Ghosts 'R' Us

Ghosts R Us

Submitted by James Porter

(Open to scene of a scary forest.)

Princess: OOGTAR! OOGTAR!

(Mario and co. walk onscreen.)

Princess: Where could that lost cave kid be? It's like we've been searching the enchanted forest for hours.

Mario: Ah don't worry Princess, we'll find little Oogtar. It's almost past his bedtime.

Yoshi: Oh kooey buddy spookity scary, Yoshi hope there's no ghosts in 'chanted forest.

Mario: Ah don't be afraid little buddy, there isn't a ghost in sight, right Luigi?

Luigi: That's right Mario.

(Luigi bumps into a blue figure and looks up at it.)

Everyone except Luigi: *gasp*

Luigi: Yikes!

(The figure turns around and is a Magikoopa.)

Luigi: Phew, I thought you were a ghost.

Princess: Look out Luigi, it's the most feared Koopa wizard of all, Wizenhiemer.

Magikoopa: That's Wizardhiemer.

(Wizardhiemer raises his wand and lightning flashes but doesn't strike it.)

Everyone: *gasp*

Yoshi: Ooga, Yoshi boogie!

(Yoshi runs away.)

Princess: Yoshi's running away!

Mario: Hey what's the big idea, wizard wise guy, scaring everybody?!

WIzardhiemer: This is my enchanted forest, whoever enters it becomes my prisoners! Now, plunge yourselves into that warp pipe.

Princess: No way, that warp pipe leads to a haunted house.

Mario: Yeah, you can't make us.

Princess: Yeah, we're not afraid of you!

Wizardhiemer: Well how do you feel about Bob-ombs? Bob-ombs.

(A Bob-omb appears in his hand.)

Luigi: Those we're not so crazy about!

(Luigi, Mario, and the princess dive into the pipe and Wizardhiemer follows them. Meanwhile somewhere else in the enchanted forest Yoshi finally stops running and sits down.)

Yoshi: Oh, Yoshi big fraidy cat. Run away from Princess and Mario friends when they need him.

???: AAAAAEEEAAAEEEAAAAAAEEEAAAEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!

(The trees begin to move.)

Yoshi: Now Yoshi more afraid then ever. Yoshi wish he wasn't alone.

(Tree moves again.)

???: AAAAAEEEAAAEEEAAAAAAEEEAAAEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!

Yoshi: Oh, now Yoshi change mind. Yoshi wish he was alone.

(Yoshi continues running.)

???: Me king of jungle, AAAAAEEEAAAEEEAAAAAAEEEAAAEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!

(Oogtar swings to the ground and picks up a rope.)

Oogtar: Oogtar capture Yoshi.

(Oogtar forms a lasso with the rope and chases Yoshi with it.)

Yoshi: Oh, food.

(Yoshi eyes a pack of Piranha Plants and looks back at Oogtar.)

Yoshi: Oh, too bad Yoshi can't stop for snack.

(Yoshi jumps over the Piranha Plants but when Oogtar does it he gets caught by a plant.)

Oogtar: Dino bunga, heeeeeeeeelp!

(Yoshi looks back and sees Oogtar caught by a plant.)

Yoshi: Oogtar! Why you scare Yoshi?

Oogtar: Oogtar sorry, Oogtar be plant food, Oogtar goner, help Oogtar quick!

Yoshi: Yoshi rescue Oogtar.

(Yoshi licks up the Piranha Plant that held Oogtar in it.)

Yoshi: Mmm, Yoshi get snack after all.

Oogtar: Woah. Yoshi eat Piranha Plant. Dino dude radical cool.

Yoshi: Urp. Scoos me.

Oogtar: You scoozed. Yoshi save Oogtar from Piranha Plants. Yoshi Oogtar's friend again?

Yoshi: Oogtar Yoshi's friend, Marios and Princess worried about Oogtar. Why Oogtar lost?

Oogtar: Oogtar king of jungle, Oogtar not lost, Oogtar just... not sure where he is.

