Air Feather Friends

(Setting: The Marketplace. Fazal stands in front of Omar's fruit stand.)

Fazal: At these prices, your fruit should be covered with jewels. Omar: Ah-ha, but then, they wouldn't be as delicious! (Abu reaches up and steals a banana from the stand; the men don't see him.) Omar: I defy you to find a better deal than— (Abu steals figs out of Omar's hand) Hey!

(Omar moves a blue pot, revealing Abu. Omar takes the banana; the peel opens to reveal that the banana itself is missing.) Omar: Huh? (Abu smiles; the banana is in his mouth) Fazal: You thieving little monster!

(Fazal raises his sword; Abu dodges the attack by jumping onto Fazal's turban. Omar throws a tomato, which hits Fazal in the face. Abu runs, but is stopped when he crashes into Aladdin's leg.)

Aladdin: In trouble again, Abu? (Abu smiles) 

Iago: He's got banana on his breath. Omar: (from a distance) There he is! Aladdin: Always saving your tail... Iago: You coulda swiped some for the rest of us.

(Omar and Fazal reach them)

Aladdin: Good morning, Omar! Oh, cut yourself shaving, Fazal? Fazal: (Wipes tomato off of his face) That master of a thousand fleas has stolen my fruit! Aladdin: He was just shopping for me. (He puts his hand behind his back, revealing three coins. Abu takes them, tosses them to Omar, smugly, and blows a raspberry in that general direction.)If Abu were hungry, he'd climb a tree and eat dates for free!

Fazal: (Puts his hand to his chin, thinking.) Mmm, free dates!

(A strong wind blows through) Iago: Well, what kinda wind— (he's blown off Aladdin's shoulder) Rasoul: Get those gates closed!

(Guards Hakim and Nahbi close and lock the city gates. There's a large gust of wind and the gates break, throwing the guards; three whirlwinds enter the city.)

Fazal: Wind demons, run! (The whirlwinds start to the damage the city. A man is nearly smashed by watermelons and another, who laid on a bed of nails, is forced off the bed and nearly crushed by it.)

Iago: (chased by a whirlwind) Get outta here, shoo, go on, git! (He screams—there's another whirlwind in front of him. He's caught between them, then thrown across the city.)

(Aladdin, clinging to a pole, watches a whirlwind approach a vendor's stand; it takes a pile of gold off of the stand then turns and goes in the other direction.) Aladdin: Huh?

(A rich man, in fine clothes and jewelry, stands in the middle of the Marketplace.) (The whirlwind attacks him; his clothes get ripped) Man: My gold! (The whirlwind attacks again; it steals his jewelry) Man: My jewels!

(The whirlwind attacks one more time; it steals his clothes, leaving him in his white, heart-print boxers) Man: My goodness!

(Rasoul, Hakim, Fazal, and Nahbi stand before the city gates, swords drawn.) Rasoul: Stand firm, men!

(The whirlwinds run over the guards and exit the city. Aladdin steps over the fallen guards.)

Aladdin: Don't just sit there, they're getting away! Fazal: Good. Let the wind demons leave! Aladdin: They weren't demons, they were thieves! They stole everything! (Rasoul stands. His turban is unraveled and wrapped around his body.)

Rasoul: (Struggling to free himself) Oh? And how do you explain thieves that hide in the wind? Aladdin: (taunting) I don't know, but I bet a sand gnat could figure it out, with a little bit of effort. (Rasoul walks over. He flexes and the cloth wrap flies off of him.) Rasoul: Well, then it is a bet— (he grabs Aladdin's vest, pulling him face-to-face) — sand gnat. Now, what shall be the stakes?Fazal: (Looks at Abu) I want his pet! (Rasoul smiles; Aladdin frees himself from his grasp) Fazal: (Laughs) The little beast will bring me none but the juiciest of dates for free. (Abu, irritated, does a karate stance. Aladdin grabs him.)

