The Morning Report

BUPU: (STRAINING)

BUNGA: Did you try pulling?

BUPU: Of course I tried pulling!

ONO: Everyone? We've got an impatient antelope herd back here. Seems they won't go anywhere without Bupu.

BUPU: Of course not. I am their leader.

FULI: Good thing he didn't lead the whole herd into that tree.

KION: Wait. Instead of pulling Bupu out of the tree, why don't we just break off the branch that's stuck?

BUPU: So I'll be walking around with a branch stuck to my horns?

BESHTE: At least you'll be walking around.

FULI: Yeah. So you can lead your herd. Like you're supposed to.

BUNGA: Not to mention, it'll look great. Maybe I'll start wearing a branch.

KION: Why don't you just see if you can break off a piece, Bunga.

BUNGA: You got it, Kion. Zuka Zama!

BUPU: (GRUNTS) (GRUMBLES) Careful!

NYUNI: Quit shaking my branch!

BUNGA: (GASPS) A talking tree?

NYUNI: Can't a bird feather his nest in peace?

BUNGA: Oh. Just a Bird.

BESHTE: Hey, Nyuni! You live here now?

NYUNI: Yes. I like to try staying in different parts of the Savannah. And this was a great place to live. Until someone waving around his giant horns.

BUNGA: Bupu, I think he means you.

BUPU: (GRUMBLES)

KION: Nyuni, would you mind if you had to find a new nest?

NYUNI: Why should I have to move just because this big ox came along and...

BUPU: I am not an ox!

BUNGA: Or maybe he's not talking about you!

NYUNI: Oh, I'm talking about him all right.

ZAZU: What is all this commotion about?

KION: Oh, hey, Zazu.

ZAZU: Kion. Hmm. An antelope stuck in a tree... This will most definitely be included in my Morning Report.

BUPU: To the King? Does he need to find out about this? Does everyone?

ZAZU: It is my sworn duty to keep the King informed of all the goings-on in the Pride Lands. No matter how bizarre they may be.

KION: Wait. I think I know how you can both be happy.

BUPU: I don't know about this.

FULI: At least now you can lead your herd again.

KION: And you get to see even more of the Pride Lands this way.

NYUNI: Yeah! Let's go Bupu!

BUPU: (GROANS) Let's go, antelopes.

NYUNI: Whoa! Easy!

ZAZU: Hmm. Very original solution, Kion.

KION: Thanks, Zazu.

ZAZU: Now, if you'll excuse me, I must see what else is transpiring in the Pride Lands. Not that I imagine anything will top this. Bupu, in the future, do try to avoid running into trees.

BUPU: Thank you, Zazu.

FULI: Zazu sure likes getting into everybody's business.

KION: It's his job, Fuli.

FULI: He looks out for all the animals in the Pride Lands.

KION: Even us. Remember that time he was after you to slow down when we were little?

FULI: Huh. Which time?

KION: The time Bunga and I ran into the crocodiles...

BABY BUNGA: Zuka Zama!

ZAZU: There you are! Kion, didn't your father tell you to stay put?

BABY KION: Aw, Zazu! Me and Bunga are on an adventure!

BABY FULI: Coming through! Huwezi!

ZAZU: (EXCLAIMING)

(BOTH LAUGHING)

ZAZU: Now see here, young cheetah. You need to slow down!

FULI: Slow down. Got it. Huwezi!

ZAZU: That's not slowing down. Fuli! Fuli!

BABY KION & BABY BUNGA: (BOTH LAUGHING)

ZAZU: And as for you two... Kion? Bunga! Oh, dear! Where have you gotten to?

BABY KION: Adventure, here we come!

BABY BUNGA: Yeah!

BABY KION: (GASPS) Crocodiles!

BABY BUNGA: Crocodiles? Big deal. They can't stop us. Zuka Zama!

BABY KION: Bunga? Wait for me.

BABY BUNGA: All right, croc-iddy crocs! Outta the way!

PUA: What's this?

MAKUU: Looks like a snack.

BABY KION: Careful crocodiles. You don't want to mess with us.

MAKUU: Who do these little ones think they are?

BABY BUNGA: I'm Bunga! He's Kion! And you crocs are in our way!

CROCODILES: (LAUGHING)

PUA: Little cubs. This is crocodile territory. You should leave. Now!

MAKUU: Unless you mean to challenge me.

BABY BUNGA: Oh, yeah! That's right! You bet your bumps I'm gonna challenge you! What does "challenge" mean?

BABY KION: Hey! If you're messin' with Bunga, you're messin' with me!

MAKUU: Oh, good. Two tasty snacks at the same time...

KION: (GULPS)

MALE CROCODILE: Yummy!

ZAZU: Enough!

BOTH: Zazu?