Yoshi: [unknown] and Princess get captured by koopa wizard because of Oogtar.

Oogtar: Worry not dino dude. Oogtar help rescue friends.

(Oogtar and Yoshi run through the forest. Dissolve to the scene of a haunted house.)

Wizardhiemer: Welcome to the dungeon of my haunted house, plumb scum.

(Change to scene of a dungeon with the Marios chained up in it.)

Mario: You'll never get away with this Wiseacher!

Wizardhiemer:T hat's Wizardhiemer, Wizzardhiemer!

Mario: Wizen-whatever.

Princess :We never did anything to you, why are you holding us prisoner?

Wizardhiemer: Because I'm an evil Koopa wizard, I don't need a reason to mean and nasty, it's my nature.

(Wizardhiemer climbs a flight of stairs.)

Luigi: Well I'm afraid he's got a point there Princess.

Wizardhiemer: Besides, I like having visitors over to, hang around, he he ha ha ha ha ha.

(Wizardhiemer opens a door and enters it.)

Wizardhiemer: He he ha ha ha ha ha.

Luigi: We're chopped like hairballs in a, lint filter.

Mario: Only Yoshi can save us now.

(Dissolve back to scene of Yoshi and Oogtar walking through the enchanted forest.)

Yoshi: There warp pipe. Oh Yoshi hope there no ghosts inside.

Oogtar: Oogtar not afraid of ghosts. Oogtar not afraid of anything.

(A caterpillar appears from a bush.)

Yoshi: Eeeeehhhhhh!

Oogtar: Cave caterpillar!

(The caterpillar sees and approaches them.)

Oogtar: Oogtar know hungry smile when he see one, run for it dino dude!

(Oogtar grabs Yoshi and runs.)

Yoshi: Oogtar tell Yoshi he not afraid of anything. Why Oogtar run?

Oogtar: Oogtar not afraid, Oogtar not run, Oogtar jogging for health.

Yoshi: Jogging good for health?

Oogtar: Is when being chased by giant hungry Oogtar-eating caterpillar.

(The caterpillar is still persuing Yoshi and Oogtar.)

Yoshi: Sheo munga caterpillar gaining on Yoshi and Oogtar! Stop, I fix him.

Oogtar: No way dino dude, right now Oogtar would trade entire rock collection for one can of bug spray.

(Oogtar continues running and a block appears ahead of him.)

Yoshi: Look Oogtar. Magic flying block.

(Yoshi runs ahead of Oogtar and hits the block. A pair of magic wings pop out of it, and Yoshi grabs the wings.)

Yoshi: Magic wings make Yoshi fly like dino birdie, Oogtar ride.

Oogtar: Yippee kye yay man!

(Oogtar hops on Yoshi's back and when the caterpillar goes to bite him Yoshi goes into the air. On the ground the caterpillar pounds it's chest like King Kong or Tarzan, and Yoshi flies down and eats it in the air.)

Yoshi: Mmm yum, Yoshi jacuum caterpillar.

Oogtar: Way to bug off man, why no eat him before Oogtar running?

Yoshi: Oogtar no stop, that why.

Oogtar: Ooga awsome.

Yoshi: Now Yoshi and Oogtar find warp pipe where friends disappear.

(Yoshi lands next to a warp pipe, Oogtar hops off, and Yoshi loses his wing power.)

(Oogtar looks inside.)

Oogtar: This pipe leads to Wizenhiemer's digs. Happinin' place man.

Yoshi: Then if wizard meanie capture friends he takem there, let's boogie.

(Oogtar hops into the pipe and Yoshi follows him. Change to scene of them coming out of a pipe outside Wizardhiemer's haunted home.)

Yoshi: Ooooh, Oogtar no tell Yoshi that Koopa wizard live in haunted house.

(Yoshi hides behind a tree.)

