Tanner vs. Gibbler

[In the kitchen, at breakfast time.]


 * Stephanie: D.J., which one of these [2] dresses will I look cuter in at your party?
 * D.J.: Steph, you wouldn't like this party. It's gonna be a bunch of 6th-graders.
 * Stephanie: In that case, I'll wear this one. It makes me look older.
 * D.J.: Let me say this is as nice as I can: [sticking up her index finger] you're in 1st grade, [adding the 5 fingers of her other hand] and all the kids at this party are in the 6th grade.
 * Stephanie: [doing the same with her hands] What if I... bring five other 1st-graders?
 * D.J.: OK, I've tried to be nice. Uncle Jesse!
 * Stephanie: Joey! She won't let me go to her party!
 * D.J.: You're not coming. You're too young.
 * [Arguing at the same time, the guys come in and pull them away from each other.]
 * Jesse: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold it. Neutral corners. D.J. first.
 * D.J.: She thinks she's coming to my party.
 * Stephanie: I do think that.
 * Joey: Steph, I have a great idea. Why don't we have our own super-duper party upstairs? Doesn't that sound like fun?
 * Stephanie: Does it sound like fun to you?
 * D.J.: Thanks, guys.

[At Kimmy's party, Nina and Melissa decide to make a phone call, and while Melissa dials "Duke's" number, D.J. asks them...]


 * D.J.: Before you call any Dukes, do you mind telling me what you're doing?
 * Nina: Don't worry. In an hour we'll have 50 or 60 kids here.
 * Melissa: Hello, Duke. [to D.J.] What's the address here?
 * D.J.: [grabbing the phone out of Melissa's hand] Hello, Duke? This is a prank call [and hangs up].
 * Melissa: What a dweeb.
 * D.J.: Hey, this party isn't for you and your friends. It's a party for Kimmy and her friends.
 * Kimmy: D.J., you're messing everything up. Don't you get it? They're in junior high.
 * D.J.: Who cares?
 * Nina: This is the land of the lame. Come on, Kimmy, let's get out of here.
 * D.J.: Kimmy, wait. You can't leave your own birthday party.
 * Kimmy: You can't tell me what to do.
 * D.J.: I'm not telling you what to do. I'm just saying don't act dumb.
 * Kimmy: Oh, now I'm dumb.
 * Melissa: You are if you stay here.
 * Nina: Come on, the mall's open 'til 9.
 * [And they exit, leaving D.J. and the other guests shocked and speechless.]

[In D.J. & Stephanie’s bedroom, Stephanie is playing "school", with herself as the "teacher", and every doll and stuffed animal as her "class".]


 * Stephanie: There will be no talking in class. Everyone turn to page... [cut to the "class"] Mr. Bear (see Trivia), if it's so funny, why don't you share it with everybody? [D.J. enters.] Hi, D.J. Wanna play school?
 * D.J.: No. I wanna quit school.
 * Stephanie: Is that because you ate lunch by yourself today?
 * D.J.: I wasn't eating by myself. I was eating alone. There's a big difference.
 * Stephanie: Any questions, class? [cut to Mr. Bear] Yes, Mr. Bear? Mr. Bear wants to know why all the kids in school were calling you a "geekburger."
 * D.J.: Mr. Bear is going to the principal's office. [She opens up the toy chest, grabs Mr. Bear, drops him inside, and closes it.]
 * Stephanie: That's the cafeteria. I told them you weren't a "geekburger". Then they called me "geekburger junior". How rude!
 * D.J.: It's all Kimmy's fault. She hates my guts because I wouldn't let her friends take over the party and wreck my house. Now she turned the whole school against me.
 * Stephanie: Don't feel bad. I know you're not a "geekburger".
 * D.J.: Thanks. And you're not a "geekburger junior".
 * Stephanie: Thanks back. But until this blows over... I think I'll change my name ... to....

[On the tape of the first show of Wake Up, San Francisco:]
 * Becky: Good morning.
 * Danny: It's time to Wake Up, San Francisco. I'm Danny Tanner.
 * Becky: And I'm Rebecca Donaldson.
 * Danny: And we like to know all your names but we're only an hour show and we've only got one phone.

[Kimmy comes over and D.J. thinks that she came to apologize, but she came to get her presents.]


 * D.J.: If you don't apologize, then how can I forgive you?
 * Kimmy: Forgive me for what? ... getting kicked out of my own party?
 * D.J.: I didn't kick you out! You left!
 * Kimmy: Because you embarrassed me in front of Nina and Melissa.
 * D.J.: What's wrong with you? I can't believe you'd rather be friends with girls who really aren't your friends than friends with a girl who already was your friend.
 * Kimmy: I don't know what you just said, but same to you, geekburger.
 * D.J.: Don't call me that, Kimmy Gobbler!
 * Kimmy: Double geekburger with cheese!
 * D.J.: I hate you!
 * Kimmy: I hate you, too! Mail me my presents.