The Focus Attenuation


 * Sheldon: I know the real reason you never made progress with that idea. You thought of it September 22nd, 2007. Two days later Penny moved in and so much blood rushed to your genitals your brain became a ghost town.


 * Sheldon: Why die? Why did he die? All told. I was told he was old.


 * Howard: You admit that Amy is a distraction?
 * Sheldon: Of very much so. Listen to this. This was from two days ago. “Hi. Hope you’re having a good day.” Who has time for this constant sexting?


 * Howard: My cousin has a cabin out in the woods.
 * Sheldon: I’m not going to a cabin in the woods. Did you see the movie, “Cabin in the Woods”?
 * Leonard: Then we’ll go to a hotel.
 * Sheldon: A hotel? Did you see “The Shining”?
 * Raj: We could go up to Big Bear and get a house on the lake.
 * Sheldon: Did you see “The Lake House”?
 * Raj: Nothing bad happens in “The Lake House”.
 * Sheldon: Yeah well. No. Not to them. To me. Time traveling mailbox. The only time that travelled was an hour and a half of my life down the toilet.
 * Leonard: Fine. Then we’ll just stay here and do it.
 * Sheldon: Why didn’t you suggest a beach house?
 * Leonard: You would go to a beach house?
 * Sheldon: Well, Good lord, no. Have you seen “Jaws”?


 * Raj: Hey.
 * Howard: Hey. Didn’t think you’d make it.
 * Raj: Why not?
 * Howard: Because you have a steady girlfriend now and we assumed I’d thought you’d have to stay home to lower food down to her in the pit.


 * Leonard: Guys. In thirty seconds we went from “Let’s change the world” to ”Let’s watch TV”.


 * Leonard: Ah. Here it is. Whoa. I haven’t looked at these in years. “Robot girlfriend.”
 * Howard: Mm. That would be mine.
 * Leonard: “Robot prostitute”.
 * Howard: Also mine.
 * Sheldon: Wait. I’m confused. Why would you need both a robot girlfriend and a robot prostitute?
 * Howard: There’s just some things you don’t do with your robot girlfriend.


 * Sheldon: I have long suspected that the idea of an African-American president was stolen from the movie “Deep Impact”.


 *  Penny: We’ll, we’re in Vegas. I want to go downstairs, get a bucket of margaritas, dance until I vomit all over a roulette wheel and watch it go everywhere.
 * Amy: Well, what if we don't want to vomit?
 * Penny: Oh, you will. That's why they give you the bucket.


 * Sheldon: Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Is “placed” right?
 * Leonard: What do you mean?
 * Sheldon: Is “placed” the right tense for something that would have happened in the future of a past that was affected by something from the future?
 * Leonard: Had will have placed?
 * Sheldon: That’s my boy.


 * Sheldon: Marty and Doc never have had brought the time machine to 2015. That means 2015 Biff could also have had not brought the almanac to 1955 Biff. Therefore, the timeline in which 1955 Biff gets the almanac is also the time line in which 1955 Biff never gets the almanac. And not just “never gets”. “Never has, never hasn’t and never have has hasn’t”.


 * [The scene at the bar of Vegas where Bernadette and Amy are sitting at a table for two drinking two very huge margaritas, they finishing the first sips with their red straws. Amy finishes hers]
 * Amy: Maybe after this you’ll be in the mood for some Manilow.
 * [Bernadette finishes her sip and speaks jokingly to Amy]
 * Bernadette: I think after this I’ll be dead.
 * [Bernadette takes another sip]
 * Amy: Look at us out while Penny’s in the room studying.
 * Bernadette: I’m proud of her. This is a great opportunity. It is nice to see her taking it seriously.
 * [Bernadette goes back to sipping and Amy speaks]
 * Amy: It is. But enough about Penny. Let’s talk about us. We’re looking good.
 * [Scene of Bernadette with her arms in the air whilst sipping]
 * Bernadette: We are. [Giggles]
 * Amy: Better than good. I mean, look at you. Your body’s banging.
 * [Bernadette has a big grin for two seconds]
 * Bernadette: [so giggly] Amy.
 * Amy: Don’t “Amy” Me. We’re always talking about how hot Penny is. Come on. Scientist to scientist. How big are those Hadron Colliders?
 * [Bernadette gazes and smiles for five seconds, she then plays with her red straw]
 * Bernadette: [still very giggly] You’re embarrassing me.
 * Amy: Oh, don’t be embarrassed. I’ll show you the davit in my spine.
 * Bernadette: [gigantically giggly] Really?
 * Amy: If you put a double A battery in it my leg kicks.
 * [Bernadette just frowns and says nothing]


 * Sheldon: Wait, a question, who decides if someone’s gone off topic?
 * Leonard: I think it’ll be pretty clear. If not, we’ll take a vote. Oh, and also…
 * Sheldon: Ow. We didn’t vote!
 * Leonard: We didn’t have to, that was clearly a tangent. Now come on. Back to work. If we’re leaning toward quantum coupling… Ee-yow. Why?
 * Sheldon: You said quantum coupling. That made me think of the show ”Quantum Leap”. That’s a tangent and it’s your fault.


