Say Uncle (The Powerpuff Girls)

(Opening shot: the city of Longville at day.)

Narrator: The city of Longville, Minnesota, the turtle-racing capital of the world!

(Pan to factory polluting the skies.)

Narrator: Turle-neck and turtle-neck here at the track.

Man #1: That Sheldon's a peppy fella.

Man #2: Ooh yeah, it's all those hours he put in during the off-season.

Buddy: Way to show 'em what you're made of, Sheldon! Meanwhile, back in the City of Townsville, Professor Utonium is getting ready for a very big day.

Bubbles: What'cha doing, Professor?

Professor Utonium: Well, Bubbles, I'm getting ready for a very big day. There's a scientific exposition at the Townsville convention centre, and you're looking at the key-note speaker. I'm giving a presentation on the proliferation on subatomic particles on the ribonucleic plain. And its relationship to the proliferation of ribonucleic particles on the subatomic plain. (l' ooks down at girls )

(Girls look back at Professor.)

Professor Utonium: Oh, it's really quite fascinating, isn't it?

(Girly blankly look at each other, then back to the Professor. The doorbell rings.)

Girls: I'll get it! (Girls rush to the door and fling it open.)

Mailman: Hello! Important telegram from Professor Utonium!

Blossom: A telegram?

Mailman: (Waves paper frantically in the air) That's right - an important telegram!

Buttercup: Thanks. (Buttercup snatches telegram out of mailman's hands.)

Mailman: You're very welcome! Have a tella-rific day! (Girls slam the door in his face.)

Girls: Professor! Professor! Professor! (Girls fly to the Professor and hand him the telegram.)

Blossom: You have an important telegram!

Professor Utonium: A telegram?

Buttercup: Here. (Buttercup hands Professor the telegram.)

Professor Utonium: (Reads) Dear Professor, am coming to town this morning. Only here for the day. Want to see you and meet the girls. I'll be on the last train from Clarksville. Come me me at the station. Your brother, Eugene. Girls! Guess who's coming for a visit!

Blossom: Your brother Eugene?

Professor Utonium: (Professor takes the telegram.) Your Uncle, Eugene.

Girls: We have an Uncle?

Professor Utonium: Sure do. Ah, me and your Uncle Eugene used to get pretty crazy back in the day. He's quite the wild man. (draws picture from his pocket)

Buttercup: (Girls take a look at the picture with a default-looking Eugene) He doesn't look so wild to me. Hahaha... (Girls all laugh)

Professor Utonium: Ooh! But my big scientific lecture! Oh, I won't have time to pick him up!

Blossom: We could pick him up, Professor.

Buttercup and Bubbles: Yeah, we'll do it!

Professor Utonium: That’s a great idea, girls. You can spend the day getting to know your Uncle Eugene while I'm at the conference

(Girls beam at Professor. Fade and pan to the train station, zoom in to one of the cars of the train.)

Policeman #1: Alright, alright. Now look: all you gotta do is sit on this here stool, (points at stool) and make sure that that wild fella in there don't cause no ruckus. (points to covered cage.) You think you can handle that?

(Second policeman salutes as first policeman walks away grumpily.)

Policeman #2: Sure thing.

(After noticing the first policeman gone, the second policeman takes out a box and takes a seat on the stool' . )

Policeman #1: Oh, yeah, one more thing: this guy (points) is nuts over taffy, he was crazy from the salty-sweet tang. So whatever you do, do not let him near any taffy. Got it? (Walks away.)

(Second policeman opens the box, and finds it loaded with taffy.)

Policeman #2: Boy, did I pick the wrong day to start my all-taffy diet. (hesitates) Oh, well!

(Second policeman gets out a flask and pours the pink taffy into a cup, slowly. The taffy finally stops flowing, and he gets out his taffy sandwich and takes a bite out of that as well. He has a hard time pulling the taffy as to bite it, and suddenly the cage bursts open, causing dust around the train car to splatter everywhere. The "wild fella" appears and stands behind the second policeman. The second policeman, still struggling to pull out the taffy from the bread, looks up scared. He finds the "wild fella" glaring at him, so the second policeman offers him his taffy, and his hard taffy once standing, droops down. The policeman offers the taffy to the "wild fella", this time more clearly, and the "wild fella" takes it.)

