Toby and the Stout Gentleman/Toby the Tram Engine

Ringo Starr UK Version:

 * Ringo Starr: Toby is a Tram Engine. He has cow-catches and side-plates and doesn’t look like a steam engine at all. He takes trucks from farms and villages to the Main Line, and is cheerful to everyone he meets. He has a coach called Henrietta, who has seen better days.
 * Henrietta: It’s not fair at all!
 * Ringo Starr: She grumbles, remembering that she used to be full, and nine trucks would rattle behind her. Now there are only three or four; for the farms and factories sent their goods mostly by lorry. Toby is always careful. The cars, buses, and lorries often have accidents. Toby hasn’t had an accident for years, but the buses are crowded, and Henrietta is empty. A lady and a stout gentleman stood on Toby’s platform. He was, of course, the Fat Controller but Toby didn’t know this yet.
 * Stephen and Bridget Hatt: Come on grandfather.
 * Ringo Starr: Cried the children.
 * Stephen and Bridget Hatt: Do look at this engine.
 * The Fat Controller: That’s a tram engine, Stephen.
 * Ringo Starr: Said the Fat Controller.
 * Bridget Hatt: Is it electric?
 * Ringo Starr: Asked Bridget.
 * Toby: Whoosh!
 * Ringo Starr: Hissed Toby.
 * Stephen Hatt: Sh! Sh!
 * Ringo Starr: Said her brother.
 * Stephen Hatt: You’ve offended him.
 * Bridget Hatt: But trams are electric, aren’t they?
 * The Fat Controller: They are mostly, but this is a steam tram.
 * Stephen and Bridget Hatt: May we go in it grandfather? Please!
 * The Fat Controller: Stop.
 * Ringo Starr: Said the Fat Controller to the Guard. They all scrambled into Henrietta.
 * Henrietta: Hip Hip Hurray!
 * Ringo Starr: Chanted Henrietta. But Toby did not sing.
 * Toby: Electric indeed! Electric indeed!
 * Ringo Starr: He snorted. He was very hurt.
 * The Fat Controller: What is your name?
 * Ringo Starr: Asked the Fat Controller.
 * Toby: Toby, Sir.
 * The Fat Controller: Thank you, Toby, for a very nice ride.
 * Toby: Thank you, Sir.
 * Ringo Starr: Said Toby. He felt better now.
 * Toby: This gentleman.
 * Ringo Starr: He thought.
 * Toby: Is a gentleman who knows how to speak to engines.
 * Ringo Starr: The children came every day for a fortnight. Sometimes they rode with the Guard, sometimes in empty trucks, on the last day of all the Driver invited them into his cab. All were sorry when they had to go away, and the Fat Controller and his family thanked everyone.
 * Toby: Come again soon.
 * Ringo Starr: Replied Toby.
 * Stephen and Bridget Hatt: We will, we will.
 * Ringo Starr: Called the children, and they waved till Toby was out of sight. The months passed. Toby had few trucks, and fewer passengers.
 * Toby’s Driver: Our last day, Toby.
 * Ringo Starr: Said his Driver one morning.
 * Toby’s Driver: The Manager says we must close tomorrow.
 * Ringo Starr: That day everyone wanted the chance of a last ride. The passengers joked and sang, but Toby and his Driver wished they wouldn’t.
 * Passengers: Goodbye, Toby.
 * Ringo Starr: Said the passengers afterwards.
 * Passengers: We are sorry your line is closing down.
 * Toby: So am I.
 * Ringo Starr: Said Toby.
 * Toby: Nobody wants me.
 * Ringo Starr: Toby thought, and went unhappily to sleep. Next morning the shed was flung open, and he woke with a start to see his Driver waving a piece of paper.
 * Toby’s Driver and Fireman: Wake up, Toby.
 * Ringo Starr: They shouted.
 * Toby’s Driver and Fireman: And listen to this; it’s a letter from the stout gentleman.
 * Ringo Starr: Toby listened and… But I mustn’t tell you any more, or I shall spoil the next story.