(A crowd has formed)

Aladdin: Abu isn't my pet. He's my friend. Abu: Uh huh! Rasoul: (Laughs) So, Aladdin won't back up his boast? (The crowd chatters. Aladdin looks around, embarrassed) Aladdin: What? I... didn't say that... Rasoul: Or maybe he is no smarter than a sand gnat after all.(Rasoul, Fazal, and the crowd laugh) Aladdin: Fine! It's a bet! I'll prove to you that they aren't wind demons! Abu: Yeah! (Realizes what Aladdin just did) ... huh? Aladdin: And when I do, Fazal will be fetching dates for Abu! Abu: (Shakes his head and gestures "no") No, no, no, no, no! Uh-uh! (Leaps off of Aladdin's shoulder)

Rasoul: Well, I will want to see this proof when you return... or your friend is ours.

(Setting: the desert. Aladdin, Iago, and Abu are on Carpet. Abu sits with his back turned to Aladdin.)

Aladdin: Now, keep your eyes peeled, guys. The sooner we catch those so-called demons, the sooner we win a bet. (He runs his hand through Abu's hair.) Abu: Oh, boy. (Huffs) (Genie comes out of his lamp) Genie: Hold it! Stop everything! (Carpet stops) Did you risk Abu on a bet? (Turns into a monkey version of the "Godfather" with one arm behind his back) You must show respect to the simian family. Be good to Abulio (picks up a confused Abu; he is wearing a pinstriped suit) or you could wake up sleeping with fishes. (Take his arm from behind him and reveals a snoring fish in a night cap; air bubbles come out of its mouth) Aladdin: (Waves dismissively) Hey, proving the whirlwinds are thieves will be a cinch! Abu's not going anywhere. (Genie reverts to normal) Genie: Oh, forget what I said then. Iago: (Nudges Abu) I hope you like picking dates for a living. (Abu blows a raspberry at him) Aladdin: Can you tell us which way they went, Genie? Genie: (as a weathervane) I got a fix on'em, due north! Buckle up and let's jet!

(Genie turns into a jet engine and pushes Carpet forward. They fly quickly, passing the three whirlwinds.) Aladdin: There they are! Stop! (Carpet stops abruptly; Genie keeps going, crashing into the ground head first. Carpet lands.) Genie: Smooth flight... but the re-entry could use work. (The whirlwinds approach)

Aladdin: We can trip them up with some rope. Genie: (as a hardware store employee) Ah, right away. Now will that be hemp, nylon, or cotton blend? Aladdin: Uh, hemp. Genie: Twist, weave, or Indian spiral? (Iago and Abu gasp— the whirlwinds are close)

Aladdin: Twist. Genie: Now what about size? (With six arms he holds up different kinds of rope) I got a special today on some nice tes— Aladdin: (Panicked) Genie! Genie: (He drops all the rope, which wraps around him) I guess we can skip the layaway option!(Aladdin grabs one end of the rope wrapped around Genie and forms a barricade. The whirlwinds crash into the rope, pulling it away from Aladdin.) Aladdin: Whoa!

(Genie is spun around and gets stuck in the ground. The whirlwinds keep going.) Aladdin: (To the whirlwinds in the distance) Go ahead and run, you cowards!

(The whirlwinds stop; an arm holding a sword comes out of each. The whirlwinds leap into the air, spin like propellers, and come back toward the gang.)

Iago: Nice going, Mr. Deathwish. Genie: (Buried in the ground, dizzy, with stars around his head.) Is that you, Auntie Em? (Carpet tries to free him) I had the strangest dream about a four-speed blender!

(The propellers attack. Aladdin ducks; one of them chases after Iago. It runs into him and shaves all of the feathers off of his lower body. Iago screams and crashes into the ground, head first.)

(Carpet props Genie up) Genie: Uh oh! Looks like lunchtime rush at a sushi bar! (His tail turns into a bicycle pump) Time to get these gales a taste of their own medicine!