(The gesture is ruined by the sounding of the horn, meaning that the trains have arrived. People walk out of their train cars.)

Buttecup: What about that guy?

(Zoom out to the Girls looking at the picture, people and back again.)

Blossom: I don't think so.

(The "wild fella" suddenly breaks the train car, leaving a hole in the middle. He hops onto the platform and looks around curiously.)

(Snap to Bubbles who is holding the picture now.)

[Continuity error: Instead of just Bubbles holding the picture just now, Blossom was more likely to be holding it.]

Bubbles: Ooh! Is that him?

(Blossom slowly takes the picture from Blossom, and looks at it, then him back and forth to view their similarities. Apparantly, the "wild fella" and Uncle Eugene have the same brow.)

Blossom: Well, he is pretty tall.

Buttercup: And he's got red hair...

Bubbles: Lots of it! (Bubbles is seen flying over to "Uncle Eugene"' . )

Blossom: Uncle Eugene? ("Uncle Eugene" expresses himself as alarmed.) We're your nieces:

Girls: The Powerpuff Girls!

Blossom: Professor has a very important meeting so he sent us here to pick you up!

Bubbles: (Flies in front of Blossom) And we get to spend the whole day getting to know each other! (Girls fly to "Uncle Eugene".)

Blossom: So, how was your trip?

Buttercup: D'you have any tattoos?

Bubbles: What's your favorite color?

Blossom: Have any luggage?

Buttercup: How much can you bench?

Blossom: You must be pretty hungry after that long train ride!

(Bubbles offers "Uncle Eugene" some taffy.)

Bubbles: Wants some of my Townsville taffy?

("Uncle Eugene"'s eyes break into bloodshot ones, as he has an obsession with taffy. He snatches it and chews it in delight.)

Bubbles: Here, have some more! (Bubbles throws him another piece of taffy.)

Wild fella (Uncle Eugene): Good, good. Good! Good! (Chews taffy.)

Blossom: Well, we better be going! Can't be late for school.

Buttercup: (Girls fly away) Follow us, Uncle Eugene!

("Uncle Eugene" chases the Girls, for her wants more taffy.)

Wild fella (Uncle Eugene): Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme. Gimme!

(Pan to the real Uncle Eugene, who is the last one to step out of the train car. He looks around for the Girls and/or Professor, and holds out a picture however they are nowhere to be seen. Cut to Pokey Oaks Kindergarten.)

Ms. Keane: Thank you, Mitch, for showing us your wonderful collection of...assorted earwaxes. Okay, girls. What did you bring for show and tell today?

(Pan to Girls about to show the class a surprise.)

Blossom: Well, we brought our Uncle Eugene.

Ms. Keane: Oh, how exciting―*screams*

(Pan back to the Girls, however Uncle Eugene barges effortlessly into the doorway and breaks the door, leaving a hole in the wall. He marches up to Miss Keane and leaves a shadow on her, while the rest of the class is in awe.)

Bubbles: Ms. Keane, this is our Uncle!

(Ms. Keane shakes in fear and tries to say hello.)

Ms. Keane: (shakes) N-nice to meet you.

(Buttercup flies over to Ms. Keane and Bubbles.)

Buttercup: He's the Professor's brother!

Ms. Keane: Great! Ugh,, why don't you show your freakishly...handsome Uncle to his seat (directs "Uncle Eugene" to his seat slowly) so Julie Bean can have her turn?

(Julie Bean walks over to the front and the Girls and "Uncle Eugene" walk over to their seats, "Uncle Eugene"'s large footsteps filling the sound of the classroom.)

Julie Bean: This weekend, my parents took me to the Townsville Taffy Festival, so I brought this big box of taffy for everyone!

("Uncle Eugene"'s eyes widen again, and he is curious if he heard it right.)

Wild fella (Uncle Eugene): Huh? Hmm...?

(Students run over to Julie Bean and get the taffy from her.)

Students: Yay! Taffy!

(Students look up at "Uncle Eugene" and find him standing behind them, demanding the taffy.)

Wild fella (Uncle Eugene): Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! (roars)

Students: *screams*

(Ms. Keane faints and the Girls stare at him blankly. Transit back to the train station, the real Uncle Eugene is still waiting for the Girls, sitting on the bench and looking around. He looks at his watch. Transit back to Pokey Oaks Kindergarten again, the students run away from "Uncle Eugene" as he chases them for the taffy.)

