Cowboys & Alien Force / ThunderLOLcats

(Scene begins looking up at the sky with an eagle screeching)

(Scene goes down to show Jake Lonergan in the middle of the desert looking confused)

Jake Lonergan: (Gasps) I have no memory.

(Buzz Lightyear gets up on the right side of him)

Buzz: I have no memory.

POW!

(Jedediah Benjamin Tennison gets up on the left side of him)

Jedediah Benjamin Tennison: I have no pants!

POW!

Cowboy: Hey, Punchy McPunch-A-Lot.

(Scene goes to the left to show the Cowboy riding on a horse)

Cowboy: I think you stole that boy's outfit.

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan who is getting up from the ground)

Jake Lonergan: What makes you say that?

(Scene goes to the Cowboy)

Cowboy: Well, that there's (Scene backs out to show an unconscious Jedediah Benjamin Tennison with no pants and the crows picking on him) Jedediah Benjamin Tennison. And you're wearing his (Scene goes to Jake Lonergan's pants while a person whistles) pants, (Scene goes to the top of Jake Lonergan's body) his hat, and his Omnitrix.

(Scene zooms in on the Omnitrix and it beeps on Jake Lonergan's hand)

Jake Lonergan: Hmm. Don't remember taking it.

(Scene goes to the Cowboy)

Cowboy: Of course you don't, 'cause that would be copyright (Money ding is heard) infringement.

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan)

Jake Lonergan: Oh. Then I guess I should change the title and get rid of the guy who knows about it.

(Scene goes to the Cowboy)

Cowboy: That sounds like a plan. Wait. What?

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan pressing the Omnitrix and turning into an alien)

SMASH!

(Title card 1: "Cowboys & Alien Force")

(Scene resumes with Jake Lonergan walking through the town of Absolution)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: Jake Lonergan, (A group of people surround Jake Lonergan) you stole something from me.

(Camera zooms in on Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: What do you have to say for yourself?

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan)

Jake Lonergan: I have no memory.

POW!

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan's head in the water and Dory swims to him)

Dory: I also have no memory.

POW! POW-POW-POW-POW...

Ella Swenson: (While Doc and Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde punch Jake Lonergan) Stop fighting. (Scene zooms in on her and other folk people) Something weird is coming this way.

(Scene goes to Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde holding Jake Lonergan)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: How can you tell?

(Scene goes back to Ella Swenson and other folk people)

Ella Swenson: His wrist is all lit up.

(Scene goes back to Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde holding Jake Lonergan)

Jake Lonergan: (While looking at his wrist) No, it's not.

Ella Swenson: Not that wrist.

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan's other wrist to show another pink bracelet with hearts on it)

Ella Swenson: (While pointing at it) That wrist.

(Scene zooms in on the bracelet and it shoots out 3 hearts that disappear quickly)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: Is that a (Scene backs out to show Doc and Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde) My Little Pony bracelet?

Jake Lonergan: I sure hope not.

(Ponies in the background can be heard roaring in the background)

(Scene backs out to show in the far sky background a flash and then colorful dots heading towards Absolution)

(Scene goes to the sky to show My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic ponies flying towards the town of Absolution)

(Scene goes to the folktown people looking scared)

Ella Swenson: Aah!

(Scene goes to Rainbow Dash, who looks angry, and zooms in on her)

(Scene goes back to the folktown where people are screaming and a person got taken away by a rope)

(Title card 2: "Cowboys & Equestrians")

(Scene goes back to Ella Swenson staying in her place while people are running and avoiding the attacks from the ponies or getting caught by the ropes)

Ella Swenson: Wait, we did the opening title already.

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan and Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde)

Jake Lonergan: We did? I don't remember them.

(Mr. Forgetful pops up on the left side of Jake Lonergan)

Mr. Forgetful: I don't remember them either.

(A rope captures Mr. Forgetful and takes him away)

(Scene goes to Mr. Forgetful being taken away in the sky)

Mr. Forgetful: AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!

