The Pig And The Rhino

Look at me! You you you turned me into a dang pig! I don't want to be a pig! The ladies don't love pigs! Can't you turn me into something cool? Like a mongoose? Oh, you mutate me into giant, talking rhino? You will pay for me, Shredder! No. I will deal with them myself. Eat this! Ha! Ivan Steranko, Anton Zeck, you will either serve me or fall by my hand. Uh, being a pig does have limited employment options. The bacon's in. Da. We serve you, Shredder. For now. What is you want us to do? You found my daughter once. You will find her again. Fail me, and I will introduce you to new forms of pain. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Heroes in a half shell, turtle power Here we go, it's a lean, green, ninja team On the scene, cool teens doing ninja things So extreme, out the sewer like laser beams Get rocked with the shell-shocked pizza kings Can't stop these radical dudes The secret of the ooze, made the chosen few Emerge from the shadows to make their move The good guys win, and the bad guys lose Leonardo's the leader in blue Does anything it takes to get his ninjas through Donatello is the fellow who has a way with machines Raphael's got the most attitude on the team Michelangelo, he's one of a kind And you know just where to find him when it's party time Master Splinter taught 'em every single skill they need To be one lean, mean, green, incredible team Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Heroes in a half shell, turtle power I'm gonna crush you, Crognard. Let's smash him in the head, brother. Oh, no. Crognard, look out. Evil Grom and Grum, no more will you trouble the village of Magooloorooroo! By the power of Lobnarr! I have the energy! Let's get this meeting started. All right, I got things to do and bad guys to mess up. Karai's still out there. The last thing she said to me was the word "comet. " So, what's that supposed to mean? A giant comet's coming? The earth's doomed? It feels like it could be a location. Maybe where she's hiding out. Donnie's found three locations with the word "comet" in them. - D? - We've got Comet Cleaners on Bleecker Street here. Earth vs. the Comet Creeps is playing at the Argosy Theater here. And then we've got the Coney Comet roller coaster on Coney Island here. So one of these places could be her lair theoretically. Ooh, ooh, ooh! Can I check out the Comet roller coaster? Please? Come on, Leo, hook a turtle up. Donnie and April, you take Comet Cleaners. Raph and Casey, you take the movie theater. Me and Mikey will check out Coney Island. Oh, yeah, boy! Thanks, Leo. I have just enough retro-mutagen brewed for three doses. Each team gets one. It'll be weeks before I finish more. So in other words, don't waste it. Got you. Karai's condition is unique. There's no guarantee this will even work on her. All we can do is try, Donnie. Man, Steranko, you are one ugly, horn-headed, Jurassic-looking fool. I am rhinoceros. Listen, Comrade Zeck, forget Karai. We must destroy turtles instead for what they did to me. I mean, us. You're right, big S. If they hadn't interfered at the docks, none of this would have happened. I say we comb those turtles' wigs back, flip it and comb the wig back again! I say we splits up, track them down and sqwoosh them where they stands. Shoot, my piggy nose is better than a bloodhound's. Whoo-hoo! I just need to catch a whiff. Whoo-hoo! Hmm. Oh, snap! I distinctly smell aroma de turtle. Whoo-hoo! No sign of Karai. The place is completely abandoned. All right, one location down. I'll call Leo. Maybe they had better luck. April? Someone someone is watching us. Hmm, I don't see any Ow! Old what's-his-name, the fly guy Baxter Bughead? He fixed my invisibility tech. Wow to the wow to the wow to the wee Oh! Oh, man. How'd you find me? 'Cause you don't shut up. Who is this guy, Donnie? He was a thief named Zeck. Looks like he got a little mutated. Yeow! Eee-ye-hee! Ugh! Is this glue? You think you can take me? Huh? I will drop you like an ex-girlfriend. Your skills are weak, pig head! Donnie! No worries. My hip lasers were set to stun. We need you guys alive to bait your turtle bros. Hmm, what's this? Ha! I got some sweet news, baby Ivan. Not only did I catch a turtle, I know exactly where the other freaks are going. Check out the Argosy Theater on Houston. Me and my new homies are going to Coney Island. Hey! Who do you think you are? Let us out! Help! I don't know, sarge. I'm scared down to my Skivvies. I wonder if these comet creeps can be communicated with. Reasoned with. Perhaps a universal understanding of peace can be Eh, these ooze specs aren't working right. Maybe I should call Donnie. It's not your specs, dude. We searched every inch of the place. Karai's definitely not here. Let's check one last time. Maybe there's a basement Well, well, well. Comrade Zeck made good on info. Turtle here and strange human friend. Whoa. Another mutant? Dude, he's kind of rad. Rad