Yoshi:Yoshi not go in there, Yoshi too scared, mucho ghosts inside

Oogtar: Yoshi wait here, Oogtar not fraidy cat, Oogtar eat ghosts for breakfast.

(Oogtar walks up to the door and knocks on it until Wizardhiemer opens it.)

Wizardhiemer: Wadd'ya want you prehistoric punk?

Oogtar: Oogtar come to rescue Princess and plumbers, take Oogtar to dungeon.

(Wizardhiemer makes a barely noticable smirk.)

Wizardhiemer: Whatever you say cave rat.

(Wizardhiemer teleports Oogtar to his dungeon.)

Yoshi: Oh no, Koopa wizard magic Oogtar.

(Oogtar appears in a set of dungeon chains next to the Marios and the Princess.)

Oogtar: Ooga bummer man.

Princess: Oogtar, we've been looking all over for you.

Oogtar: Me come to rescue you.

Luigi: Great, but who's gonna rescue you?

(Change to scene of Yoshi still hiding behind the tree.)

Yoshi: All of Yoshi's friends are koopanapped, now only Yoshi can rescue.

(Yoshi approaches the haunted house.)

Yoshi: Yoshi must find other way into haunted house, so Koopa wizard don't get him too.

(Yoshi eyes a triangle block underneath a window.)

Yoshi: Triangle block. Ooh I so scared, Yoshi never go inside haunted house before. I gotta be brave and find my friends. I go up triangle block.

(Yoshi jumps on the block to the second floor window and the song Wizard begins.) [Lyrics added by Hip.]

You walk on tiptoe Afraid of every sound You can't believe it This house is filled with fear Creepy shadows Follow you somehow Look, there's a monster He's after you right now There's a wizard Here tonight Don't walk into the darkness or some evil thing might grab us There's a wizard Here tonight Let's hope we only get out of haunted house of fright Wizard

(During the song Yoshi tiptoes through a room and is chased down a hall by a group of ghosts. Yoshi looks at them a couple of times and they stop moving and cover their eyes until Yoshi looks away. Yoshi traps them in a room and is chased down a hallway by a Big Boo. Yoshi enters the dungeon and the song ends.)

Wizardhiemer: Mwa ha ha ha ha ha!

(Wizardhiemer shoots Yoshi but Yoshi avoids the shot.)

Wizardhiemer: You rediculous runt of a reptile, I won't miss again. Take this lizard lips.

Oogtar: Use your tongue dino dude!

Yoshi: Ooga good idea.

(Yoshi snatches Wizardhiemer's wand from his hand.)

Wizarhiemer: My magic wand! Without it I'm powerless.

(Yoshi eats it.)

Wizardhiemer: Give me back my wand you green faced glutton. Yow!

Yoshi: Mmm, deliciscrumpsious.

(Yoshi burps a mass of magic at Wizardhiemer, but misses and frees everybody.)

Princess: We're free!

Oogtar: Ooga awsome!

Mario: Now let's show Wizardmwhatchamacallit a new magic trick, how to disappear.

Wizardhiemer: That's WIZARDhiemer!

Marios: Wisen-whatever.

(The Marios jump on Wizardhiemer's head and knock him down.)

Princess: Nice going guys, now how do we get outta here?

Oogtar: No problemo, Oogtar break down door.

Mario: No Oogtar!

(Oogtar charges the door but doesn't budge it. Oogtar flies straight up and hits his head on a block, and a key comes out. Oogtar catches the key.)

Oogtar: Woah. Oogtar find magic key.

(The Marios wink and give him a thumbs up. Oogtar puts the key in the hole and is teleported to Dome City with everyone else.)

Luigi: It worked! We're back in Dome City!

Oogtar: Oogtar sorry he get friends in trouble. Yoshi brave rescue us. Way to go dino dude.

Mario: You sure did the job in that haunted house little buddy, I thought you were scared of ghosts.

Yoshi: Yoshi scared but Yoshi get by ghosts no problemo plumber dudes.

(Yoshi whistles and everybody laughs while he does.)

The End