Home Sweet Home

Guys, I just got the best email ever.

Yes! I knew you'd like it.

Took me two weeks to write that song.

I didn't get an email from you.

That's 'cause he accidentally sent it to me.

Oliver: ♪ I'll keep you warm ♪ ♪ Skylar Storm ♪ ♪ And when we rise above in superhero love ♪

(Turns music off)

Can you forward that to me?

Anyway, my best friend Scarlett from my home planet Caldera just emailed me. She's coming to visit.

Wait. Aliens have email?

Of course. I get so much spam from there.

I mean, who really thinks a Calderan prince is just handing out millions of dollars?

Can you forward that to me?

I'm so excited to see Scarlett.

It'll be great not being the only alien around here.

We've been living together so long, I don't think of you as an alien anymore.

Aw, really?

Yeah. To me, you're just a totally normal girl who does incredibly weird things.

So when does Scarlett get here?

(Shrieks)

Well, at least we don't have to pick her up from the airport.

Scarlett!

Skylar!

Wait. Is this your best friend or your twin sister?

All females on Caldera look exactly alike.

And it's glorious.

Hi. I'm Oliver. I'm sure Skylar's told you all about me.

Nope. Never heard of you.

All righty then.

Oh, don't worry. All you need to know about Oliver is right here in this song.

♪ We'll fly high into the Skylar... ♪

Give me that!

(Song continues faintly)

You know, I'm a superhero.

Should I really have to make my own lunch?

Probably not.

You also shouldn't have to take out the trash, but you're doing it.

Actually, that's Oliver's job. Oliver, trash bag.

On it!

I am the Garbage Man!

Yeah, that doesn't sound as impressive as you think.

Lunch is ready.

I'm starving.

What's wrong?

Oh, do I have something in my teeth?

Hey, Chase.

What ya doing?

Uh, nothing.

Just playing around with some machine parts.

You know me, Mr. Techie.

You can go now.

What do we have here?

Hey! Don't touch my lady hand.

What are you up to, you freaky little genius?

I'm not freaky.

I'm building a high-tech female android companion.

Bro, that's the definition of freaky.

Why are you doing this?

Science.

I'm lonely.

For years, I've wanted a cool, smart girl to hang out with.

For whatever reason, I can't seem to find one.

Maybe it's because you spend too much time working on stuff like this.

Hey, it'll be worth it.

Her artificial intelligence is all set.

I just have to assemble the parts, slide on her skin suit, and boom!

♪ Dream girl! ♪

Again... ♪ freaky ♪

There's nothing freaky about it.

Now, make yourself useful and pass me her nose.

Hi, Skylar. What are you doing?

Do you wanna go out and show Scarlett the city?

I'm sorry. We already made plans.

But you're welcome to join us.

Oh, great. What are we doing?

Sanding down Scarlett's back scales.

Yeah, I'm gonna pass.

Come on. It'll be fun.

I'll sand, you sweep.

Just like getting your nails done.

No. It's not.

I get the feeling Bree doesn't like me.

No. She's just not used to being around aliens.

And she may not like you.

Skylar, I have to ask.

Why are you even here?

You should be back on Caldera with the rest of us.

I like it here.

Yeah, but you said yourself, they don't get aliens.

Do you really wanna live on a planet where you're an outcast?

I'm not an outcast.

As much as I miss you and everybody else back on Caldera, I'm part of a team here.

They need me.

Okay. I get it.

Well, I'm gonna go lay down.

My stomach hurts. I think I ate too slow.

She doesn't wanna return home.

But don't worry. I know what to do.

Still working on your little robo chick?

Whoa.

Who's that?

Well, her real name is Cyborg 45172, but Christina seemed catchier.

This is your android?

Where are all the bolts and wires?

Hidden below the surface.

After all, I was designed by the smartest man in the world.

And the most handsome.

Oh, you.

Will you excuse us?

If you'd like some privacy, I can withdraw my head into my body cavity.

