guys. You won't be around for the next centennial to enjoy this! (eats into his burger) Mmm... mm-hm-hmm. (M&R watch in horror)

Muscle Man: I already got mine. I could die right now with no regrets. But you guys are gonna have to take this to your graves, just wishing you got to taste this Himalayan ketchup. (eats his burger)

Pops: Oh my, I can taste the Himalayas! (laughs as M&R moan. Benson drives up)

Benson: Did I tell you two you could stop working?! 'Get in the cart! '

(cut to Skips' garage. Benson kicks M&R out of the golf cart and onto the ground)

Benson: You still need to clean Skips' garage. There's a bunch of Pops' weird stuff in there that needs to go into storage. When you're done, you can have burgers, deal?

Rigby: Really? (Mordecai opens the garage door. The garage is piled to the ceiling with clutter)

Benson: Yep, have fun you two. (laughs and drives away)

Mordecai: I don't believe this. (clock transition to sometime later. M&R are almost done with the boxes. Mordecai pants hard, and Rigby throws a box into the pile) Dude, what are you doing?! Do you want an Ulti-Meatum or not? (grabs sheet) Come on, help me move this! (M&R remove the curtain to see a machine called a "Hologram 9000". Dramatic music plays as it is shown)

Mordecai and Rigby: Whoa!

Mordecai: What is this thing?

Rigby: It's says, "Hologram 9000".

Mordecai: Cool.

Rigby: Dude, holograms! What if we use it to make holograms of ourselves and put them in here so that Benson thinks we're working?

Mordecai: What? Why would we do that? We're almost done! Plus, it says it can kill you. (sure enough, there is a sticker on the machine that shows so. Off in the distance, Ajay makes an announcement over the megaphone)

Ajay: Last call for burgers. I repeat, last call for burgers.

Mordecai: Dude, you're going first. (Rigby pushes the red button on the machine, and the door slides open. He enters as the door closes. Mordecai sets the switch to "extremely realistic", then, red lasers scan Rigby.

Rigby: Eeeeyaaghhyrrerrohdough! (Rigby screams in pain before the lasers move off) 

Mordecai: Come on, dude, you gotta stay still! It's not gonna work if you move!

Rigby: But it hurts!

Mordecai: Yeah, well, you know what else is gonna hurt? Not getting that burger! (Rigby stands up) Come on, best burger in the world!

Rigby: Best burger in the world! Best burger in the world! Anyone who doesn't eat one... (crosses arms across chest then hold them up like Ajay) ...is a chump! (the lasers scan him)' ''NYAAAAAH! '(Rigby's graphic on the machine turns into a wireframe. Seconds later, Rigby's hologram comes out)''

Mordecai: Dude, it looks exactly like you. (seconds later, Mordecai is in the machine.)

Mordecai: RRRNNGHH!!! (Mordecai grunts as the hologram of him is created. Mordecai kicks a box as he and Rigby place it next to the Rigby hologram, now holding a box, and place a box under the Mordecai hologram) Nice! Let's go hide over there and see if it works on Benson. (M&R run into a bush as Benson drives up) Here he comes. (Benson brakes)

Benson: Boy, somebody must not want burgers for lunch. (drives off)

Rigby: Dude, he bought it!

Mordecai: Yeah, but we gotta hurry. Those things aren't gonna hold them off forever. (M&R runs to the Grill 'em Up truck)

Mordecai and Rigby: Two Ulti-Meatums!

Ajay: Is that it?

Mordecai and Rigby: Yes!

Ajay: Can I get your names?

Rigby: Mordecai and Rigby!

(back at Skips' house, Benson drives up again and looks at the Holograms)

Benson: Why are you guys just standing around? Get back to work! (drives off. Cut to the truck. Ajay places a patty onto the grill and fries one side of it as M&R watch. Back at Skips' house, Benson drives up for a third time) You didn't answer my question! Why are you just standing around?! (steps out. At the truck, the small cheeseburger is already placed on the giant patty. It is flipped over as M&R drool in hunger. At Skips' house, Benson walks up to the holograms) What did I tell you about answering me when I speak to you?! (pause) Why are you just looking at me like that? (looks at Rigby hologram) Rigby, you put that box down now! (runs up to grab the box off the hologram, but knocks it over onto the ground) What the? (taps Mordecai hologram, which falls over. Benson realizes what's going on, panting and turns red) Mordecai and Rigby think they can just skip out on work to go eat burgers? Well, they've got another thing coming! (drives off. Right then, the holograms come to life and look at each other. The two burgers are then dipped in grease, and Ajay adds the Himalayan ketchup, then Mordecai and Rigby turn around in horror as they see Benson driving up in the cart) (slow-mo) GGGRRRAAAAAHHHHHHH!

Mordecai:  (slow-mo) Oh, no!  (turns to Ajay) '  Hurry'  !'  (Ajay wraps the two Ulti-meatums in white bags then rings a bell)

Ajay: You guys are lucky. You just got the last two Ulti-Meatums for the next 100 years. (Mordecai and Rigby grab the burgers, but then the holograms slap them away and grab them)

Rigby: Aw, what?

Mordecai: Give us back our burgers!

Hologram-Mordecai: No way, these are the best burgers in the world!

Hologram-Rigby: Yeah, get lost so we can eat 'em...(crosses arms across chest then holds them up like Ajay)...you chumps! (begins to take a bite)

Rigby: NOOOOOOOO!!!

Benson: AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! (They begin to fight Hologram-Mordecai and Hologram-Rigby.) Nobody's going to eat anything until you finish cleaning the-

(They fight but Hologram-Mordecai and Hologram-Rigby just spins through them)

Ajay and the chef: Fight!, Fight!, Fight!, Fight!, Fight! (They continue through out the fight.)

Hologram-Rigby: I'm gonna enjoy this.

Rigby: (Slow motion voice) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

(Slowly looks at a nearby rock, and The Flower Duet by Lakme start)

(Mordecai and Rigby start throwing rocks at Hologram-Rigby and Hologram Mordecai)

(Rigby picks up the thing keeping the truck in place, causing the truck to roll away, and throws it at Hologram Rigby, destroying him in the process)

Hologram Rigby: (slow motion voice) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!! (gets destroyed)

Hologram Moredcai: (slow motion voice) NOOOOO!! WE JUST WANTED A BURGER! (Mordecai does the same as Rigby) AHHHHHHHH!

(Mordecai and Rigby cross their arms and high-five each other.)

Mordecai and Rigby: Yeah!

Rigby: (excited) Dude, I'm so hungry.

Mordecai: Me too. I can't wait to...

(Unfortunately, Benson ate the two burgers)

Benson: You know, you guys were right all along. These burgers are outstanding. (Eats the rest of the last burger) Oh wait, you guys didn't get to have one. That's too bad, apparently they only make these once every one hundred years. Which is about how long it will take you to finish cleaning out Skips' garage.

(Drives away)

Mordecai: Dude, he's gone, let's see if we can get them to make two more of those burgers.

(They turn around and see that the truck is gone)

Rigby: Uh, where'd the truck go?

(The truck is seen rolling towards the crash pit)

Ajay and the chef: Fight, fight, fight, fight, fight, fight....

(They roll into the crash pit and the truck explodes and the episode ends)