Dehulked

Iron Man: Welcome to Stark Industries, developer of the most amazing technology on the planet.

Which is why so many bad guys are always trying to steal it.

In this case, the tech-pirates known as SteelCorps.

Normally I'd call for some muscle, but it's Saturday and Hulk likes to sleep in.

Friday: Is this really the best time to be making a corporate video?

Just keep recording, Friday.

There's nothing investors like more than smacking down the competition.

S.H.I.E.L.D. rockets, A.I.M. thrusters and are those Justin Hammer optics?

Doesn't anybody know how to innovate anymore?

robot: Innovation, Stark, is simply using old ideas in new ways.

There is also something to be said for strength in numbers.

Whoa. Hey! Watch it!

Maybe you should call your big green friend.

Friday: Power levels are at 15%.

Which is also your chance of coming out of this alive.

Friday, call for backup!

Comms just went down. Which puts you at 10%. For both.

You can stop recording now.

[grunts]

Took long enough for you to show.

[roars]

[grunting]

Iron Man, what are you doing fighting these guys on your own?

I appreciate your concern, Hulk.

Concern? I almost slept right through the smashing.

Now!

Hulk!

[groaning]

[groaning continues]

[groaning]

What happened? I don't...

Banner. Always good to see you, but maybe now is not a great time.

You can say that again.

Human again? But how?

Power's back to 20%.

Turn back into the Hulk now! You won't last five seconds in this.

By my estimate you're being generous.

[groaning]

You need a little help getting riled up there, Mr. "I'm-Always-Angry"?

[grunts]

I never have before. It doesn't make any sense.

Well, your B.O.'s even worse than the Hulk's, and you're kinda useless in a fight.

More!

Maybe I can help. How's this? You finally have a puny body to match your puny mind, Bruce!

That voice. It's so familiar.

Ha! So long, Mister...

[grunts]

The Hulk never runs from a fight.

You're not the Hulk. So stay put or get smashed.

[grunting]

Banner: Get away from him.

So now you're cribbing my Stark Tech?

I'm innovating.

Maybe it's time for a little reflection.

I couldn't agree more.

We have what we need. Let's go.

Go, science bros.

Falcon: According to these bio-scans, Bruce's gamma levels are way below normal.

Normal for him at least.

Tony, what's the bottom line?

The Hulk is basically a walking gamma reactor.

Somehow he's been cooled down.

Can't we start him back up?

I don't know... make him sit too close to the microwave or something?

Or perhaps a jump start.

Microwave? Lightning?

It was a precisely calibrated gamma wavelength that would be nearly impossible to recreate.

Falcon: We may not need to.

Your cells are still generating residual gamma radiation.

Good catch, Falcon. Like burning embers.

If they smolder long enough, they can restart.

But it will take time to get to his transformation point... If ever.

Iron Man: Bottom line...

You can skip the stretchy pants for awhile.

Meanwhile, any idea who your SteelCorps buddy might be?

His voice was so familiar, but I can't place it.

Take some time. Maybe it'll come to you.

[alarm blares]

[door opens]

Huh?

Bank robbery in progress.

Let's go.

I'm coming too.

It's just a bank robber.

[roars]

[static]

It's the Abomination.

Maybe I'll go... stop an online hacker or something.

[roars]

[lasers shooting]

[beep]

[groans]

I call foul play!

Using your tiny fingers is an unfair advantage.

Hmm!

[groaning]

[grunts, sighs]

Titanium woven sheets seemed like a good idea at the time.

[whirring]

[arrow whooshing]

Can I join in?

[chuckles]

Yeah, no thanks.

Last time we sparred, you thunder-clapped me into a wall.

Those warheads. I can power them up for you.

Eh, knock yourself out.

Gimme!

Huh.

Maybe this "All-Banner- All-the-Time" ain't such a bad thing.

I'm glad you stopped sulking.

But you're giving Hawkeye an upgrade?

I'm also de-powering his Hulkbuster arrows.

Don't tell him, but they really sting.

Hand me the wire stripper.

And Cap's helmet... I think there's a way to make it withstand more force.

Static probe?

Reminds me of our first time nerding-out together back on the Helicarrier.

Spanner?

I've been such a fan of your whole rage monster thing, I forgot how much I missed having my old science bro around.

The big guy tends to take over sometimes.