and strong. The July of Fourth. Fireworks do you nothing. Well, let's see what this does. Goongala! Okay, that didn't work. No, Casey! Raph! Wake up, Raph! Wake up! Dude, Leo, this is so cool. Can we go on the Whirlwind? What about the Wheel of Fun? Ooh, can we play Robot Ringtoss? Please? You promised you wouldn't goof around, Mikey. Seriously. We don't want to scare Karai off. Oh. She's got to know we're here by now, right? Why doesn't she just come out? Maybe she's not in her right mind. Or maybe she's worried she'll lose control and attack us. I feel so bad for her. - Hmm, no sign of her. I hope the guys are having better luck. Whoa! Dude, I think I just saw her! She went into the ghost house. Uh, this place isn't so bad. It's just a painted board. That didn't scare me at all. Have you been working out? Mikey, don't let her escape. Whoa. I got her. Oh! She's right here. Karai! Karai, we want to help you. Don't you remember us? Aah! Get it off, get it off! - She's trying to eat me! - Karai, it's us. It's me, Leo. Try and remember. Focus. Leo. We want to help you, Karai. Can you transform back? Karai! Are you here yet, Steranko? What's the deal, yo? Da, comrade, look behind you. Whoo! Rhino legs very fast. Good workout. Better than the Pilates. You can't do this! We have friends that are gonna kick your butts! So, other turtles are here? Da? Turtles! Come out and play! Gotcha. If you surrender, the humans go free. Pinkie promise. Forget it. We don't trust you dudes. You has no choice. In five second, I pop humans' head like the blueberries. Four, three, two, one! Okay, don't hurt them! Let's talk this over. Um, what do we call you guys now, anyway? You need mutant names. Um, and it just so happens I am awesome at naming stuff. How about Pork Rind and Chili Cheese Fry? - Ah - Nyet, nyet. Not so good names. How about Sprinkles and Hot Sauce? Nyet. The Royal Weenies? Nyet! Then how about, um Bebop and Rocksteady? Is that what you do? Randomly name enemies based on stuff you see around you? Hey, it's not so bad. Kind of like the Rocksteady. Aha! You think you can get past my goggles, son? I saw you a mile away. Hyah! No one can face the Bebop and Rocksteady! I am not going to be called Bebop, got me? That is the dumbest name ever! He's got the retro-mutagen! Retro-mutagen, huh? I'm wondering what it'll do to mutant turtles. Don't do it, Bebop. Stop calling me that name, fool! I hate that name! I hate that name! Time for the next mutation, turtle. Mikey! Nyet! Bebop, wait. Think with the brain for once. Retro-mutagen can turn us human again. Wow, I didn't even think of that! Let's do the dizzle! And stop calling me Bebop, yo! Nyet. Why do you get to be using it? - You did not just - Give it back. - I had it first! - Nyet, nyet, nyet! We need a better distraction. Huh? Aah! Get back here, snakey snake! Leo! Sorry it took so long, April. I'll have you free in no time. Thanks, Leo. Oh, my aching brain. What hit me? It was that huge rhino dude. Right there! Turtles free? What do we do, Leo? You three go after Karai. Me, Raph, and Mikey will take Rocksteady. Hey, rhino man! You want some retro-mutagen? Whoa, wicked. This was my favorite fun house as a kid. Careful. He's close. Invisible. He's Oh, I hate that! I hate it when stuff jumps out at you! I know exactly what you mean. Hey! Ow! Don't worry. I would never hit a lady. - Aah! Ow. - But I'll trip her. Come out, lowly cowards! Come and get us, Rocksteady! Hey, Rocksteady. Looking for some retro-mutagen? All aboard the turtle coaster! Whoo! Here he comes. Doesn't this thing move any faster? Whoa! - Eat it, rhino! - Aah! - Mikey! - Mikey! You will give me retro-mutagen now! Come out, pig! Show yourself! His name's Bebop. My name is not Bebop! Oh, dang. Turtles, give retro-mutagen. Put him down first. I don't trust you. I has your word you give? You has my word. Ugh. Thanks, bro. Retro-mutagen now! You want it? Take it! No! You gave word! But I didn't! Hyah! Oh, no. Aah! Hey, horn head. Booyakasha! Aaaah! There is. Rocksteady! Eat it! Whoo oh! Ha! You picked the wrong night to mess with me, girl. Everyone okay? I think I only sprained a leg or two. Karai, I know you're here. Come out. You don't have to be afraid anymore. We can help you. With this. It doesn't work. Donnie? I told you, Leo. Karai is special. She's not a normal mutant. It was all for nothing? It doesn't matter. You can come home with us, Karai. We'll take care of you, I promise. No. Too dangerous. My mind is going. Then then why did you want us to find you? Wanted to say good-bye to all of you. No! Karai! We'll figure out a way to help you, Karai. I promise. Guys, Bebop and Rocksteady are gone. Ah, let them go. The next time I see them, they won't walk away. Come on, team. Let's go home. What is this? We has Karai, Shredder. Just like you ask. My daughter, do not fear. I will soon cure you of this terrible affliction. And then we will have our revenge.