The Benefactor Factor


 * Raj: Here's what I wonder about zombies. What happens if they can't get any human flesh to eat? They can't starve to death, they're already dead.
 * Howard: You take this one. I spent an hour last night on do how vampires shave when they can't see themselves in the mirror.
 * Sheldon: Well-groomed vampires meet in pairs and shave each other: Case closed!


 * Sheldon: Tell him Dr. Cooper feels that the best use of his time is to employ his rare and precious mental faculties to tear the mask off nature and stare at the face of God.


 * Amy: And consider this, without you to make the case for the physics department, the task will fall to people like Leonard and Rajesh.
 * Sheldon: Are you trying to scare me? ‘Cause you’re succeeding.
 * Amy: Well, then prepare to be terrified. If your friends are unconvincing, this year’s donations might go to, say, the geology department.
 * Sheldon: Oh, dear, not, not the dirt people!
 * Amy: Or worse, it could go to the liberal arts.


 * (Leonard enters the cafeteria, which erupts in applause)
 * President Siebert: There he is, the man of the hour! (Puts his arm around Leonard's shoulder.) He took one for the team!
 * Leonard: I didn't do it for the money.
 * Siebert: Keep telling yourself that, it makes it easier. Believe me.