And to be honest, it was nice to just let someone else drive for awhile.

Ugh! Got a good whiff of that guy's breath and figured out why they call him the Abomination.

You missed a good fight.

We did some work while you were gone.

It's half the weight.

And twice as strong. And Hawkeye, I increased the output power of your arrows by drawing on their own kinetic energy.

That's amazing.

Yeah, we're not used to you leaving things, you know, the opposite of broken.

[alarm blaring]

Attack on the East River Nuclear Reactor. SteelCorps.

They're not even trying to hide who it is.

Like they don't even care if we show up and kick their butts.

Us? You got lucky last time.

No way you're fighting armored supervillains today.

Avengers... Except you, sorry.

Assemble!

Set the reactor to overload.

Thor: I think not.

Stop them!

[groans]

[both groan]

[groans]

[groans]

[grunts]

[groaning]

Anybody miss me?

The Hulk!

Not quite.

Is that my Hulkbuster armor?

As long as he is on our side, I do not care.

[lasers firing]

[arrow whooshing]

[grunts]

Not War Machine, not Iron Patriot.

What exactly are you?

An Avenger!

Bruce? Even with that cobbled-up tech, you're useless!

I'm...not...useless!

Igor Drenkov?

Of course! Igor Drenkov.

[scoffs]

Who's Igor Drenkov?

My old lab partner.

We worked together back during the Super Soldier program.

But... but the gamma explosion!

You were never found.

[screaming]

You're dead.

Presumed dead.

[groans]

All these Gamma-tech thefts!

Are you trying to recreate the accident?

Replicate the explosion that turned me into the Hulk? Why?

Because I was the one who should have absorbed the gamma rays.

I should have gotten the power and become the celebrated hero.

Everyone within 100 miles will be caught in the nuclear meltdown.

You know as well as I do that some losses are acceptable for science.

And your demise is something I find quite acceptable.

The only one who's losing here today is you, Drenkov!

Your time as a hero... In fact, all your time is up, Banner.

We have to stop the meltdown.

It's already too late.

[laughing]

[Drenkov laughing]

[groaning]

Thor, lightning blitz!

No need to destroy the Avengers.

The reactor will do that for me.

It's about to go critical.

I'll shut it down.

There's gotta be an emergency backup.

Banner, there's no safe distance now.

We could use whatever you have left in that muscle-suit.

Muscle won't stop this.

We have to override the meltdown sequence.

Tried. Can't be overridden.

Then go deeper.

Activate back door safeguard protocols.

[alarm blaring]

Complete lock-out. There's no way to stop the nuclear reaction.

No, but it can be cooled down.

Just like I was. The East River! It's not far.

We can divert it into the adjacent tunnels.

Even the Hulk can't punch a river.

But I can.

Remote control punch. Not bad.

Need to calculate the exact blast point.

[digital warp]

[target beeping]

Smash!

Iron Man: It worked.

computer: Reactor temperature stable.

This will happen, Banner! You cannot stop it.

[sighs] Whew.

Great work.

Never do that again.

What? I just saved the city.

Even with that suit, you're not the Hulk.

Maybe when I use my brain, I'm better than the Hulk.

Tony's right. Until we figure out how to help you Hulk out again, let the rest of the Avengers take care of this.

If all you want me for is muscle, why don't I just invent you a teched-up battering ram?

Think this is funny, Goldilocks?

I do. But it was good to see my old friend back in action.

I'm not your experimental toy.

And we're not playing.

Falcon, how are those embers doing?

Weird. According to this, your gamma signature's back to its original level.

You could have changed back into Hulk during the fight?

Why didn't you?

Because I didn't need to.

I could tell when the gamma particles had finally powered up again, but when I heard Drenkov say that I was only a hero because I was lucky...

Luck didn't stop that reactor, but I did.

But what if the suit hadn't worked as you planned?

And your stingers are better protection?

There's a brain inside the muscle.

Why can't anyone see that?

Because it's who you are, Bruce. You have one catchphrase: "Smash!"

You're on this team because you're the strongest there is.

The Avengers already have a smartest there is, and that's me.

Maybe the fact that I can be strong and smart just scares you all.

I need some air.

[grunts] Hey, watch it.

He's my favorite, Dad. The guy that smashes.