(Scene goes back to Jake Lonergan and Doc)

Doc: Something strange about these ponies. They have huge eyes and weird bulbous heads. That's not what ponies look like.

POW!

Jake Lonergan: Ponies also don't fly, Doc.

(A horse is heard neighing in the background)

(Scene goes to the sky where a pony with green hair in a hot air balloon is coming towards Absolution, scene goes back to Jake Lonergan in which he uses his My Little Pony bracelet and pulls out a rainbow cannon, scene goes to Jake Lonergan shooting down the hot air balloon and the hot air balloon crashes into the entrance making dust go everywhere, after the dust clears up, the scene goes to Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde looking at the My Little Pony bracelet)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: (While the My Little Pony rainbow cannon is put away) You're not gonna tell me you don't remember how either of those things got on your wrists?

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan)

Jake Lonergan: Afraid not.

(Scene goes to Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: Any chance you remember that last Indiana Jones movie?

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan)

Jake Lonergan: That I wish I could forget.

(Scene goes to a sad Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde while camera zooms in on him and sad music is heard playing)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: Yep. Me, too. (Wipes tear out of eye with hand) Me, too.

(Glow light appears on the left and Ella Swenson comes from the right side of the camera screen)

Ella Swenson: Oh, no, more trouble. (Puts on sunglasses) Your wristband is glowing again.

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan looking at his My Little Pony bracelet)

Jake Lonergan: No, it ain't.

Ella Swenson: Not that one.

POW!

Ella Swenson: That one.

(Glowing light disappears)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: Shoot. (Scene goes to Jake Lonergan's wrist to show 3 Silly Bandz) Are those Silly Bandz?

(Scene backs out to show Jake Lonergan)

Jake Lonergan: This is getting weird.

(Title card 3: "Cowboys & Silly Bands")

(Scene goes back to Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde, Ella Swenson and Jake Lonergan)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde and Ella Swenson: We did that already.

(Scene zooms in on Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde and Ella Swenson)

Ella Swenson: Those bands don't shoot lasers, too, do they?

Jake Lonergan: Don't be crazy. They're Silly Bands. Why would they-

(Silly Bandz unleash a powerful red laser that burns Ella Swenson and turns her into ash)

(Scene zooms in on Jake Lonergan, who is looking at his Silly Bandz)

Jake Lonergan: I guess a better name might be Shooty Bands.

(Scene goes to the ash as it wobbles and it transforms back into Ella Swenson)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: What the?

(Scene zooms in on Jake Lonergan)

Jake Lonergan: You ain't dead?

(Ella Swenson walks towards Jake Lonergan and punches him in the face)

Ella Swenson: No. (Scene slowly zooms in on her and sad music is played) The truth is, I'm not human. I only took this form so you'd like me.

Jake Lonergan: I appreciate that, darlin'.

(Jake Lonergan kisses Ella Swenson only for her to manufacture and transform into Applejack)

(Jake Lonergan lets go off Applejack and spits)

Jake Lonergan: (Spits) You're one of them? I can't believe I just kissed a pony.

(Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde walks up behind Jake Lonergan)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: I can't believe a man can own so many bracelets.

(Scene zooms in on Applejack)

Applejack: My name's Applejack. But we're not the ones stealing your people. We're here to find out who's kidnapping us as well.

(Scene backs out to show Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde and Jake Lonergan)

Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde: Then who in tarnation is stealing our--

(A giant metal claw from the sky grabs Colonel Woodrow Dolarhyde and takes him away leaving a white garment behind)

Jake Lonergan: Only one way to find out.

(Scene zooms in on Applejack walking towards Jake Lonergan while he gets on her)

Jake Lonergan: Come on, Applejack. Let's ride.

Applejack: Um, I'm not one of the ponies who can fly.

Jake Lonergan: Now you tell me.

(A giant metal claw from the sky picks up Jake Lonergan and Applejack and takes them to the ship where Jon Favreau is sitting on his throne)

Applejack and Jake Lonergan: Jon Favreau?

