The Brain Browl Incubation


 * Sheldon: (to Amy, seductively, and while holding a glass of brandy) Care for a brandy?
 * Amy: I don't think so.
 * Sheldon: Good choice, it's disgusting.


 * Leonard: Why does he need a baby? He's already hairless and smells like talcum powder.
 * Penny: Could you two really have a super-intelligent child?
 * Amy: Well there is a genetic component, but that doesn't guarantee anything.
 * Leonard: That's true. Sheldon's father once picked a fight with a cactus.
 * Penny: Yeah, but that's just his Earth parents. We don't know anything about the ones that sent him here.
 * Leonard: Well, we know they were smart enough to send him away.


 * Sheldon: [impressed] I have to say, it is nice to share this with someone who's on the same journey. Although, right now ours is testing off the charts while yours is floating around in it's own waste.
 * Bernadette: [cross] Are you actually comparing my human baby to your brain in a bowl.
 * Sheldon: Well, I didn't make you waddle up four flights of stairs for the heck of it.
 * Bernadette: You do realize my baby has functioning organs and can recognizes voices.
 * Sheldon: Yeah, but ours can recognize a specific data stream among background noises.
 * Bernadette: Mine has a fully developed immune system.
 * Sheldon: Ours doesn't need an immune system because it lives in a state-of-the-art German incubator.
 * Amy: Sheldon, that's enough.
 * Sheldon: Alright, you know what? Fine. Let's just agree that both creations are special in their own way, and it's foolish to compare them. [in a half-whisper to Amy] Although, we didn't need to have sex with Howard for ours, so we win.


 * Raj: Hold on. Is that a wobble? Yes. There’s definitely a gravitational wobble.
 * Isabella: Uh, sorry. I can could come back.
 * Raj:: Oh, no. It’s okay. I-I just found a wobble.
 * Isabella: Oh, do I need a mop?
 * Raj: It’s a gravitational wobble. It could be a sign of an extra-solar planet that may contain life and someday be named after me.
 * Isabella: Oh, well, if there is life maybe it already has a name?


 * Sheldon: And you realize what the next step is?
 * Amy: Set up a second culture and try to replicate our results.
 * Sheldon: Uh, no. We lock that door, lower our underpants a little and make a baby.
 * Amy: Make a baby? What are you talking about?
 * Sheldon: Clearly the combination of our DNA is exceptional. Eh…Our child could be the next step in the evolution of mankind. We-we we’ll be able to get into any preschool we want.
 * Amy: Sh-sheldon, I’m next ready to have a baby.
 * Sheldon: Oh yes, yes you are. I track your cycle. For the next 36 hours you’re a fertile as a manure covered wheat field.
 * Amy: Wow, I can actually feel the egg crawling its way back up.
 * Sheldon: I don’t understand. I thought you’d be thrilled to procreate wilt me?
 * Amy: Not right now.
 * Sheldon: I see what’s happening here. You’re playing hard to get.
 * Amy: I’m not playing anything. We’re not making a baby today.
 * Sheldon: Very well. [Drops pencil.] Oops, how clumsy of me. You know what? Let me get that. Hey. Where are you going? I.. Did you even look at my bottom?


 * Amy: [Sees trail of rose petals] Aw, man!
 * Penny: Oh, Sheldon’s gonna get some.
 * Leonard: Well, have fun with whatever nightmare’s behind door number two.
 * Sheldon: [Walks in on Sheldon.] Well, hello.
 * Amy: Hello.
 * Sheldon: Would you care for a brandy?
 * Amy: I don’t think so.
 * Sheldon: Good choice. It’s disgusting.
 * Amy: Sheldon, please stop trying to seduce me.
 * Sheldon: Who’s trying to seduce you? After a long day I always turn on some smooth jazz and spray deer musk on my inner thighs.
 * Amy: I thought is smelled like a petting zoo in here.
 * Sheldon: Anything you’d like to pet? Not my hair. There’s a lot of goop in it.
 * Amy: Okay, I’ve had enough. [Leaves.]
 * Sheldon: Amy come back! I don’t know how to open the oysters.


 * Penny: So were you turned on even a little bit?
 * Amy: It was like being hit on by Rat Pack Pee-wee Herman.
 * Leonard: I’m sorry, is that a yes?
 * Amy: No!
 * Sheldon: [Sheldon enters.] Amy. I didn’t want it to come to this, but you left me no choice but to employ the most seductive dance known to man. The flamenco.
 * Amy: For God’s sake, you’re ridiculous. [Leaves.]
 * Sheldon: You guys are aroused, right?
 * (Penny and Leonard are confused and speechless)
 * Amy: [Breathing heavily.] That was a close one.