Ringo Starr US Version:

 * Ringo Starr: Toby is a Tram Engine. He has cow-catches and side-plates and doesn’t look like a steam engine at all. He takes freight cars from farms and villages to the Main Line, and is cheerful to everyone he meets. He has a coach called Henrietta, who has seen better days.
 * Henrietta: It’s not fair at all!
 * Ringo Starr: She grumbles, remembering that she used to be full, and nine cars would rattle behind her. Now there are only three or four; for the farms and factories sent their goods mostly by truck. Toby is always careful. The cars, buses, and trucks often have accidents. Toby hasn’t had an accident for years, but the buses are crowded, and Henrietta is empty. A lady and a stout gentleman stood on Toby’s platform. He was, of course, Sir Topham Hatt but Toby didn’t know this yet.
 * Stephen and Bridget Hatt: Come on grandfather.
 * Ringo Starr: Cried the children.
 * Stephen and Bridget Hatt: Do look at this engine.
 * Sir Topham Hatt: That’s a tram engine, Stephen.
 * Ringo Starr: Said Sir Topham Hatt.
 * Bridget Hatt: Is it electric?
 * Ringo Starr: Asked Bridget.
 * Toby: Whoosh!
 * Ringo Starr: Hissed Toby.
 * Stephen Hatt: Sh! Sh!
 * Ringo Starr: Said her brother.
 * Stephen Hatt: You’ve offended him.
 * Bridget Hatt: But trams are electric, aren’t they?
 * Sir Topham Hatt: They are mostly, but this is a steam tram.
 * Stephen and Bridget Hatt: May we go in it grandfather? Please!
 * Sir Topham Hatt: Stop.
 * Ringo Starr: Said Sir Topham Hatt to the Conductor. They all scrambled into Henrietta.
 * Henrietta: Hip Hip Hurray!
 * Ringo Starr: Chanted Henrietta. But Toby did not sing.
 * Toby: Electric indeed! Electric indeed!
 * Ringo Starr: He snorted. He was proud of being a steam train.
 * Sir Topham Hatt: What is your name?
 * Ringo Starr: Asked Sir Topham Hatt.
 * Toby: Toby, Sir.
 * Sir Topham Hatt: Thank you, Toby, for a very nice ride.
 * Toby: Thank you, Sir.
 * Ringo Starr: Said Toby. He felt better now.
 * Toby: This gentleman.
 * Ringo Starr: He thought.
 * Toby: Is a gentleman who knows how to speak to engines.
 * Ringo Starr: The children came every day for two weeks. Sometimes they rode with the Conductor, sometimes in empty cars, on the last day of all the Driver invited them into his cab. All were sorry when they had to go away, and Sir Topham Hatt and his family thanked everyone.
 * Toby: Come again soon.
 * Ringo Starr: Replied Toby.
 * Stephen and Bridget Hatt: We will, we will.
 * Ringo Starr: Called the children, and they waved till Toby was out of sight. The months passed. Toby had few cars, and fewer passengers.
 * Toby’s Driver: Our last day, Toby.
 * Ringo Starr: Said his Driver one morning.
 * Toby’s Driver: The Manager says we must close tomorrow.
 * Ringo Starr: That day everyone wanted the chance of a last ride. The passengers joked and sang, but Toby and his Driver wished they wouldn’t.
 * Passengers: Goodbye, Toby.
 * Ringo Starr: Said the passengers afterwards.
 * Passengers: We are sorry your line is closing down.
 * Toby: So am I.
 * Ringo Starr: Said Toby.
 * Toby: Nobody wants me.
 * Ringo Starr: Toby thought, and went unhappily to sleep. Next morning the shed was flung open, and old Toby woke with a start to see his Driver waving a piece of paper at him.
 * Toby’s Driver and Fireman: Wake up, Toby.
 * Ringo Starr: They shouted excitedly.
 * Toby’s Driver and Fireman: The mail has arrived, and there's a letter for us from the stout gentleman. Maybe it's good news.

