RiOa / Thomas the Unstoppable Tank Engine

Blu: Great! My girlfriend's been kidnapped, and I'm the only bird in Rio that can't fly!

Alfred E. Neuman: (flapping hands like a bird) Whee!

Blu: Make that the only thing in Rio that can't fly. (Just then, a meteor flies as Blu gasps) A shooting star! (he closes his eyes) I wish I could fly. (he opens his eyes) Wait, that's not a shooting star!

(Camera zooms in, revealing Abin Sur plummeting to his demise)

Abin Sur: AAAAAAHHHH!!!

BOOM!

(Scene goes to front of Blu, revealing a sign saying "Alien Crash Site - 50 Miles".)

Blu: Couldn't land closer, huh?

(Scene goes to Abin Sur and Hal Jordan)

Abin Sur: The ring has chosen you, Hal Jordan.

(Camera zooms in on Jordan)

Abin Sur: It will allow you to fly.

Hal Jordan: Fly?! That's awesome; I always wanted to fly- oomph!

(A shovel knocks Hal)

(Scene goes to Blu with the shovel)

Blu: Get in line, buddy! I need this more than you.

(Scene goes to Blu picking up the ring)

(Blu puts on the ring)

(Blu looks at the ring)

(Blu is suddenly beamed away)

(Scene goes to Blu in space, still flying)

Blu: Aaaaaahhh!!

(Blu goes to orange planet with green lights)

(Scene goes to the title card Rio but the "O" turns into the Green Lantern ring and a green lowercase "a" joining and makes the title to RiOa)

(Blu lands on a platform, a nanospray changes Blu's color to the Green Lantern Corps scheme)

Guardian #1: Welcome to Oa, Hal Jordan of-- Whoa! I think Hal's been eaten by a chicken.

Blu: I'm a macaw.

Guardian #2: Something's wrong! The ring would never choose a bird.

Tomar-Re: Uh, hello? I resent that. But seriously, are you gonna eat that cracker?

Guardian #1: (points to gumball machine full of rings) The ring is reserved for important matters.

Blu: Flying is important, especially to birds who can't do it. So seek them out. (Knocks down machine)

Guardians #1 & #2: (gasp)

(Rings rise and fly to planet Earth)

(The screen shows Kermit the Frog and Big Bird. A ring hits Big Bird's head and lands in his hand.)

BAM!

Big Bird: Hey, a ring!

(Big Bird zooms away)

WHOOSH!

Kermit the Frog: Ohh! But I'm the green one!

(A ring lands in front of Mordecai and Rigby)

Mordecai: A Green Lantern ring? Heh, heh, I know where we're headed!

Mordecai and Rigby: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-A!

(Mordecai zooms away)

Rigby: Huh. I guess they can only carry one at a time. I'll wait.

(A ring lands in a pile of bird seed)

(Whoosh)

(Road Runner snacks on the bird seed)

Road Runner: Meep Meep!

(Road Runner flies away... dropping a green-glowing anvil on top of Wile E. Coyote)

Blu: Everyone, I've summoned you here to create a new Green Lantern CAW'! Uh, I'm sorry. It's Corps (pronounced "core"). Green Lantern Corps. The point being, the love of my life is being held against her will. So I need you all to take the oath.

Birds: In brightest day, in blackest night.

Despite our shape, our size, our height.

We're birds who walk, which isn't right.

But starting now, we will take flight! WOO-HOO!

(The group takes off)

Rigby: Yep, should be coming back for me, any time now.

(Cut to Shady's Warehouse)

Nigel: Gonna get a pretty penny for you, princess.

(Birds crash in wall)

Blu: Step away from her, Nigel, or else.

Nigel: Or else what?

Blu: Show him what you can do, Mumble.

(Mumble tap dances)

Blu: I meant the ring.

Mumble: Oh, the ring, right, right, right.

(Mumble summons a shoe, which almost crushes Nigel)

Nigel: Aaaahhh!!! (moves away from the shoe as it was about to crush him)

Big Bird: Not so fast, Birdy!

(Big Bird summons Oscar the Grouch, who crushes Nigel between trash can lids)

(Marcel comes in)

Marcel: Nigel, what is the...huh? Green Lanterns! Ha! Luckily, your rings don't work on yellow.

(He zips his yellow jacket, but Mordecai comes to him and punches him in the face, easily defeating him)

POW!

Mordecai: Hmm, hmm.

(Blu summons a key that unlocks the cage with Jewel)

Jewel: You did it, Blu! You saved me and learned to fly! That ring can do anything!

Blu: You're not kidding. How else do you think a movie like Rio made so much money?

(Money comes out of Blu's ring and covers up the screen)

(Segment ends)

Narrator: It was a lovely day on the Island of Sodor, the air was crisp, (scene goes to Thomas and Sir Topham Hatt) and there wasn’t a cloud in the sky.

Sir Topham Hatt: Thomas, I'm giving you a much-needed tune-up, my friend.

Narrator: said Sir Topham Hatt.

Thomas: Oh, boy! Thanks!

Sir Topham Hatt: Now as soon as I put your brakes back in, you'll be as good as new.

(Sir Topham Hatt slaps Thomas... accidentally getting him rolling.)

Thomas: Wait, why am I rolling? Am I moving or are the tree's moving? What did you say about my brakes? You took out my what?! Holy cow, I can't stop!

Sir Topham Hatt: (sighs) Clearly, this is why I don't have real friends.

(Scene goes to Thomas going fast)

Thomas: (Shouting)''' LOOK OUT!!! I HAVE NO BRAKES!!'''!

