Chapter Fifty-Six

Latin lover narrator: All right, people, lots coming up. As you know, Michael died. And three years later, well, it was still really hard. Also hard, Jane's nightmare boss, Chloe. But guess what? She just got some amazing news.

A publisher wants to buy my novel about Michael.

Latin lover narrator: Go, Jane!

(cheering)

And as for her parents, well, things were looking up for them, too. See, they'd been estranged for the past two years, because of how Xo was portrayed on Rogelio's reality show, The De La Vega-Factor Factor. That's right. She was known as the evil ex. But Rogelio convinced her he knew nothing about that. So they were trying to move past it. Also moving forward, Jane's baby daddy, Rafael. See, he went to prison and came back all Zen.

Just breathe.

Latin lover narrator: And he had a new girlfriend, Abbey, a super sweet greeting card designer. And as for his other baby mama, Petra, well, she had rebranded the Marbella and turned it into a kids' hotel. And she had a new beau, too: Chuck Chesser, the owner of the Fairwick Hotel next door. And she wanted to keep the relationship under wraps, but alas, nothing stays buried around here. Which is where we left off. Afterwards, after Michael, there were times when reality felt overwhelming and... well, let's have Jane tell us.

And my heart is racing, I'm sweating, everything looks and sounds far away.

(sniffles) It's like I'm dying.

Yeah, that's definitely a panic attack.

And I can give you some tools.

Yes. Please, yes.

First, take a deep breath, put your hand on your heart and give yourself a reality check.

Remind yourself that you are not dying and that this is just a physical sensation that will pass.

Then go through a checklist to figure out the trigger.

HALT.

Are you hungry, angry, lonely or tired?

Usually all four.

Try to figure out which is strongest, and then keep breathing.

And when the panic attack passes, address the underlying trigger.

Okay, I'll give it a try.

I feel really bad, so terrible.

Go on.

I think I'm ready to stop therapy.

Latin lover narrator: Ah, the awkward therapy breakup. Who hasn't been there?

That's great, Jane.

(sighs)

It means we've made real progress.

Latin lover narrator: Hmm, mine was much more awkward.

You have been so helpful.

Latin lover narrator: Then again, I led with expensive.

And I will take everything I learned with me.

Latin lover narrator: Which she did, for the record. Especially that deep breathing technique.

Chloe: Why did you cancel my therapist?

Are you an idiot?

Latin lover narrator: Not for panic attacks, but for panic-inducing bosses.

I canceled your appointment because you texted me late last night asking me to cancel it.

Well, you should have known that if I'm texting you late at night about my therapist, I really need my therapist.

You're right. I'm sorry.

Latin lover narrator: I know what you're thinking: Jane just got a book deal. Why is she still working for this demon?

And my latte is cold!

(gasps)

Narrator: Well, at least it's cold. Screw it, I'm going to be optimistic!

I don't know how you don't quit that job 15 times a day.

I haven't gotten the official offer for my book deal yet.

I need to know what number I'm working with before I give them my notice.

Abbey: I think you're being completely reasonable.

Latin lover narrator: Oh, my bad. I actually forgot she was there.

Thanks, lady. See?

No, do not gang up on me.

(chuckles) We're not. She's just right.

Anyway, I got to run. My Something Borrowed, Something Blue line just came in Something Turquoise.

Latin lover narrator: Hey, what's wrong with turquoise? I love turquoise.

Love you.

I love you.

Mwah.

Mwah.

I know, right? They're already at “I love you.”

That's major.

Man: We had a reservation.

Elvis: I know and I'm sorry, but we're backed up, and it's currently an hour wait.

This is unacceptable.

(quietly): If you move the planters by the railing, you can push two tables together.

Thank you.

Mm-hmm.

Enjoy.

You are a lifesaver.

He'll learn.

I hope so.

Scott was a creepy, scheming weirdo, but he was a damn good lounge manager.

May he rest in peace.

Speaking of which, don't you have to... ?

Yeah. I do.

Good luck.

Latin lover narrator: I know what you're thinking. Good luck with what?

Dennis: Okay, the results are in.

We've concluded that Scott Archuletta's body was officially found on the grounds of...

Latin lover narrator: Actually, I should jump in real quick. That's Dennis. You remember Dennis, right? Michael's old BFF at the police department. He's been promoted to, like, major or admiral or colonel or something. Anyway, he's now running the dead Scott investigation. Okay, let's continue. Scott's body was on the grounds of... the Fairwick Hotel and not the Marbella.

