Gorzoth

Mr. Pickles: Season: 3 - Episode: 5

[incomplete & unfixed/messed]


 * [GRUNTING] At last, the Cave of the Gorzoth.
 * Now I can open the door to the riches of the ancients.
 * Yes, but first, how about a visit to the gift shop? What? Guarding the Cave of the Gorzoth doesn’t pay much, so I’ve got a little side business going.
 * Key chain? T-shirt? Corn dog? What? I don’t want a corn dog, you idiot.
 * I want riches! Oh! My Gorzoth! Oh, no! Aah! Ooh! My Gorzoth!
 * [intro]
 * Mm.
 * [HUMS] - So - Hi! - Aah! - Morning, Goodmans! I got lots of products today.
 * - Sorry, Linda.
 * - Huh? Things are a little tight for us right now.
 * And we’re not the only ones.
 * Well, I’d better get off to work.
 * Don’t buy anything, dear, or I’ll kill you.
 * [CHUCKLES] Ah.
 * Anyway I got a fish tank, this baseball glove, and this shiny thingy.
 * - $2 each.
 * - Huh.
 * That looks like it has something to do to with Mr. Pickle
 * - [BARKING]
 * - No, I saw it first.
 * I’ll take it, whatever it is.
 * - It’s a ball.
 * - What? - Come on, ball.
 * - Tommy.
 * Let’s go play ball.
 * [LAUGHS] Anyway, all proceeds go to help the homeless.
 * Really? Then I’ll take it.
 * Anything to help you get a home.
 * Wait, what? You think I’s homeless? - Oh! - What? Um Oh, why would you think I’m homeless? Oh! Oh, I didn’t know you had so much money.
 * You hurt my feelings, Ms.
 * Goodman.
 * I’m sorry.
 * Cheer up.
 * How? Well, buying stuff always cheers me up.
 * Buying stuff? I like that idea.
 * Come on, girl.
 * We’re going shopping.
 * I just [BOTH LAUGH] Wanna have fun Ah! Fun, fun, fun, fun Ooh! So let your hair fall down Today we do what we want We’re gonna soak up the sun Whooo! Ew! Ooh.
 * [LAUGHS] We’ve only begun [LAUGHING] [BOTH LAUGHING, CHEERING] You right, Ms.
 * Goodman.
 * Buying stuff cheered me up.
 * I am so glad.
 * Uh, where are we? [GRUNTS] Linda, you got some money for us? - Sorry, I spent it all.
 * - Would you like some food? Oh, that’d be gre No! We want money.
 * - Money.
 * Money.
 * - [GRUNTING] Linda, why are these homeless people attacking us? Aah! Get off of my car! [BOTH SCREAMING] Whoa! Run, Ms.
 * Goodman! - Aaaah! - Money.
 * Money! Lost Gorzoth.
 * Will open door and give you no me riches.
 * - Yay.
 * - Afternoon, Mime.
 * What’s up, Blade? What’s up, Mr. BoJenkins?
 * Hey, Sheriff.
 * What’s with all the snacks? With the economy so bad, I’m eating all I can just in case the town runs out of snacks.
 * No, these are my snacks, Floyd.
 * - Aw.
 * - Whatever.
 * - Excuse me.
 * - Oh, what’s up? You seem to know everybody in this town.
 * - Yeah.
 * - I’m looking for a trashy woman.
 * [CHOMPING] Oh, yeah? Yes, trashy woman Do you know her? Hum.
 * [CHOMPING] Do you know Do you know her? Hum.
 * Hum.
 * [SLURPING] Quit eating snacks and answer the question, you idiot! Ah! My snacks! You’re under arrest for snack-ery.
 * No! Linda, what is going on? Money! Money! [BOTH SCREAM] Money.
 * [BOTH SCREAM] Money.
 * Money.
 * This way, Ms.
 * Goodman.
 * Linda? Oh! Oh! Linda? Linda, where are you? Aah.
 * Aah.
 * Oh! Huh? Uh, Linda, where are we? This my home.
 * - Money.
 * - Money.
 * Money.
 * Linda, your home is so interesting.
 * - Ohh! - Shh.
 * Oh.
 * Hi, Linda Jr.
 * Welcome to our home, Mrs.
 * Goodman.
 * - [MOANING] - Oh, Linda, what’s wrong? Every day I give all the money I make to the homeless.
 * - Really? - And today I failed them.
 * - Shh.
 * Mama.
 * - Money.
 * Money! See, many years ago, a man asked me to help him tie his shoe, but I didn’t, so he tripped and fell.
 * - Oh! - That is sad, but He fell through the glass of a shark tank.
 * Them sharks ate 5,000 people to deeeaaath! - Oh.
 * - Shh.
 * Ever since then, Mama Linda only feels good when she’s helping people.
 * Wow.
 * You were in a band? Oh, yeah.
 * I play good.
 * [DRUMS PLAYING] - Linda’s in here.
 * - Aah! - Money! - Oh, no! - No, Tommy.
 * - Ball, ball, ball.
 * Give that to me.
 * Tommy, please.
 * - [LAUGHING] - [BARKING] No, Mr. Pickles.
