Lobo For President


 * Campaign Manager: What others promise, he'll deliver. Integrity, truthfulness, candor. A president who reach out a hand to forge a new partnership with the people.
 * Lobo: This is crap!
 * Campaign Manager: Lobo, the end of slickness and evasion. A president who is dynamic, resourceful, able to make a difference in people's lives. And he gives them what they deserve. Lobo, he brings people together. Real leadership. That means honest answers to tough questions, solutions not blamed. Lobo will put an end to the heart of squabbling and divisiveness. He's a man who cares more about results than ideology.
 * Lobo: Ear lead, you scrotal sacks! [Lobo starts shooting from his gun, killing several congressmen.]
 * Campaign Manager: And nows how marginally painful it is to get the job done.
 * Lobo: Not enough executive experience, my opponent says. A vote for Lobo and frag this! This is crap! [Lobo tears off his t-shirt] Let's cut the bullshit in this fucking place. You jackasses and assholes don't give a shit about issues! Stop it, you fucking bastitch! Kiss my hairy, infested ass! All you jack-offs want is a guy who looks fucking good on TV! [The cameraman explodes in blood] FUCK this! The end you've been waiting for. [He moons at the camera]