(Camera zooms in on Thomas)

Narrator: ...screamed Thomas. And indeed...

(Scene goes to back of Thomas going fast)

Narrator: ...he did not.

(Scene resumes to the title card, Thomas the Unstoppable Tank Engine)

(Scene goes to Sir Topham Hatt and Frank Barnes in a control room)

Frank Barnes: Alright, talk to me.

Sir Topham Hatt: Well, it seems Thomas is out of control and we can't stop him!

(Scene goes to Thomas going fast)

Thomas: WHY CAN'T I STOP?!?!

(Camera zooms above to Harold the Helicopter)

Harold: This is Harold the Helicopter. How can I help you?

Narrator: asked Harold.

Frank Barnes: Harold, this is Control.

(Scene goes back to Sir Topham Hatt and Frank Barnes in the control room)

Frank Barnes: I need you to shoot at Thomas and derail him from the track.

(Scene goes back to Harold)

Harold: "Shoot at Thomas"? Why, I couldn’t! Thomas is my friend!

(Scene goes back to Sir Topham Hatt and Frank Barnes in the control room)

Frank Barnes: Well, your "friend" is about to crash head-first into a nearby town!

(Frank takes off his headphones)

Frank Barnes: (Groans) This is why I never work with talking machines! Well, it's like they say: never send a smiley helicopter to do an action star's work.

(Camera zooms in on Sir Topham Hatt)

Sir Topham Hatt: Nobody says that!

Frank Barnes: What's his cargo?

Sir Topham Hatt: Pardon?

Frank Barnes: Thomas! His cargo! What's he carrying?!

(Camera zooms in on Sir Topham Hatt)

Sir Topham Hatt: Oh, nothing too dangerous: pillows, soft cheeses, a nuclear bomb...

(Camera zooms to Frank)

Frank Barnes: A nuclear bomb?!

(Camera zooms back to Sir Topham Hatt)

Sir Topham Hatt: ... AND soft cheeses! Sheesh, were you even listening?

(Camera zooms out to both Sir Topham Hatt and Frank Barnes)

Frank Barnes: Alright, come on. I've got a train to catch!

(Camera zooms in on Sir Topham Hatt as Frank Barnes walks away)

Sir Topham Hatt: Oh ho, that's just terrible!

(Scene goes to Lightning McQueen and Mater driving on a road)

Mater: I like this scene, McQueen!

Lightning McQueen: See, Mater? It's good to travel the world.

(Lightning and Mater go onto a level crossing... and Thomas crashes them while still going)

(Scene goes back to Thomas going fast)

Thomas: I'm sorry about that! I'm unstoppable! It's a medical condition!

(Scene goes outside to Sir Topham Hatt, Frank Barnes, and Percy)

Frank Barnes: I gotta partner with him?!

(Camera zooms in on Sir Topham Hatt and Frank Barnes)

Frank Barnes: I told you! I work alone!

(Camera zooms back out to Sir Topham Hatt, Frank Barnes, and Percy)

Percy: I like you.

(Camera zooms back in to Sir Topham Hatt, Frank Barnes and Percy)

Sir Topham Hatt: Look, nobody knows the rails better than Percy.

Frank Barnes: Fine.

(Camera goes to Percy while Frank walks to him)

Frank Barnes: Just try to keep up, Junior!

Percy: You're a nice man.

(Scene goes to Thomas about to fall off the tracks)

Thomas: (Screams) Somebody help me!

(Camera zooms above to Harold, raining lead at Thomas with his mounted autogun)

(Scene goes back to Thomas going fast)

Thomas: Harold, what are you doing?!

(Scene goes back to Harold)

Harold: (Ceases fire) I'm sorry, Thomas! I have propellers to feed!

(Harold resumes shooting)

(Scene goes to Frank Barnes on Percy)

Frank Barnes: What's that crazy chopper doin'?!

(Scene goes to the front of Percy)

Frank Barnes: Doesn’t he know if he hits that bomb, we're doomed?!

Percy: I like clouds.

(Scene goes back to Frank Barnes)

Frank Barnes: Yeah, ain't that the truth?

(Scene goes back to the front of Percy)

Frank Barnes: You know, you and I aren't so different after all.

(Scene goes back to the back of Percy)

Frank Barnes: (gasps)

(Scene goes to the back of Thomas with Frank Barnes in the picture)

Frank Barnes: I see Thomas. Step on it!

(Scene goes to the front of Thomas and the back of Percy about to latch onto Thomas' freight)

Frank Barnes: Thomas! We're coming!

Thomas: Hurry! Oh!

(Harold continues shooting)

(Camera zooms in on Thomas)

Thomas: (gasps)

(Scene goes to and then zooms into an "END" sign)

(Scene goes to Percy and Frank latching to the back of Thomas' freight and pulling the brakes to slow him down and stop)

(Scene goes to Thomas slowing down and stopping in front of the "END" sign. Is that a close call or what?)

Thomas: Oh, thank goodness!

(Camera zooms out to Thomas and Frank Barnes)

Thomas: If you hadn’t stopped me, I would have crushed the little town of Strawberry Shortcake!

(Camera goes to town of Strawberry Shortcake)

(Scene goes to Frank Barnes as he slaps Thomas)

(Scene goes out to Thomas and Frank with Thomas rolling)

Thomas: What the--? Why am I--?

(Crashes and screams from the Strawberry Shortcake characters can be heard)

Percy: Oh!

Narrator: And nobody regretted any of their choices. The end.

(Segment ends)

5-second Cartoon
(5-second Cartoon segment begins with Rigby at the Park, still waiting for Oa to beam him up.)

Rigby: Yep, any time now.