The Alchemist Returns

1 (THEME SONG PLAYING) I got the wind in my hair and a fire within 'Cause there's something beginning I got a mystery to solve and excitement to spare That beautiful breeze blowing through I'm ready to follow it who knows where I'll get there, I swear With the wind in my hair - Good morning, Princess. - Beautiful day. Someone's in a hurry. Gesundheit, m'lady. You lied to me. Rapunzel, I just heard what happened in Old Corona. I I assure you my intent was only to protect you From what? Your own men? It's time for answers, Dad. I want to know why you lied about Old Corona, and why you've been covering up the fact that our kingdom is being destroyed by those black rocks. What are you trying to hide? I'm sorry, my dear, I did not want to lie to you. but you are not ready for the truth. Oh, Dad, we are beyond what I am and not ready for. People are in danger! Rapunzel! I am the king, and I have the situation under control. (SIGHS) You know, you are not the first person to lie to me and tell me I am not ready for the real world. (DOOR SLAMS) (PASCAL GRUMBLES) So, I guess it's a pretty safe bet that Corona won't be hosting a daddy-daughter dance anytime soon? (LAUGHS) (SQUEAKS) Yeah, sorry, not the time for jokes. (SIGHS) I'm not sure what's going on, but I know Corona's in some kind of danger, and I feel like I'm the only one who wants to do anything about it. No, no, you're not. Listen, Blondie, no matter what we're up against, I'm with you all the way. I know, thank you, I just (SIGHS) I think I need some time alone. Understood. You know things do seem pretty dark right now, but if anyone can find a light, it's you. I've got a feeling everything's gonna be okay. STAN: Quit being so mean, Pete! Wait! All I said was your breath smells like tree-rot, you are a sub-standard croquet player, and previous instances where I asserted you had a lovely singing voice were patently false. (GASPS) (GASPS) You've always loved my voice! Pete! What are you doing? Stan's your best friend! I know, I can't help it! It's like I I have to say whatever's on my mind! Oh, yeah? Well, you have cookie crumbs on your cheek. (SOBBING) Stan, wait! I'm sorry! You've got enough on your plate, Blondie. Go get some rest. I'll handle this. (SIGHS) (WA MUSIC PLAYING) Rapunzel, there you are! Dad, what it all this? Look, darling, I feel horrible about the way we left things, and, well, I'm hoping to make it up to you. Oh, Dad, I'm so relieved to hear that Ah! (PEOPLE SCREAMING) Oh! (PANTING) (GROANS) (PANTING) Cassandra! Eugene! RAPUNZEL: Oh! (PANTING) Stop running, Rapunzel. (GASPS) Face your destiny, or all you hold in your heart will be in grave danger. Uh (SQUEAKING) No, Pascal! Oh! (GASPS FOR AIR) Oh, Pascal! I would never do anything to hurt you. Come on. (HARBOR BELLS RINGING) (SEAGULL CAWS) (SIGHS) I don't know, Pascal, I don't even know what to do anymore. (SQUEAKS) Yeah, I know. There's always a way. I just have to find it. (OMINOUS MUSIC) (LOUD THUD) Did you hear something? - Ah! - (CHITTERING) Oh! Ruddiger! Where did you come from? Shh. Oh, Varian! Where have you been? I-I-I've been so worried about you. Yeah, uh, I've had to lie low. A funny thing, the people of Corona aren't too keen on guys who attack their princess. Attack me? You mean during the storm? You came for help. And you got to see why I needed your help. (GASPS) Varian You had to save the kingdom, you did what you had to, but you can help me now, Rapunzel. Do you have the scroll? The scroll! I-I-I got it, like you asked. I have no idea what it is, but my dad was desperate to keep it from me. (SIGHS) Now, it took me a while to translate this old language, but from what I can tell, those black rocks are actually some kind of of ancient darkness. Its destructive power can only be stopped by its counterpart, the sun-drop. Rapunzel! The the flower! You mean the flower? The one that healed me mom and gave me my hair? But my dad said it was long gone. Hmm. Would you say your dad has been really a reliable source or information? Well, um No, Rapunzel! No, it's still here. I'm sure of it. Your dad wouldn't just throw away something that could wield that kind of power. A single petal from that flower would solve all of our problems. That's all we need! Yeah, but even if the flower is here, I don't think we can just ask my dad to hand it over. Oh, I know we can't, which is why we have to steal it. It can be hard to look away from shiny things, huh, buddy? The royal chef just told me my ears were too big for my head! (LAUGHS) What? No