The Krabby Patty that Ate Bikini Bottom


 * Sandy: Once the testing is complete, the growth serum could be used to do a lot of good things.


 * Mr. Krabs: (gasps)


 * Sandy: Sure would hate to see it fallen into the wrong hands. Someone who might just use it to try and get-


 * Mr. Krabs: Rich! I'll be rich!


 * Sandy: What's that, Mr. Krabs?


 * Mr. Krabs: Uh, could I borrow your telephone? (dialing the telephone and its ringing) Heh, it's ringing.


 * SpongeBob: (suddenly runs into the scene) Mr. Krabs, I came as soon as I got the call!


 * Mr. Krabs: (Puts the phone back in) Uh, did you bring a Krabby Patty like I was planning to ask you to do?


 * SpongeBob: (brings out a krabby patty) Aye aye, captain.


 * Mr. Krabs: Perfect! Ok Sandy, administer the growth serum.


 * Sandy: I don't know, Mr. Krabs. I can't predict what's going to happen.


 * Mr. Krabs: Well, you did say it needs further testing. Test it on the krabby patty.


 * Sandy: Well I suppose so. But only a single drop.


 * Mr. Krabs: Fair enough. (Sandy puts a drop of growth serum into the krabby patty) Is it suppose to smell like that?


 * Sandy: If you two will excuse me, I need to pay a quick visit to a little squirrel's room. (hands Mr. Krabs the growth serum before leaving the scene) Would you mind holding these while I'm gone? I'll only be a minute.


 * Mr. Krabs: (looks at the growth serum) Oh no, we don't mind. (dumps the whole thing onto the krabby patty) Heh heh heh, there.


 * SpongeBob: But Sandy said--


 * Mr. Krabs: (closes SpongeBob's mouth) Sh sh sh sh sh sh sh. (He and SpongeBob goes to Sandy's door) Thanks for the tour Sandy, see you later! (leaving Sandy's Treedome and camera zooms in on the growth serum beaker which is now empty)


 * (Scene cuts to SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs walking)


 * Mr. Krabs: Eh, that patty didn't look like it's growing to me. Pfft, growth serum. Wasted a perfectly krabby patty would blemy.


 * (Krabby Patty suddenly grows on SpongeBob's hands)


 * SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs.


 * Mr. Krabs: Great, let's get into the Krusty Krab.


 * (Krabby Patty grows even bigger. SpongeBob struggles to carry it)


 * SpongeBob: Patty... Becoming... Awkward...


 * Mr. Krabs: Oh, here, here. (Brings out a grocery bag) Put it in this grocery bag.


 * SpongeBob: Grocery bag? Where'd you get a grocery bag?