(Carpet pumps, inflating Genie until he's huge. Genie blows a huge gust of wind that sends the attackers away, screaming.) Aladdin: (Extends his hand) All right! Abu: (Hi-fives him) Yeah! (He realizes that he's still mad at Aladdin and turns away, his arms crossed.) Genie: (Back to normal size) Whew! (His tongue unravels on the ground) Breathless-ah!

(Three thieves, loaded with treasure, fall out of the propellers.)

Aladdin: Those are Abis Mal's thugs!

Genie: (To Abu) Abis Mal. Scourge of the desert, not a nice guy. Aladdin: (To the thieves) Hey! Hold it right there!

(One thief leaps into the air and tries to grab a golden feather. Another one grabs him, then the men form whirlwinds and escape.) Iago: (Nearby, checking out the damage to his lower body) Oh, perfect. Could we leave the bird a little dignity? (The feather falls beside him; his eyes bulge) Say! Aladdin: (To Abu) Wind demons my camel! I told you they were thieves! (Abu grumbles) Aladdin: ... what's with him? Genie: (As Rasoul) I want to see this proof when you return. Aladdin: Oh, right. Proof.

(Iago uses the feather to replace his missing tail feather, then walks over to the group.) Aladdin: Funny, Iago. I never noticed you wearing gold before. Iago: Must be that new cream rinse I'm using. Now back off! (Abu steals the feather) You greedy... (mocking) I hope Al loses the bet. Aladdin: Wow...

(Abu waves the feather; a whirlwind forms around him. Surprised, Abu falls out of the air and onto Iago.) Iago: I hope ya pick dates better than ya fly. Aladdin: So, this is how those thugs spin like whirlwinds! (Genie turns into a game show contestant) Genie: (Hits a button) What is a Roc's feather? (As a game show host) "What is a Roc's feather" is correct! Aladdin: Rocks have feathers? Iago: Oooh, he must have had some bad fish. Stand back, he could get violent! Genie: Not like rocks in your head! Roc, like the legendary giant bird! (As the sun) And I mean giant! They got wings big enough to blot out the sun! (The screen goes black; the character's eyes light up, as in classic cartoons. The light reverts to normal and Genie continues) Genie: (Comes out of an egg, wearing a bonnet) Baby birds are protected by those wind feathers until they can fly. Aladdin: That feather's proof of Abis Mal's scheme! (Abu hops on Carpet and gestures for the others to join him) Aladdin: What's the rush? Imagine the look on Rasoul's face when we return with proof and the stolen loot. (Takes the feather from Abu) Iago: And imagine the look on my face when Abis Mal fries my gizzard! (Abu steals the feather back, taunting Aladdin) Aladdin: Relax, guys. (He takes the feather back, then waves it around to form a whirlwind.)We've got this. It'll be a breeze. Abu: Uh uh! (Abu grabs one end of the feather; Aladdin holds on to the other. The two tug at it and it splits in half.) Aladdin: ... sorry. (Abu looks at his half, shocked, then faints) Genie: (To Aladdin) Hello, Abis Mal.

(Setting: Abis Mal's lair. The three thieves from before are begging)

Thief 1:  I'm sorry, Abis Mal, oh great one! We were attacked by Aladdin and his genie. Abis Mal: But you had feathers! What is it with Aladdin? Do I foil his plans? Whatever, fine. No torture today. But tomorrow, I lop off your heads. (Abis Mal walks away, contemplating. Haroud emerges from behind a pillar and joins him) Haroud: Oh, if you keep disposing of your men, Sir, you won't have any left. Abis Mal: Do I tell you how to do your job? Haroud: Yes, you do. Abis Mal: (Laughs awkwardly) That's... that's because it's my job to tell you! (They enter a large, stable-like room) Abis Mal: Just wait till Agrabah trembles at my feet! (He laughs, pouring a bag of seed into a large dish) I'll rule it like... uh... like.... um, some big ruler guy! With a hat! Haroud: Ahh, yes, the plan. Well, let's hope it's every bit as successful as the test run. Abis Mal: Test run? (Waves his hands dismissively) It was a couple of guys. (A bird screeches; Abis Mal laughs) Let's see that kid and his genie fight a whole army of whirlwinds. (They leave the room. On the wall, there's the shadow of a large bird in a cage)

(Setting: Outside Abis Mal's lair, night.)

