The Uploads


 * Don't do it!


 * I just need one, man. Just one video. Just let me hit one.


 * No! You'll end up disappearing down the Elmore Stream hole. There's no knowing how many precious hours you'll lose watching idiotic online videos. So back away from the PC.


 * DON'T COME ANY CLOSER! I'LL DO IT! I'LL CLICK!


 * Don't! Just stay calm, take your hands away from the keyboard.


 * Now slowly walk away from the computer.


 * Now turn around. Nice and easy.


 * Don't! You got too much to live for! You got family, right?


 * (Nodding) Uh-huh.


 * You got friends, yeah?


 * (Nodding) Uh-huh.


 * You got a girlfriend, too.


 * Then why waste your life online like this?!


 * (Crying) I've gone too far. It's too late for me. It's too late.


 * It's never too late to choose life...instead of the internet. Just drop the mouse.


 * You got too much to live for! Drop the mouse! DROP THE MOUSE! DROP IT! DROP IT NOW! DROP IT!


 * (Crying) OKAY, OKAY!


 * [In Slow-Motion] NOOOOOO!


 * Well, I guess one's okay.


 * "William Exam Fail."

"William's Exam Fail"

 * (Whispering) Ha! Check this out.


 * You can turn over your test paper now.


 * Oh, sorry, William. Here.


 * Okay, just one more.

"Makeup Tips"

 * DAH, hello! Today I'll show you how to get rid of those pesky blemishes. DAH! First, you need a little foundation.


 * AAAAAH! Good. Now detract from the blemishes, accent your eyes.


 * AAAAAH! Now, as a distraction from your big eyebrows, big eyes!


 * Finishing touch -- Lipstick!


 * So, there it is, guys. Makeup can fix everything. But remember that real beauty lies within. AAAAAH!

"Alan's Ice Bucket"

 * I was nominated by my friend Gumball for the Ice Bucket Challenge. To be on --


 * COMMUNICATION ERROR: You are not friends with Gumball.


 * (Nervous Chuckle) To be honest, I think it's better to just give to the cause without doing the challenge, but --


 * LOGIC ERROR: Why are you doing it, then?


 * What's the harm in having a little fun while helping others? Anyway, the knowledge that I'm doing my bit for those less fortunate than me will keep me warm.


 * NEGATIVE -- Altruistic aid of others will provide zero insulation.


 * Okay, you know, Bobert, sometimes you can be a little too literal, you know? Just pour the ice bucket, please?


 * I nominate Tobias, Darwin, and --


 * Oh, hey! What about "Game Review!"?

"Infiniternity"

 * Every journey is a circle turning in squares.


 * But you can't square the circle.


 * You can only run.


 * Run back to you, back to me, back to us.


 * Outside of everything. Inside of Nothing.


 * Infiniternity by --


 * All right, all right! You can skip now! Man!

Calculator Game Review

 * Okay, hi. This week, I'm reviewing this game I found was part of my computer. It's not as good as Minesweeper or Solitaire, but it's worth a shot.


 * Okay, so, I'm just loading up the game now.


 * Okay, it's called "Cal-cu-la-tor." Um, you take a character (a 1) and you pick up a pair of binoculars (an 8) and you spot the treasure marked by the "X," (a multiplication symbol) obviously. (Chuckles) But be careful because as soon as you get the treasure, there's this snake thing. (a 5) But it's okay 'cause you can pick up the ax (a 9) or the bow (a right parentheses) or the arrow (a forward slash) and kill it and see what you got.

Hey, I got a new high score! One criticism I have is that there's no female characters, but there's no male characters, either, so it's okay, I guess. Um, there's a couple of little glitches with certain commands, like if I try to use the arrow (forward slash) with the balloon (a 0), see what happens?


 * So, yeah, pretty good game. 8/10. Would play again.


 * Ah, ah, "Gorilla vs Killer Whale!"


 * [Groaning] Trolled.

"TobiasX-TremePrank"

 * Hey, this is Tobias Wilson, and this prank is called "The Rise and Shine."


 * Yeah! Okay, it's 5 A.M., and my dad is about to get up for work. But I put a skateboard at the bottom of the stairs. Shh! Let's see what happens.


 * What the...?


 * Aah! Honey! We're being robbed!


 * Hello, police! We have an intruder! Yes! He's probably armed and dangerous, and he's wearing a rap-music hat.


 * Guys, guys, it's me! This is a prank. You just got Tobias'd.


 * Of course! Well, that makes this terrible ordeal funny all of a sudden.


 * I thought my family was in mortal danger, but it wasn't.


 * You're grounded.


 * (Sigh) This is extreme pranking with Tobias Wil-- AAH!


 * What? "'The Amazing World of Gumball' - Movie Trailer?"


 * Click it.

"A Little Moment of Calm"

 * Welcome to "A Little Moment of Calm," with me -- Mr. Small. Oh I really should have called this "Small Moment of Calm." Anyway, un-clench your chakras, and I'll demonstrate using my new CD, now available in gas stations and supermarkets.


 * [Through CD] Open your chest and relax. Breathe in. Breathe out.


 * [Through CD] Breathe in. Breathe out.


 * [Through CD] B-b-breathe out.


 * [Through CD] E-e-enjoy your new body. After all, yoga is a form of rebirth. Namaste.


 * I'll need to bleach my eyeballs after that.


 * I think we need some cuteness now.


 * Oh, come on!


 * (Gasps) Ooh! "Epic Fail!"

"Epic Fail"

 * Ha ha, did you see that?


 * That's the first one of those I've seen that's actually epic.


 * (Sighs) What's Joe done now?

"Banana Banana"

 * [Autotuned & Singing]: I say BA-NAH-NA


 * [High Pitched & Singing]: And I say BA-NA-NA


 * [Singing] BA-NAH-NA


 * [Singing] BA-NA-NA


 * [Singing] BA-NAH-NA


 * [Singing] [Scat Singing] I say BA-NAH-NA


 * [Singing] And I say BA-NA-NA


 * [Singing] BA-NAH-NA


 * [Singing] BA-NA-NA


 * [Singing] BA-NAH-NA


 * [Singing] BA-NA-NA


 * [Singing] BA-NAH-NA


 * [Singing] BA-NA-NA


 * [Singing] [Scat Singing] Yeah


 * Dude, we're getting too deep.


 * Then stop clicking.


 * I can't.


 * He's not doing anything.


 * Nah, just wait for it. He's got to do something.


 * Dude, this is creepy.


 * Shh! Just wait for it.


 * Oh. I guess it was noth--}}


 * Stop banging your face on the keyboard! You might click another--!


 * (Sighs) Too late.

The Elmore Stream Hole

 * Ohh! We're getting sucked into the bottomless pit of Elmore Stream. You need to stop.


 * I can't. I can't. I have to watch it. I have to watch it all.


 * Woody, fetch.


 * "Ten Hours of Saxophone Chi-hoo-hah?"


 * [Deeper Voice] Oh, thank goodness for that. It's not loading. I think we're done.


 * See? We weren't here that long.