Chuck!

Narrator: It’s a typical day here in the city.

(Scene: Somewhere in the city. People are hanging out peacefully, except for one man with a red hat and olive green shirt who is running and screaming.)

Narrator: Don’t worry, that’s typical! Inside You Buy Gold, a villain threatens the peace… and the gold! Obviously.

Chuck: Just fill this big bag up with gold, and I’ll be on my way!

Gold Store Dealer: Yes, whatever you say, Mr.-- um…

Chuck: I’m Chuck, the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy, and I’m here to sh--

Gold Store Dealer  Wait! Your name is Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy?

Chuck: Yeah…

Gold Store Dealer: Then why are you stealing gold?! Shouldn’t you be stealing bread or something?

Chuck: Wha-- no, why would I steal bread?

Gold Store Dealer: You tell me, you’re the one who chose Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy!

Chuck: Yeah, but…

Gold Store Dealer: If you’re not going to steal sandwich stuff, you should have picked a different name!

Chuck: I, uh-- Be quiet!

Gold Store Dealer: I’m just saying, it’s a little  confusing !

Chuck: Oh, yeah? Let’s see if you find my mustard ray  confusing ! (Chuck fires his condiment ray at the man, covering him in mustard.)

Gold Store Dealer: Ahh!

Narrator: Meanwhile, in a nearby shopping plaza…

(Scene: The grocery store. Becky, Bob and her dad are shopping.)

Becky: Um, Dad? I love the grocery store as much as the next kid, but why did you bring us here?

Mr. Botsford: Because we need the ingredients for an old family recipe. It was my great-grandmother’s, and it’s been passed down for generations! It’s a family-- um…

Becky: A family  tradition ? It means to pass something down from generation to generation.

Mr. Botsford: Yes, that's it, of course! It’s a family  tradition . Why, you’re like my own personal little WordGirl!

Becky: WordGirl? No, I-I’m nothing like, uh-- so what’s the recipe?

Mr. Botsford: Oh, it’s a delightful dish called Beans ala Botsford! Let’s see-- anchovy paste, cheese paste, toothpaste-- (whispering) it provides the zing!

Becky: Eww!

Exposition Guy:  Help! Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy is robbing the Gold Store!

Mr. Botsford: Sweet cotton candy, that’s awful! But, why are you telling us?

Exposition Guy: Isn’t this the police station?

Mr. Botsford: No, that’s two buildings down.

Exposition Guy: Oh, thanks! He-e-elp!

Becky: (to Bob) Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy? We have to get out of here and stop him! (Bob concurs.) Um, Dad, Bob and I have to go to the-- uh, yarn store to, um, get some-- yarn! For, uh, a yarn project!

Mr. Botsford: (holding a cereal box) Oh, sure sweetie, I’ll see you at home. (Reading the back of the box) Hmm… “It’s Not Rice.” Well, if it’s not rice, then what is it?

Becky: Word UP! (transforms and takes off with Bob)

Narrator: Meanwhile, back at the scene of the crime…

Chuck: I’m taking this gold and you’re not gonna stop me!

Gold Store Dealer: Okay, but at least take my sandwich too!

Chuck: No! What am I gonna do with your sandwich? (looks at it) Wh-what is that, turkey, though?

Gold Store Dealer: Yeah, with lettuce, bacon, a splash of mayo.

Chuck: You know, for a guy that I’ve just frozen in mustard, you don’t seem very scared of me!

Gold Store Dealer: I’m too confused to be scared!

WordGirl: Up to your old tricks, Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy?

Chuck: WordGirl!

Gold Store Dealer: WordGirl? You’re shorter than I thought!

WordGirl: I look taller on TV. Your time is up, Chuck! There’s no way you’re leaving here with any gold!

Gold Store Dealer: Um, excuse me? Don’t you think it’s  confusing  that an evil sandwich guy is stealing gold?

WordGirl: Hmm… now that you mention it, it doesn’t make much sense. That’s what  confusing  means!

Gold Store Dealer: Yeah! You see?

Chuck: Enough! You think you could stop me, WordGirl? Well I have a question for you. (Points the condiment ray at her) Do you like honey butter? (Fires it onto her and Huggy)

WordGirl: Eww!

Chuck: Ha-ha-ha-ha! So long, sticky girl! (makes his getaway)

Narrator: Later, at the house of Botsford…

(Becky and Bob are sitting at the table, looking at a map.)

Becky: Uh, you still have a little butter-- (hands Bob a napkin, he rubs it behind his ear) Got it! We have to figure out where Chuck’s going to strike next! It could be anywhere-- (Bob offers some suggestions) The bookstore? Yeah. The toy store? I guess… Who robs the post office?? (He acts sad.)  Oh, don’t be like that! I just want to catch Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy before he strikes again!

