Slugger


 * [Lilo is addressing to her softball team, which consists of Stitch, Jumba, Yin, Yang, Richter, Kixx, and Splodyhead]
 * Lilo: Alright, men, and evil geniuses, and genetic mutants from outer space. We are here today for one purpose and one purpose only: to destroy Mertle's softball team! So let's get out there and really tear up the basepads! [Stitch dashes out to the fields and starts ripping the bases apart] I didn't mean that literally, Stitch.
 * Jumba: Eh, question. Once team is beaten, do losers become our servants for life?
 * Lilo: What?! No!
 * Jumba: Hmm, is how team sports work on my planet.


 * [Stitch shoves a crate on Gantu's head, causing him to drop Slugger]
 * Lilo: Hey, there, little guy. We're not going to hurt you. We're here to give you a new home. But see that guy over there? [points to Gantu, who still has the crate over his head]
 * Gantu: I'm going to vaporize you, trog, just as soon as I can see you!
 * [Slugger nods while snorting]
 * Lilo: Well, if you come with us, we'll keep you safe from him. Okay? [holds Slugger's hand]


 * [Stitch tests out Slugger's batting skills by throwing avocados at him]
 * Lilo: Coconuts, avocados, wow he really likes to bat things around.
 * [Slugger accidentally splats and avocado on a picture, which Stitch licks clean]
 * Stitch: Mmmm, guacamole!
 * Jumba: Experiment 608 will swat at many different things. In addition to deflecting airborne projectiles launched at enemies, he is also programmed to swat away balls, toys and fruit thrown over fence by annoying neighbor children.
 * Lilo: He hits balls? Tomorrow, Lilo's Lasers hit the practice field! We're gonna beat Mertle's team yet!
 * Pleakley: Ooh, for the rematch, will we be the home team or the away team? Because according to my research, the home team wears a white uniform while the...
 * Lilo: Uh... You know what, Pleakley? It's just practice. And you're so good already, that you don't have to come.
 * Pleakley: [hurt] Oh, okay, thanks.


 * [Mertle agrees to give Gantu Slugger in exchange for him being in her team]
 * Mertle: Hey, Weirdlo! Ready to meet your doom?
 * Gantu: We're going to destroy you.
 * Lilo: You're cheating! You put Gantu on your team!
 * Mertle: So? You have a new player, too!
 * Lilo: It's not the same.
 * Mertle: You're just scared!
 * Lilo: I'm not scared!
 * Mertle: Then let's sweeten the bet: Whoever wins, gets him! [points to Slugger]
 * Lilo: Slugger?! I bet I know whose idea that is. [Gantu chuckles evilly] You're on! I'll even have you first at bat.
 * Mertle: Who said we were playing baseball? I thought we'd play basketball this time.
 * Lilo: What?!
 * Mertle: You did say any time, any place, any game!
 * Lilo: I... I did?!
 * Stitch: Ih. You did.
 * Lilo: But I... I didn't mean to!


 * [Lilo's Lasers had thanks to Pleakley's amazing basketball skills]
 * Lilo: Pleakley, I just wanna say thanks for being loyal to me. It made me realize I should've support you when you were on my baseball team.
 * Pleakley: Oh, I don't blame you one little bit. I was awful at baseball!
 * Lilo: It doesn't matter. Loyalty to your friends is way more important than winning. It's even more important than a stack of Elvis records.
 * Pleakley: Please, I'm getting all teary.
 * Lilo: You didn't tell us you can play B-ball though.
 * Pleakley: It turns out that Earth basketball is is virtually identical to Priznolaprack on my home planet. I was a four-time Priznolaprack grand champion.
 * Lilo: Well, thanks to you, we got to keep Slugger, and help him find his one true place.
 * [Lilo shows how Slugger is helping the softball coach show the kids how to bat]