 * Mr. Krabs: The grocery store.
 * (Scene cuts to the inside of the Krusty Krab. Squidward is at his post. SpongeBob comes by carrying a bigger krabby patty, trying to keep it balanced. Squidward stares at SpongeBob as he goes to the kitchen. The patty is now on the table. Mr. Krabs comes in as the krabby patty grows even bigger. The patty appears to be pulsing.)
 * SpongeBob: So, uh, how big's this thing suppose to get?
 * Mr. Krabs: Heh heh, who cares. It's an endless supply of free patties! And cook them fast, boy! (walks out the door) We got customers!
 * Squidward: (comes in from the post with an order) SpongeBob! Are you going to cook that thing or just stand there staring at it? (throws the order)
 * SpongeBob: Sorry Squidward. Coming right up! (runs to the stove grabbing the order) Order up, Squidward! (carrying a plate of piled up Krabby Patties)
 * Squidward: All right, keep them coming! (grabs the Krabby Patties)
 * SpongeBob: You betcha! (takes a scrap of patties from the big patty and put them on the stove. SpongeBob flips one of them as the big krabby patty grows even bigger behind SpongeBob)
 * SpongeBob: Oh my goodness! I almost forgot to flip that one. (he flips the krabby patty with a spatula) There we go. (brings out another pile of krabby patties and it bumps it behind Squidward's head.)
 * Squidward: Ok, that's great SpongeBob, but you don't have to knock me in the-  BAGEGAH! (gets surprised at the Krabby patty growing behind SpongeBob)
 * SpongeBob: Squidward, why did you make that weird noi- (He looks at the Patty and screams as it comes alive). Ahh! Easy boy. Easy. Never thought I'd say this but, I've gotta get out of this kitchen! (SpongeBob runs to the exit, but sees the grill eaten up) Nooooooo! Huh? (SpongeBob stares down as the krabby patty advances to his shoe. SpongeBob fights it off with his spatuala, but that gets eaten. SpongeBob screams then desperately yanks off his left shoe and sock, while the patty eats that up.) Squidward! That giant krabby patty is on a rampage! We have to escape!
 * Squidward: (Sees SpongeBob's bare foot) Do you always go barefoot at work, or have I just never noticed before?
 * SpongeBob: (pointing to his bare foot) Wouldn't this just count as half-barefoot? Squidward behind you! (SpongeBob points to growing patty, now destroying the Krusty Krab) Abandon ship! (Squidward screams as he and SpongeBob both flee).
 * Fish: [everyone runs out of the Krusty Krab] It's a Krabalanche! [SpongeBob and Squidward try to exit, but Mr. Krabs blocks their way.]
 * Mr. Krabs: Hold it! And just what is it you two think you're doing?
 * Squidward: The restaurant's being invaded by a 300 foot uncooked menu item. We're getting outta here!
 * Mr. Krabs: Whoa ho, this is a dream come true! You can't just leave!
 * Squidward: Oh, do you have a better idea?
 * Mr. Krabs: Stay?... And work?
 * Squidward: Okay, you go right ahead. But I'd rather stay alive than stay at work. That means you- [Squidward turns to see the cash register getting eaten by the Krabby Patty]
 * Mr. Krabs: Cashy! [Mr. Krabs runs over to the register.]
 * SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs, look out!
 * Mr. Krabs: Aaah! [Mr. Krabs is eaten by the Krabby Patty, which then proceeds to eat a table, a barrel chair and a column.]
 * Squidward: [To SpongeBob] I think it's our break time, don't you? [SpongeBob and Squidward run out of the Krusty Krab, screaming. The patty eats the Krusty Krab whole and chases them.]
 * Plankton: [watching the scene from the rooftop of the Chum Bucket with a telescope] What's this? [puts down the telescope] Krabs is cooking up some new scheme to undermine the success of his biggest competitor? ME?! [folds the telescope] Ah, I'd better get a closer look. [exits the Chum Bucket] [SpongeBob and Squidward are still running] Out of my way, you fools!
 * SpongeBob: [skids to a stop, while Squidward keeps running] Plankton, you're going the wrong way! Turn back or be crushed by a giant monster!
 * Plankton: [keeps running] I can't hear you! I need to see this! [Plankton skids and falls backwards] Holy mother of all creatures great and small! [The patty gets closer] It's the largest Krabby Patty the world has ever seen! It's... it's... gorgeous... [Plankton runs over to the patty, which gets closer] Oh, great patty! Take me! Take me home, daddy! [jumps into the patty]