♪ ♪

So, I got a stiff on my property. So what?

Accidents happen.

Problem is, we don't know if it's an accident yet.

Could be a homicide.

So that's what we have to try to figure out.

Petra: Chuck, wait!

Hi.

Couldn't resist a private good-bye, huh?

Uh, no, I just, I wanted to see if you needed some advice.

Since, you know, the Marbella's been here before.

A few times.

Latin lover narrator: Hold on, that elderly guest died peacefully in his sleep.

What's your angle?

What?

Darlin', I've been in bed with you.

You only think about yourself.

Latin lover narrator: Whoa. TMI, Chuck.

What are you trying to get me to do?

Nothing. I'm trying to help you.

Let's just stick to the language of love, sweetheart.

And I'll take care of my own hotel.

(elevator bell dings)

Okay, so regardless of where Scott was found, we have to get out in front of the story.

I'm implementing a complete lockdown.

All media calls will be forwarded directly to me, the staff will inform guests that the blocked-off area on the beach is due to renovations, and security have been given strict orders to keep all press off the premises.

But don't you think...

This is a kids hotel.

A whisper of murder and we're ruined.

You are ruining me.

Only the finest masseuses for my new bride.

(moaning)

Your hands feel so good on my body. (moans)

That oil is so slippery and delicious.

Can you rub it... even lower?

Tanning oil does feel so good on the skin.

Tripp: Cut!

Rogelio, this cabana boy is moving in on your woman on your romantic Hawaiian honeymoon!

You're supposed to fly into a jealous rage and then hit her up with your catchphrase.

“I just want to be factored in”

Yes, I know that's what I would have said, but, remember, this is a kinder, gentler The De La Vega-Factor Factor.

No jealous rages.

I just want to do a show about a happy, well-adjusted fake married couple.

(phone vibrates)

Okay. Dad'll be here soon.

Great.

I'm really glad we're doing this.

Latin lover narrator: Ah, yes, you'll recall, Xo and Ro put their fight behind them.

Me, too. It's about time.

Come on, Mr. Sweetface.

Your daddy's on his way to pick you up.

Before we get started, I just wanted to say something.

I'm so happy that we're all here together to share in this moment, when I show you what a liar Rogelio really is.

I'll go talk to her. We'll go again.

Why? That was perfect.

We'll make it seem like she lost it because of you and Darci.

Come on, she just spilled coffee on herself.

America doesn't know that.

Ro, buddy, this is the drama that we have been looking for.

It's gonna send the ratings through the roof.

Fine. Just this once.

You said you didn't know anything about it.

I knew you were lying!

Rogelio: I know.

I'm so, so sorry.

I didn't think it would become such a big deal.

I would...

Go!

Xiomara...

Just go now.

Latin lover narrator: Wow, this Rogelio thing is really affecting her, huh? Oh, no, this is bad. I know what you're thinking: “Wait, doesn't Jane like Dennis just fine? ” Well, the answer is no, but I don't have time to explain now. Just trust me.

Jane?

She hasn't had a panic attack in forever.

Jane?

Remember your coping mechanisms, Jane.

(panting)

Jane?

Jane?

Latin lover narrator: Wow. Even I didn't see that coming.

Oh, my God. I'm so...

No, um... (stammers)

I can't believe that I did that.

I-It's okay.

But you deserved it. And... But I am so sorry.

Look, can we talk?

No.

Jane, we...

I don't want to talk to you ever.

(panting)

I still can't believe it.

(sniffles) I know.

(crying)

I'm gonna check up on you, okay?

(sniffles)

I know.

It's just...

(sighs) I started having a panic attack.

I was thrown. I wasn't expecting to see him.

Apparently, he's running the Scott investigation at the hotel, so he has to interview all the employees, including you and me.

I'll be fine.

I just wasn't prepared.

Now I'm prepared.

Petra: No.

A salad lead time of 11 minutes is unacceptable.

All salads and cold apps need to be delivered to the table within six minutes of the order being placed.

I understand. I'm sorry.

It won't happen again.

Hey, yesterday it was 15 minutes.

So he's improving.

I am getting so tired of Zen Rafael.

You hired him; you fire him.

(phone chimes)

Oh, no.