No, that's all right.

We'll just talk over there.

Although I would really love to see that sometime.

Dude, she's beautiful.

How could she possibly be into you?

Because I programmed her that way.

Look, I enter all her likes and dislikes into here, and it wirelessly transmits it to her virtual brain.

Oh, cool.

I gotta go get dressed.

For our first date, I'm taking her to the symphony.

But she hasn't done anything wrong.

Why are you punishing her?

Was that funny?

Am I supposed to laugh?

I'm... I'm confused.

She thinks your jokes are lame just like I do.

Isn't she great?

So, uh, what do you like to do for fun?

Whatever Chase likes to do.

Oh, you poor girl.

So I'm coming to you, Scarlett, her best friend, to make Skylar realize that I'm not gonna wait around forever.

I'm in high demand by girls all over this planet.

So if she doesn't scoop up old Ollie Boy right now...

(Clears throat)

Uh...

No, Scarlett, I will not date you.

Can you believe her, trying to steal your man?

Oliver.

Yes, my love?

Get out.

All right.

Well, I should probably get going.

What do you mean? You just got here.

I know, and I wish I could stay, but I have important business back on Caldera.

Skylar, just come with me.

It'll be like old times. You know you miss it.

I do, but I told you, I can't.

Well, is there anything I can do to change your mind?

No.

I'm sorry, but my decision is final.

Oh.

Well, then, I'm really sorry, too.

For what?

For this.

Mission accomplished.

I'm bringing her home.

Welcome home, Skylar.

What?

I'm on Caldera? Why'd you bring me here?

There's been a war between the old leadership, who believe we should use our powers to help others throughout the universe, and the opposition, who believe we should keep all Calderans here and only help ourselves.

So you brought me here to help you fight the opposition?

No. I am the opposition.

What?

We control the planet now.

And you think that you can just force me into joining your side?

You're a hero to our people.

If you're off wasting your powers on Earth, it makes the opposition look bad.

Your rightful place is here.

No, it's not.

I knew you'd resist, so I put you in a cell that disables your powers.

But you'll come around. We can be very convincing.

I will never join the opposition!

Like I said, we can be very convincing.

Both: Oh!

Kaz, what are you doing?

Having wings with Chrissy.

Ranch me.

No, no! She's not programmed to eat.

I know.

That's why we have the spit bucket.

Oh, yeah. From downtown.

Ow!

Did you reprogram Christina to like you instead of me?

Uh, let's see. Did you suddenly become a normal person who likes chicken wings and sports?

No.

Then yes. Yes, I did.

Listen, sorry.

I just... I thought it was amazing that you could design a perfect girl, so in a way, me stealing her from you is a compliment.

You know what? I don't have time for this.

Christina and I have to get to the symphony.

Helmut von Jurgen is conducting tonight.

Helmut von Jurgen!

Ugh. I don't wanna go to that.

I'd rather you just turned me off.

Oh, that's it. I'm reprogramming her back to the way she was.

No, you can't.

Run, Chrissy.

Wait.

Did you change your mind?

Nope. Mama needs her wings.

I love her.

Bree, I need your help.

Sure. You want me to lay down a little rap for your next song?

I got skills.

No.

Skylar left for good.

What?

There's a video message. Come on.

Hey, guys, I know this will be a surprise, but I've decided to return home with Scarlett and live on Caldera.

I'll miss you all, but you have to understand that this is what's best for me.

I wanted to say good-bye in person, but it was just too hard.

I'm sorry.

How could she just leave like that?

I know.

I always imagined if she went home, she'd wave to me from the deck of a cruise ship as she slowly pulled out of port.

Why would she be on a cruise ship if she's going to another planet?

'Cause she's Skylar, and she's perfect, and she likes boats.

But something's off.

It just doesn't seem like something she would do.

Yeah. You're right.

She wouldn't just abandon the team like that.

We should check the video again.

Hey, guys.

