Dr. Blowhole's Revenge

Desert
''The Penguins are in a cactus and they move to a house. Kowalski, Private and Skipper come out of the top and Kowalski breathes and Rico comes out from the bottom.''

Skipper: Rico, weapons check.

''Rico shakes all of his body. Clanging, crashing, clicking, and whirring sounds are heard.''

Skipper: Kowalski? Intelligence.

Kowalski: Substantially above average, but I don't like to brag.

Skipper glances a look.

Kowalski: Oh, the map. Right here.

He shows him the map.

Skipper: Private? Snack cakes.

''Private holds out his flipper to reveal three snack cakes. The nilla cream sparkles.''

Private: Swiss Delight, Nilla Cream, and a Peanut Butter Winky.

Skipper: All right, men, let's move in.

Aside to Private as Kowalski and Rico move on.

Skipper: Private, dibs on the Peanut Butter Winky.

Inside the wood house
Skipper uses his flipper to open the lock of the door and they went inside.

Skipper: Easy does it, men. This could well be a trap.

The penguins sneak over to some crates.

Skipper: Rico.

''Rico sticks out his tongue, holding a coin. Skipper takes the coin and tosses it across the room to the middle of the floor. It stops and the platform rises, hitting the ceiling, and comes back down.''

Kowalski: Well played, Skipper.

Skipper: It seems Dr. Blowhole isn't as smart as he thinks he is...!

''The house immediately shoots down and a series of spikes stick out of the ceiling. The sides fell down and the penguins are on the ceiling, dodging the spikes. ''

Dr. Blowhole's Lair
Private: I don't think the peanut butter winky made it, Skipper.

The peanut butter winky is cut through and chocolate covers the spike.

Skipper: Curse you, Blowhole!

''The spikes disappear, the penguins got down, and the house goes back up. Suddenly, a dolphin noise is heard; lights come on a flipper, heading straight for them. The flipper rises and the flipper appears to be none other then Dr. ...''

Skipper: Blowhole.

Blowhole: Well, Pen-you-ins, we meet once again.

Skipper: Well, well, Blowhole, it's been a long time.

Blowhole: Well, well, well, too long.

Skipper: Well, well, well, well...

Blowhole: Enough!

He rises out of the water, using a machine that allows him to roam around on land.

Blowhole: I suppose you are wondering why it is that I have laid a ridiculously complicated trap for you.

Private: Actually, yes I am.

The Penguins turn to glare at him.

Blowhole: Why tell when I can show? You will appreciate this, Kowalski.

Blowhole presses a green button and a TV with stereo speakers appear.

Blowhole: I have installed a lair theater system. High-Definition with Surround Sound. Extreeeeeeeemely spendy.

Kowalski: Oh, why do the bad guys always get the good stuff?

Blowhole: Hey, hey, hey. Eyes on the big screen. See?

The screen shows a picture of a lobster.

Skipper: Delicious dipped in butter. What's your point?

Blowhole: Now, imagine, this crustacean had an exoskeleton of.... shiny metal!

The claw enlarges to demonstrate the metal.

Blowhole: Pen-you-ins, I present...

He presses the green button.

Deep Voice: Chrome Claw!

Blowhole: Mmm. Did you feel that sub-woofer?

Kowalski: (jealous) Ah, he's just rubbing my face in it.

Blowhole: Without you Pen-you-ins around to foil my plans, I will unleash...

He presses the button.

Deep Voice: Chrome Claw!

Blowhole: ...on an unsuspecting world. With mutant monster at my side, I will rule land and sea!

''He cackles, until he falls backwards on his vehicle. Then, he comes back up.''

Private: Um, back up to that "without you" part, please.

Skipper: I get the gist. Rico!

''Rico spat out a bunch of weapons including a flamethrower, a chainsaw, a knife, an anchor, an aerosol spray can, a hammer, a crowbar, a bazooka, and a black "cartoon" bomb. But a magnet grabs them and takes them away.''

Rico: Uh-oh.

Suddenly, lasers appeared cocking, aiming for our flightless birds.

Skipper: We got us a laser show, boys.

Blowhole: Who's foiled now?

''The lasers fired and the penguins dodged them. Then, Skipper remembers something.''

Skipper: Foil? Private, snack cakes!

Private: Is this really the time to--

Skipper: Private!

''Private holds out his flipper and passes the Nilla Cream to Skipper. Skipper uses the snack as a shield against the lasers. It bounced back to Blowhole, missing him. Skipper passes the cake to Rico and reflect the lasers back at the gun, destroying it.''

