Oh, Holiday Cheese

Transcript for Oh, Holiday Cheese
Narrator: It's the holiday season, and the city is shining from all the bright festive lights. Ahh, I love this time of year.

(Scene: A street in the city.  Street lamps have decorations strung between them, with white ice sculptures between them.  A man walks by carrying a stack of wrapped presents.  Christmas-style music is playing in the background.  Suddenly, the lights flicker and go out.)

Narrator: Uh-oh. Who invited the Energy Monster?

(The Energy Monster is shown sucking up a strand of lights.on one side of the road. It gleefully moves on to its next target.  WordGirl and Huggy show up.  She picks up one of the ice sculptures and hovers with it.)

WordGirl: Everybody loves a little snow for the holidays!

(She slams her fist into it and pulverizes it. The snow falls down onto the Energy Monster, and it shrinks down.  WordGirl snatches it up, puts it inside a plastic star, and puts it on top of the city's Christmas/holiday tree.)

Narrator:  Back at the Botsford house, they're getting ready for a party.

(Scene: The Botsford living room.  TJ is looking out the front window with a gloomy expression.  Mrs. Botsford is busy unpacking holiday decorations.)

Mrs. Botsford: OH! Here it is... I found it! The Botsford family cheese platter. The centerpiece of the whole  festivity .

Mr. Botsford: And I got the gouda!

(He comes in carrying a large cheese wheel wrapped in a red ribbon, which he drops onto the floor.)

Mrs. Botsford: Your idea for making cheese the theme of our holiday party is sure gonna make it one doozie of a celebration!

(Mr. Botsford does a little celebration dance, then looks over at TJ staring out the window.)

Mr. Botsford: Hey, TJ-- what are you looking at?

TJ: Nothing. That's the problem. I wanted it to snow for the holiday party.

Mr. Botsford: Well, we may not have snow, but we DO have... cheese!

TJ: Ugh, cheese isn't snow, Dad.

Mr. Botsford: Oh, don't be such a  curmudgeon , TJ. We all would love it to snow for the holiday. But you can't force it to snow. Now, help your sister and Bob make festive shapes. We have a lot to do before our party guests arrive.

Mrs. Botsford: Oh, I hope I didn't forget to invite anyone.

Narrator: Meanwhile, at Dr. Two-Brains' lair, a certain villain is on the lookout for some holiday mischief.

(Scene: Dr. Two-Brains' warehouse lair.  On top of the building, a periscope is surveying the area, with a menacing-looking pink eye visible through the lens.)

Dr. Two-Brains: You henchmen are so thoughtful. I absolutely LOVE the giant periscope! Best present you ever bought for me. How did you know?

Henchman 1: 	WE bought you a giant periscope?

Dr. Two-Brains: Well, I know how hard it is to buy me presents, so I bought the periscope for myself, but I used your money to pay for it. So it's your gift to me. Thank you!

Henchman 1: So... did you get Charlie and me a gift?

Dr. Two-Brains: Eh... let's see what the citizens of this fine city are doing this holiday season. Up periscope!

(As Charlie and Henchman 1 mope over not getting a gift, Dr. Two-Brains aims the periscope around the city, starting with the nearby buildings, and then switching to a suburban neighborhood, where he zooms in on the Botsford home.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Ah! A party. And it's full of delicious holiday cheese!

Henchman 1: Gee, boss. Why don't we have our own cheese party? It would be a good chance for you to give Charlie and me our holiday presents.

Dr. Two-Brains: That's it! We'll have our own cheese  festivity ! Uh, what do we serve? Oh-- cheese balls, cheese dip, uh...

Henchman 1: And presents?

Dr. Two-Brains: Em... and I'll make my special punch! It's a mix of liquid cheese and a very special ingredient.

Henchman 1: Love?

Dr. Two-Brains: No... more cheese! Now, to come up with a way to steal the holiday cheese supply. (Evil laugh)

Henchman 1: (looking at Charlie)  What a  curmudgeon .

Narrator: Later that evening at the Botsfords...