 * Dale: [The Bikini Bottom citizens see the patty and start running away] Keep running, it's getting closer!
 * Fish: No, it isn't! Look! Where I'm pointing! It stopped!
 * Dale: [They stop running and look] Hey! He's right! [The giant patty is actually stopping from a stoplight. It turns green and the patty gets closer. They run again]
 * [Police officer tickets a car, only for it to be swallowed by the giant patty]
 * [The giant patty then proceeds to eat the entire town]
 * Lady in Green: Snookums! Look out! [pulls the pet worm away from the patty] You've got to promise mommy you'll be more careful! Neptune knows what he'd do if you were swallowed by the purtrid ooze that's running rampid in our streets. [Gets swallowed by krabby patty]
 * [Scene changes to Spongebob seeing Gary sleeping at SpongeBob's home]
 * SpongeBob: Gary! Gary wake up! Pack up your stuff! Our house is about to be knocked over by a giant krabby patty!
 * [Gary yawns and goes back to sleep]
 * [SpongeBob takes Gary and runs screaming out of his house, which then gets eaten by the giant krabby patty; SpongeBob runs to Patrick's house and opens the rock]
 * SpongeBob: Wake up Patrick! We gotta get out of here!
 * Patrick: Huh...oh hi, SpongeBob. I just had the strangest dream, I was being chased by a giant krabby patty.
 * SpongeBob: That wasn't a dream!
 * [The two run screaming away from the rock, which ends up being swallowed by the Giant Krabby Patty]
 * Patrick: SpongeBob! What do we do?
 * SpongeBob: We'll find Sandy, she'll know what to do!
 * [they run to Sandy's house which is broken with the dome shattered to bits.]
 * Patrick: I don't think she's home SpongeBob.
 * SpongeBob: She has to be, this is her treedome! Sandy where are you?
 * Sandy: SpongeBob?
 * [SpongeBob opens up a toliet next to him thinking Sandy is in it.]
 * SpongeBob: Sandy?
 * Sandy: No SpongeBob! Up here! [waves to SpongeBob from helicopter] And hurry! I'm running out of coconut milk!
 * [Cues to SpongeBob, Patrick, Gary, and Sandy in the helicopter]
 * SpongeBob: Wow, what happened to your treedome?
 * Sandy: Well that giant soy bean got too big, so I chopped it up into a giant salad. Anyone got any giant cruitans?
 * Patrick: ...I think I'm gonna be sick.
 * SpongeBob: What's wrong Patrick? Airsickness?
 * Patrick: No...the thought of a salad that size is more than I can handle.
 * Sandy: And now that I've mastered the soy bean, I can master that patty.
 * SpongeBob: Really how?
 * Sandy: The puzzle cube told me. The key to defeating the patty is you SpongeBob! All I have to do is get you closer to the patty so that you can make direct contact.
 * SpongeBob: Direct contact!? Are you sure?
 * Sandy: The puzzle cube never lies.
 * [We then see the Giant Krabby Patty moving]
 * Sandy: Alright, we have visual. Putting you into position SpongeBob.
 * [SpongeBob climbs down via a ladder]
 * SpongeBob: Okay bye. [Ladder is hoisted back up]
 * SpongeBob: Well giant patty, I guess it's just you and me. Wait what was I supposed to do again?
 * Sandy: Just make direct contact!
 * SpongeBob: Direct contact, you mean like this?
 * [Spongebob touchs the giant patty with his finger. He then absorbs it]
 * Sandy: It's working! Keep going! You can do it!
 * SpongeBob: Body, filling with Krabby Patty. Enormous strain.
 * [Krabby patty spits out buildings]
 * SpongeBob: Never absorbed this much Krabby Patty into my body before! In fact, I've never absorbed any Krabby Patties into my body come to think of it!
 * [He entirely absorbs it. The buildings and people in Bikini Bottom are freed. Spongebob is now huge and Krabby Patty colored]
 * SpongeBob: Ok...what do I do now?
 * [Scene changes to Krusty Krab where Mr. Krabs is on a box announcing the new Pre-Absorbed Patties via SpongeBob]
 * Mr. Krabs: Step right up folks, for a limited time, free absorbed Krabby Patties!
 * [Squidward opens the cash register; he proceeds to talk into a walkie-talkie]
 * Squidward: SpongeBob! Two! Medium Rare.
 * SpongeBob: [also talking into walkie-talkie] Copy that. Over.
 * [SpongeBob (still in Krabby Patty form), and proceeds to make the Krabby Patties with drips of Krabby Patties from his finger, while Mr. Krabs speaks to the crowd]
 * Mr. Krabs: That's it! Don't crowd! While supplies last, don't be shy! Come on!
 * [Two Krabby Patty meats drop to the grill]
 * [SpongeBob laughs, the screen fades out, and the episode ends]