There. The timecode says 1:35, but I saw Skylar and Scarlett at 2:00, and she didn't say anything about leaving.

And all of her stuff is still up in her room.

You went in our room?

Oh, don't act so surprised.

You know I'm the mayor of Creepytown.

You know, call me crazy, but isn't it a weird coincidence that one of Skylar's friends from Caldera shows up, and then, all of a sudden, she just decides to leave without warning You think Scarlett took her?

I don't know.

But there's only one way to find out.

We could use my wormhole transporter.

If I set it to Caldera, we can be there in seconds.

I'll call Chase.

(Phone buzzing)

Great. He left his phone here. Call Kaz.

(Oliver singing)

Aw, he made my song his ringtone.

Now I know he's mocking me, but I'm flattered.

We don't have time to wait for them.

We should go. Here. Put this on.

What is it?

It's an atmospheric regulator patch.

They even out body temperatures in extreme climates.

Oh, but just a heads up. Side effects may include drowsiness, nausea, and sudden death.

Shall we do this?

Okay.

Great. We landed in the middle of nowhere.

Actually, the whole planet looks like this. We're downtown.

Okay, that is so strange.

Or is it so right?

Hey, Oliver.

Focus.

Sorry.

We do not talk to anyone till we know what's going on.

Don't worry. Calderans are very friendly.

Yeah, this place seems real inviting, especially those sacrificial lava pits.

Okay, let's just find Skylar, and get out of here.

Trust me.

I know exactly how to find her.

Skylar?

Skylar?

Skylar!

Chase, this is ridiculous.

Why are we fighting over Christina?

Because she's mine.

I like Kaz.

Quiet... Honey Bear.

No offense, Chase, but even if she could think for herself, like a human, I guarantee she would still pick me over you.

Oh? Oh, yeah?

Well, let's turn on her sentient setting and find out.

That way, she can form her own opinions without us having to program them.

Okay.

I like Kaz.

Heard you the first time!

There. That should do it.

All of her personality traits have been erased.

She's a clean slate.

So, Christina, who do you like best, me or the guy who didn't create you?

I chooooose...

What happened?

I don't know.

Christina.

I just have to get to her CPU.

It could be a short circuit, or a hardware malfunction or...

Buffalo sauce.

That's my girl.

Skylar?

Skylar?

Okay, this isn't working.

That was the 86th Skylar who isn't Skylar.

Although I did meet a Betty who seemed moderately interested.

You.

Skylar?

No.

Betty?

No.

It's Scarlett.

(Fearful shudder)

How did you get here?

That is none of your business.

With this wormhole transporter.

With that wormhole transporter.

Where's Skylar?

Locked up in a subterranean cell.

But don't worry.

You'll be joining her soon enough.

We're not going anywhere with you.

Oh, yes, you are.

Is that a proton ring?

That's not bionic; that's a superpower.

You have superpowers?

You have superpowers?!

Long story. We'll talk later.

Come on. Let's go find Skylar.

Hey, which way to the subterranean cells?

Thanks, Betty. You're one in a million.

Skylar. Bree, she's in here.

Whoa.

I'm so glad to see you guys.

Wait.

How do we know it's really her?

I know. Kiss me.

Never.

It is her.

How did you guys know I was here?

Scarlett left a good-bye message pretending to be you.

And she thought that would work?

She looks nothing like me.

Let's just get you out of here.

Get away from her.

We're not leaving without Skylar.

You humans think you can do whatever you want.

But you're on Caldera now.

If you're so tough, why don't you get out here and fight us face to face?

Because I don't have to.

(Loud rumbling)

What's that noise?

I have no idea.

No! Oliver!

Bree!

(Coughing)

What happened?

Scarlett used her power to trigger some kind of subterranean shock wave.

You're lucky to be alive.

Wait. So you and I are trapped together in a tiny jail cell?

I'm not alive; I'm in heaven!

Yeah, well, I'm here, too, so don't get weird.

