The Password


 * IT'S MY TURN!
 * NO! IT IS MINE!
 * NO! IT'S MY TURN!
 * Good move, but I can take it.
 * , and : Password?
 * But who?
 * I did it.
 * Have you just spent the whole night hiding behind that door for dramatic effect?
 * No.
 * Then why does it looks like your bladder is about to explode?
 * You kids spend too much time on that thing! You should be playing outside.
 * Why do I have a feeling that you sound like Mom right now?
 * Uh...
 * "Your mother has nothing to do with this! I take full responsibility for being the bad cop this time. Read this, or you sleep on the couch tonight."
 * Sorry guys, you know she can be a real dragon sometimes.
 * I HEARD THAT!
 * Why do I have a feeling that you sound like Mom right now?
 * Uh...
 * "Your mother has nothing to do with this! I take full responsibility for being the bad cop this time. Read this, or you sleep on the couch tonight."
 * Sorry guys, you know she can be a real dragon sometimes.
 * I HEARD THAT!
 * Sorry guys, you know she can be a real dragon sometimes.
 * I HEARD THAT!

Whats the password?

 * But it's my turn!
 * Uh! HEY! C'mon! you promised!
 * Try the word "Password."
 * Ha, c'mon. Even dad's not that dumb.
 * Ha, it can't be that complicated. Let's just use our heads.
 * "Password clue: favorite child?"
 * [Inhales deeply] Ooh…ah…ouch. Sorry man. This is awkward.
 * What the what!?
 * [Gasps] Really? [Cries] This moment is so much bigger than me. I would like to thank my parents, and my manager.
 * Well if it's not you, and its not me then who could the favorite child be?
 * Come on, guys! I've got real work to do. You just waste time on Elmore Plus!
 * Anais, who would dad's favorite child be if it wasn't me or Darwin?
 * Yes!
 * What are you doing?
 * A victory dance, we cracked the password!
 * It doesn't matter. Don't you get it? Anais is the favorite child.
 * Yeah but-oh.
 * What is that?
 * It's a sad dance.
 * Oh! Okay.
 * Anais, who would dad's favorite child be if it wasn't me or Darwin?
 * Yes!
 * What are you doing?
 * A victory dance, we cracked the password!
 * It doesn't matter. Don't you get it? Anais is the favorite child.
 * Yeah but-oh.
 * What is that?
 * It's a sad dance.
 * Oh! Okay.
 * Yeah but-oh.
 * What is that?
 * It's a sad dance.
 * Oh! Okay.
 * Oh! Okay.

Who Is The Favorite?

 * Alright! So here's the plan to get me to be the favorite! First we-
 * Wait, why do you get to be the favorite?!
 * Well because, you're...you know? Technically...from a biological point of view- adopted  you know...?
 * No, actually I don't. Why don't you tell me?
 * It's because you're...already my favorite! Huh?
 * Ha ha! I knew it would work.
 * [Still smiling] Darn you.
 * Anyway, I'm not the enemy. [Camera goes to Anais being petted by Richard. They are at the other side of the table] Look at her over there acting all innocent.
 * [Hums happily]
 * [Imitates Anais while making a face] She knows she's the favorite.
 * Maybe we're overreacting.
 * Overreacting? Dude! They're even finishing each others-
 * -Sandwiches!
 * What? No. Sentences.
 * Sweetie, can I finish your-
 * Sandwich? Sure [Laughs happily] See you later!
 * Sandwiches as well? Oh man, this is total-
 * Sentences!
 * Aw. This is so unfair. Why is she the favorite anyway?
 * Well, maybe because she's nice to him.
 * Well, lets be even nicer!
 * Sentences!
 * Aw. This is so unfair. Why is she the favorite anyway?
 * Well, maybe because she's nice to him.
 * Well, lets be even nicer!
 * Well, lets be even nicer!

