The Bumpkin


 * In 25 yards, turn left.
 * Dad, why do we have to go to school?
 * So you can get a job.
 * But why do I need a job?
 * So you can earn money.
 * Continue ahead.
 * But why do I need money?
 * To buy the stuff that the TV makes us want.
 * But why do I need to buy stuff?
 * Because if you didn't buy stuff, everyone would be out of a job and no one would have any money.
 * Wait, so I have to work for the rest of my life to pay for stuff that I don't want, just so that everyone else can suffer the same horrible fate as me?
 * Exactly.
 * You just live your life without thinking don't you?
 * I believe you are underestimating me, son.
 * Turn right.
 * You have reached your destination.
 * Come on, surely there's more to life than that.
 * Hmmmmm nope.
 * Argh.
 * I believe you are underestimating me, son.
 * Turn right.
 * You have reached your destination.
 * Come on, surely there's more to life than that.
 * Hmmmmm nope.
 * Argh.
 * Hmmmmm nope.
 * Argh.

What's a TV?

 * I'm outta here, enjoy your pathetic lives working from 9 to 5, Hector send me to freedom.
 * That's it, laugh at me but at least I'm not a mindless zombie going through life doing what they tell me to.
 * Who?
 * You know, them!
 * Who's them?
 * You know, the man.
 * What man?
 * The man who tells you what to do!
 * Who? My dad?
 * No, Ughh, the people who tells you what to watch on TV and stuff.
 * What's...a TV?
 * Its a- Hmmm.
 * No, Ughh, the people who tells you what to watch on TV and stuff.
 * What's...a TV?
 * Its a- Hmmm.

The Way to Ultimate Happiness

 * You have reached your destination.
 * On ze menu today, poulet a la deep fried, accompanied by the fries of the French.  Mmm, délicieux.
 * What are the fries of the french?
 * Are you a potato?
 * As sure as the world is flat.
 * Who's the bumpkin?
 * This is Idaho, Gumball's friend from the country, he's gonna be staying with us this weekend.
 * Where's your chair?
 * Gumball threw it away, we are getting rid of our possessions to lead a simpler and better life.
 * What's going on here?
 * It's Idaho, he's gonna show us the way.
 * The way to what?
 * The way to ultimate happiness.
 * Is that a theme park?
 * No, it's a free world with no electricity, no cars, no supermarkets and especially no TV.
 * Hahahahaha, he's not joking is he?
 * It's Idaho, he's gonna show us the way.
 * The way to what?
 * The way to ultimate happiness.
 * Is that a theme park?
 * No, it's a free world with no electricity, no cars, no supermarkets and especially no TV.
 * Hahahahaha, he's not joking is he?
 * Hahahahaha, he's not joking is he?
 * Hahahahaha, he's not joking is he?

Activities

 * Ahhh, isn't it better to simply communicate rather than being brainwashed by the TV?
 * Dude, no one said a word for half an hour!
 * Nicole, punish Gumball for being boring!
 * I really want to, but I can't. Gumball is exploring his outlook on society and it is our job as parents to encourage that no matter how much we might think it's [angrily] COMPLETELY RIDICULOUS!
 * Heh heh, so what do you noble savages do to entertain your tribe?
 * We play rough and tumble.
 * What's that?
 * Come on, I will show you. Now the rules is there are no rules, you wrestle and make your friend tumble.
 * Wait, so you can like punch and stuff?
 * Well heh heh, well you can try but I have to warn you, I have never been defeated in Elmore County, come on.
 * Ahhhhh.
 * AHHHHHHHHH!
 * Darwin!
 * He said there were no rules!
 * You didn't have to kick him over a house!
 * I was defending myself!
 * Against what? You're like 8 times his size!
 * I panicked, OK?
 * Ha ha, do it again, do it again!
 * You know what we do when we need to cheer up, we sing songs! Aberdeen, in the wind! And the field potato.
 * Aberdeen, in the wind! And the field potato.
 * Ahhhhhhhh! Ah!
 * I hope the tooth fairy accepts change.
 * That's it, I've had it with your "alternative new age nonsense", it started boring and now it's painful, I'm going to the chicken place and get a family bucket of comfort food.
 * Look, we are at such freedom and it comes with a price, it's tough but it's beautiful, it's rough but it's real, it's dangerous but it's...it's-
 * It's a backyard, there is nothing dangerous around here. Wasp!
 * Darwin, don't blow it at me, blow it away!
 * I have never seen this much dancing since they invented the mashed potato.
 * Calm down guys, it's just a tiny insect, I will show you how to handle it. Hey wasp, how about you just go-  owwww, what the owwww, that stung me like a million times!
 * Suck the poison out and you will be just fine.
 * Ya, chill out people, it's only a wasp sting. Just gonna suck the poison out.  Ahhh.
 * That's not how you deal with a wasp sting.
 * I think I'm ready-
 * To go back inside?
 * No, to live in a forest.
 * I have never seen this much dancing since they invented the mashed potato.
 * Calm down guys, it's just a tiny insect, I will show you how to handle it. Hey wasp, how about you just go-  owwww, what the owwww, that stung me like a million times!
 * Suck the poison out and you will be just fine.
 * Ya, chill out people, it's only a wasp sting. Just gonna suck the poison out.  Ahhh.
 * That's not how you deal with a wasp sting.
 * I think I'm ready-
 * To go back inside?
 * No, to live in a forest.
 * I think I'm ready-
 * To go back inside?
 * No, to live in a forest.
 * No, to live in a forest.