Aladdin: I promise, Abu. Just one feather then it's back to Agrabah. (They sneak inside. They overhear Abis Mal and Haroud talking) Haroud: (off-screen) Sir, I agree we should use our magical resources to do away with that— (Shadows approach the gang) Aladdin: Hide! (They run into the stable; Genie closes the door) Haroud: (off-screen) — no good Aladdin, once and for all! But may I suggest working on your aim? (He and Abis Mal pass the stable) Thanks to your little misdirected deep sleep spell, I dozed through half my— (trails off) (Aladdin and Genie peek through the door) Genie: Bet they have feathers! Back in a flash! (He flies after Abis Mal and Haroud) Aladdin: Genie, no! Abis Mal: Next time I see that Aladdin, bam! (Genie appears on his shoulder, searching him) I'll hit him with my "turn a man inside out" spell! Which is where... (searches his pockets; Genie hands him the scroll) ahhh, thank you! (Reads) Haroud: Just remember to look away this time. Abis Mal: (Shudders) Yes... the nightmares.

(Setting: the stable. Aladdin closes the door)

Iago: I don't know about you guys, but I don't look so good inside out. (Genie reappears) Genie: Sorry, Al, no feathers. But I found some keys and this neat whistle. (Aladdin steals it from him before he can blow it) Aladdin: Keep it down, they're still out there.

(The group walks further into the room and see a large cage, with a bird inside.) Genie: Told you the feathers were from a baby Roc. (The Roc cries) Aladdin: Oh, poor bird... Genie: (Cries) I bet it misses its mother.

Aladdin: There must be some way we can help it escape. Iago: (Annoyed) Yeah, it is a killer, but you promised the monkey just one feather. I mean, me, I'm here, but it wouldn't be fair to Abu if we didn't leave right this very second. Abu: Ohh, poor birdie... Aladdin: You'd risk your freedom to save the baby? (Abu chatters, then runs to the cage. He picks the lock on the door and stands back, accomplished. The door opens.) Iago: Just because you've got nothing to live for but pickin' dates! I want my internal organs to stay internal! (Genie pinches his beak shut) Genie: Shhh! Someone will hear you! (Abis Mal and Haroud enter the room) Genie: See? Abis Mal: Say hello to your guts! (Searches himself) Where did I... Haroud: Just call the guards. Abis Mal: Just call the... GUARDS!!! Aladdin: Genie, get the bird out of here! Iago: (Jumps into Genie's arms) Take me home, daddy! Genie: (Throws him aside) Wrong bird. (The baby Roc stumbles out of the cage. Genie turns into a cowboy and jumps onto his back) Genie: Git along, little birdie! (Riding him) Hup, hup!

(Genie and the Roc are stopped by three thieves. Genie pulls out a pencil and draws a door on one of the room's walls. The Roc goes through; Genie follows. The three thieves try to chase them, but they just run into the wall.)

(A few moments later, the thieves continue the chase) Genie: Fly, fly, fly! Up up up! (The Roc screeches—three more thieves approach from the front. They jump on the Roc, who spins like a whirlwind and sends the thieves flying.) Genie: (His neck twisted) Forgot... the whirlwind thing. (untwists himself)

(Aladdin, Abu, and Iago approach on Carpet) Aladdin: Genie, look out! Genie: (With many heads, each looking around and saying the word) Where? (Pulls his heads together) There!