George Carlin US Version:

 * George Carlin: Toby is a Tram Engine. He has cow-catches and side-plates and doesn’t look like a steam engine at all. He takes freight cars from farms and villages to the Main Line, and is cheerful to everyone he meets. He has a coach called Henrietta, who has seen better days.
 * Henrietta: It’s not fair at all!
 * George Carlin: She grumbles, remembering that she used to be full, and nine cars would rattle behind her. Now there are only three or four; for the farms and factories sent their goods mostly by truck. Toby is always careful. The cars, buses, and trucks often have accidents. Toby hasn’t had an accident for years, but the buses are crowded, and Henrietta is empty. A lady and a stout gentleman stood on Toby’s platform. He was, of course, Sir Topham Hatt but Toby didn’t know this yet.
 * Stephen and Bridget Hatt: Come on grandfather.
 * George Carlin: Cried the children.
 * Stephen and Bridget Hatt: Do look at this engine.
 * Sir Topham Hatt: That’s a tram engine, Stephen.
 * George Carlin: Said Sir Topham Hatt.
 * Bridget Hatt: Is it electric?
 * George Carlin: Asked Bridget.
 * Toby: Whoosh!
 * George Carlin: Hissed Toby.
 * Stephen Hatt: Sh!
 * George Carlin: Said her brother.
 * Stephen Hatt: You’ve offended him.
 * Bridget Hatt: But trams are electric, aren’t they?
 * Sir Topham Hatt: They are mostly, but this is a steam tram.
 * Stephen and Bridget Hatt: May we go in it grandfather? Please!
 * Sir Topham Hatt: Stop.
 * George Carlin: Said Sir Topham Hatt to the Conductor. They all scrambled into Henrietta.
 * Henrietta: Hip Hip Hurray!
 * George Carlin: Chanted Henrietta. But Toby didn't sing.
 * Toby: Electric indeed! Electric indeed!
 * George Carlin: He snorted. He was proud of being a steam train.
 * Sir Topham Hatt: What is your name?
 * George Carlin: Asked Sir Topham Hatt.
 * Toby: Toby, Sir.
 * Sir Topham Hatt: Thank you, Toby, for a very nice ride.
 * Toby: Thank you, Sir.
 * George Carlin: Said Toby. He felt better now.
 * Toby: This gentleman.
 * George Carlin: He thought.
 * Toby: Is a gentleman who knows how to speak to engines.
 * George Carlin: The children came every day for two weeks. Sometimes they rode with the Conductor, sometimes in empty cars, on the last day of all the Driver invited them into his cab. All were sorry when they had to go away, and Sir Topham Hatt and his family thanked everyone.
 * Toby: Come again soon.
 * George Carlin: Replied Toby.
 * Stephen and Bridget Hatt: We will, we will.
 * George Carlin: Called the children, and they waved till Toby was out of sight. The months passed. Toby had few cars, and fewer passengers.
 * Toby’s Driver: Our last day, Toby.
 * George Carlin: Said his Driver one morning.
 * Toby’s Driver: The Manager says we must close tomorrow.
 * George Carlin: That day everyone wanted the chance of a last ride. The passengers joked and sang, but Toby and his Driver wished they wouldn’t.
 * Passengers: Goodbye, Toby.
 * George Carlin: Said the passengers afterwards.
 * Passengers: We're sorry your line is closing down.
 * Toby: So am I.
 * George Carlin: Said Toby.
 * Toby: Nobody wants me.
 * George Carlin: Toby thought, and went unhappily to sleep. Next morning the shed was flung open, and old Toby woke with a start to see his Driver waving a piece of paper at him.
 * Toby’s Driver: Wake up, Toby.
 * George Carlin: He shouted excitedly.
 * Toby’s Driver: The mail has arrived, and there's a letter for us from the stout gentleman. Maybe it's good news.