Scarlett's gonna be back any minute.

We have to get out of here.

Use your powers to form a space portal and take us back to Earth.

Unless, you know, you just wanna stay here and make this our cozy little home.

Wow, that hurt! What was that?

I don't know. Maybe you should try it again.

The force running through those bars makes our powers useless.

Great. Scarlett destroyed the wormhole transporter, so we're stuck on Caldera.

It's your own fault for coming here.

There are a million other Calderans.

Why do you need Skylar?

Yeah, you don't want her. Take Bree.

Somebody's gotta take the hit.

Thanks for stepping up.

Scarlett's a part of the opposition, and they want me to help them take over the planet.

And once we do, Caldera will finally be powerful enough to rule the universe.

Totally hear ya.

Really respect your drive.

But where do we fit in on your little to-do list?

Oh, I'm not in control of your fates.

Skylar is.

What do you mean?

It's simple.

Join the opposition, and I'll release them.

And if I don't?

Then you'll watch as I destroy them.

Slowly and painfully.

The choice is yours, Skylar.

Let's see how much you really care about your human friends.

I can't believe we're gonna be killed by your alien bestie.

No offense, but sometimes I wish you were just a simple girl from the Midwest.

Come on!

What are you doing?

Every time Scarlett pops up on here, it gets worse and worse for us, so I'm trying to unplug the stupid thing.

That's a good idea. Or at least change the channel.

Ooh, maybe there's a show about remodeling caves.

I'm thinking a love nest for two.

And a guest room for the bionic plus one.

Decision time, Skylar.

What's it gonna be?

Give it up.

She's not joining the opposition.

Actually...

I am.

What?

It's a small price to pay for saving your lives.

But, Skylar...

I made up my mind, Oliver.

This is what I have to do.

I'm ready to join you.

Good choice.

But before I let you out, I need to know you're serious.

I gave you my word. Isn't that enough?

No. In order to prove your allegiance to the opposition, I'll need to permanently remove your powers to create space portals.

What? But then I'd never be able to go back to Earth.

You can't do that.

Yeah, take her time-traveling power instead.

I don't have a time-traveling power.

She doesn't know that.

Are you with us or not?

Do whatever you have to do.

We'll never see you again.

I know.

Go ahead.

Welcome to the opposition.

Okay, Christina's finally all fixed.

Now she can think for herself, and choose who she likes better... me, a handsome, brilliant man who, oh, by the way, built an android in a day, or you, a monkey in jeans.

I'm not hearing the insult.

So, who's it gonna be?

I like Kaz.

What?!

Dude, not only can you not get real girls, you can't even get the ones you build.

Oh, yes, I can.

And to prove it, I'll just build another.

Okay, Kaz, you think you're so smooth, let's see who the new girl picks.

(Laughs)

You just lost to a monkey.

I'll just build another.

Okay, I feel good about this one.

Third time's the...

Welcome to the Kaz party.

Okay, this time...

Just go ahead.

What is taking so long?

Skylar agreed to join the opposition, so why hasn't Scarlett released us yet?

Maybe she's making us dinner.

It would be rude to send us home without a meal.

Or maybe she's never gonna let us out of here.

We've got to contact Kaz and Chase somehow.

Oh, I have my phone.

We're on another planet. Phones aren't gonna work here.

Are you sure?

My carrier says their coverage is out of this world, so I'm taking them at their word.

Look, it's asking if I want to join the Calderan Wi-Fi network.

Wait, yes, Skylar said that her planet has email.

But you need a password to use it.

We'll never be able to figure that out.

I'm in!

I may have been looking over Skylar's shoulder once or twice when she was emailing Caldera.

You know what?

I can't believe I'm saying this, but thank you for being so creepy.

Tell me again just how great I am.

You're the best.

I can't hear you.

Girls: You're the best!

This is ridiculous.

Chrissy, would you mind grabbing me my laptop?

