Your Friend: Global Domination

Brain: (narrating) Bobby and Karen are 2 normal kids who live in a normal town, nd they have normal hopes and fears.

Pinky: (as Karen) Gosh, you have a keen bike, but I wonder about what kind of world we will live in in the future.

Brain: (narrating) said Karen. (as Bobby) Jeepers, I hope the future will be keen. (narrating) said Bobby. (as Bobby) But, do you think they can find a really smart guy to run the whole world? (Brain is then shown, introducing himself as a scientist.) Heh heh heh. Good questions, kids. Hello, I am the Brain, a genetically altered lab mouse who... will soon be... taking over the world. This is the world.

Narf!

And this is Pinky. You can tell the difference between them quite easily. One is a mass of inert matter hurtling blinding through the void. The other is the earth.

Which one am I again? Ha ha ha ha.

The one who'll soon have a large lump on his small head.

Oh. Narf!

Now, you might ask, "Brain, why do you want to take over the world?" [Clears throat]

[Whispers] Now? Ok. Brain, why do you want to take over the world?

Thank you, Pinky.

Don't mention it.

I won't.

Well, you can if you want to.

I don't want to! I'm glad you asked that spontaneous question, Which leads us to the purpose of our film: To inform our viewers as to why I want to take over the world And the beneficial changes they can expect when I do. So join me as we learn all about Brain: Let's look in on a typical suburban housewife.

Oh, how will I ever make carrot juice, clean my family's undergarments, and still have time to access the information super-road thingy. Narf!

Now, under the benevolent leadership of me, the Brain, science and industry combine to make life easier and more efficient With Brainco's stackable Compu-Juice-A-Matic.

Computer: you have mail.

Ooh, ha.

Better living through me. Unh. I will usher in a new era of peace and prosperity around the world. Here at the United Nations, we see how difficult it is for our world leaders To communicate today.

[Speaking French]

[Speaking Turkish]

Pitiful, isn't it? Under my global domination, The world population will be brought together By the establishment of a single language: Brainish. Observe the difference. [Speaks slowly] Pondering?

[Speaks slowly] Yes.

Yes.

Pondering.

Believe it or not, you have just witnessed a conversation about the weather, ancient Greek literature, and the filmography of tv's Norman Fell. Under my domination, The world of television will enter a new era of entertainment and economy as all programming will be under 30 seconds in length and limited to shows about me, the Brain.

Der-Ha ha ha huh huh huh!

What is the deal with world leadership? They don't really lead and they're not uh, ships. Who are these people? In a world dominated by me, the Brain, Classics of the silver screen Will be greatly enhanced, thanks to my innovations in computer imaging. The problems of 2 little mice don't amount to a hill of food pellets In this crazy, mixed-up world.

You have to think for the both of us, Brain.

You're getting on that plane, Pinky. If you don't, I'll have to hit you with this pencil. Maybe not now, but soon, And for the rest of your life.

We'll always have pellets.

In this Brain new world, vacationers will reap the benefits of my dominance; national monuments, European capitals, amusement parks.

He's only chasing me for my food. Ha ha ha ha. Narf!

And there will be ample opportunity To commune with nature. In my benevolence, I will allow 15 minutes per day of quiet time. Time for you. Time for you to meditate about me, the Brain. So you see, Global domination only sounds like a scary word. But, it's really only a way to make [Voice distorts] the world a better place to live.

Brain: Pinky, turn off the projector.

Aah!

Quickly, Pinky!

Aah. Unh. Oops. Sorry, Brain.

Wonderful. Now the reel is ruined. There goes my plan to distribute this film To every school assembly on earth.

Poit! It's still better than Congo or Anaconda.

Come, Pinky. We must prepare for tomorrow night.

Why, Brain? What we going to do tomorrow night?

The same thing we do every night, Pinky. [Voice distorts] Try to take over the world!

They're dinky, they're Pinky and the Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain.