The Job (The Office)

Jim: Karen suggested that I...get a haircut for the interview tomorrow, so I could look...presentable, and not, as she so lovingly puts it, homeless.

Oscar: Hey Pam, I've been meaning to say something to you - I really miss our friendship.

Stanley: I've never heard you talk that much - I thought it was Kelly!

Kelly: Are you kidding? I would never have done that - it was Patheticville - no offense, Pam.

Meredith: You know what? Don't even worry about it - everyone was so drunk, I bet no one even remembers what you said.

Creed: I remember. I blogged the whole thing!

Creed: www.creedthoughts.gov.www/creedthoughts - check it out!

Ryan: Last year, Creed asked me how to set up a blog. Wanting to protect the world from being exposed to Creed's brain, I...opened up a Word document on his computer and put an address at the top. I've read some of it - even for the internet, it's...pretty shocking.

Dwight: How would you like to spend the night with the Regional Manager of Dunder-Mifflin Scranton?

Angela: No, Dwight, I don't care if that's how they consolidated power in Ancient Rome...

Dwight: No, no, no...not Michael - me! I'm taking his job!

Angela: Not now!...Goodbye, Kelly Kapoor!

Dwight: Once I'm officially Regional Manager my first order of business will be to demote Jim Halpert. So I will need a new number two. My ideal choice? Jack Bauer. But he is unavailable. Fictional. And overqualified.

Meredith: I would never do that, waste of money...in my experience, guys are way more attracted to the back of you than to the front.

Kevin: I love fake boobs! Oftentimes, you find them on strippers.

Creed: I find it offensive. Au natural, baby, that's how I like 'em - swing low, sweet chariots.

David Wallace: What do you think about Michael Scott?

Karen: He's a very nice man, and he's very well suited for the job he has now.

David Wallace: This is off the record...

Karen: He would be a disaster!

Pam: I haven't heard anything. But I bet Jim got the job - I mean, why wouldn't he? He's totally qualified, and smart, everyone loves him, and...if he never comes back again? That's OK - we're friends, and I'm sure we'll stay friends. We just, we never got the timing right, you know? I shot him down, and then, he did the same to me, and...but you know what? It's OK. I'm totally fine everything is going to be totally...

Jim: Pam...are you free for dinner tonight?

Pam: Yes...

Jim: All right, then...it's a date!

Pam: I'm sorry -what was the question?