The Once and Future Thing, Part 2: Time, Warped

Previously on Justice League Unlimited You invent a time machine and can't do anything useful with it?! I can use it to get away from you. David Clinton, inventor of the chrono suit, at your disposal. You tried to steal Batman's utility belt. Don't hurt anyone. We could accidentally change history. We've been expecting you. Static, what's going on? Dad? We need to get out of here. Leaving so soon? You didn't even take any party favors. Incoming! That's not gonna hold. Where do you think you're going, sugar? Look, Dee Dee, another Green Lantern. He's much cuter than the last one we killed, don't you think, Dee Dee? How'd you? Ow. Hold still so I can pound you. Yeah, that's what I'll do. Hey! What's the big idea? You shouldn't ought to have done that. We're getting out of here now. Not a chance. Hold the line. He's right. We're the Justice League. We don't run from a fight. I don't remember putting this up for a vote. Keep your head in the game. There's always a way. Virgil! I need some cover. They're gone, Dee Dee. Bet I know which way they went, Dee Dee. After 'em! I think we've lost them. Where are we headed? The Watchtower? Not exactly. This is Justice League headquarters? For now. We're all that's left of the League. You've traveled about 50 years into your future. Last time I saw you, you were too young to drive. You look good for a man your age. The miracles of modern medicine. And the Watchtower? It's gone. We lost a lot of good people that day. You mean, Superman, J'onn, all the others? Yeah. You too. And the Bat cave? This is all we have left now. Deal with it. Surprised to see me? A little. I'm more surprised that I lived so long. Batman, Bruce Wayne. Bruce Wayne, Batman. Or have you met? Not now. Not now. Great. What did they used to call it? Stereo? This is a little weird for everybody. I'm War Hawk. Rex Stewart. Your mother. Who is she? Kind of obvious, don't you think? Even if it isn't, leave it be. You don't wanna know too much about your future. Trust me, you really don't. Shayera was one cranky pregnant lady. Although, to be fair, if I'd laid an egg that size He's kidding, Dad. Not that I understand why you think this is anything to joke about. Because we already won. Think about it. If old Bruce is here, that means he already lived through this as Batman. Flawless logic. Except that I have no memory of ever going to the future and meeting my older self, or of anything else that's happening today. Those historical buildings we saw on the street. The time line's been polluted. So polluted that history itself is becoming fluid. We'd better compare notes. Enid, I have to say that I'm vexed. Yes, vexed is precisely the word for it. You shouldn't let yourself get upset, David. You're right, dear. But here we are. Now, look at it from my point of view. I go to the trouble of taking over the whole city so I have a nice place to keep my collection. And it's a beautiful collection, David. I was gonna say the same thing, boss. For instance, this is a really nice boat. Big. Don't patronize me, Chucko, and especially, don't interrupt me. I'm sorry. Sorry what? Everybody? Sorry, Lord Chronos. It doesn't seem right. I go to the future. I get the technology that gives you all your new super-powers. I let you run amuck in my town in return for the occasional security job. And what do you do in return? Um Um Rhetorical. My point is, I give you an easy job: take care of Batman, Wonder Woman and Green Lantern. It should have been But the JLU showed up. They got in our way. Yes, they did. And the question arises: Who told them where and when our targets would arrive? I mean, I told you. And I only know, because I'm the undisputed master of space and time. I'll look into it, boss. I'll find out where the leak was. No, don't trouble yourself, Chucko. No, don't bother. I already know. Somebody's getting a payoff. Yes, he is. Chucko, Chucko, Chucko. You've been a very bad clown. Enjoy your stay. You think I'm scared? I'll be running this dump in a few y-- Oh, phooey. Do you know what killed the dinosaurs? Uh, no, sir. Well, Chucko does. And unless you wanna find out firsthand, you'll go finish off the Justice League. Skedaddle. Time is money. Actually, time is the nonspatial continuum in which events occur linearly, usually in the direction of increased entropy. But the clowns seem to relate better to the money thing. Oh, Enid, look at what I've done. And you always said I wouldn't amount to anything. I guess I showed you. Now I've taken over Gotham, which gives me plenty of space to store my antiques. Did you notice I took that stuff out of the garage? You can park there now if you want to. Thank you, David. Heh. David, uh, didn't you tell me it was dangerous to take important things from the past? That it could damage time somehow? Don't you think I can handle it? O-of course I do. Dear? Hmm? Do you know what would make me happy? If you let my mother out of the thing, like you promised. We'll see. Rub my neck. It's just that it seems cruel to keep her there so long. Your mother was the one who always said I'd never amount to anything. And you agreed with her. Whatever