(Abis Mal is about to tackle Genie; Aladdin and Carpet fight off the other thieves. Genie picks the Roc up and flies away with him. Abis Mal follows.)

Abis Mal: Put the bird down! (Thieves block the entrance) Genie: 5-4-3-2-1 lift off! (He turns into a rocket, the Roc and Abis Mal on his back. He flies off, missing the thieves; Abis Mal falls off of the Roc and lands on top of his men.) Next stop, the Crab Nebula! Abis Mal: ... they took my bird. I'm bird-less. They don't leave here alive! (The gang exits on Carpet) Aladdin: Gotta go! Iago: (Relieved) We made it! (A hook attached to a rope latches onto Carpet. Haroud stands beside the rope, which stretches as far as it can and pulls Carpet back; Aladdin, Iago, and Abu fall into the sand) Iago: (Dizzy) Can he do that? Abis Mal: Ruin my plans, eh? Heh heh, I'll do something... ho, really... unpleasant to you. Iago: Oh, here it comes! Inside-out city! Abis Mal: Oh, no, no, no, no, I'm not turning you inside out. I've got feathers! (pulls out a handful of golden feathers) Iago: ...that's good, right? (Abis Mal twirls the feathers, forming a giant whirlwind.) Abis: Awful blizzards we've been having, hmm fellas? (Carpet escapes the hook and flies to the gang. The whirlwind moves forward, trapping the four of them and leading them away, screaming.) Aladdin: Abu! Haroud: ... you do realize you just blew them back to Agrabah. Abis Mal: (Shocked) Agrabah... ye-ye-yes! That was... purely intentional! I want Aladdin to be there when his kingdom crumbles! Nyeh heh heh! So, gather the men and go crumble it, ok? Haroud: I am honored, great one. I assure you Agrabah will tremble at my feet. Abis Mal: ... no, no!! MY FEET! If any trembling happens, right here! Haroud: As you wish.

(Setting: Outside Agrabah's gates. Carpet pushes his way out of a sand dune, then helps Aladdin escape.)

Aladdin: (coughs) Abu? (Abu pops out of Aladdin's vest, groaning.) Abu! You're ok! (Iago emerges from the sand beneath Aladdin's knee) Iago: I, however, have a migraine that you wouldn't believe.

Aladdin: (Sighs) Abu, I'm sorry I ever made that bet with Fazal. I was wrong. Abu: Well... Aladdin: Friends? (Extends his hand) Abu: OK! (They shake hands)

(A shadow falls over the group)

Rasoul: Oh, did those wind demons give you a little trouble, sand gnat? Aladdin: They weren't demons! Abis Mal and his men were using Roc feathers to become whirlwinds, but we— Fazal: —rocks have feathers? Rasoul: Oh, now don't be so skeptical, Fazal. I'm sure Aladdin can convince us... with his proof.

Aladdin: ...well, I don't have any, really, but it's true! And— Rasoul: —and a bet is a bet. Or is the honor of Aladdin just another empty boast? (Aladdin and Abu look at each other, sadly) Aladdin: Abu... I'm sorry... Abu: Oh... bye, Aladdin. (Fazal leashes Abu.)Fazal: There we go, my little date picker! (Rasoul, Fazal, and Abu exit)

Aladdin: Abu! (Aladdin and Carpet hunch over, saddened. Abu, about to enter the city gate, turns to look at Aladdin one last time. He wipes away a tear, then exits after Fazal)

Iago: Does this mean we can get a dog? Aladdin: Iago! Iago: (Arms-crossed) What? (Breaking) Am I supposed to get sentimental? (Getting sad) Start talking about what a pal he was (falls over, pounding the ground with his fists) and how I'm gonna miss him? I am gonna miss that flea-bitten little ape! (Cries hysterically) (A strong wind blows in.)Man: (Leans over a balcony in the city) The wind demons! The wind demons return! Iago: Your proof, kid! It's your proof. The monkey's ours, come on! (Aladdin grins. They hop on Carpet) Iago: If you ever tell the monkey what I said, you're goin' down like a plate of birdseed, got it? (They fly into the city)

