The Fright Before Creepmas

1 [Thundering] [Music] [Screaming] Ah, welcome to Creepmas at my monster hotel. I'm your host, Dracula, as I'm sure you can tell. But this holiday tale is not about me. I'm stuck at vampire council, missing Mavy-wavy. And right now, it appears a scary yarn's being spun because a fright before Creepmas is all part of the fun. [Teeth chattering] MAVIS: And he only comes when you're dead asleep. Driving slowly down your street. [Making brakes screeching sound] Then, just when things couldn't possibly get any more terrifying, Krampus pulls out his cannon and blasts presents under the tree! I love Creepmas! Dude, Krampus is the perfect Creepmas monster super scary, but he brings presents, so he's super cool, too! You did great taking over for your dad, telling the Krampus story this year, Mavis. - He'd be totally proud. - Thanks, Wendy. But without Dad here, Creepmas is sort of bitter-sweet. Don't worry, Mavis. We're gonna party so hardy, you won't even notice Drac isn't here. [Chuckles] Uh, about that You know how Aunt Lydia feels about decorations and Creepmas and pretty much fun in general. Oh, come on. Fine. But we've got to be inconspicuous. Low-key is my specialty. DRACULA: So, the gang set to work on a Creepmas display, but it turned out "low-key" was not Pedro's forte. [Crashing] And with only a handful of trimmings in place, Aunt Lydia arrived with a scowl on her face. What is the meaning of this? Aunt Lydia! Hi! So glad you're here! We thought, since there's only one night 'til Creepmas, it'd be cool to put up just a few decorations? Bah humbug. [Humming] [Roaring] But, Aunt Lydia, every year, Dad and I go crazy decorating and baking and AUNT LYDIA: I realize your father is something of a Creepmas enthusiast. But I am in charge this year, and if I see even one more hint - of Creepmas in this hotel - Uh-oh! [Screaming] [Growling] Aunt Lydia, no! The missile toes! [Growling] That's it. Creepmas is cancelled! Um, Scary Creepmas? DRACULA: And though she'd seen it each year, now Mavis wanted a reason to explain her Aunt's loathing of the whole Creepmas season. What kind of monster thinks she can just cancel Creepmas? This stinks! It's sad to see, really. When she was little, Lydia used to love Creepmas more than any monster. Yeah, that makes sense. She used to wait, what?! You're saying my Aunt Lydia The Dark Baroness loved Creepmas? MALE VOICE ON TV: Danger, danger. [Pac-Man death noise sounding] Woo-hoo! Aw, come on! I wasn't looking! [Laughing] Exactly! Thanks for the early Creepmas present, Mavis! Uncle Gene, are you serious? Sure, I'm serious! Lydia was kooky for Creepmas! She worshipped Krampus! Once, she even visited him! Most monsters, of course, are too afraid to actually meet Krampus, writing letters instead, so he knows what to fire under the tree. Only the most die-hard Creepmas fans dare make the long, dangerous trip through the underworld to deliver their wishes in person, and then be bowled down Krampus Mountain, as is tradition. When it was Lydia's turn, her terrifying trip became worth it. The highlight of her young, 40-year-old afterlife was when she asked for the only toy she'd ever wanted My First Mace. She even gave Krampus a picture, so he wouldn't get confused. But then, Lydia noticed something was off. Instead of bowling her out like the other kids, Krampus just smiled and sent Lydia on her way. And so, that Creepmas night, Lydia crept out of her coffin to see what Krampus had shot under the tree. Lydia found a shiny jingle bell! It was the first and last Creepmas gift your Aunt ever asked for. That is the saddest thing ever! No wonder she doesn't like Creepmas! But it does give me an idea. You guys thinking what I'm thinking? Uh, that we should be thankful we're dead to enjoy Creepmas at all and not meddle in Lydia's affairs? Exactly! We gotta go see Krampus so we can tell him how he totally blew it with Aunt Lydia's only Creepmas wish and demand a My First Mace! Yeah, I'm afraid I'm out. That is way above my pay grade. I'm out, too. My folks just got here - and they didn't pack for a funeral. - Well, I, for one, am in. Mavis is my best friend, and if she needs help saving Creepmas, - then I'm there for her. - Thank you, Wendy. Right. And just out of curiosity, you are familiar with the part of the Krampus legend concerning what happens if you try to see him - outside of official visiting hours? - Ha-ha! Hank! Come on! This is about more than a toy! It's about songs and decorations and roast serpent dinner! It's about saving Creepmas for Aunt Lydia and the whole hotel! You know Fifi the Zombie Clown? Before she visited Krampus, she was Fifi the Perfectly Normal Paralegal. But now [Bell ringing] [Screaming] I think I hear Daddy. Yep, he's yelling that he wants to go goo-bogganing, so I better just bounce to it. But ya know, I wish you luck, Mavis, and I think you're gonna do great! Fine! I'll just go see Krampus myself then! DRACULA: With her friends showing a distinct lack of backbone, Mavis set out to save Creepmas all on her own. She