ZAZU: I expect it's merely an oversight on your part, Pua. But surely you did not intend for Makuu to eat... The son of the King?

PUA: This is the son of the King?

BABY BUNGA: Him. Not me.

ZAZU: I hardly think the King would be pleased if your crocs gobbled him up for no reason.

MAKUU: "No reason?" These two came to our watering hole and challenged us. We have every right to eat them.

PUA: Makuu is right, Zazu. King Simba knows and respects our ways.

BABY KION: Zazu?

ZAZU: Very well, Pua. I, too, respect the crocodile ways. But, as Kion's well-being is my responsibility... I offer myself in his place.

MAKUU: Huh?

BUNGA: Un-Bunga-lievable!

ZAZU: Though I am but a humble adviser to King Simba, I expect I will satisfy even the most discriminating of palates.

PUA: Simba is a good and fair King. I would not want to anger him by eating his son, or his royal adviser. Especially one who displays the bravery of a crocodile. (SIGHS) You three are all free to go.

MAKUU: Fine. I wasn't that hungry anyway.

PUA: Kion. You and your friends should not come here uninvited again.

BABY KION: Uh... Yes, sir!

ZAZU: Come you two. Quickly. Back to Pride Rock before Pua changes his mind.

BUNGA: Huh. I forgot all about that.

ONO: Zazu jumped into Makuu's mouth to save you? That's brave.

FULI: (SCOFFS) He had to rescue you. You're the King's son.

KION: Fuli, he was in Makuu's mouth. Not everyone can be that brave.

BUNGA: I'll say. And I know all about being brave.

BESHTE: Sure sounds like bravery to me.

FULI: Maybe.

JANJA: Keep an eye out for Zazu.

CHEEZI: Who-zu?

JANJA: The bird. Right there. (GRUNTS)

ZAZU: All appears to be in order here. Pathway clear, shrubs not too pointy.

CHEEZI: That's the bird Scar wants us to grab?

JANJA: Yeah.

CHUNGU: But why did he want us to grab him?

JANJA: Who cares? When Scar tells me to do something, I do it. Just like when I tell you to do something, you do it. (SIGHS) Just grab the bird! (GRUNTS)

ZAZU: (SQUAWKS) What is the meaning of this? Hyenas. I should have known. What do you think you're doing in the Pride Lands?

JANJA: Actually, we're leaving the Pride Lands. And you're coming with us.

ZAZU: What? I most certainly am not!

JANJA: Grab him and let's get moving.

ZAZU: Unmouth me, you brute! Do you have any idea who I am?

CHUNGU: Ooh, ooh! I know! I know! You're Zazu.

JANJA: Yeah, and now that we've all been properly introduced, let's go.

ZAZU: You'll pay for this. I am adviser to the King. This is definitely making my Morning Report.

KION: Zazu missed the Morning Report? Zazu? That doesn't sound like him.

SIMBA: It's never happened before.

KION: We just saw him a little while ago. Maybe he's just late?

SIMBA: No. It's not like him to be late. For anything. Especially the Morning Report. If he's not here, then I'm afraid something could be wrong.

KION: Don't worry, Dad. We'll find him and make sure he's okay. And I know just where to start.

BUPU: No. I haven't seen that busybody bird since this morning. Perhaps, he's out embarrassing some other animal who found himself in an unfortunate situation.

KION: How about you, Nyuni? Seen anything from up there?

NYUNI: Nope, but I'll keep an eye out. Hey, Bupu, looks like one of the little ones is wandering off.

BUPU: Again? Good catch, Nyuni. I'll take care of it.

FULI: The two of them are getting along now?

BUPU: Of course we're getting along. I'm very easy to get along with.

KION: Ah, right. Of course. Ono, scan the skies. Fuli, see if you can track him by scent.

ONO: Affirmative.

FULI: On it, Kion. (SNIFFING)

BUNGA: And I'll make sure he knows we're looking for him. Zazu! We're looking for you!

BESHTE: If Zazu doesn't hear that, we'll know he's in trouble.

CHEEZI & CHUNGU: (LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

ZAZU: I fail to see what's so funny?

CHUNGU: (LAUGHING) Really? It's funny 'cause you can't fly while you're trapped in there. (LAUGHS) Get it?

CHEEZI: Maybe he had to be there.

CHUNGU: But he is here.

CHEEZI: Yeah. He ain't going nowhere.

(BOTH LAUGHING)

ZAZU: Yes. So, now that you've trapped me so cleverly, what, pray tell, is the rest of your ingenious plan?

CHEEZI: You ain't gonna believe this, but... we don't know.

CHUNGU: Yeah, we sure don't. We're waiting for Janja to come back and tell us.

ZAZU: (SIGHS) Of course, you are. Ugh. This wrongful imprisonment will not go unanswered.

