The Property Division Collision


 * Bernadette: (touched) Stuart, you cooked?
 * Howard: How do you know it wasn't me?
 * Bernadette: There's only three people in this house, and you'd still be my fifth guess.
 * (doorbell rings)
 * Howard: That's Raj.
 * Stuart: You guys relax, I'll get it. Have some bread while it's still warm.
 * Howard: Ha. It's like we have a butler. If I had a Batsuit, I'd be Bruce Wayne.
 * Bernadette: You have a Batsuit.
 * Howard: It's pajamas. There's no cape.


 * Amy: Look, we can’t just throw away Penny’s stuff, but we can ask her if she wants any of it back.
 * Sheldon: You know, I was wondering how she feels about all this artwork.
 * Amy: Well, I’m sure she misses this one. I mean, it’s the greatest I’ve ever given anybody.
 * Sheldon: It truly does capture the beauty of your friendship with Penny.
 * Amy: It may have appreciated in value. The artist killed himself shortly after painting that.
 * Penny: Yeah it only seems right that she should have it back.
 * Amy: I can’t wait to see the look on her face when I give it to her again.
 * Sheldon: [Standing in front of Penny.] Look, it’s the same smile she has in the painting.


 * Leonard: Hey guys, what are you…? Oh, that’s here. Cool.
 * Penny: Amy wants me to have it.
 * Amy: Well, it would be selfish of me to keep it.
 * Penny: But it’s a picture of you.
 * Amy: And you.
 * Penny: But you commissioned it.
 * Amy: To give to you.
 * Penny: But you like it so much.
 * Amy: So do you.
 * Penny: I seem to be losing.
 * Leonard: Yes, you do.


 * Leonard: You’re good at revenge, how do we get him back?
 * Penny: Well, my go-to move is usually to sleep with the person’s boyfriend but I kind of feel like I’m already doing that.


 * Amy: I got the Neoprene. Who got hurt?
 * Sheldon: It’s a good thing you’re cute.


 * Theodore: It’s like the 40’s again.


 * Theodore: Excuse me. It’s none of my business, but it sounds a lot like of this anger is coming from love.
 * Leonard: Yeah, thanks, but nobody asked you.
 * Theodore: Well, I’m just gonna keep on talking. Seems like with Sheldon moving out you’re in a new phase of your lives and it’s easier to fight than to face the feelings you have for one another.
 * Amy: I think he might be right. Also, who is that?


 * Bernadette: Howard!
 * Howard: Guys, you heard her. Go see what she wants.
 * Bernadette: I think I’m in labor.
 * Howard: Oh, oh, okay. Okay, uh, uh, uh, I can do this. We have a plan. Somebody please tell me the plan.
 * Stuart: I’ll get the hospital bag.
 * Raj: I’ll pull the van up. Meet me outside in two minutes.
 * Raj and Stuart: Team baby, go!
 * Howard: I love you.
 * Bernadette: I love you, too.
 * Stuart: Are we hugging or having a baby? Let’s go.