The Legend of the Kuro Kabuto

[light switches flipping.] Alexander the Great's breastplate. The spear of destiny. Excalibur. Is most greatest collection of all time, da? But is missing one thing. Shredder's helmet. The legendary Kuro Kabuto. If someone could obtain for me, I maybe Forget terrible past misdeed, huh? So, if I steal the helmet, you'll forgive me for my little mistake? [Growls.] "Little mistake"? You shoot me in eyeball. Not on purpose. Anyway, you got that cool new eye. You used to be just another arms dealer, but now it's like, oooh, check out the cool eyeball guy. I should pop your head like blueberry. Relax, Steranko. I'll get you that helmet. Is in Shredder's lair, highest security. Tell me, Mr. Zeck, why you think you can steal it? See your spear of destiny there? Da? Lick it. [Grunts.] Is made of marzipan. I stole the real one yesterday. [Grunts.] Just watch step. I have sent five men to steal the helmet, one after other. Nobody ever come back. That Shredder, he has eyes in back of head. [Laughs.] Those eyes won't do him much good. [Laughs.] [Tv playing in background.] Pizza's here. Huh? You got one pizza? I'm like a twopizzasallbymyself guy. Would you relax? [Munching.] Pizza is mine. Booyakasha! Mikey! I cannot believe you'd do that. Ah! Where's the pizza? How can you guys fool around like this when Karai needs our help? Ugh, not this again. We have to rescue her. Look, maybe she believes Splinter is her father, but she was still raised by Shredder. You think she's gonna turn on him just like that? Yes, I do. Now am I the leader of this team or not? [Grunts.] - More or less. - More or less? So I'm only the leader until I tell you to do something you don't want to? Ugh, fine. I'm gonna check out Shredder's lair, see if it has any weak points. Wait. We'll come with you. But this doesn't mean we're going in. Pizza. Pizza. Pizza? Pizza? [Gasps.] Ahh! Come on. [Groans.] [Metal scraping.] [Door creaking.] [Door slams.] Karai. You must know I never wanted this to happen. Splinter is your father, yes. But it would've been wrong to allow you to be brought up by scum like him. I did what I had to do, what I knew was right. I I hope that one day you will understand that. [Door slams.] [Laser activates.] [Electronic beeping.] Let's do this like Brutus. Footbots, search the place. Snap dizzle. Aww yeah, come to papa. [Robots chatter.] Someone stole the Kabuto. [Growls.] I can't see him, but I can smell him. [Sniffs.] [Grunts.] [Groans.] Dang, he's even worse than Steranko said he was. Footbots, destroy him. [Robots chatter.] Yee hoo. Oh! Come on, come on, come on. Oh! Boom! Ow! Hah, what's that supposed to [Grunts.] Just a little glue. No hard feelings, Zombie Wolf. [Grunts.] I'm just doing my job. Woohoo! [Grunts.] [Growls.] Eehehee! Bradford, what is going on here? [Grunts.] I'm sorry, Master Shredder. He he got your helmet. "Anton Zeck: Master thief. " [Grunts.] Get me Everyone! I'm thinking we might have better luck if we tunnel up from underneath Shredder's lair. Ooh, what if we tunnel down from above? That'll really confuse 'em. You can't tunnel down from ugh! We're not tunneling from anywhere. We can't do this. Karai was raised by Shredder. She's one of the bad guys. [Alert beeping.] Huh? Is that a guy? Leo, hit the brakes. Hit the brakes! [Metal thud.] [Groans.] [Electronic chirping.] What did we hit? A guy. An invisible guy! He only showed up on infrared. Is this a Kraang thing? No idea. We'd better find him. [Robots chatter in distance.] Guys, you aren't going to believe this. [Gasp.] Huh? Well, tonight just got interesting. What's the plan? Oh, you know, kick, punch, stab. Right in my wheelhouse, brah. [Robot chatters.] [Grunts.] [Grunts.] Come and get some, sucka fool. [Grunts.] Let's get out of here. Booyakasha! Raph, you got that helmet? You know it. [Grunts.] [Electronic beeping.] [Laughs.] Zeck is coming after you, my ectothermic friends. You will find my helmet. Until it is returned to me, you will do nothing else. Nothing! Uh, Master Shredder, can't you just get another helm [Groans.] That helmet, the Kuro Kabuto, has been the symbol of The Foot Clan for over 1,500 years. The clan's founder himself, the dreaded Koga Takuza, was said to be the greatest ninja in the history of Japan. His skill with a blade was greater than any Samurai. Takuza laid waste to warriors and rulers alike. He stole the sacred totems of his defeated enemies and fused them into an alloy stronger than Steel. He himself forged the Kabuto, and it has survived undamaged to this day. I am sworn to protect it with my life. You will find it, and you will bring it to me. Understand? Ew