Someone leaked the story.

I hate to say I told you so.

Latin lover narrator: And yet...

We should've gotten ahead of it.

All it takes is one disgruntled employee.

(whispers): And trust me, we have more than one.

Sonia: So, so sorry for the wait.

Great. You told me so. That's not important.

What do we do now?

I know this doesn't undo what I did, but please accept my apologies.

I had my assistant go nuts at the bookstore.

There are books about writing books, books about reading books...

Dad, I appreciate all the books, but...

Even books about forgiving.

“Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself.”

Deepak Chopra.

Via Suzanne Somers.

Look, I know that you're sorry, but...

I never meant to hurt anyone.

But you did.

And it's gonna take a while for people to forgive you no matter how many books you buy.

I understand.

I'm just trying to get the process started.

Because I love you, Jane. You know that.

And I love you, too.

But I-I don't think Mom's gonna get past this.

Her Ropology basket is a work of art.

(phone chimes)

Oh, my God. It's my offer from the publisher.

Latin lover narrator: I'm so excited! Let's see how much money Jane's going to get.

(shrieks)

I am getting $50,000!

What? That's it?

(chuckles): That's barely my episodic rate.

No, that's amazing. $50,000 is a lot of money.

It's a huge amount of money. What was I thinking?

Let me get that scene from the top.

$50,000, Jane! Holy moly!

Congratulations!

Oh... (laughs)

It's a year's salary.

So I can finally give my two-week notice to Chloe.

Latin lover narrator: Oh, yeah. Someone's got her quittin' heels on.

I have had it with Chloe and her ridiculous notes.

I am not a hack, Jane!

No one said you are, Gary. You know Chloe.

You just got to breathe through it. (inhales)

(exhales): Ah...

We'll talk later, okay?

Latin lover narrator: Or hashtag “someone else's problem.”

So, I have some exciting news.

After the writers' showcase, I was actually offered a book deal.

And?

And... yay!

So I'm giving my two-week notice.

And I wanted to say thank you for the wonderful opportunity.

It was amazing.

So thank you.

Very, very, very much.

No.

Two weeks' notice is unacceptable.

I need at least six months, preferably a year, to find and train a new assistant.

(stammers)

T-Two weeks' notice is pretty much industry standard.

Now you're lecturing me on industry standard?

No. God, never. No.

Uh... I could stay a little longer.

(groans): Oh, please.

Go. You were terrible at your job.

What?

And you're deluding yourself if you think this book deal's going anywhere, especially with that ridiculous D-list publisher.

But congrats, you're a half a step above self-publishing online.

Wow.

Chloe... you're a horrible person.

And I tried to make excuses for you over the years, like maybe your parents didn't hug you, or maybe you grew up in a prison like Bane from that Batman movie, but I just think it comes down to who you are: a petty, mean-spirited bitch!

Latin lover narrator: Atta girl, Jane. I'm proud of you. She deserved that.

God knows Scott did not deserve this.

And I am so sad about this.

(sobs softly)

Which is why... we're dedicating this fountain to him, and creating a scholarship fund in his name for disadvantaged youth.

(sighs) And even though he died next-door, and not here at his beloved Marbella, his tragic loss will reverberate through these halls for years to come.

Farewell, my friend.

Farewell.

(applause)

Just know I feel terrible.

Van: You should.

It's like North Korea here.

Everyone's scared to say anything to Kim Jong-Chloe.

She told me to figure out everything you knew but not to call you.

If I get caught...

Don't worry, it sounds like she wants you to call me but doesn't want you to know she wants you to call me.

You're fine. And you've got...

15 more minutes before she gets back from therapy, so hit me up.

Sweat and Spin password?

Zero-three-ten.

Blowout Heaven stylist?

Lana for Beachy Waves, Quentin if she wants a Straight-Up, and always with a scalp massage.

Always with a scalp massage.

Van: Got it.

Coffee order?

Jane: For a cold brew, Davey's 20-ounce Baridi Blend.

For tea, InstaJava Venti Iced Green Latte. And don't leave there without an Edamame Hummus Wrap. She'll say that she doesn't want one, but she'll always ask for it later.

(knocking) Hang on.

Hurry.

Jane: You're good on time.

Legal docs for Jane Villanueva.

Van, it's a messenger with documents from the publishing house for me to sign.