(Scene: the Botsford living room, viewed through the front window.  Mr. and Mrs. Botsford are decorating the tree with "cheesy" ornaments, and TJ is still looking out the window with a frown.)

Mr. Botsford: Who wants to sing a holiday carol?

Mrs. Botsford: (screaming with joy)  AAH!

Becky: Yes!

TJ: I don't!  I want it to snow!

Mr. Botsford: TJ, are you still being a  curmudgeon ?

TJ: Huh?

Becky: I'll take it from here. Ahem-- a  curmudgeon  is someone who acts grouchy, like you're acting right now. A  curmudgeon 's attitude takes the fun out of everything.

TJ: I just don't think the party's gonna be any good without snow.

Becky: Bingo!

Mr. Botsford: I have an idea-- why don't you sing with us, TJ? Come on.

Mrs. Botsford: (putting a sock cap onto Tim)  Ooh, yes!

TJ: Ah... okay, but I won't like it.

Mr. Botsford: Okay, everyone! On three-- a one, and a two, and a four, and a three...

(TJ picks up a songbook and joins them by the tree. They all start singing a song to the tune of "Oh Christmas Tree")

Everyone: Oh, holiday cheese, oh holiday cheese,  /  You are so very yummy! / Oh, holiday cheese, oh holiday cheese,  /  Please get inside my tummy! / We liked you cubed, or in a ball  /  Fry it up, we like it all! / Oh, holiday cheese, oh holiday cheese,  /  The theme of our  festivity !

Mr. Botsford: Ha-ha-ha-ha!

TJ: It worked! My  curmudgeon ly-ness is totally gone!

Mrs. Botsford: That just warms the cockles of my heart.

Mr. Botsford: It makes me think we should go on the road as a singing group.

Mrs. Botsford: Let's tour.

Becky, TJ and Bob: YEAH!

Mrs. Botsford: Woooo!

Narrator: Woo-hoo-hoo! Ha-ha! Ooh, yay--

(The family looks up at the narrator.)

Narrator: Mmm-- meanwhile, back at Dr. Two-Brains' lair...

(Scene: The roof of Two-Brain's lair, showing the periscope looking around again.  The scene cuts to the inside.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Now it's time to execute my plan to swipe all the holiday cheese in the city! Hahahaha! No one could ever guess what this plan is in a million years.

Henchman 1: Well, it looks like you just took your old transport ray and attached it to the periscope, so you'll be able to transport what you see in the periscope right back here to headquarters.

Dr. Two-Brains: (frustrated)  Oh-- that was a lucky guess! Let's see if it works.

(He looks through the periscope. The mayor is walking down a sidewalk carrying a replica of city hall carved out of cheese.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Uh-huh... ooh, Happy Holidays, Mr. Mayor! Allow me to help you with that magnificent cheese sculpture of city hall.

(He presses a button on the periscope controls, sending a transport ray toward the Mayor. The cheese sculpture vanishes.)

Mayor: What? Who? I just-- uhh!

(Back at the warehouse, the transport ray deposits the sculpture onto a box next to Two-Brains.)

Dr. Two-Brains: It worked! It really, really worked!-- eh, like I knew it would.

Narrator: Back at the Botsfords, the par-teh is getting start-tehd.

(Scene: The Botsford living room.  Violet and Mrs. Heaslip are there, along with Mr. and Mrs. Ming, Grandpa Ming, and Scoops.  TJ and Bob are eating cheese.  Mr. Botsford comes in with a camera.)

Mr. Botsford: Okay, cheese dishes-- say "people"! Ha-ha-ha! I just-- ha-- I just told the cheese to say people, because when you take a picture of people, you tell them to say "cheese"! Get it?

(The doorbell rings, and Mrs. Botsford goes to the door.)

Mrs. Botsford: Ha-ha-ha-ha! Oh-ho-ho-ho! Oh, you-- oh, good one honey. Your sense of humor is one of my favorite parts of any  festivity .

(She opens the door to greet Edith Von Hoosinghaus, who is carrying a cheese sculpture shaped like a large diamond,)

Edith:  Festivities ? I thought this was a party.

