Iron Bland 3 / Monsters Community


 * (Scene begins at Stark Mansion.)
 * Pepper Potts: Tony Stark, I can not believe you got me a such a big and impersonal christmas present.
 * Tony Stark: You mean the giant teddy bear?
 * Pepper Pots: Oh, I thought you got me a fleet of helicopters firing at our house.
 * [Roae, Boom]
 * Tony Stark: What?! Those jerks told me the fleet of missile-firing helicopters was sold out. Yaah! Well, time for my fancy superhero transformation. Iron Man, Assemble! [Clanking] Ow! Ooh! Ooh! Ow! Ow! Watch yourself! [Squeaking] Heh. still working out some of the bugs. I said iron, not tin [Clang] Let's be honest. We used up all the good stuff in "The Avengers" Movie.
 * [Music Playing]
 * (Title card: Iron Bland 3)
 * [Clank]
 * (Scene goes to Tennessee.)
 * Iron Man: Whoooa! Ahh! [Thud] Uuh! J.A.R.V.I.S.? What happened? Where are we?
 * J.A.R.V.I.S.: You were attacked ny the mandarin.
 * Tony Stark: The Mandarin? What did I ever do to him?
 * J.A.R.V.I.S.: Is it possible he's angry because he offered you something years ago and you rudely turned him down?
 * Tony Stark: Hmm...
 * [Flashback to Mandarin at the Mall.]
 * The Mandarin: Orange chicken. free sample of orange chicken?
 * Tony Stark: No, thanks.
 * The Mandarin: [Growls]
 * Iron Man: Very possible and so from look a things I'm guessing you followed my emergency plan of putting me in my correct suit and flying me to D.C.?
 * J.A.R.V.I.S.: To D.C.? So you didn't say Tennessee? 'Cause to D.C. sounds a lot like Tennessee.
 * Tony Stark: Tennessee? Why would I want to go there? D.C. is where the military is, where I'd be protected. That's where we are, isn't it?
 * J.A.R.V.I.S.: Uh... yes, of course. I mean, why would I-- uh-oh, I'm running out of power... [Snoring]
 * Tony Stark: Machines don't snore, J.A.R.V.I.S. You can;t even fake it well.
 * J.A.R.V.I.S.: Still now power. [Snoring]
 * Tony Stark: Note to self: This Iron Man carry-on luggage would be better if it had wheels.
 * Harley Keener: Wow! Tony Stark, what are you doing here in Tennessee?
 * Tony Stark: Tennessee?! J.A.R.V.I.S.! I'm trying to fix my suit. Think you can help?
 * Harley Keener: Let me get this straight. You have access to "The Avengers" and about 50 "Iron Man" suits and you're asking me for help?
 * Tony Stark: For you information, Pepper is in charge of my suits, and If know her she's putting them to good use as we speak.
 * Pepper Potts: Look, Rhodey, I'm an Iron version of One Direction.
 * Harley Keener: Ok, then what about "The Avengers"?
 * Tony Stark: Well, "The Avengers" are, uh--uh-- Uh-oh, I'm running out of power. Errr...ooh! [Snoring]
 * Harley Keener: Humans don't lose power, Tony. You can't even fake it well.
 * Tony Stark: Still no power... [Snoring]
 * (At Mandarin's base)
 * Iron Man: Hold it right there, Mandarian. You're coming with me.
 * Mandarian: I don't think so. I've got prisoners.
 * Iron Man: Oh, no! You captured Captain America, too?
 * Iron Patriot: Uh...no. Tony, It's me, Rhodey. you know, the Iron Patriot?
 * Iron Man: The Iron Patriot? Then why heck aren't you in "The Avengers"? I mean, wouldn't a patriotic robot be so much cooler than an old guy from World War II who calls himself Captain America?
 * The Mandarian: That's enough, Tony Stark. The time for you to die is now.
 * Iron Man: Oh, really? 'cause I brought back up.
 * (Iron Legion arrives)
 * The Mandarian: Ok, hang on. hang on. Let's not do anything hasty here, 'cause well, I'm just an actor, see? The Mandarian is just a character I'm playing.
 * Iron Man: A character?
 * The Mandarian: Yes. couldn't you tell? I'm just copying the actor Hugo Weaving.
 * Agent Smith: He's telling the truth, and I will never stop chasing you.
 * Iron Man: Then that's even more of a reason to destroy him. get ready to see what an army of robots can do. Pepper did you do this?
 * Pepper Potts: Uh, well, Rhodey came over and then we, uh-- uh-oh-- losing power. [Snoring]
 * Iron Patriot: Yeah, why aren't I in "The Avengers"?
 * (Segment ends)