Being Nice

 * Uh-I'm gonna make another sandwich! [Runs off to kitchen. Gumball and Darwin follow after him (literally in a flash).]
 * Please dad, sit down. We'll do it-wait! Even better, we'll carry you there! [Lifts Richard with Darwin]
 * No wait a-[Gets bumped into a wall] P-please put me down!
 * [To Darwin] Quick! Put him in his chair.
 * Oh. Sorry Mr. Dad.
 * And sorry for keeping you waiting. [Sets down plate with the large sandwich] Here you go. An all-you-can-eat sandwich!
 * [Still with tooth stuck in the table] How do you know I deserve it?
 * Well, of course you deserve it. [Takes sandwich] Here-
 * -let us help you! [Gumball drops the whole sandwich into Richard's mouth. Richard starts choking]
 * I think he's trying to say something.
 * Oh, sorry. It's a bit dry. Here, have some mayo!
 * [Gumball squirts lots of mayonnaise into Richard's mouth. The mayo starts spilling from his nose, mouth and eyes]
 * Dude, he's choking.
 * Do the Heimlich maneuver!
 * I-I cant! He's too fat-
 * Ah! That's not a very nice word.
 * H-he's got too much personality! [Gumball unwraps his arms from Richard, who then falls on his back]
 * Come on!
 * 3, 2, 1!
 * Do the Heimlich maneuver!
 * I-I cant! He's too fat-
 * Ah! That's not a very nice word.
 * H-he's got too much personality! [Gumball unwraps his arms from Richard, who then falls on his back]
 * Come on!
 * 3, 2, 1!
 * Come on!
 * 3, 2, 1!
 * 3, 2, 1!

A Nice Hot Bath

 * Dad, we're sorry about the sandwich thing so we made you a bath.
 * But I don't need a bath!
 * Don't be silly. Just try it!
 * I don't know. All these candles and the water on the floor doesn't seem-AH!
 * Aaaahhh. [The hot water turns Richard's body red] Hot. Hot! HOOOOOOOOT!
 * Aaaahhh. [The hot water turns Richard's body red] Hot. Hot! HOOOOOOOOT!

Saving Richard From A Dog

 * Ah, finally. Some peace and quiet.
 * So remind me again how this is supposed to work?
 * It's easy. You put him in a perilous situation, and then save him. Then we become his favorites.
 * Oh, that makes sense.
 * Pass me the diversion device.
 * Dont worry Dad! We'll save you!
 * This isn't working, we need to take a different approach.
 * Dont worry Dad! We'll save you!
 * This isn't working, we need to take a different approach.
 * This isn't working, we need to take a different approach.
 * This isn't working, we need to take a different approach.

Anais Saying Bad Things About Richard

 * (TV): My dad is a -- dork! -- He looks like -- a legged -- ham -- in a pink -- leotard -- and smells like -- the underside of a - wart strap (?) [Static]
 * Ah. I know. Not such a cute little bunny after all.
 * It's okay, Mr. Dad. We're here for you.
 * Ha ha ha! This is a great idea! Then we can make it look like she said bad things about Mr. Dad, when she didn't! Oh wait, is this thing still on?
 * THAT'S IT! I'VE HAD WITH YOU TWO! You've choked me! You've burned me! The steak you fed me was undercooked! I think I need to tell you off, but I've never been the bad cop before! What would your mother do!?
 * She would tell us to go to our room.
 * THANK YOU! THAT'S REALLY HELPFUL! NOW GO TO YOUR ROOM!
 * LOOK! We've been nice to you all day, okay? [Gumball and Darwin go upstairs] We've tried everything but nothing works! Well you know what dad? You're only our second favorite parent, anyway!
 * So, you guys have a good day? [Gumball and Darwin ignore her] Richard, are you having a good day?
 * DOES IT MATTER? WHATEVER I DO, I'LL ALWAYS BE THE BAD COP, AND YOU'LL ALWAYS BE THE FAVORITE!
 * Favorite? What are you talking about?
 * It's easy for you. But somebody has to keep these kids in line, and if that means I lose the popularity contest-
 * Richard, parenting is not a competition!
 * What? Afraid you'll lose?
 * I really doubt that but it's not about-
 * OH YEAH? You two, in the car, NOW!
 * and : What? Why?
 * Because there's only one way to guarantee your children's affection. YOU BUY IT! Boys, I'm getting you a new computer!
 * Oh no you're not!
 * Why not?
 * BECAUSE I'M GONNA DO IT FIRST
 * and : What? Why?
 * Because there's only one way to guarantee your children's affection. YOU BUY IT! Boys, I'm getting you a new computer!
 * Oh no you're not!
 * Why not?
 * BECAUSE I'M GONNA DO IT FIRST

