Planet 51


 * [first lines]
 * Girl: I've never gone parking before. I'm really not that kind of a girl.
 * Boy: Well, I'm not the kind of a guy who would go with that kind of a girl.
 * Girl: Oh, that's so sweet, I think.
 * Boy: There's nothing to be scared of.
 * [they both try to kiss, then the Humaniac appears, then they both scream]
 * Girl: I knew this would happen if we made out!
 * [they both drive away, zapping the restuarant, then they stop the car, then the Humaniac appears, landing on the ground, shooting at the Humaniac]
 * General: Good shot, son.
 * [they both run away, then the Humaniac alien appears]
 * Soldier 1: Uh, General, I think he's surrendering.
 * [the Humaniac walks out, zapping at the guards, and the tank]
 * Soldiers: Run! Run!
 * General: Fire at will!
 * [the soldiers shoot at the Humaniac, putting a shield around it, putting electric circles in the sky, with Humaniac UFOs, then they fly down, shooting everything]
 * Soldier: Help!
 * General: Keep firing. Keep firing! Keep firing! [throws a hat away] Kill every last alien!
 * [the Humaniac alien laughs, then they shoot at the people, then they scream]
 * Humaniac: You will all become my alien zombies.
 * [Eckle eats the popcorn, then the woman takes Eckle outside]
 * Eckle: Ouch, Mom!
 * All: Command us, Master!
 * [the Humaniac zaps a laser, then the music begins "Lollipop" by Sophie Green playing]
 * Woman: What did I tell you about these kind of movies?
 * Eckle: It was almost over! Besides, they're all the same.
 * Woman: That's not true.
 * [the birds fly around, then the title card appears, then cut to a man reading the newspaper, with the woman walking with Eckle]
 * Policeman: [cooing] You know, he looks just like his father.
 * [the egg burps]
 * Policeman: [laughing] Just like his father.
 * [the woman walks with a dog, putting steam at the light, then she continues walking, then Eckle goes with mom in a car, then the light tips down, passing by a gas station, then cut to the man sweeping on the ground, hearing thunder, putting around the sky]
 * Man 1: Oh, I hate the rain.
 * [the rocks pour the rain]
 * Man 2: [uses an umbrella] Raining rocks and dogs. Great!
 * [the clouds roll away by the sky, then the girl plays on the hopscotch, then they go to Glipforg Observatory]
 * Lem: Space, a universe of mystery. Well, today, the mystery will be unveiled. Thanks to science, we now know the universal is nearly 500 miles long and it contains, you're not going to believe this, over 1,000 stars.
 * [they all yawn]
 * Skiff: Psst! Lem, come on! Liven it up!
 * Lem: And still, the only known intelligent life is right here on our planet.
 * [the filmreel destroys the saturn, then they gasp]
 * Lem: [puts the film back] No, not today! Not today! Please.
 * Boy: What was that?
 * Eckle: That's our planet after they attack the Humaniacs. They're gonna eat our brains for dinner!
 * Boy: Is that true?
 * Lem: Everybody, please, that's ridiculous.
 * Skiff: Totally ridiculous. Brains for dinner? Come on! Brains are for breakfst with cereal and milk. Dinner is organs and eyeballs.
 * [they all shriek]
 * Lem: Okay, everyone, everyone, please, listen up. We're not getting eaten or harvested or having our brains barbecued. The universe isn't scary, it's really amazing. And don't forget to pick up your planetary yo-yos. [forms a triangle shape with a planet] We've got one for each of you.
 * [they all cheer]
 * Lem: You're looking at the new Junior Assistant Curator! High four! Whoo-hoo! [claps Skiff]
 * [they all walk out]
 * Lem: Well, it's part-time now and full-time after I graduate.
 * Man: How did you do, Lem?
 * Lem: Got the job!
 * Man: Know you would!
 * Lem: Hey, I can see my whole life. A house, a car, two kids, they'll grow up and have kids. They'll come to visit on holidays.
 * Man: Well?
 * Lem: Got it!
 * Policeman: Lem, congratulations on your job. I knew you could do it.
 * Lem: Yeah, thanks.
 * [the policeman drives away]
 * Both: Oh, wow!
 * [they all go to the sign]
 * Skiff: There it is. Just two more days.
 * Eckle: Wow. Humaniacs III: The Final Battle for Our World.
 * Both: Victory or extinction!
 * [they both imitate sound effects and they hum a movie theme]
 * Lem: If you guys go in costume, I'm pretending we never met.
 * Skiff: Did you just say what I think you just said?
 * Lem: I'm a planetarium professional now. I don't have time for kids' movies anymore.
 * Skiff: [gasps] Kids' movies? I suppose next you'll say aliens don't exist.
 * Lem: Duh!
 * Skiff: Ha! Just as I thought. You're not Lem. You're an alien zombie, like in Humaniacs II.
 * Lem: Skiff, I'm not a zombie.
 * Skiff: Yeah, that's what you zombies are programmed to say. Tell me something the real Lem would know.
 * Lem: Well, I know Skiff is the only nutcase who thinks the government is hiding all alien evidence in Base 9. And you give candy to your puppy so he'll poop jelly beans.
 * ''[Eckle exclaims in disgust]
 * Skiff: It was just an experiment. With all due respect, I've put in the hours and done a lot of alien research at work.
 * Lem: [stammers] What are you talking about? You work in a comic book store!
 * Skiff: The greatest source of scientific knowledge.
 * Haglug: [offscreen] Skiff, time to unpack the fake alien poop.
 * Skiff: Right away, Mr. Haglug. You believe me, Lem, when aliens put you on the takeout menu.
 * Lem: [looks at a book] Wow!
 * Haglug: Skiff!
 * Skiff: I love fake-alien-poop day.
 * ''[cut to the neighborhood]