The Comic-Con Conundrum


 * Amy (to Sheldon): I'm not going to Comic-Con with you!
 * Sheldon: Well, maybe what's in my pants will change your mind.


 * Leonard: Maybe you should find someone to help you get your finances under control.
 * Raj: Like a business manager?
 * Sheldon: Oh, absolutely not! You can't afford to hire somebody who'll forbid you from spending your money on foolish expenses. It's a foolish expense and I forbid it.
 * Howard: Oh, what if there's somebody who just likes controlling other people and stealing joy from their lives?
 * Sheldon: He sounds like a sociopath.
 * Leonard: We don't know; his mother never had him tested.
 * Sheldon: You're talking about me. Very funny. Although... I would enjoy drawing up a budget and forcing Raj to adhere to it without an ounce of compassion.


 * Leonard: So, this is the main Comic-Con floor. It's where all the vendors and exhibits are.
 * Penny: Wow! There's a lot of people jammed in there.
 * Leonard: I know. Sometimes Howard wears a striped shirt so we cam play 'Where's Wolowitz?'


 * Amy: Penny says they're ready to go.
 * Sheldon: Very well. Prepare for a long night of deceit.
 * Amy: Sheldon, women can wear makeup. It's not lying!
 * Sheldon: I was talking about Leonard. And if makeup is so truthful, why is it called concealer?

[last lines]
 * Sheldon: There's my pretty girlfriend. [pats her shoulder]
 * Amy: I'm not going with you to Comic-Con.
 * Sheldon: You, what! Can't a man just be happy to see his woman and pat her on her second most erogenous ball and socket joint?
 * Amy: He can, but it's still not changing my mind.
 * Sheldon: [seductively] Well, maybe what's in my pants will change your mind. [Amy turns to face him, hopefully]
 * Sheldon: It's a list of this year's panelists. It's long, isn't it?

[first lines]
 * Sheldon: [using a mechanical calculator] Uh-huh. Interesting. OK.
 * Raj: How bad is it?
 * Sheldon: Let me put it this way: do you own a barrel and suspenders?
 * Raj: Are you serious?
 * Sheldon: I'm not wearing this visor to play women's golf.
 * Penny: [Penny enters] Hi. Oh, let me guess. You guys are drafting your fantasy accounting firms.
 * Leonard: We're helping Raj figure out his finances.
 * Penny: Oh, he has a job; how bad can it be?
 * Sheldon: Well, his rent and car lease are exceedingly high. You couple that with his penchant for dining out and shopping...
 * Penny: Wai-wait, not shopping for clothes right? Because look... [gestures at Raj]


 * Amy: You're actually going to Comic-Con?
 * Penny: Well, Leonard wants me to do more stuff like that with him, so I thought maybe this year I'll tag along.
 * Amy: Well, that's sweet. I bet you'll have fun.
 * Penny: You wanna come?
 * Amy: No thanks. I already live in a place all the nerds come to.
 * Penny: Please? I went to your boring thing last month.
 * Amy: [indignant] My aunt's funeral?
 * Penny: Come on, even you checked your e-mail during the eulogy.


 * Penny: You know what, it's no big deal. I can put up with anything for three days.
 * Amy: Comic-Con is five days.
 * Penny: Are you kidding me?


 * Penny: You know, maybe it won't be that bad. Leonard says it's really mainstream now. Comic books aren't just for sad nerds anymore. [They pass Raj in an Aquaman costume waiving a sign for ComiCenter]
 * Penny: I mean, it's still a key part of their demographic.


 * Leonard: Now we're going as Hulk and She-Hulk! I don't wanna take my shirt off at Comic-Con!
 * Sheldon: If I may speak for Comic-Con, we don't want that either.


 * Howard: Dinner's almost ready. If you like meat loaf, I'm sure you'll like its cousin, bowl of meat.


 * Leonard: I thought your father paid all your credit cards.
 * Raj: I have a card for emergencies that I pay for myself.
 * Sheldon: What kind of emergency happened at the LA Zoo?
 * Raj: I sponsor a penguin. They're losing their home to global warming, my car gives seven miles to the gallon and I felt bad.


 * Howard: You actually think Penny will have fun at Comic Con?
 * Leonard: No, which will make me miserable, which is usually Sheldon's job.
 * Sheldon: She's gonna hate waiting in line for the panels.
 * Howard: She's gonna hate the crowds at the panels.
 * Sheldon: She's gonna hate the panels.
 * Leonard: She's gonna hate how often we say the word "panels".


 * Leonard: Hang on, so I have to bring Penny, you can't afford it, Howard's gonna get in trouble, and he' s going to have a great time?
 * Sheldon: I'm going to go as Dumbledore.