The Console


 * Ahem.
 * What?
 * Remember your last birthday present?
 * How can I forget? My present was an IOU.
 * Well, I'm afraid I'm gonna need that back.
 * Really?
 * Because...
 * You got me a Game... ...Child?  Made in Chainor? This is such a knock-off even the country it was made in is a knock-off!  Did you buy it from the back of that van?
 * Yeah, the Awesome Store. What's the problem? Everything we have is a knock-off. Our TV? It's a Soppy. Only two letters different, but that never stopped you from watching it. Your superhero, Badman, he's a knock-off too. But you love his morally-dubious adventures. Even our doctor only has a doctorate in fine arts, but he did a great job on my appendix scar.
 * Okay, thungs.
 * What?
 * That's knock-off for thanks.
 * That's the spirit.
 * "Inverted paradox, the enemy within?" JRPG titles never make sense; They're just random words thrown together. The fashion equivalent would be wearing a Hawaiian shirt, ski boots and a top hat. Actually that does explain how the characters normally look.
 * Dad, your console's not working! Go to bathroom, attic, bedroom?
 * AHHHHHHHHhhhhh... Dude, what is going on!?
 * There you are! Sorry, I forgot your name.
 * Please enter name? I've trapped us inside a video game! AAAAWWESOOOOME!
 * Please, MYBUTT, tell me what is going on.
 * A foul curse has been released upon our town by MYBUTT.
 * You mean the gates of doom were opened by MYBUTT?
 * The fabric of the universe was ripped apart by MYBUTT.
 * MYBUTT has made quite a mess.
 * Surely this is gonna get old at some point.
 * Here's some healing ointment to help MYBUTT in the heat of battle!
 * Nope.
 * A foul curse has been released upon our town by MYBUTT.
 * You mean the gates of doom were opened by MYBUTT?
 * The fabric of the universe was ripped apart by MYBUTT.
 * MYBUTT has made quite a mess.
 * Surely this is gonna get old at some point.
 * Here's some healing ointment to help MYBUTT in the heat of battle!
 * Nope.
 * Surely this is gonna get old at some point.
 * Here's some healing ointment to help MYBUTT in the heat of battle!
 * Nope.

Outside

 * Oh no, the path is blocked by an awkwardly placed shrub! and we're apparently too stupid to walk on the lawn.
 * MYBUTT uses AXE. It is ineffective.
 * MYBUTT uses SAW. It is ineffective.
 * Can MYBUTT just use common sense and walk around it?
 * MYBUTT uses SARCASM. It is ineffective.
 * Pfft, I'm pretty sure I can handle a few le- Ow! Ow! Ow! Ah! Ek!
 * MYBUTT receives CRITICAL damage.
 * A leaf monster would be susceptible to fire attacks.
 * Yes, I think most things are susceptible to fire attacks
 * Woah! Yeah! Awesome!
 * Leslie? What happened to you?
 * I bought some fertilizer from THE AWESOME STORE. I went home after visiting the AWESOME STORE and used the fertilizer I'd just bought at THE AWESOME STORE but..
 * Okay! Okay! We got it, we got it. The awesome store is the villain.
 * THE AWESOME STORE..
 * MAKE IT STOP!
 * I can't! There's no command to skip through his cut scene.
 * DO SOMETHING!
 * Hold on!
 * We could of just walked away. But now maybe we should run.
 * What are we doing at Mr. Robinson's?
 * Getting loot.
 * I think you mean looting.
 * No, if there are items hidden in these pots, they must be for me.
 * No, I'm pretty sure the mailman hid them there so people like you wouldn't steal them.
 * No, that's how it works in RPGs. Whatever you find, you take.
 * I don't know. There was no *BUDABLING* sound when you took that VHS player. Right now it just feels like you're ransacking an old man's house.
 * I'm sure Mr. Robinson doesn't mind.
 * Welcome to my home. Please take whatever you need for your quest.
 * Hm. I'm gonna go sleep in his bed now.
 * What's with this new outfit? Can someone explain why this gigantic sword has a trigger?
 * Yeah, well you did reject the alternative outfit.
 * Yeah I don't think that was age appropriate.
 * But those leather platform boots would have given you plus five vision!
 * How?
 * {{D|Gumball}: Well, they make you taller, don't they?
 * Oh, that actually makes sense.
 * Welcome to my home. Please take whatever you need for your quest.
 * Hm. I'm gonna go sleep in his bed now.
 * What's with this new outfit? Can someone explain why this gigantic sword has a trigger?
 * Yeah, well you did reject the alternative outfit.
 * Yeah I don't think that was age appropriate.
 * But those leather platform boots would have given you plus five vision!
 * How?
 * {{D|Gumball}: Well, they make you taller, don't they?
 * Oh, that actually makes sense.
 * Oh, that actually makes sense.