Super-Grounded

Narrator: It’s another routine day at National National Bank. People making deposits, people making withdrawals, people submitting loan applications for hot rods with fancy wheels. And of course, the odd menacing type trying to get a little something for a lot of nothing!

(The Butcher slaps down a slice of meat in front of the teller:)

Teller: Um, what is this?

Butcher: It’s a check, made out to me, the Butcher!

Teller: Uh-huh.

Butcher: For a big load of cash!

Teller: Wow, it actually says that!

Butcher: That’s right. If you could just turn that into money, I’ll be on my way.

Teller: Look, I’m sorry sir. We have a very strict “no bologna check” policy.

Butcher: Huh… well, that’s no problem! Got another checkbook right here! “Pay to the Butcher” -- thats me -- “a big load of cash.” There you go, my good woman!

Teller: Yeah… I don’t think so!

Butcher: What?

Teller: No olive loaf checks!

Butcher: Oh, well--

Teller: Look, no lunch meat checks of any kind!

Butcher: That’s disk-appointy!

Teller: What?

Butcher: You know, disk-appointy. Disk-appointy!

Teller: Disk-appointy isn’t a word! No matter how many times you say it! Next!

Butcher: Well, that’s kinda rude!

Teller: Sorry. Next!

Butcher: You know, I probably would have done this anyway, but now I feel less bad about it! PASTRAMI ATTACK! (He covers her in pastrami, then grabs a pile of money and starts to walk off, then sees a bowl of suckers and grabs one.) Oh, strawberry!

(Scene: inside Becky’s bedroom at the Botsford house. Becky is reading Unicorn Weekly magazine, and Bob is playing with a paddle ball.)

Becky: Uh! I’m just saying, unicorns are great animals! They’re beautiful, they’re magical… (Bob says something)  They are TOO real! (She stands up as she hears something with her super-hearing.) Hey, that’s the bank alarm! We’ve got to get there pronto! Word UP!--

Mr. Botsford: Becky!

(She has started transforming into WordGirl, but then stops when she hears her dad’s voice. She is already wearing her red pants and boots, and her WordGirl logo has appeared on the outside of her green shirt.)

Becky: Uh--

Mr. Botsford: (coming into the bedroom) I was thinking about going to the discount cookie store, and-- (he stops and lets out a loud gasp) Great barrier reef! Look at this mess! Becky! Why didn’t you clean your room when I asked you to last week?

Becky: Umm… I was busy? (thinking about battling Tobey’s robots)

Mr. Botsford: Well, you certainly had enough time to eat all these bananas! (Bob looks away innocently.)

Becky: (trying to hide the WordGirl emblem on her shirt) I’m sorry Dad, I promise I’ll do it after I get back from the-- uh, library! I have to return a book.

Mr. Botsford: Becky, the library has plenty of books. I’m sure they can get by for now without that one.

Becky: But it’s-- their best one! And it’s overdue! What will they think of me?

Mr. Botsford: I’m sure the librarian will be just as  disappointed  in you as I am. You’ll stay here until you’ve cleaned up this mess! I’ll just go to the discount cookie store by myself. Hmph!

Narrator: Meanwhile, across town…

(Scene: The grocery store. The manager is ringing up purchases.)

Manager: And, your total comes to-- whoa! A whole big load of money! And how would you like to pay for that today?

Butcher: Uh, I was thinking of paying in check. You take check, don’t you? (Holds up a slice of salami and signs his name.)

Manager: (sniffing) Wait! Is that check made out of salami?

Butcher: Um… maybe.

Manager: Why, that’s brilliant! Salami checks-- the checks you can eat! You sir are HIRED!

Butcher: No, uh-- I don’t need a job. I just want to pay for my groceries!

Manager: With a salami check? I don’t think so! You’re fired! (eats the salami)

Butcher: But you just said salami checks were brilliant!

Manager: They are! I’d sell ‘em! But I’m not gonna take ‘em! Why, that would be  preposterous !

Butcher:  Preposterous ? Sir, how dare you! I demand an explanation!

Manager: You mean, an apology?

Butcher: No, an explanation. I have no idea what  preposterous  means. Wait! Why would I want an apology?

Manager: Uh-- no time to explain, you’re holding up the line.

Butcher: Oh yeah? I’ll teach YOU to call my meat checks  preposterous ! LIVERWURST WHAMMO!

(The manager is covered in liverwurst. He manages to work his hand free, and presses an alarm button on the register.)