Mr. Botsford: (surprising them) Why on earth would you want that? Isn’t that something WordGirl should do? (Bob jumps on the map to hide it)

Becky: Eh-heh-heh, I was just saying, I’m sure that’s what WordGirl is saying-- to her sidekick, Captain Huggy Face, right now!

Mr. Botsford: Why, that’s quite a WordGirl impression!

Becky: (changing the subject) Whacha got there?

Mr. Botsford: Oh, just a fabulous pot of Beans ala Botsford! (He hold out a pot containing a revolting mix of ingredients, including a fish head, fish tail, bones, and toothpaste. Bob makes a painful sound.)

Becky: I have to agree with Bob, that food looks really nauseating.

Mr. Botsford: Well trust me, it looks disgusting, but it tastes great! Want to lick the spoon?

Becky: Oh no, no.

Exposition Guy: (barging through the front door) Help! Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy is robbing the used car dealership!

Mr. Botsford: The used car dealership? Sweet magic pumpkins! Wait-- why are you telling us?

Exposition Guy: Isn’t this the police station?

Mr. Botsford: Oh no, you’re confused. It’s the next block over.

Exposition Guy: Oh, thanks. HEEELP!

Becky: (to Bob) This is our chance to stop Chuck once and for all! Let’s get out of here! (grabs Bob and assumes a flying position, with her arm extended) Word-- (looks over, and sees her dad staring at her) Oh, hey! Uh… just working on that… impression thing! We’re gonna go! (slinks away)

Mr. Botsford: Have fun!

(Scene: The Used Car Dealership. Chuck is standing next to the Used Car Salesman, who has his hands raised high. Next to them is a platform with a fancy car on display.)

Chuck: Now, give me the keys to the supercar or you’ll get a ketchup bath!

Used Car Salesman: Ahh! Don’t hurt my suit!

Chuck: From now on, everyone in this town will fear the name Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy!

Used Car Salesman: Wait a minute-- if your name is Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy, why are you stealin’ a car?

Chuck: What is it with you people?

Used Car Salesman: I’m just sayin’!

Chuck: Yeah? Well, you’re done sayin’, because I’m a-SPRAYIN’!

Used Car Salesman: Ahh! NOO!!

Chuck: And now, to steal the supercar!

Used Car Salesman: You should drive it to the bakery!

Chuck: No!

WordGirl: (arrives on the scene, landing on the hood of a car) Well well, Chuck, you just don’t quit, do you?

Chuck: You know, I’m getting pretty tired of you, WordGirl! Here comes olive oil! (sprays it on her, and she slips off of the car onto the ground.) Ha-ha-ha!

(Huggy jumps at Chuck, but also gets hit by the olive oil. Chuck gets into the supercar.)

Chuck: So long, WordGirl! (He starts the car, and the sound system blares and a disco ball starts turning. He drives away laughing.)

(This is followed by a montage of scenes. First, at the bank, the female bank teller is counting out money. Chuck walks up with his condiment gun to rob them, and she offers up a sandwich. Then, at the park, Chuck approaches the hot dog vendor, who holds up a hot dog for him. Elsewhere in the park, another man holds up a sub sandwich for him.)

Narrator: Later that night, at Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy’s evil sandwich-making lair...

(He is in the basement of his mother’s house, looking at himself in the mirror.)

Chuck: What’s the matter with people? I’m evil! I walk outside on a hot day without shoes! I walk right on the hot cement like ten seconds before I hop onto the grass! Oh, and sometimes I use hand soap to wash my FACE! I’m out of control! And if people want a sandwich crime, I’ll GIVE them the sandwich crime of the century!

Chuck’s Mom: (from above) Chucky, can you bring up some more beets?

Chuck: Mom, I’m having a moment!

Chuck’s Mom: Charles!

Chuck: Yes, ma.

Chuck’s Mom: Thank you, pumpkin!

Narrator: Later, across town…

(Scene: The Botsford house. Becky and Bob are looking at their map in front of the living room couch.)

Becky: I can’t believe that Chuck’s gotten away from us twice! We have to figure out where he’s going to commit his next crime. (Huggy points to the upper right of the map.) He’s not going to rob the ocean! How do you even rob the ocean?!

(Mr. Botsford walks over, and Bob quickly shoves the entire map in his mouth.)

Mr. Botsford: Well, our family  tradition  is all done! Beans ala Botsford! (Sets the pan down on the table.) Who wants the first bite?

Becky: (holding her nose) Is it part of the  tradition  to hold your nose?

Mr. Botsford: Oh, come on! It smells worse than it tastes! (He shoves a spoonful in his mouth, then drops the spoon and his eye starts twitching.) Oh! Oh, my. I’m a little nauseous! Ex-cuse me! (runs off)

Becky: I don’t know how anyone could put those disgusting beans in there-- Bob? (Bob has decided that it tastes good to him, and is gobbling it down from the pan.)