Students: *screams*

(The girls fly outside.)

Blossom: Wait! It's okay! He's just playing!

(Slightly panning to the girl student running away, she exclaims in terror' . )

Girl student: This monster's gonna eat us all! (runs with "Uncle Eugene" chasing her behind.)

(Panning stops by the Girls' . )

Bubbles: He's no monster! He's our Uncle!

Buttercup: He's just a little wild.

(Cut to three other students running away from "Uncle Eugene", throwing him their taffy as he eats them while he runs. He stops, and sees that a Townsville Taffy Fair is right in front of him' . His pupils enlarge in fascination as the Taffy Fair is extremely large. He jumps up and down on his feet and dashes to the fair, ripping up his first stall and scoffing down all the taffy. The stall man runs away as "Uncle Eugene" throws the stall away as well. )

Man: I can't believe got such a great deal on taffy trousers. ("Uncle Eugene" steals them. Man looks at himself but optimistically.) Well, at least I still have this snappy taffy tee! (Pulls down shirt at knee-length to cover underwear. "Uncle Eugene" comes back and takes the shirt as well.) Aww, poofers. (Walks away slowly.) Powerpuff Girls! Boy, am I glad to see you! Some crazy monster just ate my pants!

Bubbles: Really?

Buttercup: What did he look like?

Man: Oh, I don't know, kinda tall, red, hairy?

Backgrounder man: My taffy marial!

Backgrounder woman: My taffy taffy!

Man: He must be stopped before the whole town is left in various states of undress - will you guys stop him?

(Cut to the Girls who are brainstorming.)

Bubbles: We have to do something!

Blossom: But what? He's our Uncle, we can't just knock him out!

(Transit back to their house, with "Uncle Eugene" sitting unconciously on their couch with the Girls standing in front of him' . )

Buttercup: What else was I supposed to do? He had it coming! Right? Right?

(Girls continuosly shake their heads' . )

Blossom: Let's at least try to clean him up before the Professor get home. (Girls spontaneously dresses "Uncle Eugene" up in clothes, however his expression doesn't change. Bubbles tries to make it better by combing his arm's hair, but it bounces back up again. Blossom helps by cleaning taffy on his face, but the taffy magically appears back. Buttercup even tries shaving "Uncle Eugene", but his hair grows back quickly.)

Professor Utonium: Girls? I'm home!

Girls: *all gasp in alarm*

Buttercup: Hey, Professor! Is it me? Or is he looking even smarter?

(The Girls stall Professor as much as they can, by complimenting him and flying in front of him.)

Professor Utonium: Well...

Bubbles: Yeah, much smarter!

Professor Utonium: Oh, I don't know!

(Cut to Blossom's face.)

Blossom: You must've given some presentation today!

(Blossom does a flattering stare and tries to make her statement sound convincing' . )

Professor Utonium: Well, I did throw my colleagues a few algorithmic zingers!

Girls: (All nervously giggle)

Professor Utonium: So, where's that crazy brother of mine?

Girls: Oh, (All stutter and stumble their words)

Buttercup: Yeah, there.

Professor Utonium: Oh. He's really let his hair over a while! Well. While we're waiting for Uncle Eugene to wake up from one of his famous naps, why don't we have a little Townsville taffy!

("Uncle Eugene" wakes up suddenly.)

Wild fella (Uncle Eugene): Good! Good! OOH! Good! Good!

(Professor exclaims)

Blossom: Is that the train I hear?

Professor Utonium: Umm... Does he have to go already?

Blossom: I'm afraid so.

("Uncle Eugene" continues to chase Professor around until Blossom and Buttercup tie him up in taffy and carry him to the train station.)

Professor Utonium: (pants) Whew! That Eugene hasn't changed a bit!

(The girls fly directly above a train car and drop "Uncle Eugene" in a seat. The real Uncle Eugene sits next to him and offers him taffy. The episode ends with "Uncle Eugene" staring straight.)

Eugene Utonium: Beat, huh? ("Uncle Eugene" nods.) I've had a pretty rough day myself. But you know what they say: you can't end the day without feeling happy after biting into a sweet piece of Townsville taffy!

Narrator: And so, once again the day is saved—thanks to the Powerpuff Girls!