(A group of whirlwinds approach the city. They stop moving, revealing Abis Mal and his men. Rasoul and Fazal watch them from the high balcony) Rasoul: The wind demons— Fazal: —are not demons! (Abu jumps onto Fazal's turban, chattering)

Abis Mal: On to Agrabah! May its walls fall like... like... on to Agrabah! (He and his men form whirlwinds again and enter the city)

Rasoul: Fazal... Aladdin was right. (Carpet flies by; Aladdin grabs Abu) Aladdin: As you please, Rasoul!

Abu: Aladdin! (Aladdin and Abu hug) Aladdin: Always saving your tail.

(Carpet flies through the Marketplace) Aladdin: Let's see, I just need to pick up a few things.

(Aladdin steals the tarp off of a stand, followed by a snake charmer's snake and rope. Carpet flies out of the Marketplace) Aladdin: Now to take care of Abis Mal. Iago: Look, we got the monkey back. Shouldn't we just celebrate by running away?

(Carpet reaches the whirlwinds. Aladdin throws the tarp on top of one of the men and flattens him. Next, Aladdin drops the rope between two of the whirlwinds, causing the men to smash into each other. Finally, Aladdin tosses the snake into one of the whirlwinds, then flies off. ) Thief: (The snake is wrapped around his body) Stay away, stay away! (Aladdin and Abu watch the thief struggle) Aladdin and Abu:  Alright! (Give each other high-fives)

(Abis Mal gasps, then has a fit of anger) Abis Mal: (To two approaching whirlwinds) STOP! (They do so) See those guys? (he points to Aladdin and Abu) Knock'em out of the sky!

(The three men raise their feathers into the air and wave them back and forth. The action forms a giant whirlwind which captures Carpet, Aladdin, Abu, and Iago. The thieves put down the feathers and the whirlwind disappears; the thieves attack, with swords drawn.)

Abis Mal: Try and get outta this! (The men form the propellers and aim for the gang) Iago: Now who's gonna save our tails?!

(There's a loud screech. The thieves revert to normal, cowering. A large Roc flies over them. Genie, dressed a pilot, and the baby Roc sit on her back.) Genie: On your left is the beautiful city of Agrabah. (The bird's wings block the sun) Genie: Abis Mal is about to suffer disastrous defeat and the hands... err, wings, of Mom! Hit it, Mavis!

(Mavis flies at Abis Mal and his men; a huge storm cloud forms around her. Aladdin, Abu, and Iago hop on Carpet to escape. Abis Mal and his men try to flee, but the cloud overtakes them and assaults them. Nearby, Haroud watches.) Abis Mal: (Being dragged away) I'm gonna do something really—

Haroud: (Watches; dryly) I'm so glad I hitched my camel to his star.

(Genie reverts to normal and pats the baby Roc on the head) Genie: It's been fun, little guy. Be sure and send me a post card from the edge of the world!

(The Roc giggles; Genie flies to the ground. Mavis flies over Agrabah and into the distance. Aladdin and the others wave goodbye. Genie appears before them.) Genie: Would've been here sooner, but Mom was baking cookies! (Holds up a giant chocolate chip cookie)

(Setting: The Marketplace)

Rasoul: I... admit we were wrong, Aladdin, but Fazal has duties to perform and— Aladdin: —and none more important than those of personal date picker!

(Abu stands by a tree, his arms folded. There is a basket of dates beside him. Dates fall out of the tree and into the basket; Abu inspects one, then throws it aside) Abu: Yeck! (He scolds the person at the top of the tree)

Aladdin: He says "none but the juiciest fruit!"

(We pan up the tree to see Fazal, struggling to reach dates. He falls out of the tree, the basket ending up on his head. Abu climbs on top of him, picks one of the dates off of Fazal's body, and eats it.)

 THE END