CHUNGU: Maybe we should just eat him.

CHEEZI: You think?

ZAZU: Oh, you're thinking now? So, what would Janja think if he returned to find that you've eaten me?

CHEEZI: Oh, yeah.

CHUNGU: He's right. We gotta wait for Janja. Thanks, Zazu.

ZAZU: Honestly your plan would utterly fall apart if it were't for me.

JANJA: We got the bird, Scar. So now what?

SCAR: Now, you get Zazu to tell you everything he knows. And you listen.

JANJA: We went to all that trouble just to listen to that annoying, little bird?

SCAR: That annoying, little bird is the King's royal adviser. He knows Simba's strengths, his weaknesses, who his allies are. In short, Zazu is keeper of all the secrets of the Pride Lands.

JANJA: Oh, and if he tells us, then we know all the secrets of the Pride Lands.

SCAR: And armed with that knowledge, taking over the Pride Lands will be a simple matter. Even for you.

JANJA: Yeah, even for me. Hyenas would rule the Pride Lands.

SCAR: Yes. But there's no time to waste. Zazu is very important to the royal family. No doubt Kion and his Lion Guard are already looking for him.

JANJA: Oh, I'll get him to talk, all right. It'll be easy. He hasn't shut that hornbill of his since we found him.

ONO: What have we here? (GASPS) Those look like Zazu's feathers. Everyone! Everyone! Over here.

FULI: (SNIFFS) That's Zazu, all right.

BUNGA: There's more over here.

BESHTE: What do you think happened?

FULI: Nothing good, that's for sure.

BUNGA: I don't know. Zazu's pretty old. Maybe his feathers just fell out.

BESHTE: I don't think so, Bunga.

KION: Definitely not. And I bet it has something to do with these hyena tracks.

FULI: The hyenas must have taken Zazu.

BUNGA: The hyenas? What do they want with that poor, old bird?

KION: I'm not waiting to find out. Follow me.

CHEEZI: So...Why should I let you go?

ZAZU: Because, it's the smart thing to do. And you're the smart one.

CHEEZI: Huh?

ZAZU: Chungu, I'll address this to you since obviously, you are the smart one.

CHUNGU: That's what I always thought. I just didn't think of it till now. When you said it. (GIGGLES) Hear that, Cheezi? The smart bird says I'm the smart one.

CHEEZI: (LAUGHS) Yeah! That makes sense. But isn't Janja the smart one?

ZAZU: Actually, I believe that you both are the smart ones.

CHEEZI: Yeah, right!

CHUNGU: (GIGGLES) We is the smart ones!

ZAZU: Indeed! And the smart thing to do is to let me go and tell Janja I escaped.

CHUNGU: Ooh, that is smart!

CHEEZI: Yeah! If we're smart, we gotta do what the smart bird says!

JANJA: Oh, no, you don't!

ZAZU: Oh, dear.

JANJA: Nice try, bird-brain.

CHEEZI: "Bird brain" (LAUGHING) Is that like a fur-brain?

JANJA: See what I have to deal with?

ZAZU: I'm beginning to.

JANJA: Now. You're gonna tell us everything you know, bird. So start spilling some royal secrets. And fast.

ZAZU: Please. The three of you don't scare me.

JANJA: (CHUCKLES)

(HYENAS SNARLING)

ZAZU: Oh... That is a lot of hyenas. Fine. Here is what I have to say. (SHOUTING) If anyone can hear me, I'm trapped in the Outlands!

CHEEZI: We already know that.

CHUNGU: Yeah. We're right here. You don't have to shout.

JANJA: Ugh! We ain't got time for this!

ZAZU: Oh, I'm sorry, were you in a hurry? I'll make this quick. (SHOUTING) I'm near the Hyeya's volcano!

JANJA: Enough screaming! Unless you'd like me to give you something to scream about. Specially seeing as how you're startin' to get me a little steamed. (LAUGHS)

ZAZU: Hmm? What now? (SCREAMS) No! No!

CHEEZI AND CHUNGU: (LAUGHING MANIACALLY)

ZAZU: (SCREAMING) All right! I'll talk! I'll talk!

JANJA: See boys? Sometimes all it takes is a little motivation. I'm listening.

ZAZU:¶ Don't tell anyone that I told you

¶ But the king once wore leaves for a mane ¶ And yes, there are timesI have seen him

¶ Standing out on Pride Rock in the rain.

JANJA: Tell us more, bird-brain.

ZAZU: ¶ Okay, the king likes his bath to be peaceful surrounded by flowers and trees. The king likes to sleep through the morning

¶ At nighttime, he'll do as he pleased.

JANJA: Is that all you've got?

