How Aquaman Should Have Ended

Open with the Ocean Master leading his army to battle.

Ocean Master: Do you think this helmet makes me look stupid?

Guy: No. (snickers) You, (snickers) You look totally awesome.

A giant squid monster thing shows up.

Giant Squid Monster: (singing) The sea is alive with the sound of your death!

Ocean Master: Holy Crap!

Cue title: How Aquaman Should Have Ended.

Open with Arthur's biological mother beginning to swim back to Atlantis.

Arthur's Mother: Oh my dearest, whom I love with all my heart, now that I had destroyed your house, I must go back and marry the man I originally ran away from to make more babies because, reasons.

Arthur's Father: Or, maybe you could just, not do that.

Arthur's Mother: You mean stay?

Arthur's Father: Yeah, I mean it took them like, what two years to finally find us here. We could just move inland, and they'd probably never find us.

Arthur's Mother: Oh, Ok! Yeah, let's do that!

Fast Forward to when Arthur learns how to use a "trident" by a guy from Atlantis.

Atlantian Guy: This is a trident! Don't count the points, it's, it's a trident! And you're going to learn how to use it!

Until you do, your name is, Shark Bait!

Fish from Finding Nemo: Shark Bait! Ooo Ha Ha!

Fast Forward to Black Manta's army attacking Aquaman.

Black Manta: Help him! He's trapped! You can't leave him like this!

Aquaman: I'm not leaving anyone! I'm taking you to jail!

Aquaman pushes the sub to shore.

Aquaman: Wooooo!

Black Manta's army is now in jail.

Black Manta's Father: I'm very disappointed in you, son. I'm gonna need that knife back.

Fast Forward to Aquaman getting confronted by his Atlantian brother.

Arthur's Brother: Arthur, you're being tried for being our mother's first born, and not caring about our fish ways. What say you?

Aquaman says nothing.

Arthur's Brother: I said, what say you?!

Aquaman: I say, here fishy fishy fishy!

Several fish begin attacking his brother.

Arthur's Brother: What the? Ah! Oh my gosh! There's too many of them! (screams in sheer agony)

Fast Forward to the Ring of Fire.

Aquaman: What is this place?

Atlantian Guy: It's the Ring of Fire, Shark Bait!

Fish from Finding Nemo: Shark Bait! Ooo Ha Ha!

Fast Forward to Aquaman and Mera crashing their ship into lava.

Mera: Hold on! I'm gonna crash us in the lava!

The ship sinks in the lava when Aquaman and Mera escape in time.

Mera: There! Now they'll think we're dead.

Aquaman: Quick! Hide in this whale!

They get into a passing whale's mouth.

Cop # 1: Oh man! They crashed in the lava! They must be dead!

Cop # 2: Well, dis somebody check the tracking device?

Cop # 1: Oh yeah!

Mera's tracking device goes off.

Cop # 1: Hey, it says they're inside that whale right now.

Whale opens it's mouth.

Cop # 1: Freeze, sucka!

Aquaman: Aw man!

Fast Forward to when Arthur gets the suit.

But This is How it Really Should Have Ended.

Arthur: I'm just a dude, trying to do what's right, and if that's not good enough, then screw you!

Squid: If you can take the trident from Atlan's grip, then you shall be worthy of...

Batman comes down with his scuba gear and best guess? His cup.

Batman: Don't worry! I got this.

Batman: takes the trident from Atlan's dead body without a problem.

Arthur: What the?!

Cue the waterfall scene but instead of Arthur, Batman comes out wearing the suit still holding his cup.

Batman: Because I'm Batman!

Mera, Arthur's biological mother stare at him in surprise.

Batman: Hey hey, Chase! What's up? Been a long time!

Toothless comes in and stares at Batman in Aquaman's suit in surprise as well.

Cut to The New Super Cafe where Arthur isn't happy.

Arthur: No! No! No! No! No! I do not accept this!

Batman: Well, you kept telling that squid monster thing how much you were a nobody, so I figured, I'll just take it.

Arthur: You stole my victory, Bruce!

Batman: Hey, what's up? I'm Batman? You wanna know my secret identity?

Mera: Uh, Is it Bruce?

Batman: Oh, you heard him say that, did you?

Arthur: This is outrageous! You cannot wield the trident!

Batman: Oh, yes I can! Did you not hear me at the waterfall?

Superman: Why are you wearing those clothes? Did you take them off of a dead person?

Batman: well, he obviously didn't need them anymore.

Mera: Isn't that like, grave robbing?

Batman: Oh, so if I do it, it's rude. But if Aquaman does it, it's totally cool.

Mera: Yeah!

Arthur: Just give me back my trident. The Ocean Master must be stopped!

Batman: What for? Superman can handle it.

Superman: Yeah, I got this! No worries!

Superman goes underwater.

Ocean Master: Atlantis! Arise!

Superman: Your helmet is stupid! (punches him upward)

Ocean Master: (offscreen) I knew it!

Superman comes back to the cafe.

Batman: See? Justice League, bro!

Superman: Yeah, I thought we started something here. You can't just be going rouge on us now!

Batman: Yeah. Where's Diana? Where's Flash? Where's Cyborg?

Arthur: Uh, I don't know. Having their own adventures. Look, I'm not going rouge! I'm having my own origin story. That also takes place after our team up story.

Batman: Nobody wants that!

Superman: Justice League, Man!

Cyborg, Wonder Woman, and Flash walk by from outside playing Pokemon GO.

Cyborg, Wonder Woman: Hey, hey Aquaman!

Flash: Nice one!

Wonder Woman: You must be so proud!

Batman: See, what I mean? They're devastated!

Arthur: Could it be that maybe you guys are just a teeny bit jealous?

Superman: What? No!

Batman: What? We're not jealous!

Superman: What would we ever have to be jealous about?

Arthur: That everyone expected Aquaman to be lame! And I made it look epic, and exciting!

Batman: No! That's not...

Superman: That's great!

Arthur: Or is it that I single handedly made over a $1,000,000,000?

Superman and Batman: NO!

Batman: Congratulations.

Superman: $1,000,000,000!

Batman: So happy for you.

Arthur: Oh, I know what it is.

Batman: There's really no need to explore this.

Arthur: It's because both my parents are still alive.

Batman: (gasp) How dare you!

Arthur: And their names aren't Martha.

Arthur takes his suit and trident back and leaves with Mera making a hole in the roof.

Superman: Oh, it hurts!

Batman: Oh, it's true!

Superman: It's true!

Batman: Why would you say that?

Superman: I lost both my dads!

Batman: We both don't have our parents!

Superman: I still have a mom, kind of.

But Aquaman has both of them!

Superman: Aaagh!

Batmann: It's so not fair!

Aquaman is holding Mera in his suit and trident over the city.

THE END.

Cut to the post credits.

Aquaman: Permission to come aboard? (winks his eyebrow)

Soldier # 1: Aagh! Too Sexy! (faints)

Soldier # 2: Eegh! Too Sexy! (faints)

Bucky: (after seeing Aquaman wink) AAAAAH! Too Sexy!

He crashes the helicopter onto the submarine.