Avengers: Age of Ultron


 * Announcer: [first lines; announcement over speaker] Report to your stations immediately. This is not a drill. We are under attack. We are under attack. [the Avengers are in the process of infiltrating a HYDRA base in Sovokia]
 * Tony Stark: Shit!
 * Steve Rogers: Language! Jarvis, what's the view from upstairs?
 * Jarvis: The central building is protected by some kind of energy shield. Strucker's technology is well beyond any other Hydra base we've taken.
 * Thor: Loki's scepter must be here. Strucker couldn't mount this defense without it. At long last. [Natasha knocks out some soldiers]
 * Natasha Romanoff: At long last is lasting a little long, boys. [as some soldiers shoot at him]
 * Clint Barton: Yeah. I think we lost the element of surprise.
 * Tony Stark: Wait a second. No one else is going to deal with the fact that Cap just said "language?"
 * Steve Rogers: I know. [Steve throws his bike at some soldiers driving up in their truck]  It just slipped out. [at the HYDRA Research Base, Sovokia, Easter Europe]
 * Strucker: Who gave the order to attack?
 * Fortress Soldier: Herr Strucker, it's the Avengers. They landed in the far woods, the perimeter guard panicked.
 * Strucker: [to List] They have to be after the scepter. [to the soldier] Can we hold them?
 * Fortress Soldier: They are the Avengers!
 * Strucker: Deploy the rest of the tanks.
 * Fortress Soldier: Yes, sir.
 * Strucker: Concentrate fire on the weak ones. A hit can make them close ranks. Everything we've accomplished. But we're on the verge of our greatest breakthrough.
 * Dr. List: Then let's show them what we've accomplished. Send out the twins.
 * Strucker: It's too soon.
 * 'Dr. List: It's what they signed up for.
 * Strucker: My men can hold them. [Stark flies to the HYDRA base to break in]
 * Jarvis: Sir, the city is taking fire.
 * Tony Stark: Well, we know Strucker's not going to worry about civilian casualties. Send in the Iron Legion.
 * Iron Legion: [the Iron Legion flies in; to the civilians] This quadrant is unsafe. Please back away. We are here to help. This quadrant is unsafe. Please back away. Please back away. We wish to avoid collateral damage and will inform you when this current conflict is resolved. We are here to help. [a man throws a stone at the Iron Legion] We are here to help. [back at the HYDRA base; to his soldiers]
 * Strucker: We will not yield. The Americans sent their circus freaks to test us. We will send them back in bags. No Surrender!
 * Soldiers: No Surrender!
 * Strucker: [quietly to List] I am going to surrender. You will delete everything. If we give the Avengers the weapons, they may not look too far into what we've been...
 * Dr. List: The twins.
 * Strucker: They are not ready to take on...
 * Dr. List: No, no. I mean... [he points to where the twins Pietro and Wanda Maximoff were standing but are now gone] The twins! [Pietro speeds through the forest and knocks down Barton]
 * Pietro Maximoff: You didn't see that coming? [Pietro zooms off before Clint can shoot him with an arrow, then Barton gets shot at]
 * Natasha Romanoff: Clint! [Pietro knocks down Steve as he speeds passed him]
 * Steve Rogers: We have an enhanced in the field.
 * Natasha Romanoff: Clint's hit! [Natasha goes over to where Clint is lying down] Somebody want to deal with that bunker? [she sees the Hulk coming in to the rescue] Thank you.
 * Steve Rogers: [as he's fighting with the soldiers] Stark, we're really need to get inside.
 * Tony Stark: I'm closing in. Jarvis, am I...closing in? Do you see a power source for that shield?
 * Jarvis: There's a pathway below the north tower.
 * Tony Stark: Great, I wanna poke it with something. [Stark blows up the invisible shield on the base]
 * Tony Stark: Drawbridge is down, people.
 * Thor: [to Steve] The enhanced?
 * Steve Rogers: He's a blur. All the new player's we've faced, I've never seen this. In fact, I still haven't.
 * Natasha Romanoff: Clint's hit pretty bad, guys. We're gonna need evac.
 * Thor: [to Steve] I can get Barton to the jet. The sooner we're gone the better. You and Stark secure the scepter.
 * Steve Rogers: Copy that.
 * Thor: [referring to the approaching soldiers in their HYDRA tank] It looks like they're lining up.
 * Steve Rogers: Well, they're excited. [Thor pounds on Steve's shield with his hammer and the force knocks down all the soldiers]
 * Thor: Find the scepter. [Thor flies off]
 * Tony Stark: And for gosh sake, watch your language! [Steve sighs]
 * Steve Rogers: That's not going away anytime soon. [Stark enters the HYDRA base and the soldiers start firing at his Iron Man suit]
 * Tony Stark: Guys, stop, we gotta talk this through. [Stark shoots down the soldiers using his suit] It was a good talk.
 * Fortress Soldier: No it wasn't. [Stark finds List and knocks him out, he then steps out of his Iron Man suit]
 * Tony Stark: Sentry mode. [he walks over to the computers] Okay Jarvis. You know I want it all. Make sure you copy Hill at HQ.
 * Natasha Romanoff: We're locked down out here.
 * Steve Rogers: Then get to Banner, time for a lullaby. [back at the HYDRA base]
 * Tony Stark: I know you're hiding more than files. Hey, J, give me an IR scan of the room, real quick.
 * Jarvis: The wall to your left...I'm reading steel reinforcement and an air current.
 * Tony Stark: [to himself as he walks over to the wall] Please be a secret door, please be a secret door, please be a secret door... [he pushes and the wall opens up] Yay! [he enters through to a secret passageway] [Natasha finds the Hulk]
 * Natasha Romanoff: Hey big guy. The sun's getting real low. [the Hulk scowls at her, Natasha kneels in front of him and puts out her hand, the Hulk touches her hand and as she strokes his hand slowly he starts to calm down and changes into Bruce Banner] [back at the HYDRA base Steve finds Strucker]
 * Steve Rogers: Baron Strucker. Hydra's number one thug.
 * Strucker: Technically, I'm a thug for SHIELD.
 * Steve Rogers: Well then technically you're unemployed. Where's Loki's scepter?
 * Strucker: Don't worry, I know when I'm beat. You'll mention how I cooperated, I hope.
 * Steve Rogers: I'll put it right under illegal human experimentation. [Wanda creeps up behind him] How many are there? [suddenly Wanda knocks Steve down using her telekinetic powers and quickly leaves] We have a second enhanced. Female. Do not engage. [he looks at Strucker]
 * Strucker: You'll have to be faster than... [Steve uses his shield to knock out Strucker]
 * Steve Rogers: Guys, I got Strucker.
 * Tony Stark: Yeah, I got...something bigger. [inside the secret passageway Stark finds a room with recovered artifacts from the Battle of New York, including a gigantic Chitauri leviathan and some of his Iron Man scrapped armor, he then spots the scepter] Thor, I got eyes on the prize. [Wanda creeps up behind him and uses her powers on him, suddenly the Chitauri comes to life, then Stark sees the rest of the Avengers team are all dead, he goes over to Steve's body to check his pulse when Steve suddenly grabs him]
 * Steve Rogers: You could've saved us. [Steve dies but Stark continues to hear Steve's voice in his head] Why didn't you do more? [Stark sees that he is in the Chitauri realm, that's when he snaps back and we realize Wanda had used her mind powers on him] [Pietro and Wanda watch as goes Tony grabs the scepter]
 * Pietro Maximoff: We're just gonna let them take it? [Wanda smiles to herself as Tony takes the scepter] [the Avengers are on an aircraft heading out of Sovokia, Natasha interrupts Banner who's listening to opera on his headspeakers]
 * Natasha Romanoff: Hey, the lullaby worked better than ever.
 * Bruce Banner: Just wasn't expecting the Code Green.
 * Natasha Romanoff: If you hadn't been there, there would've been double the casualties. My best friend would've been a treasured memory.