Shut up. Oh, my God!

Chloe's favorite massage therapist?

She wants something called the pounder?

Oh, no.

Van: Yep.

Did I mention Gary finally dropped us?

He's taking his next book to HarperCollins.

Uh, 90 minutes with Mary.

Van, let me call you back.

¿Qué pasa?

I-It's about when I get paid for my novel.

Latin lover narrator: And that's when Jane finally got her check.

I don't get $50,000 all at once.

I get $5,000 now, another five when I turn in my first draft, and the rest after the book is published.

Holy crap! I just quit my job.

I need to get my job back!

(groans) Of course I need to get it back.

Rafael: Why?

You hate that job.

Abbey: You have been complaining about it forever.

Latin lover narrator: Oops. Sorry. My bad again.

Maybe this could be a good thing.

It's just that publishing jobs are so hard to find, especially in Miami.

And I know Chloe hasn't filled my position yet.

Here's a thought.

Our new lounge manager isn't working out.

You could replace him.

Oh... God, no.

Why not?

I left waitressing behind.

This isn't waitressing; this is management.

This is a step up in responsibility and pay.

A wrong step. A step backwards, or sideways.

Mateo, use your words.

Help me!

Please.

Please!

I just need to do some intense groveling, and... hope it works.

Okay, the basket's all done.

Latin lover narrator: Aw. Jane's first apology basket.

Let's see what she's giving Chloe.

What do you think?

Latin lover narrator: Not bad for a first-timer.

Chloe loves vintage jewelry.

(phone vibrates)

(breathes deeply)

Yeah.

My interview with Dennis is scheduled for tomorrow.

(sighs)

Latin lover narrator: As it happens, friends, Dennis did stop by to check on Jane.

So, did you go to the pickup game?

Yeah.

Latin lover narrator: And it turned into a regular thing.

Stayed five minutes, then I left.

Why?

Some guy asked where The Gunner was.

The Gunner?

Mm-hmm.

That was Michael's nickname on the court.

Because he was always gunning.

The dude would never pass.

(chuckles)

Seriously?

I didn't know Michael was such a ball hog.

Oh, yeah. He made a lot, and he missed a lot.

But he just kept shooting.

(chuckles)

So... you ready to go through his things?

(exhales)

(softly): Yeah.

And thank you for being here for this.

Of course.

(panting, sighing)

(exhales)

I just have to get through this stupid interview.

Rafael: Just breathe.

Don't tell me to breathe, Rafael.

My breathing is not the problem. The problem is Elvis.

The demotion didn't work. He's also a horrible waiter.

If you won't fire him, I will.

No, don't. You can't.

I'll find some other place for him.

Why do you care so much?

I just... do.

That's all.

Okay. Fine.

Look, I... met Elvis in prison.

Oh, my God. Prison?

Don't freak out.

It was a nonviolent crime.

Oh, you-you hired...

He's a good guy. He just needs a chance.

An ex-con to work in a kids' hotel?

Why? Why do we have to give him a chance?

Because it's really tough for ex-cons to get work.

And he has restaurant experience.

I was just trying to do a good thing.

If it makes you feel better, I'll just put him in maintenance, okay, away from the kids and the cash.

Fine. Maintenance.

And I'm running a background check.

(phones vibrate, chime)

Oh, my God, it worked.

Your plan actually worked.

“High praise to the owners of the Marbella for raising $12,000 in honor of their deceased employee, Scott Archuletta.”

“Chuck Chesser, owner of the Fairwick Hotel, where the body was found, has refused to comment. His conspicuous absence from the Marbella memorial raises the question: Could the Fairwick be covering something?”

I lied, and I covered it up, and I'm just so sorry, but, Xo, please, just call me back.

(sighs)

You! I know what you did!

What are you talking about?

You sent that video to Xo, and now our relationship is ruined!

I don't know anything about a video.

You're a liar! I should have never trusted you!

I didn't do it, Rogelio, I swear!

It was probably Tripp.

Come on. You said the only way you'd keep doing the show is if we made it kinder and gentler.

And I agreed, because I need you.

It wasn't me, I promise.

Okay.

Okay?

Now can we deal with this after and get this scene shot?

All right, let's do this!

And action!

Close your eyes, my love.

I made it myself.

(gasps)

It's my apology for being jealous of the cabana boy.

I'm sorry.