flew like a flash across the underworld, past places that would make your hair start to curl. But it wasn't until Mavis saw Krampus' cave that she questioned if her voyage was foolish or brave. Um hello? Is anyone there? [Growling] - Who goes there? - [Gulping] It's Mavis? [Groaning] Visiting hours ended last week! I know. And I'm really, really, really, really sorry, but this is a Creepmas emergency. - [Sighing angrily] It always is. - Right, right. Sorry. I just I just need to ask about an oversight made on a gift for my Aunt, back in the late 800s? An oversight? Listen Um Mavis was it? - I appreciate your attention to detail. - Oh, well, it's my pleasure. But Krampus doesn't make mistakes! - My Aunt is Lydia Dracula! - Lydia? Well, well, well why didn't you say so? I remember exactly the Creepmas gift you're talking about. It was no mistake. She was never supposed to get that present. And as far as I can tell, everything worked out perfectly. - But - No buts! I've gotta catch at least a little shut-eye before my trip, so I recommend you fly back the way you came and forget about that mace. You know, unless you wanna end up as fish food - in Lake Rashy Skin? - [Gulping] No, I'm good! Okay! I guess we're done here! Scary Creepmas. [Yawning, snoring] DRACULA: So, about to head home, tears wetting her face, Mavis looked back one last time at Lydia's mace. Then, she got an idea full of peril and risk. but to possibly work, she'd have to be brisk. Wait, stop! Mavy, don't do it! No! What? She can't hear me? What's the point of narration if you can't influence the story? Okay, where was I? Right, right. Though Krampus claimed he'd made no mistake, Mavis frantically reasoned it didn't mean she couldn't still salvage the season! - Scary Creepmas, everybody! - Pour me another, Frankie, baby. Good thing Lydia's not here! Uh, would you believe me if I said aliens made me do it? [Chuckling] That's my mamma. [Clucking] Actually, we were just talking about how relieved we are to not have any Creepmas fun. - Uh, really takes the pressure off. - I see. Well, as long as you're not enjoying yourselves. [All sighing with relief] - Mavis! - You're alive! Meet me on the roof. [Panting] Five minutes. - So, we gotta go. - Creepmas stuff. Nothing to worry about! Bye, Mamma! [Gasping] Creepmas is saved! [Wendy gasping] - PEDRO: The mace! - Nice! Now, go give it to her, so Creepmas can start for real! - Uh, I can't just give it to her. - What? Why not? Aunt Lydia could have tracked that toy down at any point over the last 1200 years, but she didn't. It has to be fired by a cannon under the Bone Tree, - so she knows it's from Krampus! - Oh! So, that's why I ran up all those stairs with this thing jabbing me in the ribs! WENDY: You put up a Bone Tree in the lobby? - Lydia's gonna freak! - Don't think so, Wendy. Because when she lays her eyes on the only gift she's ever wanted, this Creepmas embargo will finally be over! Whoa! AUNT LYDIA: Mavis! What was that? [Scoffing] Creepmas carolers. - [Spitting] Huh, got 'em. - Oh. Well, good. [All sighing with relief] Carrying boxes inside, yes, you are What a big strong guy, he's so strong KITTY: Donald, we still need to wrap those. Hurry up! [Yelping] Coming! [All gasping] Oh, skull snaps. We have to get the mace back or we're staked 2 and it's bye-bye Creepmas! Luckily, they're probably asleep, so we can zip in and out. But how are we supposed to get in? Don't the humans have some hi-tech monster security system? Please! They haven't designed a system that can stop the P-e-dro! Hah! [Laser zapping] All right, scratch that. [Groaning] Of all the houses for the mace to be in, it would have to be the one belonging to the world's pre-eminent monster hater. [Groaning] [Bells jingling] - Um do you hear that? - A burglar! What kind of monster breaks into a human house on Creepmas night? - I mean, you know, besides us? - I don't know. - WENDY: What? - HANK: Whoa! Whoever it is, he just showed us the way inside! The chimney must not be protected! DRACULA: And so, encouraged by witnessing this Creepmas crime spree, the kids flew up toward the Cartwrights' chimney. [Yelping] [Krampus snoring] Krampus was waking and, uh well, scratching his bum [Heavy metal playing] to some heavy metal music that would melt your ear drums. Yeah! [Coughing] Okay. Naughty list? Check. Sack of unsafe toys? Check. Now let's kick some Creepmas butt! DRACULA: But just about to leave, something felt out of place, he realized quickly it was Lydia's mace! Okay, Mavis Dracula, you want games? Let's play! [Roaring] DRACULA: Meanwhile, back at the Cartwrights, Hank proved outstanding at giving the others a much softer landing. [Gasping] [Screaming] I think I'm gonna be sick. Oh, no. Everything's wrapped! It could be in any of these packages! The quicker we find it, the quicker we get out of this shiny nightmare. Hah! I wuv you! [Screaming] Die, foul beast! Ah! Ah! Ah! You! If he wakes the humans, the mission is blown! [Snoring] PEDRO: Let me go! Let at it! Let me go! Santa?! I said, let me go! I'm right here! - Come