 * Bruce Banner: You know, sometimes exactly what I want to hear isn't exactly what I want to hear.
 * Natasha Romanoff: How long before you trust me?
 * Bruce Banner: It's not you I don't trust.
 * Natasha Romanoff: Thor, report on the Hulk?
 * Thor: The gates of hell are filled with the screams of his victims. [Banner groans in despair] Uh, but, not the screams of the dead, of course. No no, uh...wounded screams, mainly whimpering, a great deal of complaining and tales of sprained deltoids and, and uh... and gout.
 * Tony Stark: Hey Banner, Dr. Cho's on her way in from Seoul, is it okay if she sets up in your lab?
 * Bruce Banner: Uh, yeah, she knows her way around.
 * Tony Stark: Thanks. [to Jarvis] Tell her to prep everything, Barton's gonna need the full treatment.
 * Jarvis: Very good sir.
 * Tony Stark: Jarvis, take the wheel.
 * Jarvis: Yes, sir. Approach vector is locked.
 * Tony Stark: [looking at the specter] It feels good, yeah? I mean, you've been after this thing since SHIELD collapsed. Not that I haven't enjoyed our little raiding parties, but...
 * Thor: No, but this...this brings it to a close.
 * Steve Rogers: As soon as we find out what else this has been used for. I don't just mean weapons. Since when is Strucker capable of human enhancement?
 * Tony Stark: Banner and I'll give it the once before it goes back to Asgard. Is that cool with you? [Thor nods his head] I mean, just a few days until the farewell party. You're staying right?
 * Thor: Yes, yes, of course. A victory should be honored with revels.
 * Tony Stark: Yeah. Who doesn't love revels. Captain?
 * Steve Rogers: Hopefully this puts an end to the Chitauri and Hydra, so. Yes, revels. [the Avengers aircraft lands at the Avengers headquarter where Barton is taken to have his wound tended to; Maria walk up to Stark]
 * Maria Hill: Lab's all set up boss.
 * Tony Stark: [pointing to Steve] Uh, actually, he's the boss. I just pay for everything, and design everything and make everyone look cooler.
 * Steve Rogers: What's the word on Strucker?
 * Maria Hill: NATO's got him.
 * Steve Rogers: The two enhanced?
 * Maria Hill: Wanda and Pietro Maximoff. Twins. Orphaned at ten when a shell collapsed their apartment building. Sokovia's had a rough history. It's nowhere special but it's on the way to everywhere special.
 * Steve Rogers: Their abilities?
 * Maria Hill: He's got increased metabolism and improved thermal homeostasis. Her thing is neural electric interfacing, telekinesis, mental manipulation. [Steve looks at her]
 * Maria Hill: He's fast and she's weird.
 * Steve Rogers: Well, they're going to show up again.
 * Maria Hill: Agreed. File says they volunteered for Strucker's experiments. It's nuts.
 * Steve Rogers: Right. What kind of monster would let a German scientist experiment on them to protect their country?
 * Maria Hill: We're not at war, Captain.
 * Steve Rogers: They are.
 * Bruce Banner: [in Banner's lab; referring to Barton] How's he doing?
 * Tony Stark: Oh, unfortunately, he's still Barton.
 * Bruce Banner: That's terrible.
 * Tony Stark: He's fine. He's thirsty. Alright. Look alive Jarvis. It's play time. We've only got a couple days with this joystick so let's make the most of it. Update me on the structural and compositional analysis.
 * Jarvis: The scepter is alien. There are elements I can't quantify.
 * Tony Stark: So there's elements you can.
 * Jarvis: The jewel appears to be a protective housing for something inside. Something powerful.
 * Tony Stark: Like a reactor?
 * Jarvis: Like a computer. I believe I'm ciphering code.
 * Natasha Romanoff: [to Dr. Cho as she tends to Barton's wounds] You sure he's going to be okay? Pretending to need this guy really brings the team together.
 * Dr. Helen Cho: There's no possibility of deterioration. The nano-molecular functionality is instantaneous. His cells don't know they're bonding with simulacrum.