I do, whatever I accomplish, it'll never be enough for you, will it? I just wanted you to love me! I'm sick of this! I'm sick of you! Wait, baby, please. Isn't there anything I can do to make things right? I sincerely doubt it. We still don't know much about him. Obviously, he's a time-traveling warlord. He's littered the streets with buildings he's stolen from other time periods. He's not a warlord. At least, he wasn't at first. When we chased him to the Old West, all he was stealing was historical trinkets. He's causing severe damage to the space/time continuum. The degradation is increasing exponentially. I've got something. When we were in the Old West, I got a good look at his time belt. I've written a program that should disable it. If we can get close enough to upload it. If we can get our hands on the belt, maybe we can stop this from happening in the first place. We could even undo the death of your friends Diana! Shenever left the island. Or she was never born. Time is running out. Literally. We need to find Chronos. How? He could be anywhere. Sometimes the old ways are best. It's not gonna work. You don't know your way around. A lot of things have changed. Are criminals still superstitious and cowardly? Yep. Good enough for me. You're supposed to be the real Batman, right? I mean, the first one. I've seen history cubes about you. Hard to believe somebody stupid as you ever beat the Joker. Maybe I'm smarter than I look. Oh, terrific. You've got some information we need, Ghoul. You won't find me the talkative sort. Hey! Where's Chronos? My arm's getting tired. I can't believe I was ever that green. This is how you interrogate someone. And we've got organized into about I don't know where Chronos is. He contacts us. Spends every night in a different one of those old buildings. There's no way of knowing ahead of time where he's gonna be. And that's everything I know. Everything? I wet my bed until I was 14. Losing my patience. I can't control my friend here much longer. You better give us something we can use. His wife. I know where his wife is. Wow. Batman playing good cop. Everything's relative. Get me another box of bonbons. Will you hold it down out there?! You guys are always fighting! Enid Clinton. We've got business with your husband. What? John? Hal Jordan. Another time shift. I'm up to speed. Carry on. Okay. I'm starting to get a migraine. We'd better get used to it. This is going to get worse before it gets better. Any one of us could change or even cease to exist. That's why you have to tell us where to find David. We just wanna undo the harm he's caused. You have my word. We'll do everything to keep from hurting him. Between you and me, I wouldn't mind one bit if he got roughed up along the way. Then where is he tonight? The Parthenon? The Great Sphinx? He just wants people to think he moves around. He always sleeps in the same place. No booby traps. At least none that my ring can detect. Make up your mind, would you? Anyway, it's safe to go in. If we don't beat this guy, it's the end of everything. We've been there before. Not like this. What are you supposed to do when you have the weight of the world on your shoulders? Plant your feet. I don't understand. With all of the places he could be, why sleep here? Because a loser with a kingdom is still just a loser. See for yourself. Huh-- Uh-- Enid? Nice on the stealth thing, lady. Get the belt. Nothing else matters. A real gentleman, isn't he, Dee Dee? They're practically extinct, Dee Dee. It happened again. Look out! Monsters! Fire at will! Batman's not paying us any attention, Dee Dee. He should be punished, Dee Dee. Terry! Terry. How could you betray me, Enid? Everything I've done, I've done for you. Don't blame this on me. I just wanted you to assert yourself, not destroy the universe. Get away from my kid! Chronos! You are good. Isn't he good? Look at what's happening around you. Look at the sky. Pretty. Stay with us, man. We've got a problem here. Right. You're right. This calls for another approach. You'll love me next time. Where's he going? There's nothing left. Yes, there is. The beginning of time. He can reset everything. Make himself into a god. Only if he gets there first. The Green Lanterns have a legend: No one can see the beginning of time. It's a universal law. Write him a ticket. No! Uploading the program. Make it fast. Having a little trouble with the brakes. That all really happened? Think so. Then we won. Everything's back to normal? That's a nasty cut, John. You don't remember going on a mission with us today, do you? I just got here. The time line's restored to equilibrium. We're the only two people who remember what happened. That complicates things. What happened to Chronos? I reprogrammed the belt to make sure that Chronos would never come to exist. You worthless, good for nothing, wretched waste of space. You invent a time machine and can't think of anything useful to do with it? I can think of one thing. Worthless, good-for-nothing, wretched waste of space. You invent a time machine and can't think of anything useful to do with it?! I can think of one thing. Worthless, good-for-nothing, wretched waste of space