Sabes Gay, It's George's Fantasy Episode


 * Ernie: Anything happening?


 * George: Okay. Were you wearing that when I came in here?
 * Ernie: George. George. George. George, George, George, wake up. Your're missing a great game. S.C. is about to score.
 * George: Sorry, man. I must have dozed off.
 * Ernie: Yeah, hey, dude, hand me that "TV Guide." I want to see who's playing in the next game.
 * George: What'd you do that for? They didn't score.
 * Ernie: I know.
 * Angie: Here, guys. Try these.
 * Ernie: Mmm.
 * George: They're pretty good.
 * Ernie: Yeah, these are fabulous.
 * Angie: Finally. You two are the thoughest customers I've ever had.
 * Ernie: Well, we just want everything to be perfect for our special day. I mean, we're only getting married once. Right, Pumpkin?
 * George: Hey, man, stop it.
 * Ernie: Oh, somebody call Snow White, because Grumpy's on my couch.
 * George: What's going on, Man? What are you talking about, getting married?
 * Ernie: He's always a little loopy when he gets up from a nap. I f you back out of our wedding now, I'm gonna keep the engagement ring you got me.
 * George: Engagement ring? What?
 * Ernie: Don't be modest. It's beautiful. Mira.
 * Angie: I am so glas you love it.
 * Ernie: Mm.
 * Angie: I helped George pick it out. It looked good on my finger, too. (Chuckles) (Sobbing) Why can't I get a man?
 * George: So this is real? This is my life? We're actually engaged, and we're getting married?
 * Ernie: Yeah, and when we're married It's gonna be great because It's gonna be like this every day. Sabes Que? Football, Beer and best buds.
 * George: I guess I could get used to that.
 * Ernie: That's my man.
 * George: But that's gonna take some time.


 * Ernie: Oh, man. He's gonna go all the way. Go! Go! Go! Yes. Touchdown! (Laughs) Dude, they scored. What's the matter with you?
 * George: What happened at work is still bothering me.
 * Ernie: Forget about it. That's why we watch the game.
 * George: I can't believe Jack humiliated me in front of all the workers like that.
 * Ernie: Oh, look at that trainer rubbing Tom Brady's thigh. I should have never dropped out message school.
 * George: Did you hear a word I said?
 * Ernie: Hush. I want to see this.
 * George: Don't hush me. If I want to talk, I'll talk.
 * Ernie: At least save it until halftime.
 * George: Yeah, right. Like you'll be able to listen when you see Troy Aikman drawing Xs and Os on the screen. You know, those aren't hugs and kisses for you.
 * Ernie: Well, there's a TV in the bathroom. Maybe I should go up and watch the game.
 * George: Maybe you should because nothing else is happening in that bathroom tonight.


 * Ernie: (Gasps) Aah!


 * Angie: How's Ernie doing?
 * George: He's okay. Don't worry about it.
 * Angie: I'm so glad he decided to let me come to the wedding. That kiss was just a stupid mistake on my part.
 * George: (Chuckles) Yeah, I mean, can you imagine us actually hooking up? Your soft skin, long hair... and all those curves...No, thank you. You're the priest? You look exactly like Angie's dad Vic.
 * Vic: And I sound like him, too. Confusing? Then don't eat the worm, Chico.
 * George: What?
 * (Richard Wagner's "Bridal Chorus' playing)
 * Angie: (Mouths words)
 * Vic: Our grooms have written their own vows, and they'd like to share them with everyone.
 * George: Ernie. When you said you wanted us to write our own vows, I'll be honest, I wasn't looking forward to it.
 * Ernie: (Mutters)
 * George: It's hard for me to look inside... and share when I'm feeling, but you help me do that, and as painful as it is, it makes me a better person... Now, I wanna thank you for that.
 * Ernie: Why are you looking at her? You're marrying me.
 * George: No, I'm not. I just realized. I can't marry you.
 * Ernie: (Whimpers) What?
 * George: I want to marry somebody I can talk to. Wait a minute. I'm not even gay, man. I love Angie.
 * Ernie: How can you say that? (Sobbing)