at me, bro! - Okay. It's okay. He can't hurt you anymore. All right, guys, we gotta be brave and just power through. [Ticking] [All panting] Let us never speak of this again. Mmm Ooh! Gotta admit though, these fancy spiral meat hooks are sorta tasty. [Gasping] No! [Screaming] We still haven't found the mace! And look at this mess! We can't leave the place like this. Look at all the claw marks and blob stains! This has monster invasion written all over it. But how are we gonna put the gifts back together? The paper's trashed! [Scoffing] Step aside, skin-wearers, and let the wrap king do his thing! Aight, drop me a sick beat. [Rap beat playing] Once again, it's every wrapper's Favorite time of the year When all them gifts need to be covered with a shiny veneer No, at Creepmas, all that wrappin' Isn't just window dressin' Ya gotta keep all them bad Little boys and ghouls guessin' 'Cause trust me, ain't nobody wanna open they swag If it's only in a ribbon or a box or a bag No, the only thing that's good enough for my Creepmas night Is a whole buncha wrappin' and it better be tight! [Little girl giggling] Look! [Gasping] She's got the mace! [Giggling] How will we get it back now? [Gasping] [Giggling] Ah, guess we can kiss Creepmas goodbye. [Sighing] You should go. At least you guys have family to hang with this year. - Hold on. I might have an idea. - What? - Well, that was easy. - Maybe for you! I just got that leg for my birthday. [Giggling] There! Good as new. MAVIS: We're gonna make it! It's not too late to save Creepmas! Well, what do you know ALL: Krampus! I'm sorry, Mr. Krampus, but I had to take the mace. And anyway, I'm not the one that made the mistake in the first place. But Krampus doesn't make mistakes! Give me the mace! [Gulping] - Well? - Uh, I'll probably regret this, but the answer is no. I suppose there's only one thing to do now, then. [Growling] I suppose so. Hank? Leg. [Groaning] Ooh! Creepmas fight! [Music] [Both growling] What is going on here!? Yeah, what's going out here?! Oh my goblins, it's Krampus. [Sighing] It's all my fault. I learned how Krampus forgot to bring you a My First Mace when you were little. And I thought if I could make it right, maybe your Creepmas spirit would come back, then we could celebrate like we do - when Dad is here and - Whoa, whoa, whoa! You still think I didn't bring that mace 'cause I made a mistake at the job I've been doing since the beginning of time? Y-Y-Y es? [Laughing] Kid, the reason I didn't bring Lydia that toy was to help her be the most terrifying monster in history! You did what now? DRACULA: So, Krampus explained, in dramatic flashback, how he helped turn Lydia's kind heart jet black. Making Lydia mad was all part of the plan and that's when her afterlife truly began. So, you were actually helping Lydia - by not giving her what she wanted? - Exactly! If I gave her that toy, she would have drifted through afterlife a friendly, soft little wimp, instead of becoming the terrifying beast she is today! Mind blown. [Making explosion noise] That night, Krampus gave me the greatest gift of all pure evil. - I-I don't know what to say. - How about that you'll give my daughter back her present and apologize for [yells] trashing my house?! - Humans! - Yes, humans! You know, the ones whose house you destroyed, gifts you defaced, [whimpers] and toy you replaced with - this disgusting appendage. - Well, clearly, you don't appreciate a good leg when you see one. Well, unless you want to add being incinerated to your list of grievances, I suggest that you Please, allow me. [Giggling] My dear, please enjoy with our deepest regrets. - I-I um, thank you. - Okay, hon, let's leave all of these nice monsters alone and go enjoy the rest of our holidays with all of our blood still in our bodies. KITTY: What is happening? - How dare you! - Wait for it. [Both screaming, little girl giggling] It's so beautiful. [Laughing] Scary Creepmas, everyone! [Organ playing tune of "Hark the Herald Angels Sing"] Barks and peril, painful stings Gory goo and demon wings Greasy barf and steaming bile Ate my dinner, werewolf style - # La la la la la la laa # - DRACULA: As their scary song filled the air with delight, Mavis slowly retreated back into the night. Although she'd accomplished an incredible feat, for her, Creepmas night still wasn't complete. Sure, everyone was happy as mutant clams, but deep down, Mavis still missed her old man. She knew that a visit was a strict no-go. [Tapping] And yet was that tapping on her bedroom window? Dad! [Both laughing] Scary Creepmas, my little Mavy-wavy! I can't believe you're here! To be honest, I can't believe it either. If the council knew, they'd pull out my fangs and use them for arm-on-the-cob holders. But I just missed you too much. Unfortunately, I didn't have a chance to get you a Creepmas gift! Yes, you did. DRACULA: With Creepmas now saved for my Mavy too, I knew it was time, I was right on cue, to fly like a bat out into the night, yelling scary Creepmas to all and to all a good fright! [Laughs] Scary Creepmas, Dad.