Average-ers / Crash Cab

(Starts at the base... where Pokie is unexpected to appear... and Hulk goes on an unexpected rampage for more screen time.)

Nick Fury: Professor Selvig! Hawkeye! How's the cube?

Professor Selvig: Just fine, Director Fury.

Nick Fury: Really. Cause it looks like it's about to unleash EVIL into this world!

Professor Selvig: Oh, THAT cube. I thought you meant (holds a rubiks cube) this one. Yeah, That one's ready to blow.

Hawkeye: I'll stop it!

(Hawkeye stops the winding and out pops Pokie)

Pokie: SURPRISE!

Nick Fury: GET HIM!

(Pokie pokes Professor Selvig, Hawkeye, and two gaurds)

Pokie: Poke, poke, poke, poke, steal!

Four Evil Poked Guys: AAAAAAHHHH!

Nick Fury: We need to get that cube back! But it's gonna take someone EXTRORDINARY!

Phil Coulson: Uhh, Superman's actually busy at the moment.

Nick Fury: How about someone REALLY GOOD?

Phil Coulson: Batman has his own movie this year.

Nick Fury: WELL?! WHO DO WE HAVE?!

(Title card: Average-ers)

Captain America: Captain America reporting for the Average-ers, sir!

Nick Fury: Good. A power source with unimaginable strengh is been stolen by a guy named Pokie.

Captain America: Um, Pretty sure his name is Loki.

Nick Fury: Were you here?! Do you see all the poking he was doing? I like MY name better!

Captain America: Where is he now?

Black Widow: Doing what all super villians do, a speaking tour.

(At the "Three Lo-Keys To Happiness" tour)

Pokie: And that's why I will one day rule you all! Any questions?

Old Man: Yeah, I came in late. Has the Hulk shown up yet?

Pokie: No, because we need EXPOSITION!

Captain America: Alright Pokie! You're coming with Captain America!

Iron Man: Not so fast! He's coming with IRON MAN!

Thor: Nah! Pokie is coming with THOR!

Old Man: How about Hulk? Can the Hulk show up NOW?

Captain America, Iron Man, Thor: NO, NOT YET!

(Back at base)

Nick Fury: Good work, team! Pokie is now our prisoner!

Black Widow: Wait...That's been his plan all along. To get on board and get Bruce angry so he turns into the Hulk!

Nick Fury: How can you tell?

Black Widow: Cause he's making him watch Annoying Orange.

Bruce Banner: Did you say angry or bored?

(On board a fighter jet)

Professor Selvig: Hawkeye, our evil eyes means we're a team now, how do you plan on getting Pokie out of that ship? Hammer? Shield? Repulsar rays?

Hawkeye: Better! I have an arrow!

Professor Selvig: Best of luck to you.

(Launches rocket, which rips apart the ship)

Nick Fury: THE SHIP IS BEING RIPPED APART!!

Black Widow: Is it the Hulk?

Nick Fury: No. Luckilly we got Bruce AWAY from Pokie just in time!

(Another room.)

Captain America: How are you feeling?

Bruce Banner: Fine.

Tony Stark: Good! Cause we got to suit up and get ready for the final battle!

Bruce Banner: Wait, the movie's almost OVER?! (goes angry) HULK'S HARDLY IN IT!

(Bruce turns into the Hulk)

Hulk: Give Hulk less screen time than ''everyone else! ''(Slams Cap and Tony)

(JUST THEN...)

Hulk: (While running behing Black Widow) Make Hulk run behind Scarlett Johannson!

(Cuts to Stan Lee and some other guy)

Stan Lee: Excel--

Hulk: (Beats down Stan Lee) Give Stan Lee more screen time than Hulk!

(Hulk runs to the Whedon house)

Hulk: (Beats down Joss Whedon) Give Firefly only one season!

(Back at base)

Phil Coulson: Has anyone seen Mark Ruffalo? I want to get him to sign my Edward Norton Hulk DVD.

(Hulk barges in)

Hulk: Let Norton have his whole movie as Hulk, will ya?!

(Phil Coulson goes through a portal, and...)

BLAM!

Iron Man: Look at that. Thanks to Coulson, we banded together and Pokie was destroyed.

Black Widow: But that's not how...

Iron Man: Trust me, it's the same thing. Just quicker.

Bruce Banner: What happened?

Hawkeye: Well I turned good again, the villian was destroyed, and now were a team just in time for the credits.

Bruce Banner: Wait! The movie's OVER?! (goes angry again) HULK'S HARDLY IN IT!!

(Bruce Banner turns into the Hulk)

Hulk: HULK WANT MORE SCREEN TIME!!

(Hulk crashes the camera and segment ends)

(The Avengers are eating lunch.)

Hulk: (calmly) Okay, that's enough time.