(Scene: back in Becky’s bedroom)

Becky: (frustrated) Clean my room! Maybe I like my room this way! Besides, I know where everything is, and-- (holds up a glowing mineral) Hey! I thought I lost this!

(She hears the alarm in the distance.)

Becky: Wait-- it’s the alarm at the grocery store! Word UP!--

(Becky’s dad opens the door and comes in, carrying a box of cookies.)

Mr. Botsford: Hey Becky, I’m back from the discount cookie store, and-- (gasps) For the love of all things Elvis, what is going on here?? (Becky and Bob have fully transformed into WordGirl and Huggy, and are trying to leave through the window.)

Becky/WordGirl: Dad, I can explain--

Mr. Botsford: Young lady! I told you to clean this room!

Becky/WordGirl: But--

Mr. Botsford: But nothing! You think you can sneak out and play dress-up without doing as you’re told?!

Becky: (relieved) Right! Dress-up! I love-- dressing up like WordGirl!

Mr. Botsford: You are not to leave this room until it is CLEAN! Honestly, I am so  disappointed  in you. I can’t promise these cookies will still be here when you’re done! I eat when I’m upset. Well Bob, I don’t remember grounding you. You can go out and play dress-up! I mean, who would expect a monkey to clean a room? It’s  preposterous ! (leaves the room)

Narrator: Can it be? How can WordGirl foil the Butcher’s crime wave while she’s super-grounded?

Becky/WordGirl: I’ll find a way!

Narrator: I’m sure you will, Sloppy Jane!

WordGirl: Hey! (Huggy chuckles)

Narrator: Sorry.

WordGirl: Captain Huggy Face, go! We can stay in touch with our communicators! Good luck!

(Huggy runs off, but soon after this the communicator signals him.)

WordGirl: CHF, what are your coordinates? (Huggy stops and chatters.) The front yard?! Can’t you get there faster?

(Next we see Huggy pedalling down the street on a bike.)

(Scene: The grocery store. The manager is still covered in salami, and the Butcher is standing on the other side of the counter.)

Butcher: And now, I’m going to steal-- ooh, free olives!

Manager: Hey! Those samples are for paying customers!

Butcher: I tried to pay you, but you wouldn’t accept my check, and then you called it  preposterous ! That’s horrible!

Manager: Still don’t know what  preposterous  means, huh?

Butcher: Nope, not a clue.

(The sliding doors open behind him.)

WordGirl: Hold it right there, Butcher!

Butcher: WordGirl! (He turns around, but only sees Huggy standing there.) What, are you behind the otter?

WordGirl: (her voice coming from the communicator) Otter? No no, I’m, uh, off battling a far more dangerous villain than you!

Butcher: Really?

WordGirl: It’s, a-- 70-foot kitten with laser claws who will-- drink all the town’s milk, so I sent Captain Huggy Face to cut you down to size!

Butcher: (sitting down) You know, I don’t-- I don’t get it. I’m dangerous! And I’m a little disk-appointyed that you don’t think so.

WordGirl: disk-a WHAT?

Butcher: Pointy! You know… disk-appointy!

WordGirl: I think you mean  disappointed .

Butcher: I might.

WordGirl:  Disappointed , it means to feel let down by something or someone. You know, to not get exactly what you wanted.

Butcher: Yeah!  Disappointed . I am  disappointed  that you don’t think I’m dangerous enough to fight in person!

WordGirl: Right! And I’m  disappointed  that I can’t be there to defeat you, because I have to cl-- c-- clobber this fifty-foot laser-clawed kitty!

Butcher: (under his breath) Kitty doesn’t sound so dangerous!

WordGirl: Captain Huggy Face, take him down!

(Huggy assumes a fighting stance, on top of a stack of toilet paper. He throws several rolls at the Butcher, knocking him over.)

Butcher: Not so fast, Karate Otter! Try my CHICKEN WING FLING! (He fires chicken wings at Huggy, which end up pinning his arms and legs to a sign.) I’ll show HER who’s powerful! (walks off)

WordGirl: Captain Huggy Face, what’s happening? (He tells her.) Chicken wings? Well, is there someone you can ask for help?

Manager: (still trapped in salami slices) Don’t look at me!

WordGirl: Ooh, this is hopeless! I can’t let the Butcher get away just because of a messy room! (Getting an idea, she uses her super-speed to straighten up.)

Narrator: Well done!

WordGirl: Thanks! (yells out the door) Dad! I’m done!

Mr. Botsford: Becky, you can’t possibly expect me to believe you cleaned everything in just ten minutes!