Girls: Me, me, me!

Chrissy: Back off!

Okay, okay.

I love that they're into me, but do they have to be so aggressive?

Yes. I programmed them to be overly territorial and loyal.

Why?

So they'd never leave me.

Were you not listening? I'm lonely.

Ooh, I got an email from Caldera.

Maybe it's that Calderan prince giving his money away.

There is no Calderan prince!

Someone's a little testy.

Yeah, sorry.

It isn't every day that you get rejected seven times.

Eight. Chrissy rejected you twice.

That's weird.

This email's from Oliver and Bree.

All: Who's Bree?

This librarian friend. Very frumpy.

Look. Oliver and Bree are trapped in a Calderan prison cell.

It was Scarlett.

All: Who's Scarlett?

Why are you asking so many questions?

Give me that.

How did they even get to another planet?

Oliver must've used his wormhole transporter.

I still have mine; it's downstairs in Mission Command.

Well, go get it.

Oh!

I'm going with him.

All: Me, too.

Ladies, ladies, why fight over Kaz when you can stay here with me?

Where's Skylar?

It's me.

Don't even try it, Scarlett.

Skylar's beautiful. You look like a tired old she-beast.

Wait.

So that's Scarlett?

Mm-hmm.

Which means you're...

She-beast.

What I said... I didn't mean...

Okay, I deserved that one.

Let them go, Scarlett.

I joined your side, you have what you want.

Now it's time to honor your end of the agreement.

Yeah, and if you don't let us out of here right now...

Thank you.

Skylar, you didn't have to do this.

We could've found another way.

It's okay. Just say good-bye to Chase and Kaz for me.

Tell them I'm sorry for letting down the team.

Skylar, I... I can't just leave you here.

You mean everything to me.

There's no other way.

I'm sorry.

Oh, and Oliver.

For what it's worth, I like you, too.

Really?

Let's go. Wrap it up.

Stick a sock in it, space hag.

I waited a lifetime for this.

Good-bye, Oliver.

We'll never forget you.

Good. Now that that's over with, we can finally get you useless humans off our planet.

Come on.

No. She's coming with us.

Oliver, no!

We have to get outta here.

I don't think so.

How could you attack me, Skylar?

You're a disgrace.

You just proved that you'll always choose humans over your own, and for that, you'll all be destroyed in the Calderan lava pits.

You picked a great time to visit.

The lava pits are in full bubble this time of year.

Take a moment to enjoy the view before I dump you in for a closer look.

Bree: Whoa, okay!

You know what? There is something I have to get off my chest.

The way you eat is not normal.

Yeah, that's a great idea.

Taunt the unstable girl who is dangling us over a lava pit.

Where are Kaz and Chase?

They should've gotten our email by now.

Maybe I could use my super strength to bend the bars.

Don't bother.

The cage is like the cell; our powers are useless in here.

Can't you use your bionics?

I have super speed, vocal manipulation, turbo leap and invisibility.

Do you really think any of those are gonna get us outta here?

Probably not, but I bet that bionic attitude will do the trick.

Why did you bring them with us?

It's not my fault. They follow me everywhere.

I never thought I would say this, but I'm finally seeing the downside to having seven girlfriends.

All: I'm your girlfriend.

Hey, hey, technically, you're all my girlfriends.

You just like him more.

All: Much more, much more.

Yeah, I get it.

This place is huge.

I'll have to locate Bree through her bionic GPS.

This isn't gonna work.

Um, ladies, you know what's always great on the hottest, driest planet in the universe?

A nice, tall glass of water.

I'm asking for water.

All: Water!

Good call.

Caldera only consists of .002 percent water.

They got a better chance of solving the quantum physics general relativity conundrum. Ha!

In the right company, that's a joke.

And you wonder why they like me more.

I've kept you in here long enough.

It's time.

To catch the 5:00 wormhole back to Earth?

Scarlett, please don't do this.

We've been friends all our lives.