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan riding on Applejack)

Jake Lonergan: Aren't you directing this movie?

(Scene goes to Jon Favreau)

Jon Favreau: Yes, but the script needs work, so I keep kidnapping (Scene backs out to show writers typing on typewriters) writers to help me finish it.

(Writer pops of the right side and hands a script to Jon Favreau)

Jon Favreau: No!

(Jon Favreau throws away script and punches the writer)

Jon Favreau: Still not there.

(Jon Favreau presses button and the giant metal claw goes down)

(Scene goes to Iron Man and Captain America talking in the Avengerteria)

Iron Man: So then he says, I'm not gonna direct the third one. And I'm like...

(The giant metal claw grabs Iron Man and takes him back to the ship and on a typewriter)

(Scene goes to Jake Lonergan still riding on Applejack)

Jake Lonergan: What's so difficult? It's a mash-up of two genres. They do it on "MAD" all the time.

(Scene goes to Jon Favreau)

Jon Favreau: Really? Good to know.

(Jon Favreau presses button and scene goes to the MAD headquarters where the giant metal claw goes through the building and picks up Alfred E. Neuman and puts him in a typewriter)

(Alfred E. Neuman cracks his knuckles and begins to write and then the scene goes to Alfred E. Neuman giving his script to Jake Lonergan first)

Jake Lonergan: (Sighs) Let's hope we all forget this one.

(Jake Lonergan gives the script to Jon Favreau and he reads it while the scene zooms in on him a little)

Jon Favreau: Perfect!

(Title card 4: "Cowboys & Alfreds")

(Scene resumes with Jon Favreau and Alfred E. Neuman)

Jon Favreau: (While he holds out his hand to shake Alfred E. Neuman's hand) Nice working with you.

(Two alien hands come out of Alfred E. Neuman's body and one of his hands shakes Jon Favreau's hand and leaves goo behind)

Jon Favreau: Ew.

(Segment ends)

(Scene begins with a wall full of drawings and moves as Claudus talks)

Claudus: And so it is written that a great hero will one day defend the ThunderCats from evil (Scene backs out to show Claudus looking at the wall) by wielding the sword of Omens. And with any luck, (Claudus turns around) that hero will be...

(Scene backs out to show Lion-LOL playing with a ball of yarn)

Claudus: Lion-LOL.

(Scene zooms in on Lion-LOL and it shows a LOLcat picture saying "I CAN HAS OMINS?")

Lion-LOL: I can has Omins?

Claudus: Not if you don't abandon this obsession with the internet.

(Scene goes to Lion-LOL popping up from the other side)

Lion-LOL: But, father, the internet is real. It's out there somewhere, I know it.

Claudus: Ugh. For the last time, there's no such thing as the internet.

(Scene goes to Lion-LOL looking angry and holding his hands making an LOLcat picture say "INVISIBLE SANDWICH")

(Scene goes to Claudus face palmed and made an LOLcat picture say "FACEPALM")

(Scene goes to the title card ThunderLOLcats with "LOL" appearing in the middle and the logo as the "O")

(Scene goes back outside with Claudus, Lion-LOL and some soldiers overlooking their fort to see a "Double Rainbow" in the horizon)

(Scene goes to Tygra walking up to Claudus and Lion-LOL)

Tygra: Lord Claudus, (Scene zooms in on Tygra) the day we feared has come!

(Scene goes to the outside of the fort where dogmen are walking up and preparing to attack)

Tygra: The Dogmen are attacking.

(Scene goes to the Dogmen faces)

Rave 1: Dog 4, this is Rave 1. Come in, Dog 4. We are approaching the cat fort. What are your orders?

(Scene goes to Dog 4 hiding in a fort)

Dog 4: This is Dog 4. Commence bombing.

(Scene goes outside to show an army shadow of dogmen, ground and air, walking to the fort of Thundera)

Claudus: By Thundera! What is it?