WordGirl: But Dad--

Mr. Botsford: Bu-bu-but, I know all the tricks! Shoving everything in the closet is not cleaning!

WordGirl: But Dad, I--

Mr. Botsford: But Dad I nothing! You’re still grounded! (a crashing sound) Ahh! Who put all this stuff in the hall closet?

WordGirl: Uh! Come in, Captain Huggy Face! (He has managed to free himself.) The alarm for City Hall just went off! You have to hustle! Well, I’m sorry, you have to!

(Huggy again rides his bike to City Hall.)

(At City Hall, the Butcher is holding five employees hostage. Their hands are in the air.)

Butcher: Once I steal all the city’s money, the entire city will fall apart! THEN WordGirl will see how dangerous I am!

Employee: But we don’t keep the city’s money here. We keep it in the bank.

Butcher: The bank? Nuh-uh, I ain’t goin’ back there! They hurt my feelings.

Employee: Sorry, but--

Butcher: But nothing! You better do what I ask! I-I’m a dangerous criminal! (changing tone) So, pretty pwease give me all the city’s money?

(The door opens with a loud thud.)

Butcher: (expecting WordGirl) A-ha! (realizes it’s only Huggy) Oh. Just you! (Huggy complains.) Well, I’m sorry! No offense, I-I’m just a little  disappointed . Well you know, WordGirl doesn’t think I’m dangerous enough to battle in person anymore… the little grocery guy called my meat checks  preposterous … (tearing up, sniffs) Hasn’t been a great day! Hey WordGirl, you on the line?

WordGirl: I’m here.

Butcher: Is that why you don’t think I’m dangerous anymore, because my meat checks were  preposterous ?

WordGirl: Your what, now?

Butcher: My meat checks, you know-- a check for money but made out of meat!

WordGirl: That is pretty  preposterous !

Butcher: Oh.

WordGirl: Do you know what  preposterous  means?

Butcher: Uh, does it have to do with my stomach? Because I was born with bigger stomach bones than most people.

Employee: There aren’t any bones in your stomach.

Butcher: Well there’s at least one, I accidentally swallowed it yesterday.

WordGirl: Right, uh, no.  Preposterous  has nothing to do with your stomach, actually, It means ridiculous or absurd!

Butcher: Oh.

WordGirl: For example, the idea that a superhero could be grounded is  preposterous ! I mean, come on!

Butcher: Uh, are we still talkin’ about me?

WordGirl: Um, maybe?

Butcher: Oh, well it doesn’t matter! My meat checks may have been  preposterous , but I’m still a dangerous criminal! And to prove it, I’m gonna defeat your hairy little friend here! Prepare yourself, little otter, for the battle of your LIFE!

(They square off, each of them assuming a fighting position.)

Narrator: Tension is in the air! The battle is about to--

(Suddenly, a male voice is heard over the communicator.)

Mr. Botsford: Pumpkin? Oh, pumpkin? Hey there. I can’t stay mad at you forever, my little piggly-pumpkin! Everything looks like it’s in tip-top shape in here. I think you’ve learned you lesson. You’re officially un-grounded! Now, go ahead and run along to your dress-up play date at the library! (There is a ding) Oh, there’s the timer on my turkey! Be back in time for dinner, sweetpea!

WordGirl: Uh, thanks-- mister!

Butcher: Huh! So that’s why WordGirl wasn’t showing up? She was grounded? Ah, so she still thinks I’m dangerous, right? Oh, that is a load off my mind! I was starting to feel like chopped liver! Well, while I’m here, I may as well take all the city’s money anyway. Hate to waste a trip! In the bag please.

WordGirl: (arriving on the scene) Your time is done, Butcher! Well done!

Butcher: WordGirl! (begins cheering) Yay! WordGirl showed up! I’m a dangerous criminal!

WordGirl: Huh! Never got that reaction before…

Butcher: Oh yeah? Well how about THIS reaction? PASTRAMI ATTACK!

(Huggy jumps onto Butcher, knocking him to the ground. WordGirl then ties him up.)

Butcher: We’ll meet again, WordGirl! Because I’m dangerous. You said so yourself!

WordGirl: Okay!

(Huggy is carrying him to the police station in the basket of the bike, and WordGirl is flying alongside.)

Butcher: Can I get that in writing?

WordGirl: I’ll send you a postcard-- in jail.

Butcher: Okay, great! Only dangerous criminals go to jail! Ya-HOO!

Narrator: Odd reaction.

WordGirl: I know, right?

Narrator: Anyway, you won’t be  disappointed  if you tune in next time to another exciting adventure of… WordGirl!