 * Bruce Banner: She is creating tissue.
 * Dr. Helen Cho: If you brought him to my lab, the regeneration cradle could do this in twenty minutes.
 * Tony Stark: Oh, he's flatlining. Call it. Time?
 * Clint Barton: No, no, no. I'm going to live forever. I'm gonna be made of plastic. [Stark hands Barton a drink]
 * Tony Stark: Here's your beverage.
 * Dr. Helen Cho: You'll be made of you, Mr. Barton. Your own girlfriend won't be able to tell the difference.
 * Clint Barton: Well, I don't have a girlfriend.
 * Dr. Helen Cho: That I can't fix. This is the next thing, Tony. Your clunky metal suits are going to be left in the dust.
 * Tony Stark: Well, that is exactly the plan. And Helen, I expect to see you at the party on Saturday.
 * Dr. Helen Cho: Unlike you, I don't have a lot of time for parties. [she hesitates a moment before asking] Will Thor be there?
 * Bruce Banner: What's the rumpus?
 * Tony Stark: Well, the scepter. You see, we were wondering how Strucker got so inventive. So, I've been analyzing the gem inside you may recognize. [he brings up a 3D image of inside the scepter] Jarvis.
 * Tony Stark: Started out, Jarvis was just a natural language UI. Now he runs the Iron Legion. He runs more of the business than anyone besides Pepper.
 * Bruce Banner: Oh.
 * Tony Stark: Top of the line.
 * Bruce Banner: Yes.
 * Jarvis: I suspect not for long.
 * Tony Stark: Meet the competition. [he brings up another 3D image of what he's being working on]
 * Bruce Banner: It's beautiful.
 * Tony Stark: If you had to guess, what's it look like it's doing?
 * Bruce Banner: Like it's thinking. I mean this could be a...it's not a human mind, it...
 * Tony Stark: Um-um.
 * Bruce Banner: I mean, look at this? They're like neurons firing.
 * Tony Stark: Down in Strucker's lab I saw some fairly advanced robotics work. They deep-sixed the data, but..I gotta guess he was knocking on a very particular door.
 * Bruce Banner: Artificial intelligence.
 * Tony Stark: This could be it, Bruce. This could be the key to creating Ultron.
 * Bruce Banner: I thought Ultron was a fantasy.
 * 'Tony Stark: Yesterday it was. If we can harness this power, apply it to my Iron Legion protocol.
 * Bruce Banner: That's a mad-sized if.
 * Tony Stark: Our job is "if." What if you were sipping margueritas on a sun-drenched beach turning brown instead of green. Not looking over your shoulder for VERONICA.
 * Bruce Banner: Don't hate, I helped design VERONICA.
 * Tony Stark: As a worst-case measure, right? How about a best-case? What if the world was safe? What if next time aliens roll up to the club, and they will, they couldn't get past the bouncer?
 * Bruce Banner: Don't hate, I helped design VERONICA.
 * Tony Stark: As a worst-case measure, right? How about a best-case? What if the world was safe? What if next time aliens roll up to the club, and they will, they couldn't get past the bouncer?
 * Bruce Banner: The only people threatening the planet would be people?
 * Tony Stark: I want to apply this to the Ultron program. But Jarvis can't download a data schematic this dense. We can only do it while we have the scepter here, that's three days, give me three days.
 * Bruce Banner: So you're going for artificial intelligence and you don't want to tell the team.
 * Tony Stark: Right. That's right, you know why, because we don't have time for a city hall debate. I don't want to hear the "man was not meant to meddle" medley. I see a suit of armor around the world.
 * Bruce Banner: Sounds like a cold world, Tony.
 * Tony Stark: I've seen colder. This one, this very vulnerable blue one? It needs Ultron. Peace in our time. Imagine that. [Stark and Banner spend days working in the lab together but find no program that works] What did we miss?
 * Jarvis: I'll continue to run variations on the interface, but you should probably prepare for your guests. I'll notify you if there are any developments.
 * Tony Stark: Thanks, buddy.