Latin lover narrator: And speaking of apologies... looks like Jane's got her “please give me my job back” heels on.

Oh, what are you doing here?

Please. I just want to talk to you.

And Van told me that you threw out my basket.

Latin lover narrator: Good thing Alba kept her earrings.

And since you won't let me past reception, and I know your schedule, I...

Geez, you have to have, like, an engineering degree to get this... up.

I got it. (chuckles)

Look, Chloe...

I just want to say that I am so sorry that I quit, and I...

(loud dance music begins)

Okay.

Are you ready to be your best self today?

Let's make every minute count.

Out of the saddle!

(dance music continues)

We're almost at the crest of Mount Fuji, people!

You're almost there! You own this mountain!

Today is your day!

(talking under loud music)

Latin lover narrator: I know! I can't hear her, either. I assume she's apologizing. Or hyperventilating.

Instructor: Whoo!

You made it to the top.

Now break away from the pack.

(groans)

(music stops)

Wow.

That was intense.

Do they provide a wheelchair, or do you just crawl out?

Chloe... please, can we talk?

Just wait.

No, just give me a second!

(groans) Okay.

(grunts)

Are you kidding me right now?

(grunts)

Wait!

(panting) Chloe!

Wait. I know I was rash.

I got caught up in the excitement of getting a book deal, and I shouldn't have quit.

But I know you haven't found a replacement, and let's face it, no one knows you better than I do. Please.

No.

I can get Gary back.

I'm listening.

I know him. He trusts me.

Remember, I got him to add commas into The Golden Hour, even though he's morally opposed to commas?

And you yourself said that it made the book readable.

Just give me a chance.

Hey, what do you have to lose?

Fine. If you can get Gary back, you can have your job back.

(car door closes)

Hey, Gary, I was hoping that we could meet for a drink.

And, look, I know that you already made your decision, but I just wanted to talk to you about it, okay?

Uh, call me back.

Latin lover narrator: Deep breaths, Jane. I've been doing it, too, and I am definitely finding narrating a lot less stressful this episode. Usually I'm like, “There's so much exposition. How can I fit it all in?”

How's Lindsay?

That's his fiancée. She's a third-year resident at Miami General. They met in college. See? Stress-free exposition.

She's fine. Busy with work.

Thanks for asking.

About what happened the other day...

I just want to get this over with.

So, what kind of guy was Scott? Did you like him?

Was he trustworthy?

(pen clicks)

I really think you'll feel better after going through this stuff.

Jane: I hope so.

I could have sworn I had another box buried (camera clicking) in the back of the closet somewhere.

No rush. I've got all day.

(camera clicking)

What the hell do you think you're doing?

Are you spying on me?!

Jane, there's been an ongoing investigation into whether Michael wasconnected to Sin Rostro.

He didn't do anything!

I'm just trying to clear his name!

No! Just get out!

Dennis (echoing): Jane? Was he trustworthy?

Oh.

(sighs)

Mm.

Hmm.

Rafael: Who are you?

I'm a momtrepreneur!

Hold one second for Anna!

Are you worried about your boyfriend?

He's not my boyfriend.

And, no, I'm worried about us.

If this is ruled a...

M-U-R-D-E-R, this is going to be very bad for everyone.

We don't need cops hanging around our hotel for months.

My God, do you have to film everything they do?

In a few years, you'll be glad I have all these recordings.

Krishna!

Find out every event that happened here in the days around Scott's death... uh, weddings, parties, bar mitzvahs, everything. I want a list.

And we need to contact everyone on that list to get their recordings.

(women laughing, squealing)

Ladies, this is for my sizzle reel, so would you mind screaming when you see me across the room?

One of you can even burst into tears if that feels right.

(women laughing)

Rogelio: Of course I have the footage, and I'll be happy to help. I know all about detective work from my time as Detective Christian Contreras in the smash hit telenovela Investigando El Peligro!

I'm sorry. I don't speak Spanish.

Oh. Investigating Danger.

Right. Yeah, well, hopefully.

Well, since you were shooting all over the hotel that night, I'm just hoping we'll find some footage of Scott.

I'm sorry. Can you please slow down?

Hmm?

Your accent is very strong.

Ooh, I love this part!

You laugh at a port?

Why would I laugh at a parrot?

No. I'm just saying this is such a gem.

Can't you go to the gym later?

There's hours and hours of footage here.

