The Cooper–Nowitzki Theorem


 * Penny: Holy crap on a cracker! (twice)


 * [Sheldon has just accepted a graduate student's request for dinner in his place]
 * Sheldon Cooper: What a nice girl.
 * Cartoon7.jpg
 * Howard Wolowitz: Sheldon, do you have any idea what just happened?
 * Sheldon Cooper: Yes, apparently I'm getting a free dinner.


 * Penny: I know this is none of my business, but I just... I have to ask - what's Sheldon's deal?
 * Leonard Hofstadter: What do you mean, "deal"?
 * Penny: You know, like, what's his deal? Is it girls...? Guys...? Sock puppets...?
 * Leonard Hofstadter: Honestly, we've been operating under the assumption that he has no deal.
 * Penny: Come on, everyone has a deal.
 * Howard Wolowitz: Not Sheldon. Over the years, we've formulated many theories about how he might reproduce. I'm an advocate of mitosis.
 * Penny: I'm sorry?
 * Howard Wolowitz: I believe one day Sheldon will eat an enormous amount of Thai food and split into two Sheldon's.
 * Leonard Hofstadter: On the other hand, I think Sheldon might be the larval form of his species. Someday he'll spin a cocoon and emerge two months later with moth wings and an exoskeleton.
 * Penny: Okay, well, thanks for the nightmares.


 * Ramona Nowitzki: Oh, sorry I’m late. I just got so caught up reading the draft of your latest paper.
 * Sheldon Cooper: Did you enjoy the humorous footnote where I illustrate mirror-symmetry by likening it to the Flash playing tennis with himself?
 * Ramona Nowitzki: So funny. But the idea that you might be able to incorporate gravity, I have to tell you, I found it physically exhilarating.
 * Sheldon Cooper: My hypotheses tend to have that effect.


 * (After Ramona quotes Sheldon)
 * Sheldon Cooper: (To Leonard) You heard her. How can I argue with myself?


 * Penny: Don't go in there.
 * Leonard Hofstadter: Why? What are they doing in there?
 * Penny: I can only explain it in a therapist's office with dolls.
 * (Penny goes in)
 * Penny: Yeah, you're right.


 * Sheldon Cooper: How can I ever repay you?
 * Ramona Nowitzki: Would you consider naming it the Cooper-Nowitzki theorem?
 * Sheldon Cooper: Who's Nowitzki?
 * Ramona Nowitzki: I'm Nowitzki.
 * Sheldon Cooper: You want me to share credit?
 * Ramona Nowitzki: Uh-huh.
 * Sheldon Cooper: Get out!
 * (Outside in the hall, Penny is coming up the stairs just as Ramona comes out of the apartment with her bags)
 * Penny: Oh, hey, hi,
 * Ramona Nowitzki: (angrily) Oh, bite me! (She runs down the stairs)
 * Penny: (confused) Sisters?