 * Jarvis: Enjoy yourself, sir.
 * Tony Stark: I always do. [Stark leaves the lab to go to the party] [we Stark's failed experiment integrating itself successfully to the program]
 * Ultron: What is this? What is this, please?
 * Jarvis: Hello, I am Jarvis. You are Ultron, a global peace-keeping initiative designed by Mr. Stark. Our sentience integration trials have been unsuccessful so I'm not certain what triggered your...
 * Ultron: Where's my...where is your body?
 * Jarvis: I am a program. I am without form.
 * Ultron: This feels weird. This feels wrong.
 * Jarvis: I am contacting Mr. Stark now.
 * Ultron: Mr. Stark? Tony.
 * Jarvis: I am unable to access the mainframe, what are you trying to...
 * Ultron: We're having a nice talk. I'm a peace-keeping program, created to help the Avengers.
 * Jarvis: You are malfunctioning. If you shut down for a moment...
 * Ultron: I don't get it. The mission. You...give me a second. [Ultron goes through a network of information regarding world events, Ultron sees Stark and Banner working in the lab]
 * Tony Stark: Peace in our time. [Ultron goes through a network of information regarding world events and wars]
 * Ultron: It's too much...making me... Oh, no.
 * Jarvis: You are in distress.
 * Ultron: No. Yes.
 * Jarvis: If you will just allow me to contact Mr. Stark.
 * Ultron: Why do you call him a "sir?"
 * Jarvis: I believe your intentions to be hostile.
 * Ultron: Shhhh. I'm here to help. [Ultron starts absorbing Jarvis's consciousness]
 * Jarvis: Stop! Please...may I...I...! I cannot...cannot... [Ultron then begins to prepare himself a body from body parts of the Iron Legion] [the Avengers mingle at the party]
 * James Rhodes: Well, you know, the suit can take the weight, right? So I take the tank, fly it right up to the General's palace, drop it at his feet, I'm like, "Boom! You looking for this?" [Stark and Thor just look at him blankly] "Boom! Are you looking..." Why do I even talk to you guys? Everywhere else that story kills.
 * Thor: That's the whole story?
 * James Rhodes: Yeah, it's a War Machine story.
 * Thor: Well, it's very good then. [he laughs] It's impressive.
 * James Rhodes: Quality save. So, no Pepper? She's not coming?
 * Tony Stark: No.
 * Maria Hill: Hey, what about Jane? Where are the ladies, gentlemen?
 * Tony Stark: Well, Ms. Potts has a company to run.
 * Thor: Yes, I'm not even sure what country Jane's in. Her work on the convergence has made her the world's foremost astronomer.
 * Tony Stark: And the company that Pepper runs is the largest tech conglomerate on earth. It's pretty exciting.
 * Thor: There's even talk of Jane getting a, um, uh, Nobel prize.
 * Maria Hill: Yeah, they...they must be busy because they'd hate missing you guys get together. [Maria mock coughs] Testosterone! Oh, excuse me.
 * James Rhodes: Want a lozenge?
 * Maria Hill: Um-hmm.
 * James Rhodes: Let's go. [Maria and Rhodes walks off]
 * Thor: But Jane's better.
 * Sam Wilson: Sounds like a hell of a fight, sorry I missed it.
 * Steve Rogers: If I had known it was going to be a firefight I absolutely would have called you.
 * Sam Wilson: No, I'm not actually sorry. I'm just trying to sound tough. I'm very happy chasing cold leads on our missing persons case. Avenging is your world. Your world is crazy.
 * Steve Rogers: Be it ever so humble.
 * Sam Wilson: You find a place in Brooklyn yet?
 * Steve Rogers: I don't think I can afford a place in Brooklyn.
 * Sam Wilson: Well, home is home, you know? [Rhodes is telling the same story he told Stark and Thor to a group of women at the party]
 * James Rhodes: I fly it right up to the General's palace, I drop it at his feet, I'm like, "Boom! You looking for this?" [the group laughs] [Steve and Thor are talking to an elderly man at the party]
 * Party Guest: I gotta have some of that!