(Outside the front window, a car pulls up across the street from their house. Exposition Guy comes out of the car, and runs toward the house across the street.)

Exposition Guy: He-e-elp! Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy is robbing the grocery store!

Woman in window: Oh, that’s terrible! But why are you telling me?

Exposition Guy: Isn’t this the police station?

Woman in window: No. This is your house. I’m your wife.

Exposition Guy: I thought you looked familiar! Where’s the police station?

Woman in window: Next street over!

Exposition Guy: Oh. Thanks, sweetie. He-e-e-elp!

Woman in window: Hey! Bring home some eggs!

Becky: Come on, Bob! We have to go stop Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy once and for all! Word UP! (Bob is still sitting on the couch eating Beans ala Botsford.) Put those down!

(Scene: The grocery store.)

Narrator: Meanwhile, at the grocery store, Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy is robbing the-- well, the grocery store!

Chuck: Listen up! I’m Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy, and sandwiches are what I’m about-- SANDWICHES, got it? Tell your friends! (to manager) Now YOU, give me all your bread!

Grocery Store Manager: Bread? Sure, no problem! We’ve got bread! Why, we’ve got the finest selection of breads in the whole city! You want white? We’ve got white! You want wheat?

Chuck: Uh, I hadn’t really--

Grocery Store Manager: We’ve got wheat! You want pumpernickel?

Chuck: I guess…

Grocery Store Manager: We’re fresh out of pumpernickel. How about some rye?

Chuck: Stop! Listen pal, I just want a regular old loaf of bread, and I want it NOW! I’m a meddlesome crook,you know.

WordGirl: That’s why you’re going to prison!

Chuck: Who’s going to put me in prison? You? I’ve gotten away from you twice, and I’ll do it again! Piece of cake! Or should I say, piece of BREAD?

WordGirl: Clever, Chuck! But you’re not clever enough to once again escape the unstoppable duo of WordGirl and Captain Huggy Fa-- (He is still eating Beans ala Botsford.) Did you HAVE to bring those? There’s not gonna go bad, just put them in the refrigerator! Eww…

(Meanwhile, Chuck scoops up WordGirl and Huggy with a forklift-type of machine with a basket, and dumps them into a large bread maker.)

WordGirl: What is this thing?

Chuck: This is my Evil Breadmaker of Doom!

Narrator: Catchy name!

Chuck: Now, WordGirl, you’re about to finally meet the end of a giant loaf of bread! (The machine starts working, and after a few seconds a bell rings, and a giant loaf of bread emerges.) Voila! WordGirl and that weird monkey guy are now encased in a giant loaf of pumpernickel bread! How’s that for a sandwich crime, huh? Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Grocery Store Manager: Say, I can’t hear a peep. I think they’re done for!

Chuck: Yes! I did it!

Narrator: Is this the end of WordGirl and Captain Huggy Face? Has Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy actually become menacing? Will the smell of Beans ala Botsford ever come out of my clothes?

Chuck: Okay, listen up! I want all those breads you talked about before and the croutons too, and-and English muffins-- NOW! Heh-heh-heh-hee!

(A large, continuous belching sound starts coming from the huge loaf of bread.)

Chuck: What was that? Please tell me that’s an earthquake!

(Pieces of bread go flying, and WordGirl and Huggy are standing in the middle of what used to be the loaf.)

WordGirl: Well well, Chuck, it looks like it’s true what they say-- the bean IS mightier than the sandwich!

Narrator: Who says that?

Chuck: Oh…

WordGirl: Now, Chuck, I think it’s time you CHECK OUT of this crime spree! (Everyone looks confused) Get it? Check out of this crime spree?

Narrator: Oh, we got it!

WordGirl: NOW, Huggy!

Chuck: Oh, come on! (Huggy jumps off the counter and pulls a large paper bag over Chuck. WordGirl then puts him onto the check-out conveyor belt, and he ends up in a shopping cart.)

Narrator: So, once again, WordGirl and Captain Huggy Face risk life and a pot of beans to stop the evil and not-so-menacing Chuck the Evil Sandwich-Making Guy from stealing-- wait, I’m confused… what was he stealing again?

(The Grocery Store Manager hands her a receipt)

WordGirl: Thirteen dollars dollars in baked goods and fresh produce.

Chuck: Really? Was that all I had?

WordGirl: Yep.

Chuck: Wow!

WordGirl: Totally not worth it.

Narrator: No, not at all. (The police arrive and wheel him away.)

Chuck: Someone should have said something, I don’t think I would have done all that.

Narrator: Join us again next time on another fabulous episode of-- WordGirl!