It's just your head's too small for your ears. No, no, seriously, people are acting really strange. Then you're gonna love this. Huh? I once dropped the king's Ã©clair on the floor, but gave it to him anyway. Uh-oh! I stole half these medals from the supply cabinet. Uh-oh. (BRITISH ACCENT) People are often impressed by my regal accent, but the truth is, (AMERICAN ACCENT) I really sound like this. Oh! Yeah, we might wanna look into this. (PASCAL SQUEAKS) Ah! Princess, what are we doing here? The flower would most likely be in the royal vault, - and that is on the other - Other side of the castle, I know. But if we want to get past the vault security, our best bet is to use the underground tunnels, and Herz de Sonne's journal has a complete map of them. (SIGHS) (PASCAL SQUEAKS) (SIGHS) What am I doing? Rapunzel, you got what we came for. Come on, let's go! Taking the journal, stealing the flower Varian, these are all acts of treason. This may be my dad's only hope. This may be Corona's only hope. Rapunzel, Corona needs our help. For Corona. Come on. Blondie, what you doing? Doing? Uh, I wasn't doing anything? - What do you got there? - What? Nothing nothing! (SQUEAKS) Right okay. I know you want to be alone, but Cass and I, we (NERVOUS LAUGHTER) You okay? Mm-hmm! Rapunzel? Eugene, how far would you go to find the truth? Personally not very far. Frankly, the truth's not all it's cracked up to be. Blondie, you sure you're all right? Yeah, sorry. I just, I've had a lot to process lately. I promise I'll talk when I'm ready, okay? Okay. Just let me know if you need anything. Uh, Blondie? Hmm I found the entrance! Down here! (GRUNTS) (CHITTERING) We have to go this way. (RUDDIGER CHITTERING) Um that way? Wow Oh, oh! These tunnels depict an ancient technology of pre-Corona-era (SCREAMS) (WHIMPERING) Uh yeah, this way. We've gotta be careful. Herz der Sonne's tunnels may have long been forgotten, but that doesn't mean they're not dangerous. They are lined with deadly booby traps. (LAUGHS) As you can recall, I know a thing or two about booby traps. - Varian, watch out! - Huh? Oh! Whoa! Well, that's one down. (PASCAL GRUMBLES) Uh-oh! Huh (RUMBLING) (SCREAMS) We're gonna get squished! Ah! Ah! (RUMBLING) (SCREAMS) Pascal, wedge this into the axle to stop it from turning. Hurry! (METAL CREAKING) (SQUEAKS) Oh! Good. Now, go behind the wall to find some sort of release mechanism. (METAL CREAKING) (SHRIEKS) Pascal! Ah! Oh! Pascal, do something! Hurry! Ah! Whoa! Whoa! Ahh! (METAL CREAKING) - (SQUEAKS) - Pascal, you did it! I think I'm gonna be sick. (CROWD CHATTERING) How dare you point out my obvious flaws with cutting accuracy? I'll box your ears! You take that back! I don't care how true it is! Let's see you speak your truths with a mouth full of strudel! This is getting out of hand. Yeah, this reminds me of Xavier's mood potion, only now, everyone can't help but tell the truth. Out of my way, Big Ears. (COUGHS) Except for that guy. He had no idea what he's talking about. If this is some kind of truth potion, we have to figure out how it got into the castle. Who was the first person you noticed being a little too honest? - Hmm - Okay, Pete let's start at the beginning. Walk us through your day. And relax, just tell us what happened. Well, I woke up confused, because my mouth tasted like beans, but I had no recollection of eating beans the day prior. Then I saw my cat, and I said, "Hello, Mr. Happy-Paws"! Who's a fluffernutter? - Of course, he can't talk. - (EXASPERATED SIGHS) Tripwire. (SQUEAKS) Pascal, no! I need you to carefully let go of that spider. BOTH: Phew! Phew! - (WIRE SNAPS) - (CHITTERS) (RUMBLING) Watch it! (SIGHS) Oh Everyone okay? We're getting closer to the surface. We don't want to alarm the guards. Oh, I'm pretty sure they and everyone else have their hands full. - (SNICKERS) - Huh? What do you mean? N-nothing. Uh, it's just, um, they have their hands full every day! (LAUGHS) Corona, you know? Busiest kingdom on earth! - Whoa! Whoa! Oh! - Varian! Hang on! Way ahead of you! (GROANING) (LOUD RUMBLING) - What do we do? - I'm gonna go with run! I got into work, high-fived Stan, and I noticed his hand was sweaty, - Gah! Aah! - Oh, boy! - You are scary! - Listen, we've been here for 30 minutes, and all you've been doing is boring us with useless information! Useless! I gave you my recipe for strawberry scones! That was the most useless part! Okay, okay, okay, okay, let's try this. Can you recall anything out of the ordinary? Maybe something not soul-crushingly