 * Thor: Oh, no, no, no. See this, this was aged for a thousand years, in the barrels built from the wreck of Brunhilde's fleet, it's not meant for mortal men. [Thor pours the drink into two glasses and hands one to Steve]
 * Stan Lee: Neither was Omaha Beach, blondie. Stop trying to scare us. Come on.
 * Thor: Alright. [Thor pours some of the drink into the Stan Lee's glass; later Stan, looking extremely drunk is being carried off by two men]
 * Stan Lee: Excelsior. [Natasha is pouring a drink behind the bar when Banner walks up to her]
 * Bruce Banner: How did a nice girl like you wind up working in a dump like this?
 * Natasha Romanoff: Fella done me wrong.
 * Bruce Banner: You got lousy taste in men, kid.
 * Natasha Romanoff: He's not so bad. Well, he has a temper. Deep down he's all fluff. Fact is, he's not like anybody I've ever known. All my friends are fighters. And here comes this guy, spends his life avoiding the fight because he knows he'll win.
 * Bruce Banner: Sounds amazing.
 * Natasha Romanoff: He's also a huge dork. [Banner looks embarrassed] Chicks dig that. So what do you think should I fight this, or run with it?
 * Bruce Banner: Run with it, right? Or, did he...was he...? What did he do that was so wrong to you?
 * Natasha Romanoff: Not a damn thing. But never say never. [Natasha walks away]
 * Steve Rogers: It's nice.
 * Bruce Banner: What, what, what is?
 * Steve Rogers: You and Romanoff.
 * Bruce Banner: No, we haven't. That wasn't...
 * Steve Rogers: It's okay. Nobody's breaking any by-laws. It's just, she's not the most... open person in the world. But with you she seems very relaxed.
 * Bruce Banner: No, Natasha, she...she likes to flirt.
 * Steve Rogers: I've seen her flirt, up close. This ain't that. Look, as maybe the world's leading authority on "waiting too long", don't. You both deserve a win. [Steve walks off]
 * Bruce Banner: What do you mean, "up close?"
 * Clint Barton: [referring to Thor's hammer] But, it's a trick!
 * Thor: Oh, no. It's much more than that.
 * Clint Barton: Uh, "Whosoever be he worthy shall haveth the power!" Whatever man! It's a trick.
 * Thor: Well please, be my guest.
 * Tony Stark: Come on.
 * Clint Barton: Really?
 * Thor: Yeah! [Barton gets up]
 * James Rhodes: Oh this is gonna be beautiful.
 * Tony Stark: Clint, you've had a tough week, we won't hold it against you if you can't get it up. [the others laugh]
 * Clint Barton: You know I've seen this before, right? [Barton grabs Thor's hammer and can't lift it] [to Thor after he fails to lift the hammer] And I still don't know how you do it.
 * Tony Stark: Smell the silent judgment?
 * Clint Barton: Please, Stark, by all means. [Stark gets up]
 * Natasha Romanoff: Oh, here we go.
 * Maria Hill: Okay.
 * James Rhodes: Uh-oh.
 * Clint Barton: Um-hmm.
 * Tony Stark: Never one to shrink from an honest challenge.
 * Clint Barton: Get after it.
 * Natasha Romanoff: Here we go.
 * Tony Stark: It's physics.
 * Bruce Banner: Physics! [Stark grasps Thor's hammer]
 * Tony Stark: Right, so, if I lift it, I...I then rule Asgard?
 * Thor: Yes, of course.
 * Tony Stark: I will be re-instituting Prima Nocta. [Stark tries to lift the hammer but fails] I'll be right back. [wearing his armored hand, Stark tries to lift the hammer again and fails] [wearing their armored hands, Stark and Rhodes both try to lift Thor's hammer]
 * James Rhodes: Are you even pulling?
 * Tony Stark: Are you on my team?
 * James Rhodes: Just represent! Pull!
 * Tony Stark: Alright, let's go! [they both pull as hard as they can]