 * [The scene in the Vegas hotel room with Penny focusing on her laptop studying while there is a knock at the door and Penny turns her head round to see the door]
 * Bernadette: [Drunk and out of sight] Housekeeping.
 * [Penny puts a quiet angry smile]
 * Amy: [Drunk and out of sight] We had a complaint about somebody pooping on a party in there.
 * [Bernadette and Amy both drunkenly open the doors and enter the room]
 * Bernadette: [Excited with drunkenness] It was us the whole time.
 * Amy: [Drunkenly and crossly] Why’d you tell her? It was working.
 * Bernadette: [Drunkenly puzzled] Was it working?
 * Penny: [with loud happiness] Yeah.
 * Bernadette: [Ashamed with drunkenness] Oh, I’m so sorry.
 * Penny: [happy] You guys look like you’re having fun.
 * Amy: [with a little bit of drunken excitement] We’re having the best time.
 * Bernadette: [Half-happy and half-cross with drunkenness] Guess who won a hundred dollars playing craps?
 * Penny: [She turns a bit cross] That’s a dollar.
 * Bernadette: Then guess who wildly over tipped a cocktail waitress.
 * [Bernadette drunkenly drops the coin on to the table and drunkenly starts biting the top of her red straw]
 * Amy: [running up to her with another bit of drunken excitement] Hey, Penny. Hey. Let’s go. We found a place that has Australian male strippers.
 * Bernadette: [She's still excitedly drunk by this] We want to see I they twirl their junk in the other direction.
 * [Bernadette excitedly moves her hips around and twists with her self for 16 seconds with her drunkenness].
 * Penny: [happy but firm] That sounds so great, but I have a little more studying to do.
 * Amy: [Drunk with happiness] Can you believe this nerd?
 * Bernadette: [Drunk with happiness] Come on, do you want to sit here being a loser or do you want to watch me climb into an Australian man’s G-string like a baby kangaroo?
 * [Bernadette drunkenly bites the top of her red straw for a few seconds and Penny makes a reacting face with big eyes and an open mouth for eight seconds]
 * Penny: [Annoyed] All right, guys. Look. I would love to go out, but I have got to get this done, okay. So have fun at the club. And if you get into trouble, find a policeman. And if he is taking off his pants he is not a real policeman.
 * Amy: [drunkenly tells Bernadette plan] Okay, okay. This is obviously really important to her. Let’s just, we’ll help her study so she can get done quicker.
 * Bernadette: [Drunkenly agrees in a low voice] Sure.
 * Amy: Here, here. I’m gonna quiz you. I’m gonna quiz you. [She takes Pennys computers and has a drunken scream of excitement] I got your notes! I got your notes! I got your notes! If you want these they’re going to be at the strip club.
 * [Amy has now drunkenly exited the hotel room shouted with drunken excitement]
 * Bernadette: [with drunken happiness] Aren’t you gonna chase her?
 * Penny: [with firm happiness] To the walk-in closet? Sure.
 * [Bernadette shows her final drunken smile]


 * [The ending scene at the Vegas hotel room in darkness where Bernadette (with her glasses on her forehead) and Amy (with her glasses that about to fall off her nose) are both on the bed looking rather quiet and extremley hungover in their previous evening clothes (as of both being too hungover to shower, wash, brush their teeth and change into their pajamas or nigelies) when a shadow of Penny arrives].
 * Penny: Good morning. You want to go to the pool?
 * [Both Bernadette and Amy are groaning because they have a very huge hangover together]
 * Penny: Come on, you said it yourself, only nerds and losers stay in the room.
 * [Penny opens the curtains and both Bernadette and Amy groan over the very bright sunlight shining through the window and attacking them with their very huge hangovers]
 * Penny: (excitedly) Wow, it’s bright out. Isn’t it bright? I should probably close these curtains. Nah. Bye.
 * [Penny has now left for the pool with complete excitement]
 * Bernadette: (groaning and asking in her quirky hungover voice) Would you please close the drapes?
 * Amy: (agreeing quietly whilst groaning in her hungover voice) Okay.
 * [There is a thudding sound of Amy collapsing of the end of the bed, Bernadette now remains on the bed on her own and rubs a sore eye whilst Amy is now passing out on the floor out of sight].