boring? Well, I did find the man in the bush who gave me purple cookies a bit peculiar. (SCOFFS) You think you might have led with that? Everybody's been eating these things! Don't! Someone may have laced them with some kind of truth serum. Listen, Pete, what else can you tell us about the man in the bush? Well, let's see, his voice was kind of squeaky? Oh, and he was asking about the sun-drop flower, which the king has been secretly hiding in the vault ever since he used it on the queen. Wait, wait, wait the sun-drop flower? So someone with a squeaky voice trying to keep a low profile used a potion to get information about a magical flower. Sound like anyone we know? Varian! So that's why Rapunzel was acting so peculiar. Come on, she might be in trouble! (PANTING) (CHITTERING) Come on, guys! This way! Whoa! (GRUNTING) (PANTING) That was too close. You are sure this flower is worth it, right? It's Corona's only hope? It should be, but, uh, I'm not really concerned about Corona. (GASPS) You don't care about Corona? Uh, I mean, of course I'm concerned about Corona, I love Corona, I just meant, right now I'm really concerned about how it's gonna help my dad. Corona, too! Out of the way, boys! We need to get into the vault and get the sun-drop flower! Sun-drop flower? Why, whatever do you mean? Oh I heard the sun-drop flower was destroyed We know the secret Let us in! The princess could be in grave danger! (OUT OF BREATH) Oh, it's a dead-end. No, this is it. We are right under the vault. Do you see that trap-door? Yeah, how do we get it open? Hmm One two three four five six seven Seven pillars. Huh. (MECHANICAL WHIRRING) (AIR BLOWING) (THUNDERING FOOTSTEPS) Uh, Varian? Fascinating! I believe this is an automaton, a marvel of ancient technology, really. - I've heard about them, but to see one - Varian! Look out! Don't worry, princess, I've got this. (GRUNTS) (EXPLOSION) (GRUNTS) See? I told ya! I got this Uh, Varian? (SCREAMS) Oh Despite the excruciating pain and the fact I am about to pass out, the science at work here is spellbinding! We're gonna need some kind of a plan if we're gonna defeat that thing. Uh hey, you! - Metal-head! - Automaton! Come and get it! Distract him and draw him towards you! (EXPLOSION) (POWERING DOWN) Come on, let's go! VARIAN: Hmm GUARD: Sorry, strict orders from the king. No one is permitted beyond this point. Let's ask ourselves a question, shall we? Whose wrath would you rather face, the king's, or hers? (KNUCKLES CRACK) (STRIKES MATCH) There it is! The flower! Varian! Wait, wait, wait! You said you were just gonna take one petal? But what if one petal's not enough to harvest what I need? - Varian! - What difference does it make? It's just sitting here, rotting, anyway! (GASPS) That flacon That had Xavier's mood potion in it. Varian, that potion is dangerous. You shouldn't be fooling with it! There was just one drop left, but it was enough for me to replicate and modify. I had to be sure the flower was here. So you made a truth serum and gave it to everyone? (LAUGHS) You'd be surprised what people will tell you for a cookie. (GASPS) Pete? Stan? How could you? Oh, do you honestly expect me to be concerned about the welfare of Corona? - But you said you - Rapunzel! I used you! I've been to you, and this kingdom, for help. Everyone turned their back on me! It has to be this way. I defied a direct order from my father, the king, because I trusted you. We both broke the law. Give me the flower, Varian. We can find a way to fix all of this, the rocks, your dad, everything. I promise you. I promise! Just this is not the way. Please? (DOORS RATTLING) Sorry, Princess, but I know firsthand how well you keep promises. - (DOORS RATTLING) - There he is! Get him! (COUGHING) Rapunzel, are you okay? (COUGHING) I'm fine Varian! (TOWER BELL RINGING) The royal medic said the effects of the potion will wear off on their own, eventually. Hey, everything's gonna be okay. Really? I broke the law, I stole from my own father, and committed treason! (SIGHS) And you know what the worst part is? I let the most powerful object in all of the land fall into the hands of I don't even know what he is anymore. But I know we haven't seen the last of him. (MECHANICAL WHIRRING) Work! Work! Please, work! No No, no, no! No! This is useless! It's like it no longer holds the sun-drop's power! RAPUNZEL: You mean the flower? The one that healed my mom and gave me my hair? VARIAN: The rocks are demonstrating an actual physical response to you. The sun-drop isn't the flower anymore It's Rapunzel!