Becky:  Festivity  means a party, or happy celebration. As in, the Botsfords are hosting a super-fun holiday  festivity .

Edith: Well-- thank you, young lady. (Hands the cheese sculpture to Becky, and pats her on the head.) Now, uh, go, go and place my priceless cheese diamond with the other dishes so it can be in the photograph.

(Mr. Botsford holds up the camera to snap a picture, and most of the guests stand there smiling. Suddenly there is an explosion of light inside the room, and when it goes away, all of the cheese has disappeared.  The tree falls over.)

Mr. Botsford: Sweet vanishing Roquefort! What just happened?

Mrs. Botsford: Our cheese table--

Edith: It's gone! (deep intake of breath) We've been robbed! What kind of  curmudgeon  would do such a thing?! Fainting.

(She collapses into Mrs. Botsford's arms.)

Mr. Botsford: I-- I don't understand! Who would want to ruin our  festivities  so much that they'd take our cheese?

Becky: (to Bob)  I have a pretty good idea. Let's go, Bob.

''(She takes off with Bob through the front door unnoticed.)

(Scene: back at Two-Brain's lair.  All of the stolen cheese is piled onto the table.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Bwah-ha-ha-ha-ha! All the cheese is mine! MINE! This is the greatest holiday ever! Ooh, I'm merry as a school boy!

Narrator: Will Dr. Two-Brains' periscope ray ruin the  festivities ? Will WordGirl arrive in time to save the day? Will it be a cheeseless holiday?

Dr. Two-Brains: Not for me, it won't!  Ha-ha! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-- come on, guys, laugh. Wah-ha-ha-ha!

(The henchmen make a forced attempt to laugh along with him.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Put your backs into it!

Henchman 1: Oooo-aaah! Ha- ha-ha.

''(Scene: The Botsford living room.  The mayor has joined them, and is reading from a stack of cards.)'

Mayor: I declare this party officially ruined.

(Everybody mopes.)

Unknown person (possibly Grandpa Ming): Ain't that the truth?

Mr. Ming: I could have declared that.

Mr. Botsford: Now, wait a second. We're not gonna let a  curmudgeon ly cheese thief turn us into a group of  curmudgeon s, are we?

(The sounds of low-level chatter.)

Mr. Botsford: Don't you see? Elegant cheese sculptures don't make the holiday special. People are what really make the holiday special!

Mrs. Botsford: He's right. We can't let this ruin our holiday spirit.

Mayor: What should we do?

Mrs. Botsford: I'm gonna start roasting nuts... and I'm going to do it on an open fire!

Mr. Botsford: Good idea!

TJ: (holding up the song book)  Maybe we should sing a song.

Mr. Botsford: TJ... you are now the OPPOSITE of a  curmudgeon ! This party is back on!

(Everyone cheers.)

Narrator: Back at Dr. Two-Brains'  festivity ...

Dr. Two-Brains: Ah. So? Politics. Interesting. Don't you think?

Henchman 1: Oh, yeah. And... sports, too.

Dr. Two-Brains: Oh, I know. I'm not much for sports, but I love athletics.

Henchman 1: Heh. What about the weather? I like that.

Dr. Two-Brains: Yeah... some party, eh?

(WordGirl flies through the chimney into the lair.)

WordGirl: Not so fast, Two-Brains!

(Huggy falls out of the chimney behind her.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Well, that was a real icebreaker!

WordGirl: Sorry to break up the-- uh-- party?

Dr. Two-Brains: How nice of you to drop in on my very own cheese  festivities .

WordGirl: Gah! You can't just steal someone's holiday party and make it your own, Two-Brains.

Dr. Two-Brains: Really? Looks like I already have. Henchmen!

(Henchman 1 and Charlie step in front of them holding some type of gun. WordGirl and Huggy jump out of the way, but the henchmen manage to fire the weapons at them.  Long strands of cheese bind Huggy and WordGirl, and they end up hanging from the ceiling.)

WordGirl: Ooh-- uhh-- what is this stuff?