ZAZU: ¶ Oh, no need for steam, I'll tell you much more. In fact, we might be here all day. Take it from me when it comes to the king I do have a great deal to say

JANJA: Well, say it already.

ZAZU: ¶ When Simba greets a procession he'll greet from his left to his right. And when he's out all day hunting. it means he won't hunt in the night.

CHUNGU: That makes sense.

JANJA: Give us the good stuff, bird.

ZAZU: ¶ No need for steam, I'll tell you much more. In fact, we might be here all day. Take it from me when it comes to the king, I do have a great deal to say.

JANJA: (GROWLS)

ZAZU: (WHIMPERS)¶ There's much morethat I know from now and long ago...

KION: Zazu!

FULI: Sounds like it's coming from the volcano.

BUNGA: Sounds like he's flat.

ZAZU: ¶ In fact, we might be here all day. Take it from me when it comes to the king. I do have a great deal to say.

¶ Take it from me when it comes to the king, I do have a great deal to say  (SCREAMS)

JANJA: Wait a second. You didn't tell us anything important!

ZAZU: I most certainly did. You just weren't listening. (SNIFFS) What is that delectable smell? It's me!

CHEEZI: Steamed birdy sure smells delicious. (LAUGHS)

JANJA: Let him steam! (LAUGHS)

ZAZU: (SCREAMS)

HYENAS: (ALL LAUGHING)

ZAZU: I'll talk! I'll talk!

JANJA: Too late, birdy! Since nothin' good's coming out of your mouth, something tasty's going into ours.

(ALL LAUGHING)

CHUNGU: Yeah.

KION: Janja! Let Zazu go!

JANJA: Huh?

CHEEZI: Think he wants to eat the bird too?

CHUNGU: Maybe.

KION: Till the Pride Lands end...

ALL: Lion Guard defend!

BUNGA: Heya, hyenas. Zuka Zama!

JANJA: (GROANS) So you came to rescue the royal advisor to the king.

KION: No, I came to rescue my friend!

BESHTE: (GRUNTING)

ZAZU: Ouch.

CHEEZI: (WHIMPERING)

ZAZU: A-ha! That's definitely going into my Morning Report.

CHUNGU: (GRUNTS)

ONO: Missed me. Try again.

CHUNGU: Um, okay. (WHIMPERING) Hot! Hot!

ZAZU: Nice going, Ono. Oh, no! They have Fuli backed up to the ledge.

(HYENAS GROWLING)

ZAZU: (YELLS) Fuli! Fuli!

FULI: (EXHALES) Little busy here, Zazu.

ZAZU: Very well. Up to me. (GRUNTS)

FULI: You sure you want to take me on? (GROWLS)

ZAZU: I'm coming, Fuli!

FULI: Zazu?

ZAZU: (YELLING)

FULI: Whoa! Thanks, Zazu!

ZAZU: Just doing what has to be done. (SCREAMS)

KION: Zazu?

ZAZU: Oh, no!

FULI: Zazu!

KION: This better work. (ROARS)

ZAZU: (GRUNTS) (SQUAWKS) Gracious.

KION: Zazu? You okay?

ZAZU: Indeed. Thanks to you!

JANJA: (LOW GROWL)

KION: (GRUNTS)

JANJA: Bird's free. Let's get outta here!

CHEEZI: That bird sure told us a lot, Janja!

CHUNGU: Yeah, he sure did!

JANJA: But he didn't tell us anything useful, fur-brains.

CHEEZI: He didn't? (SIGHS) Good. 'Cause I already forgot it all.

CHUNGU: Ooh, wait! I remember where Simba takes his bath!

JANJA: Oh.

KION: Come on, Zazu. Let's get you back to Pride Rock.

ZAZU: Yes. You took the words right out of my beak. And so, for today's Morning Report...

SIMBA: The Morning Report? Really, Zazu?

ZAZU: Yes. (SIGHS IN RELIEF) I've never given a late Morning Report.

BESHTE: Not your fault, Zazu.

JANJA: It was the hyenas.

BUNGA: Yeah! But you should've seen Zazu in action!

FULI: Yeah. You took out two hyenas to save me. Not everyone can be that brave. I owe you one.

ZAZU: Oh. Thank you, Fuli. Though I wouldn't be here if you all hadn't rescued me. In fact, I owe all of you one.

KION: Not me. We're even. Maybe you forgot that you saved me from the crocs when I was a little cub. But I never did.

ZAZU: Ah, yes. That was a close one, indeed. But enough reminiscing. And on with the Morning Report!

SIMBA: Oh, by all means, before it's morning again.

ZAZU: Well, it all began this morning! After observing Kion's clever solution for Bupu - the sight of an antelope stuck in a tree is quite amusing, sire. I then continued my inspection of the path through the grasslands, where I encountered the hyenas. Of course we know how that turned out, don't we?