Forage

 * Come on, to the forest of freedom, where we can pick ripe fruits off the laden trees and loot fresh fish from the teeming rivers, paying for nothing and living for freedom!
 * Ok. But where is it?
 * Wait, were you following me because- Ar, let's just forage around the neighborhood, it's as good as it sounds.
 * Wait, were you following me because- Ar, let's just forage around the neighborhood, it's as good as it sounds.

Meal

 * Ugh, is this what you eat everyday?
 * No, what I eat is healthier, it's the thing all food comes from and goes back too.
 * Discount supermarkets?
 * Nope, soil.
 * Ok...
 * Bah, this is disgusting, hey brain dude, can I spit?
 * Sorry tough guy, just man up and swallow it.
 * What, me and my boys are not digesting that.
 * Who are you calling boy stomach man, I'm five times the length of this body.
 * Pfft, forget it intestine, pfft I'm tired off you, pfft always pfft blowing pfft hot air.
 * Come on guys, can't we learn to love each other?
 * You are not supposed to eat the soil, you just rub it on youself to get the good things from.
 * Oh thank goodness, I felt like my stomach was gonna punch my brain.
 * You are not supposed to eat the soil, you just rub it on youself to get the good things from.
 * Oh thank goodness, I felt like my stomach was gonna punch my brain.
 * Oh thank goodness, I felt like my stomach was gonna punch my brain.

The Lifestyle

 * Ahh, how often we get to sit back and gaze at the stars?
 * And it's actually pretty comfortable out here.
 * Speak for yourself, sleeping on the ground is more painful, like your back being shredded by a million dirty claws.
 * I think you are sleeping on Gumball.
 * This new lifestyle might be a pain, but at least we finally get some time together as a family.
 * Thanks for showing us the way Idaho.
 * Ahhhhh.
 * Aaugh.
 * Arrr-
 * Shhhhh, I know what this looks like but before you tell me how wrong it is, don't you wanna try it?
 * Ughh, let's do it again.
 * Dude, wake up.
 * Arrr-
 * Shhhhh, I know what this looks like but before you tell me how wrong it is, don't you wanna try it?
 * Ughh, let's do it again.
 * Dude, wake up.
 * Ughh, let's do it again.
 * Dude, wake up.
 * Dude, wake up.
 * Dude, wake up.

Saving Idaho

 * What did you do to him?
 * Nothing, we just ate junk food and played video games.
 * That's it, his pure country body couldn't handle the all filthy suburban lifestyle, it sent him into toxic shock!
 * Wait, what were you doing playing video games, leaving us outside all night, you...you...you...
 * Hypocrite? I know, I'm sorry, I hated this whole lifestyle from the moment I turned off the TV.
 * Then why did you force us to keep it up?
 * Because I got principles, just turns out I can't live by them.
 * Wait a minute, he's a vegetable, he doesn't need a doctor, he needs a gardener, take him back to his home!
 * I- I- I-
 * Shhhh, I love you too, my friend.
 * I- I live about an hour away.
 * Awkward.
 * Dad, hurry up!
 * Ok, let's take a shortcut!
 * In 20 yards, turn left.
 * Give me all your money and don't try and call for help.
 * Call for help!
 * Continue straight.
 * Turn left.
 * Turn left.
 * I'm so sorry buddy, this is all my fault.
 * Agh, it's OK.
 * Hey, looks like he's getting better!
 * Aghh.
 * Dad, faster!
 * Turn left.
 * Turn left.
 * Turn right.
 * Going up?
 * I will take the next one.
 * , and : Ahhh!
 * What kind of shortcut is this? We're running out of time!
 * Don't worry honey, your father knows exactly what he's doing!
 * No, he doesn't!
 * Aghhh this satnav is broken, we've been everywhere apart from where we need to be!
 * What are you talking about-
 * We made it till another 3 minutes.
 * Are you Idaho's family? Please, you have to help him.
 * We were too late.
 * Aberdeen, in the wind, in the field, potato.
 * Ohhhhhh, ohhhhhh, ohhhhh.
 * Whooooooooo!
 * Idaho!
 * But how?
 * There's nothing a good old-fashioned dirt bath can't fix, I still don't know how you all can survive the life y'all city folks live.
 * I know, we're disgusting.
 * Oh well, that's potato's duty that help his neighbors, so why don't you stay here with us, do hard work in the fields and-
 * You have reached your destination.
 * No, he doesn't!
 * Aghhh this satnav is broken, we've been everywhere apart from where we need to be!
 * What are you talking about-
 * We made it till another 3 minutes.
 * Are you Idaho's family? Please, you have to help him.
 * We were too late.
 * Aberdeen, in the wind, in the field, potato.
 * Ohhhhhh, ohhhhhh, ohhhhh.
 * Whooooooooo!
 * Idaho!
 * But how?
 * There's nothing a good old-fashioned dirt bath can't fix, I still don't know how you all can survive the life y'all city folks live.
 * I know, we're disgusting.
 * Oh well, that's potato's duty that help his neighbors, so why don't you stay here with us, do hard work in the fields and-
 * You have reached your destination.
 * Ohhhhhh, ohhhhhh, ohhhhh.
 * Whooooooooo!
 * Idaho!
 * But how?
 * There's nothing a good old-fashioned dirt bath can't fix, I still don't know how you all can survive the life y'all city folks live.
 * I know, we're disgusting.
 * Oh well, that's potato's duty that help his neighbors, so why don't you stay here with us, do hard work in the fields and-
 * You have reached your destination.
 * Oh well, that's potato's duty that help his neighbors, so why don't you stay here with us, do hard work in the fields and-
 * You have reached your destination.
 * You have reached your destination.