Or what?

What?

Please just slow down.

Wait! This is it!

I know. This is the money shot.

I love it. I look amazing.

Latin lover narrator: But that's not what Petra was looking at.

Rogelio's footage shows Scott so drunk, the bachelorettes were telling him to slow down. But he didn't.

He just said...

Maybe I'll go for a swim.

The cops said it's most likely an accidental drowning.

You starting to like me, Solano?

What?

'Cause you're working awful hard to help me if you're not.

Bad publicity for you is bad publicity for the Marbella.

That's all this is.

Darci (moans): Oh!

That oil is so slippery and delicious.

Can you rub it... even lower?

Rogelio: I should have never trusted you!

Darci: I didn't do anything!

Wow. It looks like we actually got in a fight.

Yeah.

Tripp pieced it together.

It works, I guess.

Oh, good. The show needs some more drama.

You guys were right.

I am factored back in!

You serious?

What changed?

Xo.

I realized she's never gonna forgive me.

So you know what? I'm done apologizing.

So I'm glad you sent that tape, to end things once and for all.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

Aha! I knew it!

I knew you did it!

Okay, you got me. I lied.

And here's the thing... I don't care.

(sighs) Darci, come on.

How did things get so bad between us?

I unfroze an egg, you had a panic attack and bailed.

Well, technically, that was not a panic attack.

Now, Jane has...

It defrosted!

I just didn't want to have a baby with you.

So you said.

Do you think it's easy for me to do this show?

I'm miserable.

But here's the silver lining.

Now I'm famous.

And fame...

It really does a great job of masking that empty feeling.

Well, I'm done, Darci.

You can't quit.

You signed a contract!

What's Papa apologizing to me for?

Jane: Don't worry about it.

Just take the gift and say thank you.

Can we color a little?

One page, then bedtime.

(panting softly)

A... giraffe.

(echoing): Mommy, are you okay?

(gasping)

Mommy? Mommy?

Oh.

Mommy?

Sorry, hon.

You had that face. Were you thinking about Michael?

A little, yeah.

How come now?

Well, I saw someone that was mean to him, and it made me mad.

Did you use your words?

You know, I really didn't.

You should.

You're right.

I will.

Oh, you.

(sniffles)

Okay. Mommy asked him to talk.

(phone chimes)

Latin lover narrator: Which brings us here... now. I know. I was expecting, like, a cafe or something.

Why are we here?

I figure if you're gonna keep hitting me, at least you can wear gloves.

Look, I just want to talk. I'm not gonna hit you again.

Fine. I just want to explain my side of the story.

When Michael passed away, I joined the department's investigation to...

No, you're right. I do want to hit you.

Give me those gloves.

Don't forget to practice.

I don't want to talk to you.

I know. I know.

I just wanted to tell you, I've been doing some soul searching, and I realize I've lost my way.

Yeah. No kidding.

I just want to go back to how things were before I became this crazy famous reality TV star, when I was just a simple internationally famous telenovela star.

And I'm gonna try to get back to that guy.

And he was honest.

And if I'm honest, I think I agreed to the cut because I was jealous.

You had just moved in with Bruce, and I think I wanted to hurt you.

And I'm so sorry.

Latin lover narrator: And from one troubled friendship to another. Oh, wow! Look at Jane! She's pummeling him! In her mind.

(bell dings)

In reality...

You are such a jerk!

I'm so mad at you.

Whoa.

No kicking.

Sorry.

I know you're mad.

Punch me back.

No.

You can use me and betray me... That's punching me!

I didn't use you.

You did!

I trusted you, and you went through Michael's stuff!

I had to.

What... you had to spy on him?

I was trying to clear his name.

The whole time, I was trying to clear his name.

I don't believe that.

It's true.

There was an investigation.

You didn't have to work it.

Would you want someone else to?

You could have told me!

I was trying to protect you.

I don't need protecting!

Not now, but then.

You were having panic attacks every day!

(bell dings)

I'm sorry, again.

Not your fault.

(sighs)

You're right.

I was in a different place then.

(sighs)

It just sucked, because you were the one person that I could talk to or could...

I don't know... Tell me new things about Michael, things I didn't know.

Hearing that he was a ball hog, or... what he said after our first date or whatever.

It just kept him alive a little.

I know.

Well, I'm here every Tuesday, if you ever get the urge to talk, or, you know, hit me again.

