Melter Skelter


 * Beth: (off-screen) Guys?
 * (Beth arrives)
 * Beth: Where are you guys? Guys! (Rumbling) (Breathing Hard)
 * Izzy: Uh, are you okay? 'Cause it looks like you're gonna spew
 * Beth: Last night... I saw... a commercial for the everything horse!
 * Cody, Leshawna and Izzy: Wow!
 * Beth: My cousin is getting an everything horse for her birthday and I need to get one before she does because I hate my cousin.
 * Jude: Cool. What's it do?
 * Beth: (Gasps) Only everything!
 * Girl: I'm bored.
 * Guy: Bored? That's because you don't have the everything horse! A hyper realistic toy horse so you can ride! But with one push of a button... now your horse is a unicorn!
 * Girl: Woooooow!
 * Guy: But that's not all! The horn is also cool, non-copyright infringing laser sword! That's full of candy!
 * Cody: Wow. I love dandy and swords! If only it was sea-worthy.
 * Beth: Look!
 * Guy: Wish granted! Now it is! Your very own - Viking ship!
 * Girl: Yar.
 * Guy: "Yar" is what pirates say. That horse is clearly a Viking ship. C'mon! Learn your history!
 * Leshawna: That's sounds good and all, but It'd rather with my baby doll.
 * Beth: Then listen to this!
 * Guy: What on conquest of foreign lands is over, guess what? The everything horse is ready to settle down and have... a baby!
 * Jude, Izzy, Harold and Cody: Awwww!
 * Leshawna: I need some baby horse!
 * Harold: Yeah, but it can do this? Yeeeaaa!!! OOH!
 * Beth: Would you let me finish?!
 * Guy: Did you think just because the everything horse had a baby she wouldn't be fun anymore? Wrong! The hard working horse mother is also a full-time ninja!
 * Beth: Okay, now I'm finished!
 * All: Yay!!!
 * Leshawna: I wanna change horse diapers!
 * Cody: What kind of candy is in the horse's unicorn sword?
 * Harold: Where did the ninja horse train?
 * Beth: I have no idea! But we gotta tell Chef we need an everything horse!
 * All: Cheeeeeeeeeeeef!
 * (Chef arrives)
 * Chef: What's the matter? Who's hurt?
 * Leshawna: We have an emergency... for a new toy!
 * Izzy: Called the bazooka lightning shark!
 * Beth: It's called "the everything horse".
 * Izzy: Yeah, that! My bad!
 * Leshawna: I did a head count and we need a least two dozen!
 * Chef: Why would you need a toy? You've got plenty of toys. Look at this great horse!
 * Harold: Does it turn into a boat?
 * Chef: Uh, I don't think you really know how horses work. Or boats. (Shows them a sword) And look at this cool sword!
 * Cody: It's it full of candy?
 * Chef: What?! No. That's not where candy comes from! Swords are made of brawn and steel! How are you today, Sandy Doll?
 * Sandy Doll: (Evil Laughs)
 * Chef: Ahhh! Possessed evil doll! Get away from me!
 * Gwen: Nice. I'll take that.
 * Chef: Beth, the angel wings harp!