[powering up]

[quietly fires]

[gasps]

Wha...

[groans, yells]

[groans]

Drenkov: Time to wake up, Bruce.

[sighing]

[groans]

[charging up]

Huh?

I was so obsessed with recreating the experiment, that I never thought to draw straight from the source.

Now I can destroy you while I become you.

But the other guy might have a problem with that plan.

[grunting]

Huh?

Don't bother.

I'm bombarding you with gamma-inhibiting particles.

You won't be "Hulking out" anytime soon.

This device will extract the gamma directly from you, store it and then channel it into me.

With SteelCorps' tech and the Hulk's power, I will be the hero I should have been all along.

[screaming]

Don't worry, the pain will soon be gone, because draining every bit of gamma radiation will leave you quite dead.

[groaning]

It is almost complete.

Finally, after all these years...

It's mine! The life force of the Hulk.

[screaming]

[sighs]

Excuse me, I'm looking for a lost science bro. Have you seen him?

Huh. These things aren't so bright.

[both groan]

What was that again?

[arrow whooshes]

Cover me. I'm goin' for Bruce.

You look tired. Take a seat!

[crackling]

Path is clear, Widow.

Not totally accurate.

Hawkeye, hit somewhere good.

[arrow whooshes]

That's it!

[grunts]

You'll have to take this from here, genius.

Thanks.

Widow: On my way, Cap.

[crackling]

[groans]

All the gamma radiation is mine. I won't be stopped! Not now!

[groans, growls]

Incoming!

SteelCorps! Move the gamma battery to the secure lab.

I'm more than strong enough to take on the Avengers.

[grunts]

[groans]

I believe that belongs to me.

[grunts]

[groans]

[panting]

[groaning]

Huh?

I can hack this lock. Then what?

"Puny Banner" rushes in?

No. They rush out here!

computer: Radiation leak. Explosion imminent. Evacuate at once. Repeat... Radiation leak! Explosion imminent. Evacuate at once. Radiation leak. Explosion imminent. Evacuate at once. Repeat... Radiation leak!

[grunts]

Explosion imminent. Evacuate at once.

[grunts, groans]

Evacuate. Evacuate.

Refocusing gamma signature. Here we go.

They need me... All parts of me.

Without the scientist, I couldn't have gotten in here, and without the big guy, I'm not getting out!

[yelling, roaring]

[roaring continues]

[creaking]

[Hulk roars]

[groaning]

[groans]

[groans]

Your weapons are...

What would Hulk say...

Puny.

[grunts]

[groans]

[creaking]

[groaning]

[grunts]

[groaning]

All those who scorned Igor Drenkov should see me now, besting an Asgardian.

One good hit does not win the battle.

[grunts]

[groans]

[groans]

[laughs]

Even the great Iron Man cowers in fear.

I don't cower from anything.

[groans]

Hulk is back, and needs to smash!

[roars]

It doesn't matter how hard you fight back.

You've already been beaten.

[groans]

[grunts]

[groans]

[both groaning]

[groans]

[groaning continues]

I'm just getting started.

[groans]

When I gain your remaining gamma powers, the world will celebrate me as its greatest hero.

You're missing one thing that I still have.

A team!

[lasers firing]

[grunts]

[grunts]

[roars]

[grunts]

We need a plan.

Quiet! Hulk is... thinking!

That inhibitor... drainer... er... thing.

That machine will take away his gamma powers.

Let's see what a couple of Bruce Banner arrows can do to him.

[grunts]

[groans]

[groans]

[grunts]

[groans]

[groans]

[grunts]

[groans]

[grunts]

[creaking]

Now!

[screaming]

No! I'm so close.

[groans]

[grunts]

[grunting]

[groaning]

This is why you could never be a hero. [groans]

Real power comes from inside...

From who you really are.

From all parts of who you are!

[groaning]

[groaning]

Ah, that hurt.

So, does this mean you're back to being human again?

For the moment. I figure I can use my smashing downtime to pick up your slack in the smartest there is department.

Thought we settled that.

You strongest. Me smartest.

Oh, yeah? Then how'd you miss the cosign value on that formula?

Hm?

I'll fix it for you.

Ow.

[muscles expanding]

Whoops.

You're not so smart after I'm done smashing you!

[Hulk roars]

Come back here, Tony!

[cat meows]