Maybe I will.

So should we talk about Scott?

Nah. We actually ruled it an accident this morning.

Really? 'Cause I had a list of, like, 50 suspects in mind.

Yep. The Marbella is totally off the hook.

The Fairwick, too.

Jane: That's great.

I'm so happy for you.

Oh. How is Mateo? Did he go down without a fight?

We went a few rounds, but Fuzzy Bunny finally talked him into it.

Oh, Fuzzy Bunny is such a creep.

(Funny Bunny voice): It hurts my feelings when you say that about me, Jane.

(laughs): Creepy.

(laughs)

Jane: Oh, that reminds me, I'm going to be a little late tomorrow picking him up.

I'm meeting Gary for breakfast.

I'm going to ply him with mimosas, and get him to come back to Chloe. Hmm?

Jane, stop.

Just come manage the lounge.

I can't.

Why? You'd be good at it.

Plus, you love everybody there.

I have to think long-term, career-wise.

This isn't about your career, this is just to buy time.

You don't know that.

What are you talking about?

You just got a book deal.

W-Which might not go anywhere.

What?

Hit books are few and far between.

And if it doesn't happen for me, then I'd be a lounge manager, as opposed to someone working in the publishing industry.

You're talking about if you fail.

I'm being practical.

What happened to following your dreams?

Well, y-you know, I...

I had a dream.

♪ ♪

Rafael: I know.

But you do have other ones.

And I won't let you get stuck in the lounge.

Okay?

Two years and you're out.

Promise?

Promise.

Because you'd want me to tell you if you were stuck.

Exactly.

You're stuck.

At work, you're basically Petra's bitch.

And I say that with full respect for Petra.

You're not gonna turn back into greedy, shady, amoral Rafael just because you care about the Marbella.

Greedy, shady, amoral Rafael?

Paraphrasing. Just think about it.

Latin love narrator: Which he did, for the record.

So just like that?

After a year of “you decide,” you want to start weighing in.

Yes. I'm ready.

Well, it's about time.

Abbey: See? I knew she'd be happy.

Latin lover narrator: Oh, God. Sorry, again. So embarrassing. I should look into this.

Well, he actually has good ideas sometimes.

Wow. High praise.

But he has to lose the beard, right?

Oh, absolutely.

Yeah.

It's a prerequisite.

I'm going back to telenovelas, Mateo.

You are too young to remember, but Papa played some epic roles.

So my next role needs to be even bigger.

Latin lover narrator: Or much, much, much smaller. But we're not there yet.

Ooh, it's my agent.

Hi, Barry.

Hi, Barry.

Oh.

I see.

Okay.

Thank you.

What's wrong?

It's nothing.

Tell me. I want to be factored in.

Hmm.

I'm being sued for $10 million for breach of contract.

That sounds bad. Can you send them a basket?

Latin lover narrator: If the basket is full of $10 million.

Sonia, can you cover six and seven for Joey until he gets back from break?

Yeah, no problem.

Thank you.

Latin lover narrator: Yep. Rocking that manager job. And in that instant, friends, Jane was reminded of Michael. And dare I say, it felt a little like a sign. The first in a long time.

(sighs)

Found it.

(chuckles)

Rafael: Okay.

Now that you've made it through your first day, I am officially giving you your one-year, 51-week, six-day notice.

That won't be necessary, because I will have quit in a blaze of glory by then, because I am a writer.

I have a book deal.

A messenger sent over the paperwork and everything.

Huh? (mimics explosion)

(squeals)

Petra: What's all this?

They're flowers.

It's what someone brings when he's taking someone else on a date, which is what I'm gonna do.

Just take your pants off.

You don't need to take me to dinner first.

(chuckles): No.

I want to go out.

A proper date.

Come on.

You wouldn't have tried to help my hotel if you didn't “like me” like me.

Fine.

Maybe I... “like you” like you.

You happy?

I'll pick you up at 7:00.

Latin lover narrator: Hmm. Looks like something's troubling Petra. I wonder what it could be. Sorry. I'm just being coy. I know what it is. I'll show you.

(thunder crashes)

Yep. Petra's been hiding something. And she's not the only one.

That was close.

It would've been bad for us if they'd ruled it a murder.

I know.

Latin lover narrator: Oh, dear. What the hell are you up to, Rafael?