 * It’s my ball.
 * Tommy, it’s not a ball.
 * I think it’s a head.
 * Well, you can beg all you want, Grandpa, but I’m not gonna give you head.
 * Say, what? What the hell’s the matter with you? - Creepy-ass old man.
 * - What? - No.
 * I-I didn’t mean - [LAUGHS] No, Tommy! Oh, no, no.
 * Get off of me, son.
 * - TOGETHER: Money! - I wanted to help you homeless peoples, - but I spent all the mo - Money! [SCREAMING] Get back, homeless people.
 * Come on.
 * We be safe in my bedroom.
 * Oh, wow.
 * Your bedroom is actually really nice.
 * What’s wrong with the rest of my hou - Money! - Maybe we can help you get jobs.
 * Oh, yeah.
 * I’ll take a jo - We don’t want jobs.
 * - Get her organs.
 * Yeah, we’ll sell ‘em for money.
 * [LAUGHS] TOGETHER: Organs.
 * Money.
 * Linda, help.
 * Ah! I got someone to help again.
 * Oh, good.
 * - Hey, homeless.
 * - Huh? I only wanted to help you.
 * But now I got to help Ms.
 * Goodman! [GRUNTING] Mama Linda, our escape route.
 * Oh.
 * - Aaaaaaaaaaaah! - Whoooooa! - Ugh! - Oh! - Sheriff! - Oh, what’s up? The homeless, they’re after us.
 * Ms.
 * Goodman is a murderer.
 * - What? - Oh, yeah? In you go with the other criminals.
 * Linda, I don’t understand.
 * Now you’re safe from the homeless forever.
 * - Wha No, I’m innocent.
 * - Uh-oh.
 * [STOMACH GURGLING] Um, I got to go do some emergency pooper work uh, paperwork.
 * You’re the one who took my Gorzoth.
 * Your what-zoth? Gorzoth, you idiot.
 * You know, it’s a golden head.
 * It opens up the door to the riches of the ancients.
 * Oh, I sold that for $2.
 * $2?! Well, if I take you to it, will you share some of them riches with the homeless people? Yes.
 * Yes.
 * Ohh.
 * [FARTING] Ohh, boy.
 * - Tommy, give that to me.
 * - No.
 * No, it’s mine.
 * - W-Whoa! - Oh, Tommy.
 * - My Gorzoth.
 * - They went in here.
 * This man will give you riches as soon as Mrs.
 * Goodman, you’re under arrest for murder.
 * - Oh, she ain’t no murderer.
 * - Oh, okay.
 * Hey, what’s going on here? - Uhh.
 * - Uhh.
 * These homeless people’s trying to get These aren’t homeless people.
 * Huh? That’s Mr. Withersby, the doctor.
 * When the economy crashed, I needed your extra money to pay for my tanning bed.
 * What? And that’s Mr. Plimpton, the real-estate mogul.
 * I needed extra money to pay for my body modifications.
 * Oh, hey, what’s up, Jill? I mean, being an astronaut bought my mansion, but Linda’s money pays for the pool boys.
 * So, none of y’all is homeless? TOGETHER: Nope.
 * Wait, uh, I-I actually am homeless.
 * Here I was, feeling bad, and none of y’all homeless? I am.
 * Just ‘cause y’all can’t buy your fancy things don’t mean you can’t be happy.
 * Look at the Goodmans.
 * This place is a wreck.
 * They ain’t got nothing.
 * - Well, Linda - Nothing! People gots to start learning to be happy with what they got.
 * Yeah, if these people can be happy with their pathetic lives, then so can we.
 * - Yeah! - They do have nothing.
 * - That’s not true.
 * I have this - Gorzoth! Now I shall open the door to the riches of the ancients.
 * TOGETHER: Riches? Riches! Riches, riches! Hey, uh, how’d you like a job back at the station? I got a big case that needs unclogging.
 * Oh, that’d be great.
 * Honey, I’m home? Hi, Dad.
 * Everybody, come to my house.
 * Linda gonna cook up some trash stew.
 * Wow, first a job and now a meal? Now if I could just find a nice woman.
 * Mmm.
 * Maybe I could help.
 * Sheriff: Ew.
 * Together: Riches! Riches!
 * Now, how do I open the door to the riches of the ancients? Place the Gorzoth there.
 * Yes.
 * Or how about a visit to the gift shop? Key chain? T-Shirt? Corn dog? What? No, you idiot.
 * I want riches.
 * Together: Riches! Riches! It worked.
 * The riches, they’re in here. Huh? Hey, it’s just a bunch of heads.
 * But in ancient times, heads were considered very valuable. Master, your money’s no good here.
 * [BARKS]
 * Well, if you insist. One jar of pickles That will be 25 heads.
 * - [BARKS]
 * - At last, the Gorzoth! [LAUGHS]