(Scene goes to the air dogmen, and then the ground dog men in boxes of tank)

Lion-LOL: Told you it was real. The dogs have harnessed the power of the Internet.

(Scene goes to the shadows of air dogmen as they release Narwhals)

(Scene zooms in on the Narwhals while falling down on the fort)

Narwhal: Yeah! I'm a Narwhal!

(Scene goes back to Claudus and Lion-LOL)

Claudus: Quickly, back inside.

(Claudus and Lion-LOL run inside the fort while the Narwhals land)

Narwhal: I'm the Jedi of the seas!

(Scene goes to Lion-LOL and Claudus running inside)

Lion-LOL: Whiskers! I've always dreamed of the internet, (Scene goes outside to show internet memes walking to the fort to attack) but now it's become a nightmare.

(Scene goes back to Claudus and Lion-LOL)

Claudus: They'll never get through our firewalls.

(Scene goes to the side of a fort where cardinals are shooting it with guns and a Creeper walks up to the fort)

Creeper: That's a nice wall you've got there.

(Creeper explodes in the wall and other Creepers walk up to the fort and explodes as well)

(Scene goes to 3 Dogmen with Shoop da Whoop appearing on their faces seconds later saying "IM FIRIN MAH LAZER!!!1!" and they shoot lasers at the wall leaving an explosion)

(Scene goes to the fort with Lion-LOL acting surprise and made an LOLcat picture say "DO NOT WANT")

(Scene goes to the Dogmen and other internet memes)

Dogman: Claudus, come out and face us, (Scene backs out to show all internet memes and a chicken holding Panthro) or your best friend gets it.

(Scene goes to Claudus)

Claudus: Panthro, I'll save you.

(Claudus gets out sword and starts running towards the enemy)

Claudus: Aah!

(Scene goes to Claudus defeating all the internet memes with his sword)

(Scene goes to Claudus offering a hand to Panthro)

Claudus: Are you OK?

(Panthro grabs a sword from the back and stabs Claudus's body)

Claudus: Samoflange....

(Claudus drops to the floor and scene go up to Panthro troll smiling and making the LOLcat picture say "PWND")

(Scene goes to Tygra and Lion-LOL)

Tygra: You're not Panthro!

(PROBLEM?)

(Scene backs out a little and Fake Panthro turns into Troll-Ra)

Troll-Ra: I'm Troll-Ra, the ever trolling.

(Troll-Ra unleashes a purple light and knocks out Tygra and Lion-LOL)

(Scene goes to Lion-LOL passing out and goes in the internet of all things)

Lion-LOL: Where am I? (Scene goes to the right to show Happycat)

Happycat: You're in the internet, Lion-LOL. (Scene zooms in on him) Troll-Ra's defeating your people with stupid overused memes. (Scene goes to Lion-LOL) The only way to fight him is with even stupider memes!

(Scene zooms in on Lion-LOL)

Lion-LOL: I have but one question. Can I have some of that cheeseburger?

(I Can Has Cheezburger Cat put his cheeseburger into Lion-LOL's mouth)

Happycat: Yes, (Scene zooms in on him) that's the spirit. (Scene goes back to Lion-LOL) Now go!

(Scene goes back to Lion-LOL in the Thundera world waking up, looking around at the damage the internet memes caused and grabbing his word while Troll-Ra laughs)

Troll-Ra: Ha ha ha!

(Lion-LOL comes from behind him)

Troll-Ra: What- what is this?

(Scene zooms in on Lion-LOL while he prepares his attack with his sword)

Lion-LOL: Thunder! Thunder! ThunderCats, LOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLL!

(Lion-LOL causes an explosion and defeats all the internet memes and Troll-Ra)

(A rainbow saying "Adventure" on top of it appears)

(Scene goes to Lion-LOL in Nyan cat form racing through space for a while)

(Scene goes to Claudus who is lying on the floor)

Claudus: I still don't understand any of this.

(Segment ends)