Raven's Home: Remix

Booker: Aye, what it do, Spitz?

Spitz: I don't know what "it" do, but you need to pay more attention in English class.

Nia: Exactly. So Coach Spitz, what that sign up sheet be?

(All kids laugh)

Nia: You see what I did there?

Spitz: Sadly I did. It's for my new play. It's a story of a boy who dreams who becomes a famous horse jockey and dash when he has a growth spurt and winds up 6.5. I call it Spitz, the Musical.

Tess: A musical? About you?

Spitz: Yup (sighs). It's full of memorable moments like when I stand in front of the jockey commity and I say (loudly) "I'm not too big. Those horses are too small!"

Levi: Did they get bigger horses?

Spitz: Nope, they fired me. So I took a basketball league and learned to rap. Which is why my show is about a boy who learns to rap.

Booker: A basketball player that can rap? I was born to play that part! So, how 'bout we save us both the time and cast me as the lead? What do you say, Coach?"

Spitz: I say see you qat the audition.

Booker: Yes! Yes you will!

Tess: Basketball skills? Really?

Nia: And rapping? You can't even wrap a gift.

(both girls leave)

Booker: What do you think, Levi?

Levi: My mom always says if you having nothing nice to say, don't say anything at all.

Booker: So...

(Levi leaves)

Booker: Okay.

(Booker signs audition sheets)

I Want This

(Bell rings)

Booker: Oh! Here's that dime I was lookin' for! You see? I-I want this!

(Raven reads line)

Raven: "Spitz, you just too darn big to be a jockey."

Booker: "I'm not too big, those horses are too small!"

(Raven claps)

Raven: That was amazing, Booker! Or, should I say "Denzell?"

Nia: You should definitely say "Booker."

(Chelsea walks in from kitchen)

Chelsea: Okay, lucky people!. I've been trying out my new juicer and I just made some delicious turnip juice, and I really think you're gonna like it. I'm gonna go get some more.

(Chelsea goes to the kitchen)

Raven: Put it in the cup! Hurry!

(Chelsea walks back in)

Chelsea: Ahh! It looks like it was a hit! Who's ready for round two?

(Raven puts glass up)

Chelsea: Oh, you're still finishing that up? Help yourself.

(Raven screams with mouth closed and spits out the window)

Raven: You ain't the only one that can act, bruh.

Booker: Uh, hey! I have to rap for my audition, I memorized it. Want to hear?

Raven: Of course, we do!

Nia: I'd rather drink that juice.

(Booker raps poorly)

Nia: Stop.

Booker: No, it's definitely sho-

Nia: No, it's definitely "stop," that was really bad.

Levi: On the bright side, you just shouted out all types of stereotypes.

Booker: It sounded way better in my head.

Raven: Don't listen to the Booker haters, sweety. You are going to nail the lead in that musical.

Booker: Thanks, mom. When I get famous I'm gonna buy you something real shiny.

Raven: It doesn't have to be shiny, baby, it just needs to have four bedrooms.

(Booker has a vision)

Spitz: I have no choice, you're out of the play!

(Vision goes out)

Booker: Guys! I just had a vision Coach Spitz was gonna kick me out of the play!

Nia: Maybe, he had a vision of you rapping.

Booker: There goes my chance of fame and fortune.

Levi: Chin up, big guy. Just find someone who can teach you how to hoop and rap.

Booker: Levi, where am I gonna find someone who's good a hooping and rapping?

(Tess walks in)

Tess: I think our building just threw up on me!

Chelsea: Hey, is that my turni-

Raven: (stutters) Scatter!!

(Everyone runs in different directions)