uh Yes, Master. Xever, you go with the fly. Tiger Claw, go with Bradford. Do not fail me. I promise you, the consequences will be dire. We'd better get that helmet back. Otherwise we'll have to keep looking at Shredder's gross face. [Buzzing.] Blech, he looks worse than you. [Buzzing angrily.] Don't get mad at me. You know you look nasty. [Buzzing sadly.] [Sniffs.] The scent is faint, but I think he went this way. [Sniffs.] This way. [Jetpack blasting.] He's on foot. But he's got [Sniffs.] Devices. Electric motors, faint whiff of ozone. [Growls.] You've got a good sense of smell for a cat. We are warriors. Can't we fight side by side without letting species get in the way? Absolutely. Xever is always saying, "oh, Tiger Claw must hate you, because you're a dog. " That's ridiculous. I know, right? Although I do want to eat him because he's a fish. I want to eat him just to shut him up. This is perfect. Perfect! Yeah! Wait, what? Shredder's helmet. We can trade it for Karai. You're delusional, you know that? Ha ha! Hello there, reptile buddies. How many times does Karai have to try to kill us before you get that she's not on our side? You're wrong about her, Raph. [Device powering up.] Oooh. Hooo. Wow to the wow. [Cackles.] [Growls.] There are so many freaks around here. This town is really going downhill. They have the Kabuto. So we get to retrieve Shredder's helmet and crack some shells. Life is good. [Roars.] [Grunts.] [Grunts.] Don't let 'em get the helmet. [Metal clashing.] [Growls.] [Grunts.] [Grunts.] [Whimpers.] Come on. Heads up, Dee, hot potato. Got it. [Grunts.] [Grunts.] [Metal clang.] [Buzzing.] I believe you have something we need. Deodorant? [Grunts.] Got it. [Whines.] [Grunts.] [Whines.] D'oh! Ahh! Ahh! [Grunts.] [Yells.] Hey! Watch it, Buzzkill. [Buzzing.] Ooh, Buzzkill. That's totally what we should've called him. [Yells.] Dude's got a gazillion eyes. You'd think his aim would be better. [Structure creaking.] All: [Gasping.] [All yelling.] Nooo! [Groans.] [Grunts.] Ugh, Leo, is that you? It's no use, Leo. Just go. Save Karai. -We'll take care of ourselves. - Got it. Freaks, I got your helmet! You two, finish the Turtles. We'll get the Kabuto. Come and get me, losers. Rawr! Over there. Smooth. [Sniffs.] Is that Ugh! Diapers! [Crashing.] [Grunts.] [Laughs maniacally.] Hee hee. Hoo hoo. Heh. This what you're after, hmm? [Grunts.] [Blow landing.] [Grunts.] [Roaring in distance.] Nice haircut, buddy. Here's your bag. Now have fun with your friends. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Aw, man. They messed the plug up. He has the helmet. You know this is going to hurt, right? You don't scare me. All I have to do is drop this bag, and you fools will never find me. [Device malfunctions.] Uhh anybody got any doublea batteries? Anybody? [Grunts.] [Growls.] Just don't bust my sunglasses, okay? They're kind of like my thing. [Gunfire.] Wow to the wow. [Laughs.] [Laughs.] [Buzzing whine.] You got it, the helmet? It's my thing. Of course I got it. [Sniffs.] Why am I smelling the baby poops? I going to pop your head like blueberry. You know, that's to be expected. [Suspenseful music.] Why does the fly walk into the spider's web? Because all the spider's henchmen are out. Ah. You've come to make a trade? The helmet for Karai. Very well. She'll have to be brought up from the dungeon. You raised her from infancy and now you lock her in a cell? How can you do that? In any conflict, the winner is the one who is prepared to do what the loser is not. [Grunts.] Let me go. Now, the Kuro Kabuto. How do I know you won't attack me as soon as I give you the helmet? Of course I'm going to attack you. Did you think you were getting out of this without a fight? [Roars.] [Grunts.] [Grunts.] Ugh, pathetic. [Grunts.] But that is to be expected when your Sensei is a weakwilled coward like Splinter. You never should've tried to do this alone. He didn't. Guys! Couldn't let you have all the fun. And none of us wants to tell Splinter we didn't try to save his daughter. Now let's take shredhead down. [Grunts.] [Grunts.] Give me that helmet. [Grunts.] [Grunts.] [Karate yells.] You fools really believe you can defeat me? No. But we kept you busy long enough to get Karai. [Snarls.] You'll never get out of here alive. You want it? Take it! What? [Screams in agony.] Hehehehehe. Thanks, guys. We had to come, Leo. You're the leader, right? Eh, more or less. Now, let's get her out of this sack. [On recording.] Let me go. All: [Yells.] That's not Karai. - Let me go! - It's a bomb! Let me go, let me go Not cool. Move! All: [Yelling.

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