How Scream Should Have Ended


 * (In Casey's house, we hear the phone ringing)
 * Casey: (picks up the phone) "Hello?"
 * Billy: (on the phone) "Do you like scary movies?"
 * (Outside at the front door, we see Billy as Ghostface#1 costume and we see Stu as Ghostface#2 costume at the pool to get ready to attack her)
 * Casey: "No. I'm more of a romantic comedy typer person. Good-bye forever." (hangs up her phone)
 * (Meanwhile, we see Randy making an announcement at home with his friends)
 * Randy: "There are certain rules that one must divide in order to successfully survive a horror movie. Rule #1: Have parents that care about you."
 * (a scene shows Rule #1: a boy having dinner with his parents)
 * Boy: "Mom, Dad. Can I go to a party? Err... I mean... Uh... Spend the night at a friend's house tonight?"
 * Mother: (she laughs) "STUPID CHILD! You're not leaving this house. There's a mask murderer on the loose."
 * Boy: (pounds the table) "YOU NEVER LET ME DO ANYTHING!" (leaves)
 * Randy: "Rule #2: Don't date crazy a holes."
 * (a scene shows Rule #2: Billy and Sidney having a date at school)
 * Billy: "Come on, Sid. I know someone just tried to kill you and all. But why won't you do it with me?"
 * Sidney: "Because... Billy, I'm not a slug that just puts out all the time!"
 * Billy: "So... You're saying you're not like your mom?"
 * Sidney: "WHAT?!"
 * Billy: "Nothing. Stab. Stabby stab."
 * Randy: "Rule #3: If you are being attacked inside a house that is filled with people who are your friends, you should call out for their help."
 * (three scenes show Tatum attacked in the garage, Sidney attacked upstairs (with Billy wounded after being stabbed by Stu and he seemingly falls dead and Stu as Ghostface #2 is shown), and Principle Himbry attacked at school)
 * Tatum: "AAAAHHHH! HELP ME! I'M TRAPPED IN THE GARAGE WITH THE KILLER!" (four friends arrive)
 * Friend #1: (to Ghostface) "Hey, you!"
 * Friend #2: "Get him!"
 * Friend #3: "GET HIM!" (all four of them attack Ghostface)
 * Ghostface #1: "AGH!"
 * Sidney: "HELP ME! I'M TRAPPED UPSTAIRS WITH THE KILLER!" (Randy arrives)
 * Randy: "What? Let's get him!" (he attacks Stu in his Ghostface costume)
 * Stu: "AGH! AGH!"
 * Principle Himbry: "Hey, someone help me! I'm trapped in school with the killer! (no one arrives) Aw man. (Ghostface kills him) AAAAAAHHHH!"
 * Randy: "Rule #4: "If friends aren't available, do more than just run. If you knock a killer off his feet, because he's wearing a ridiculous costume with terrible visibility. You have the upper hand! Don't keep running! Take that sucker out! Kick him in the throat! Do something! The dude is going to kill you!"
 * (while Randy explains the fourth rule, the scene shows Rule #4 with Sidney running from Ghostface #1. As Ghostface tripped when Sidney slammed the door on him, she comes back out to see him knocked out and is ready to teach him a lesson)
 * Sidney: "ER! (she steps on him) HA! (she steps on him real hard) ER! AH! RA! (she continues killing him and she removes the mask) Whaaaaat?"
 * Randy: "Rule #5: Don't live where the police and investigator reporters are terrible at their jobs."
 * (a scene shows Dewey Riley dating Gale Weathers in a swamp and apparently they don't realize they're sinking in quicksand)
 * Dewey Riley: "Let's never ever ever ever ever break up. Ever ever ever ever e..." (scene cuts back to Randy)
 * Randy: "Which brings me to Rule #6: 911 and Star 69."
 * Freddy Krueger: (off-screen) "I have a question."
 * Randy: "Yeah, you in the hat?"
 * Freddy Kruger: (off-screen) "What do you do when the killer attacks you inside your dreams?"
 * Randy: "Well that's something entirely different. If that happens, you just... (catches himself) OH, NO!" (scene cuts to Freddy Kruger, the killer from A Nightmare on Elm Street)
 * Freddy Krueger: (shows his clawed glove) "OH, YES!" (he chases everyone)
 * (the scene cuts to 'THE END' and we hear everyone screaming when Freddy is chasing them)
 * Randy: "RUN! EVERYBODY, RUN! FORGET THE RULES, ALL YOU COULD DO IS RUN!"
 * Freddy Krueger: "YOU'RE MINE NOW! HA HA HA HA HA!"
 * Randy: "AGH! BELIEVERS ARE GONNA SUCK SO BAD!"
 * (after the credits, the scene cuts to Casey in her house and we see Stu and Billy in their Ghostface costumes and they tried to kill her, but they accidentally triggered two traps which caused two tied hanging paint buckets to hit both of them and the two have 'kicked the bucket', meaning they were both killed)
 * Casey: (puts her thumb up) "Mmhm."