Richard vs Nicole

 * Everybody strapped in? Good! Let's go!
 * Okay! Everybody ready?
 * Kids! Kids! Just jump across!
 * No! Because that would be insane.
 * Yes, fair point. Richard, stop the car! This is stupid!
 * If it's stupid, why don't you stop first?
 * Alright, I will! [Drives back a little to the kids] You kids have your seatbelts on?
 * Kids, close your eyes!
 * Ah! Stop! This is going too far!
 * Yeah, but look on the bright side: on the astronomically slim chance we survive this, we get a new computer!
 * Just give me the kids, Nicole. There's nowhere else to go!
 * Oh really? Hold on, kids! We're taking a detour!
 * Whoohoo! Huh, that was a little tense. Why don't we calm down with a game? I spy with my little eye-
 * and : TRUCK!
 * No, it begins with an "M."
 * and : [Thinks for a while] MASSIVE TRUCK!
 * No, it's magpie-
 * Oh. Uh Richard, do you have the card?
 * Sure [Gives card]
 * Thanks [Used card, then throws it away]
 * I'm not giving up, Nicole!
 * [Shows a wrench]
 * [Gasps] So?
 * No, mom! Wait! Stop, this is crazy!
 * Uh, the best one's in the middle.
 * No, mom!
 * Hey! What's going on!?
 * No time to explain! Just let me pay for this!
 * I was here first!
 * STOP! Look at yourselves. We don't care about the computer, we just want our parents to get along.
 * [Whispers] Or both.
 * Oh gosh. You're right! I'm so sorry Richard.
 * [Holds hands] No, I'm sorry. You were right. Parenting isn't a competition.
 * We can take it in turns to be the favorite, and the bad cop. Thanks Larry, but we don't a new computer.
 * [Quietly] Goshdarnit!
 * Yeah, we've got each other.
 * Awww. I'm so glad you guys aren't fighting anymore-'cause SOMEBODY HAS TO PAY FOR ALL THIS!
 * Oh of course. Allow me. Oops! [Approaches the counter, "accidentally" drops something]
 * Wait a minute. This is a cracker.
 * Ohhh you gotta be kidding me-! [Eats cracker]
 * I was here first!
 * STOP! Look at yourselves. We don't care about the computer, we just want our parents to get along.
 * [Whispers] Or both.
 * Oh gosh. You're right! I'm so sorry Richard.
 * [Holds hands] No, I'm sorry. You were right. Parenting isn't a competition.
 * We can take it in turns to be the favorite, and the bad cop. Thanks Larry, but we don't a new computer.
 * [Quietly] Goshdarnit!
 * Yeah, we've got each other.
 * Awww. I'm so glad you guys aren't fighting anymore-'cause SOMEBODY HAS TO PAY FOR ALL THIS!
 * Oh of course. Allow me. Oops! [Approaches the counter, "accidentally" drops something]
 * Wait a minute. This is a cracker.
 * Ohhh you gotta be kidding me-! [Eats cracker]
 * Wait a minute. This is a cracker.
 * Ohhh you gotta be kidding me-! [Eats cracker]
 * Ohhh you gotta be kidding me-! [Eats cracker]
 * Ohhh you gotta be kidding me-! [Eats cracker]

The One Behind It

 * Well, I guess the important thing is you know there's no favorite in this family. Never was, never will be.
 * So, are you gonna change the password on the computer now, Mr. Dad?
 * What do you mean?
 * Oh, you know. "Anais," favorite child? It's the password.
 * No it isn't. [Whispers to Nicole] The password is "Password." Crafty, huh?
 * But who else could have changed the- [Realizes] [Gasps] clever girl.
 * Nyeh. It's all yours, guys. I've been on it all day. [Walks through them] Oh, good luck logging in. I changed the password.
 * Nyeh. It's all yours, guys. I've been on it all day. [Walks through them] Oh, good luck logging in. I changed the password.
 * Nyeh. It's all yours, guys. I've been on it all day. [Walks through them] Oh, good luck logging in. I changed the password.