Blowhole: (confused) Say what?

Private: Kowalski!

''Private tosses the Swiss Delight to Kowalski, who throws it at the evil dolphin's blowhole. He gasps, struggling trying to get it out, but his flippers were to short to get it out, so he can breathe.''

Kowalski: Aspirate Swiss Delight, Bottlenose!

''Blowhole falls into the water. The penguins high-fived each other, and Dr. Blowhole rises out to the water again in a bubble vehicle.''

Blowhole: You have seen the last of Dr. Blowhole!

Skipper: (sarcastically) Good. Run.

Blowhole: Oh. You think... Right. Uh, I mean, this is the last you will see of anything!

He cackles as he flies out of the base.

Skipper: Oh.

Deep Voice: Self destruct in...

Scene II: The Zoo Food Court
Private: Five seconds! That's right. We had only five seconds. But we escaped with half of a second to spare! It was a ripping adventure.

The whole adventure turned out to be a real tale, told by Private, who was telling that to Marlene, Mason, Phil, and a chameleon.

Marlene:(sarcastic) Oh. Oh, so, a dolphin super-villain? No, I totally believe you.

Private: No, really, Marlene, he's our arch enemy. Pure evil. With skin that's surprisingly pleasant to the touch. (takes out a mission file.) Look, I've got the mission file to prove it.

Marlene, Phil, Mason and the Chameleon look at it, but Skipper lands on the book.

Skipper: Whoa, whoa, wah, hoo, wah, ha! That's top secret, Private. Eyes only. My eyes. Not even sure about your eyes. Leave alone her eyes.

Marlene glances a look and Kowalski and Rico come along.

Kowalski: Actually, Skipper, these files are de-classified now.

Skipper: Pin-head pencil pushers. They have no idea.

''Skipper sends the book to Marlene. They are drawings in the book.''

Marlene: Oh, they're... nice. Look, I know you guys do your commando thing around here, and you do it, you know, well. But come on.

Julien peeks from a brick wall.

Marlene: I mean, Secret lairs? Chrome Claw? Super-spy stuff? Please.

Julien appears.

Julien: Did you say spy? (laughs) I'm a spy. I've been spying on you this whole time.

He clicks his fingers and Maurice pushs a chair and Julien leaps on to it.

Julien: I could have a fancy spy-car that can shoot things out of the headlights. No, fog-lights. (gets in Marlene's face.) They won't expect that.

Skipper: (chuckles) You, Ring-tail? Facing the likes of Dr Blowhole? He's pure evil. With skin that's surprisingly pleasant to the touch. (gets in his face) You wouldn't last five minutes.

''The clock chimes nine. Opening time!''

Private: Oh dear. We're open.

''All the animals, except Julien. ran off to their habitats. The visitors enter. The kids are laughing. Julien returns home, upset.''

Scene III: Lemur Habitat
Julien: I still say I could be a spy guy.

''Then, Mort comes, tied and gagged by seaweed. He falls to his feet.''

Julien: Mort, if this is a ploy to get to the royal feet, it's very clever, but ineffective.

Muffled, Mort points with his ears.

Julien: What is that on you, anyway? You smell like the fish weed.

''A snapping sound is heard. Mort runs, and a mysterious creature is heading toward Julien.''

Julien: Whoa! Who the hecks are you? NOOOOO!

Julien is captured.

Scene IV: Penguin HQ (Outside)
Skipper, Kowalski and Rico are waving and Private is upset.

Skipper: Private!

Private: Sorry, Skipper. I'm not feeling very cute or cuddly today.

Kowalski: Oh, stop. You're always cute and cuddly and you know it.

Private: (joining the waving) I'm just cheesed that Marlene doesn't believe in Dr Blowhole.

Skipper: Better that she doesn't, Private. Imagine if she blabbed and that mad doctor discovered our secret zoo HQ.

Scene V: Dr. Blowhole's Lair
Blowhole has got an army of lobsters spying on the Penguins.

Lobster #1: Dr. Blowhole, satellite targeting has a lock on the enemy. And they are some way convenient.

He snaps his claws.

Blowhole: (cackles) Excellent work, Red One. Prepare Pen-you-in transmission.

There's a feedback noise.

Blowhole: Pen-you-ins, I have found you.

Scene VI: Penguin HQ (Outside)
Skipper: Blowhole.

...to be continued...