Dr. Two-Brains: From the makers of string cheese-- rope cheese! Ninety-nine percent stronger than string cheese, and delicious too! Ha ha ha ha! A little nip of cheese punch?

WordGirl: I think I'll pass. A little thick for me.

Dr. Two-Brains: Good. More for me.

''(He walks off, and Huggy starts sucking in the cheese rope surrounding him. WordGirl looks over at him and gets an idea.)

WordGirl: Uh, uh-uh- I'm sorry, I- I might have been too quick to judge your punch. I'd love to hear the recipe.

(Huggy continues to eat the rope as they talk, nearly freeing himself.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Well, it's a tangy blend of cheddar, mozzarella, swiss, and my special ingredient.

WordGirl: Love?

Dr. Two-Brains: No. Eww. More cheese!

(He turns around, and sees that WordGirl and Huggy are both free.)

WordGirl: Ha!

Dr. Two-Brains: Hey! You didn't really care about my punch recipe. You just used it as a diversion. And at this time of year. (He looks sad.) Well played, WordGirl.

WordGirl: Thanks.

(She sees that the henchmen are still aiming their weapons at her.)

WordGirl: You know, now that I think of it, I WILL have some punch!

(She flies over to the bowl and dumps it onto the henchmen.)

Dr. Two-Brains: The reverse button on my transport ray will send you out of here!

(WordGirl flies over to the pile of cheese on the table, picks it up and flies toward him. Two-Brains fires the transport ray toward her.  The ray causes the pile of cheese to vanish.)

Dr. Two-Brains: NO! My cheese! My beautiful cheese is gone!

WordGirl: (to Huggy)  Where'd that giant cheeseball go?

(Scene: the Botsford living room.  A big pile of cheese has appeared in the middle of the room, and Mr. Botsford rises up from it with a huge smile.)

Mr. Botsford: (gasps)  Goodness to fruitcake, it's a holiday miracle! Let's EAT!

Narrator: As one holiday party starts, another  festivity  comes to an end.

(WordGirl flies back to her house carrying Two-Brains and his henchmen, who have been tied up with cheese rope. She sets them down in front of the living room window.)

WordGirl: Since all the jails are closed for the holidays, your punishment will be watching the Botsford family enjoy that giant cheese ball.

Dr. Two-Brains: Oh, rats. I mean mice!

WordGirl: Come on, Huggy. We've got  festivities  to get to. Word UP!

(Two-Brains reaches into his pocket and holds up two tickets.)

Dr. Two-Brains: Here's your holiday present, I... hope you like it.

Henchman 1: Look, Charlie. Two tickets to the big football game. I'm gonna hug you.

Dr. Two-Brains: N- no, that's alright.

(Back inside the house, Mr. and Mrs. Botsford, the mayor, and Edith are standing in front of a mostly eaten pile of cheese.)

Mr. Botsford: That was one delicious cheeseball.

Mrs. Botsford: Everyone gather around. We're all gonna sing.

(As everyone sings, we see several amusing clips. Bob hands Becky a large present, and she hands him a small one to his dismay.  One of Tobey's robots puts a star on top of an evergreen tree outside their home, as Tobey and Mrs. McCallister watch.  Someone (possibly Chuck's mom) dressed as Santa puts a sub sandwich inside stockings over the fireplace, as Chuck and Brent watch with anticipation.  Even Two-Brains and the henchmen join and sing the song.)

Everyone: Oh, holiday cheese, oh holiday cheese, you are so very yummy. Oh, holiday cheese, oh holiday cheese, please get inside my tummy. We like you cubed or in a ball, fry it up, we like it all. Oh, holiday cheese, oh holiday cheese, it's the theme of our  festivity .

TJ: Hey everybody, it's snowing!

Narrator: And so, once again the holiday  festivities  were saved. Thanks to WordGirl, Captain Huggy Face, and a whole lot of cheese. Now, don't be a  curmudgeon -- watch the next amazing adventure of WordGirl!

(For the closing scene, WordGirl and Huggy fly in front of the camera dressed as snowmen, against a backdrop of snowflakes falling.)