What's Your Number?


 * [first lines; after Ally wakes up early, makes herself up and goes back to bed pretending to wake up at the same time as her boyfriend]
 * Rick: How come you always look so great in the morning?
 * Ally Darling: Do I?
 * [Rick rolls over and goes back to sleep]
 * [as Ally serves Rick breakfast]
 * Ally Darling: Hey, so I was thinking that maybe you’d wanna be my date to my sister’s wedding. There’s a vegetarian alternative, I already checked.
 * Rick: Are your parents gonna be there?
 * Ally Darling: At my sister’s wedding? I think so.
 * Rick: I don’t know, it just feels a little serious.
 * Ally Darling: Oh, I’m sorry. It just, um…felt kind of serious last night when you were doing me from behind, but I couldn’t see your face, so.
 * Rick: You know, if you just wanna hook up, just call me.
 * Ally Darling: Oh, thank you, Rick. That’s very generous of you.
 * [Rick turns to leave]
 * Rick: See you around.
 * [he turns back to face her again]
 * Rick: Keep it green.
 * [Ally is talking to her sister on the phone whilst walking to work]
 * Daisy Darling: I could have you it wasn’t gonna work out with Rick two months ago.
 * Ally Darling: Why?
 * Daisy Darling: You love meat, you hate cyclists.
 * Ally Darling: I do love meat.
 * Daisy Darling: And to be honest, I was a little worried about the way he kept wanting to do it doggy style.
 * Ally Darling: Some people like that, you know?
 * Daisy Darling: No, nobody likes it. Even the dogs are just waiting for it to be over.
 * Ally Darling: How many relationships do I have to have before I meet the right guy?
 * Daisy Darling: Uh…evidently a lot.
 * [at work, Ally is called into her boss’ office]
 * Roger: Sweetheart, we have to let you go. I’m sorry, but, uh…we had to make some painful cuts.
 * Ally Darling: Who else is getting fired?
 * Roger: Well, for now, just you.
 * [after getting fired, Ally is riding home on the subway, she reads a magazine article stating the average woman has 10.5 sexual partners in their lifetime]
 * Ally Darling: Ten point five? Holy shit!
 * [the woman sat next to her looks at her as makes this outburst]
 * Ally Darling: I’m sorry. It…it just says here, the average number of lovers women have in their lifetime is ten point five.
 * Plant Lady: Yeah, that seems very high.
 * Ally Darling: High? No, that’s low! Ten point five is low!
 * Plant Lady: Whatever you say.
 * [Ally looks freaked out and starts making a list of all of the guys she has slept with]
 * [Ally arrives at her sister’s pre-wedding party]
 * Ava Darling: Where is Rick?
 * Ally Darling: Rick’s on a business trip, for his business.
 * Ava Darling: Nuts, I was looking forward to finally meeting him. Why aren’t you wearing the dress I bought you?
 * Ally Darling: This is the dress you bought me.
 * Ava Darling: What? It looked very different on the mannequin.
 * Ally Darling: Is Daisy upstairs?
 * Ava Darling: Yeah, she is. She is a wreck.
 * Ally Darling: Okay, I’m gonna go check on her.
 * Ava Darling: Please, do.
 * [Ally starts to walk off]
 * Ava Darling: Oh, your cousin Beau is here.
 * [as she’s walking up the stairs, Ally shouts back]
 * Ally Darling: Step cousin! He’s a step cousin, we’re not even remotely related!
 * [she takes out her notebook and adds Beau to the list of guys she’s slept with]
 * Daisy Darling: Thank God you’re here. Mom has been such a bitch, ever since Eddie’s parents got here. She just cannot believe that her marriage ended before there’s did.
 * Ally Darling: Well, dad should be here soon. So she’ll have someone else to focus her hatred on.
 * Daisy Darling: Um…dad’s not coming. She won’t let me invite him here.
 * Ally Darling: Are you inviting him to the wedding?
 * Daisy Darling: Ah…I don’t know.
 * Ally Darling: Oh.