What Are We?

YOU ARE NOW HYPNOTIZED. WE ARE NOW HYPNOTIZED. OOH, GOOD. HEH HEH. WHEN YOU WAKES FROM SLEEPY TIME, YOU WILL NO LONGER BE ZANY. YOU WILL BE CALM CHILDREN WHO LIKE TO SI AND BE REALLY QUIET. NOW WAKE UP. ARE YOU STILL ZANY? ONLY OUR HAIRDRESSER KNOWS FOR SURE. STOP THAT! SIT DOWN! NOTHING I TRY WORKS WITH YOU KIDS. I'M THINK YOU'RE NOT NORMAL. I'M AS NORMAL AS THE NEXT KID! ME, TOO. ME, THREE! NO! WHAT ARE YOU? LOOK AT YOU WITH THOSE EARS AND TAILS! THAT'S NOT NORMAL. I MEAN, WHAT ARE YOU? WELL MAYBE WE ARE DOGS CUTE LITTLE DOGS, WITH EARS WOOF! WOOF! [PANTING] AND LITTLE TAILS THAT WE CAN WAG HEY, LET'S GO FETCH HIS SLIPPERS AND PLAY TAG HEY! GET OFF OF ME! MAYBE I'M A CAT WHAT DO YA THINK OF THAT? A LOVELY CAT THA ALL THE WORLD ADORES AND HERE'S MY KITTY PAWS WITH LITTLE KITTY CLAWS WHICH I LIKE TO SHARPEN ON YOUR COUCH AAH! THAT'S NOT FUNNY! MAYBE I'M A BUNNY HOPPIN' ROUND HERE HAPPY AS I PLEASE OR PENGUINS AND IT'S COLD WHICH MAKES YOU SNEEZE AH-CHOO! I'VE GOT IT, OF COURSE MAYBE I'M A HORSE I CAN LIVE ON OATS AND HAY AND LAUGH AND RUN AND JUMP AND PLAY AND YOU CAN RIDE ON ME ALL DAY NO WAY! HEY, MAYBE I'M A SKUNK OH, BOY! YOU REALLY STINK! A DINOSAUR MIGHT BE SOME FUN BUT THEN YOU'D BE EXTINCT. MAYBE WE'RE ALL INSECTS DO YOU LIKE BUGS AND BEES? YOU KIDS ARE BUGGY IN THE HEAD! MAYBE WE'RE GIAN FLEAS YAAH! MAYBE AN ELECTRIC EEL A SEAL GET REAL! HEY, WAIT A MINUTE, I GOT IT NOW YES, I DO YOU DO? WE'RE NOT BEES, AND WE'RE NOT CATS OR BUGS OR HORSES OR THINGS LIKE THAT WHAT WE ARE IS CLEAR AND ABSOLUTE WHAT WE ARE, DEAR DOCTOR IS CUTE I'M SORRY I ASKED.

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