Shouldn't that count for something?

You tell me.

Shouldn't our friendship make you more loyal to me than these outsiders?

By attacking me, you not only betrayed one of your own, you betrayed all Calderans, and that can never be forgiven.

Are you sure?

A nice fruit basket goes a long way.

Good-bye, Skylar.

Kaz: Wait!

Ooh. A death cage over a lava pit.

Nice. I wanna save them, but I sorta wanna see how this plays out.

You take Scarlett. I'll free them.

Don't worry, guys. I'll get you out of there.

Yes!

Stand back.

This one's all mine.

What the heck was that?!

Thermonuclear body blast.

Oh, did I not tell you I have superpowers now?

No.

Did you know about this?

I wanna say yes, just to make you mad, but I had no idea.

Guys, we have to get outta here. Where's your transporter?

Oh, I put it down over there.

I don't like to fight with stuff in my pockets.

Go get it!

I got it.

No. I got it.

Hey. No one messes with our Kaz.

Get her, girls.

Wait. What?

Scarlett: What are you doing?

Long story. All you need to know is they are robots, and they love me.

No. Please. Skylar. Help me.

Oh, okay. Now you want my help?

Five minutes ago, you were gonna kill me.

The opposition forced me to. I had no choice.

Please help me.

Put her down.

Oh, yeah, it's gotta be me. Put her down.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

Now hand over the transporter.

No.

What?

You're pathetic.

I knew you didn't have the guts to hurt me.

You've become just as weak as the humans you surround yourself with.

Scarlett, give us the transporter.

No. You're on my planet now, and I control what happens...

Watch out!

I offered her a fruit basket.

She could be eating peaches right now.

Oh, yeah. Biggest group wormhole ever.

It's good to be back.

Yeah, just in time.

Promised I'd video chat with my mom.

All: Who's Mom, who's Mom, who's Mom, who's Mom?

Who's Mom, who's Mom?

This is gonna be hard to explain.

So you guys created seven android girlfriends?

That's pathetic.

What if I asked you to create a bunch of hot robot dudes to worship me?

Wait, can you do that?

Trust me, it's not worth it.

They'll just like Kaz.

Hey, you all right?

I just can't stop thinking about Caldera.

I'm really sorry about Scarlett.

Yeah. I just wish I got to her before the opposition did.

Now that they've torn Caldera apart, it's never gonna be the same.

My home is gone.

No.

This is your home.

Yeah. You belong here.

With us.

With me.

With us.

Are you sure?

I mean, like you said, I'm a crazy alien girl who has 14 toes and does really weird things.

And we wouldn't have it any other way.

Besides, I'm gonna need your help with my new superpowers.

Yeah, about that.

Why didn't you tell me?

I didn't want you to feel bad.

You have, like, one ability.

(Mimicking Chase's bionic power)

Okay, okay, okay!

How did you even get them?

Skylar knew that I wanted more powers, so she acted as a buffer between me and the Arcturian rock.

You touched it?

That's really dangerous. You could've been killed.

I know, but sometimes, you have to take a risk to help the ones you care about.

Kinda like I did for you.

Wow, he picked up on that quicker than I thought.

You really stuck up for me today, Oliver.

It meant a lot. Thank you.

No problem.

So does this mean we're, like, dating?

Well, let's start with this, and see where it goes.

Oh, okay.

Uh, can you guys excuse me for a second?

You were saying?

Chase, I am done.

You can have all of my AI girlfriends.

I can't get away from them.

I would rather be sad and lonely, like you.

I don't want 'em.

After seeing how much they annoy you, I've decided to go back to finding a real girlfriend.

I'll dismantle them all tonight.

Actually, before you do, I have an idea.

(Whistling)

Excuse me, ladies.

Need to get out on the terrace to meet Skylar.

I don't know if you've heard, but we're almost an item now.

All: We like Oliver.

All: Oliver!

(Screaming)

(Laughter)

Ranch me.