I Love You, Iron Man / Ben 10 Franklin

(Scene begins with Iron Man and War Machine fighting Whiplash.)

Whiplash: GAAAAHHHH!

Iron Man and War Machine: Patty cake, patty cake, bake this man! (Fries Whiplash for good)

[clinks]

[War Machine flies off]

Iron Man: Now that Whiplash is gone, and the government's off my back, it looks like it's just you and me, kid.

(Later...)

Iron Man: So, whatcha doing?

Pepper Potts: Working.

Iron Man: Wanna turn the dog into an Iron Dog?

Pepper Potts: No.

Iron Man: Wanna replace Nick Fury's eyepatch with a waffle?

Pepper Potts: No.

Iron Man: You wanna.....

Pepper Potts: Look, I like being your girlfriend, but maybe you should find a guy friend.

Iron Man: JARVIS is a guy. Right, JARVIS?

JARVIS: I'm just a machine, man. Get a real friend!

Iron Man: Sheesh, and I thought iron was cold.

[Title card: I Love You, Iron Man]

Iron Man: This is great, Spidey. I love New York. Where are we going? A club? The four seasons?

Spider-Man: Better!

Iron Man: And... we're at your parents' house.

Spider-Man: She's my aunt, actually. So what do you wanna play? Warcraft? Magic?

Iron Man: Magic? What are you, 16?

Spider-Man: Yes, actually.

Iron Man: Oh, uhh, hey, look, the, uhh, "Iron Signal". Gotta go! (Flips on the iron mask) Cool if I use your skylight?

Spider-Man: I don't have a sky--

[Iron Man flies off]

Iron Man: I gotta say Optimus Prime is a pretty cool name.

Optimus Prime: What are you doing? I'm Optimus Prime.

Iron Man: Oh, your profile said you were a truck so I figure--

Optimus Prime: I have the power to change to a truck.

Iron Man: I think the power to update your profile pic might be more helpful.

[Iron Man flies off while Optimus Prime un-friends Iron Man]

Iron Man: I just figure we have alot in common so--

Doctor Doom: Ooh, ooh, I never had a metal friend before. You want a cape like mine? Then we can look exactly alike.

Iron Man: Actually I, I, I think I'm okay without the--

Doctor Doom: You're right. You're right. I think a scarf and a hat will look better on you. Ooh, now we can rule the together and make all sort of fun stuff. Okay. Okay. I'm the leader of Latveria, and, uh, I stand like this. [Doctor Doom evil poses] What do you do? [Iron Man flies off] I like mine better.

Iron Man: There are no good friends anywhere.

War Machine: Maybe the answer is closer than you think. (Flips open mask)

Iron Man: What the--? How long had you been in there?

War Machine: 'Bout a week and a half. Battery died and I been stuck in here ever since. Didn't you hear me yelling?

Iron Man: No.

[ONE WEEK EARLIER...]

War Machine: 'TONY! BEHIND YOU! I'M STUCK IN THIS!' (Iron Man doesn't listen)

(Back to the current week.)

War Machine: Anyway, what I'm trying to say is maybe a friend is someone who shares the same interest and fashion sense.

Iron Man: I think I know what you mean.

Pepper Potts: You built a robot duplicate of yourself?

Robot Clone: Hey, loser, let's ditch Peter Piper here and have some real fun.

Iron Man: Wow, I never realize I'm awesome!

[clink]

Robot Clone: Now give me the Lamborghini keys and let's get outta here.

Iron Man: My car. I drive.

Robot Clone: MY car. I drive.

[groaning, they both continue to groan, until.....]

Pepper Potts: Your own robot clone beat you up.

Iron Man: I don't get it. It's a perfect replica of me. Why is it such a jerk?

Pepper Potts: Uh, what are we gonna do?

Iron Man: Wanna turn the dog into an Iron Dog? [Pepper Potts annoyed]

War Machine: Tony, look, we need to talk.

Robot Clone: No thanks, Bore Machine. [War Machine gets angry, he tackles the robot clone and pushes him against the wall]

War Machine: Listen to me, I'm constantly trying to be nice to you and you always turn me away. I'm sick of it! You are the worst friend ever!

[War Machine fires his guns, spelling "BF 4 NEVA". They keep firing at the robot until he goes KABLOOEY!]

Iron Man: Way to go! You destroy the robot me.

War Machine: The robot you. Oh, yeah, yeah, the robot you.

Iron Man: This whole time I needed a friend, and you were here all along.

War Machine: I don't know if I wanna be your friend, Tony.

Iron Man: I'll pay you a million dollars.

[cash register ring]

War Machine: I love you, Iron Man﻿.

(Photos of Iron Man and War Machine having fun, turning the dog into an Iron Dog and replacing Nick Fury's eyepatch with a waffle.)

Ben Franklin: I, Ben Franklin, shall prove once and for all that lightning-- (Ben gets electrocuted.) Well, slap my face on a $100 bill. What do we have here? (He pushes the Omnitrix and transforms into Four Arms.)

Four Arms: This is so much cooler than electricity.

(Title card: Ben 10 Franklin)

Thomas Jefferson: Who wants to sign the Declaration of Independence next?

Ben Franklin: Hmm, John Hancock's signature is going to be tough to beat unless-- (He pushes the Omnitrix and turns into Swampfire.)

Swampfire: I sign it in '''FIRE! '''(the paper catches on fire) We have more than one of these, right?

Jetray: Yo G-Wash, my man.

George Washington: Oh brother, just ignore him and maybe he'll go away.

Jetray: Hey, you guys need a lift?

George Washington: No, Ben, we're fine, really.

George and his Crew: Woah!

Jetray: Guys, check it out. I can shoot outta my eyes and my tail. (some of George's crew falls off the boat)

Jetray: Don't worry, I'll save them.

George Washington: No Ben! Wait!

NRG: Uh-oh, I don't think this guy can fly.

George and his Crew: Aah!

Ben Franklin: Gentlemen, I'm going to ask you to surrender.

John Burgoyne: And who's going to make us, little round man? Ha, ha, ha, ha!

Ben Franklin: Me, myself, and--

Humungousaur: HUMUNGOUSAUR! Take that and that. Yeah! How would you like it if I came to your country? In fact... Big Ben, meet Bigger Ben! YEAH! (USA!) Now there's just one more bit of business I need to take care of.

Mark's Wife: May I help you?

Humungousaur: Hi, is- is Mark here?

Mark's Wife: Um, yeah. Just- just a sec.

♪ Do do do do do ♪

Mark: Hi. Do I know you?

Humungousaur: It's me, Ben Franklin! Junior high? You used to tease me all the time and call me Fatty McGee.

Mark: Oh, Ben. Listen, for what it's worth, I'm really sorry.

Humungousaur: Oh, really? Hmm. I was gonna smash your house down. Well, uh, I did come all the way down here. Uh, do you wanna grab a burger or something?

Mark: Uh, I would, you know, but I got the family now--

Humungousaur: Oh, yeah, right, right. No, no, no, problem.

Mark: Listen, you take care of yourself.

Humungousaur: I will, you too. Oh, by the way, (He smashes his house) YEAH! (BEN RULES!!!)